Welcome to Gaia! ::

(I'm trying to think of how many more references I can throw in... I don't read enough shonen manga... Well, I guess I DO, but the stuff I read over here no one knows about... Now I feel like I'm just rubbing it in.)

As the train-blade crashes down on the Unnamed Rip-Off, a predictably large cloud of dust is stirred up. As the dust clears for the million and first time, it becomes clear that blow had been parried....

By an enormous, wooden mallet.

A thin seam appears in Lash's Hollow mask. The two halves of it fall to the ground.

"My attacks," he begins before his mouth starts moving, "can penetrate the space-time continuum. You weren't yet wearing the mask I sliced in twain," he finishes after his mouth has stopped.

With a shove, he pushes Mr. Rogers away, and raises the mallet high.

"大金槌！！！！” ('Daikindzuchi' lit. 'Great Hammer') he screams, his voice for once matching up with his lips. The force of the cosmos behind the blow, he brings it down on Lash.

"There is no heaven," he utters ominously, raising Daikindzuchi to parry. The furious power of the Chakra/Reiatsu/Materia strike shatters the mallet, and sends the unnamed warrior flying backwards. He lands in a heap on the ground.

He lays immobile for a few moments, before propping himself up with the remains of his mallet's handle. With some effort he stands. "Joke's on you ********," he sneers, pulling off his Akatsuki Haori. On his chest is the symbol of the Nobody AND the symbol of the Heartless... overlaid on top of each other!

"DAIKINDZUCHI!" he yells, throwing the stick into the air. "Release your true power!" He does a series of hand signs, presumably chakra, but actually spelling out "digivolution" in American Sign Language.

The stick begins to glow, and the screen changes. A blueish, spherical grid rotates in the background as a full digital readout of the stick is displayed, and the camera angle pans dramatically around it, unreadable states listed in the corner.

"Daikindzuchi evolve to..." the stick flashes technologically "DAIKIN-KAGUTSUCHI-CLOVERMON"!!!!!!!!!!!

Behind Blade now flies an enormous, gold, demonic, multi-armed, multi-winged dolphin-alien-dragon-spaceship with a mallet handle through its face, the mallet-head now golden, encrusted with thousands of jewels of every color, and covered in alchemaic symbols, like the rest of the bizarre creature's body. The dolphin-alien-dragon-spaceship has a similar Heartless/Nobody emblem on its chest.

Daikin-Kagutsuchi-Clovermon lets out an unearthly screech, and begins to breath Mist, which causes Heartless/Nobodies to start spontaneously forming on the ground around Blade. Additional Dusk-Shadow Heartless/Nobodies begin to spawn from Daikin-Kagutsuchi-Clovermon's skin and fall to Blade's side.

"And now for my other Zanpakuto. JUKAGIKEN!" (Gun-key-blade) Blade yells, holding forth his hand. A swirl of friendly looking CGI forms at his hand, and a fancy sword hilt with a revolver chamber appears, which he grabs. "It's a chip only key," he says, pressing a button on the side. With a VOIM, a black light-saber beam in shape of a running chainsaw erupts from the hilt.

"I've got a Bingo later," he growls, looking up at the HBBSPRNTDWM. "Let's make this quick."

(Additional notes: I am fully aware that Heartless have no bodies, and nobodies have no hearts, and therefore to be both is literally to be an utter lack of existence. Please indulge this paradox.

It was also by force of will that I didn't give myself and all of these monsters Hollow holes in their chests. The Menos Grande mask on Daikin-Kagutsuchi-Clovermon would have been a fine, fine touch.... and so would giving the Mallet the color scheme of the King of the Cosmos' head.

Also: omitted final lines:
-"FOR GREAT JUSTICE!!!!" Everyone takes off their zigs.
-"Let's get this party started!" Daikin-Kagutsuchi-Clovermon's hammer horn begins to spin and flashes thousands of lights, producing a Disco-ball like effect.
-Unleashing his ponytail, the unnamed warrior's black hair billows in the wind as he puts on a Guy Fawkes mask and a black trenchcoat.)

"I know it goes without saying," Lash says from the cockpit,twirling a strange sphere around on one finger." But this thing is a gundam, and I'm a newtype, so yeah." He tosses the sphere out of the cockpit, and the Nine-tailed Diamond-WEAPON Wing Megazord catches it. The gundam presses a button on the side of sphere, which enlarges to reveal its true form: A purple and white ball with pink spots surrounding an "M".
With it's free hand, the robot reaches into a backpack-like apparatus and pulls out a red and white "first season" Pokemon league hat, dusts it off, at places it on its head. As it turns the cap backwards, golden hair erupts from underneath the cap, and the machine's eyes turn blue.
"You can't defeat me, nameless warrior," Lash tamaron, the SSNTHBBSPRNTDWMP, says, "Because I run that bingo game."
With a mighty throw, he launches the Master Ball at Daikin-kagutsuchi-clovermon, the ball growing golden hair and an aura of light in mid-arc. (Yeah, it's a super-saiyan master ball, go figure)

(Notes: I don't know the meaning of the word,"restraint")
(Note on Notes:
Restraint, n:
1. a restraining action or influence: freedom from restraint.
2. Sometimes, restraints. a means of or device for restraining, as a harness for the body.
3. the act of restraining, holding back, controlling, or checking.
4. the state or fact of being restrained; deprivation of liberty; confinement.
5. constraint or reserve in feelings, behavior, etc. )

*Pulls out a demon blade* With this sword I will gain the power needed to destroy you and all who opose me! *The sword grows ten times it's normal size* You will die here....

"Ace in the hole? You have no idea." Lash laughs as he maneuvers his robot to recieve the nameless nobody's attack. Meanwhile, the Super-saiyan master ball cracks open, revealing the entire playing card army from Alice in Wonderland.
"You might not be playing with a full deck, samuel," Lash says, "But I sure am!"

The playing card army mills about listlessly, possessing no real power and existing only to further the extended metaphor.

Taking to the air, the Gundam draws a katana, nay, its own zanpakuto.
"Mew helplessly," The giant robot says," 箱のぬれた子猫!!!" (Note: Box of wet kittens, at least as well as I can figure) There is a distinctive meow as a great beam erupts from the end of the blade as the sword is releasing, filling the air with an iridescent glow, the beam completely enveloping The nameless warrior and his familiar/zanpakuto/podigimon.

Inside the cockpit, Lash Tamaron roars with laughter.

I see you have a full deck there Lash! Well two can play that game!
*The giant Big Boy reaches into his pocket and pulls out a giant YuGiOh card deck*

Time to believe in the heart of the cards!!!!
*The Big Boy pulls a card off the top of the deck and suddenly a giant beating heart falls onto the battlefield*

*Blink, blink* Well I wasn't expecting that one....uummm...Go Heart, use Blood Pump!!!!
*The giant heart starts spraying blood all over Vine*

Don't you notice I'm a vampire Chaos? You have increased my power ten fold, and gave me a nutritios meal! blaugh xd

YuGiOh is stupid, for I use pokemon! Go pikachu use zappy attack!