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 Posted: Sun Jul 01, 2007 2:36 pm
For some random reason, I remembered a post I recently saw in the Pro-Life Guild about how abortion affecting no one but the mother is a lie and tell that to the grandparents who just found out they lost their grandchild to abortion...
It got me thinking. We're all pro-choice, of course, and so we support the right to abortion in any (with a few technicalities on some parts e.g. third trimester abortions) situation. So: who have you 'lost' to abortion and how has this affected you?
My sister told me recently that three years ago, when she was 17 (and I was 15), she had an abortion. So, I lost my niece/nephew to abortion. How did I feel? Well, I guess you could say two things. One: I was surprised that she hadn't told me earlier and that my parents had known without objection (she told me in response to reading my LJ equivalent of thread "My Personal Journey To Choice"). Two: I recalled something that could have been it, which was her staying off school for a week with "stomach cramps". I don't remember how old either of us were, though, but that would be Mifeprex (sp?).
So, after the first little while that it took to sink in, I wholly supported her decision. She's my sister; I care more for her than for a tiny clump of cells I've never met that could potentially ruin her life. She was yet to sit important exams, had uni to look forward to, and had been with her boyfriend for a year and a half. They weren't ready to be parents. She got an abortion three years ago, and she's still happy with her decision now, and so am I.
So this is more out of curiosity than discussion, but also a semi-argument against that particular pro-life argument. Who have you 'lost' to abortion?
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Posted: Sun Jul 01, 2007 2:57 pm
My aunt's second child. But it was already dead inside her.
Even if it wasn't, I would've supported her desicion in a whole.
EDIT:
Apparently, we're including whether or not we, and not just family members, have had abortions.
So in that case, I lost a potential cousin, and a potential child.
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Posted: Sun Jul 01, 2007 3:08 pm
A potential cousin, to my knowledge. My aunt has a disorder that's caused every pregnancy to be tubal/ectopic, so she absolutely CANNOT bear children. She's had to terminate every time.
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Posted: Sun Jul 01, 2007 4:34 pm
Apparantley, a potential friend's brother or sister.
We were discussing abortion, he said his mom had one, and I couldn't quite get why he was so upset about it. Maybe I'm just a sociopath...
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Posted: Sun Jul 01, 2007 5:44 pm
By my definition - if they haven't come into this world yet, figuratively speaking (being born) and been apart of my life. Then I haven't 'lost' anyone. surprised
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Posted: Sun Jul 01, 2007 6:26 pm
Joselle`Stark A potential cousin, to my knowledge. My aunt has a disorder that's caused every pregnancy to be tubal/ectopic, so she absolutely CANNOT bear children. She's had to terminate every time.
Not for the fetuses, but for her. Is she interested in adopting someday?
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Posted: Sun Jul 01, 2007 6:57 pm
I "lost" three siblings to spontaneous abortion. Without those miscarriages, my family would likely be in poverty at the moment.
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Posted: Sun Jul 01, 2007 7:53 pm
I lost a sibling. My mom miscarried (had to have an abortion to remove the dead fetus). But that's why my brother exists in the first place.
I see it as a trade off of one sibling for another. If she hadn't miscarried, my brother would never have been born because she only wanted 3 kids, and she would have been pregnant with the miscarried sibling at the time she conceived my brother.
I really don't care one way or another. Because it's a question of "potentiality", I can't regret not knowing someone who NEVER EXISTED to create memories with.
Come back and ask me if they ever get the ability to predict someone's entire life from womb to birth to childhood to adolescence to adulthood to death.
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Posted: Sun Jul 01, 2007 8:34 pm
I lost my son/daughter, Condom McFailure. My boyfriend and I joke about it sometime, like, "If little McFailure was here, we could get that discount on the flight to Disneyland." As you can tell, we feel no remorse. xd
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Posted: Sun Jul 01, 2007 9:42 pm
to my knowledge i've never lost a relative or anything along those lines to abortion but ive lost many friends.
A dear friend of mine was very prolife. I accepted this and really just let it be. It was never a problem for us. Until she got pregnant. I tried to let her know that abortion was an option, explain things to her. I really didnt pressure her into having one at all, but she believed all of the fundy bullshit and immediatly decided that i was a homicidal maniac bent on killing her unborn child.
She's just turned 18 btw, and she's in school still. The father is no where to be found and she thinks adoption is just as bad as abortion. Ontop of all this she's an idiot (not that everyone in her position is an idiot, just that she is, completly).
She told all of our mutual friends who were fundies (why a pack of fundies wanted to hang out with me, the uber pagan ill never know) and theyve all decided to shun me. And started rumors among the girls we know that Í was trying to force her to have an abortion.
So, yeah, ive lost people to abortion. Or rather to the pro-life fundy idea of abortion.
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Posted: Mon Jul 02, 2007 12:10 am
I "lost" cousin
My aunt and uncle dont want kids and she got prego and aborted
i suport them i mean i never new the cells so im ok and they are still very happy people
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Posted: Mon Jul 02, 2007 8:20 am
X.a.p.h.a.n Joselle`Stark A potential cousin, to my knowledge. My aunt has a disorder that's caused every pregnancy to be tubal/ectopic, so she absolutely CANNOT bear children. She's had to terminate every time.
Not for the fetuses, but for her. Is she interested in adopting someday?She has two step-children, who were both absolute horrors. She also kind of plays mother to me, and always has (which is great, since my real mother has always been so awful to me). She moved to the west coast a few years ago, and sends me a few hundred dollars every spring break now. She says it's only fair that I get money every time the step-monsters do. I love her more than anything -- she's always there when I need to talk, no matter where she lives.
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Posted: Mon Jul 02, 2007 8:29 am
My family are all VERY pro-life so if we ever "lost" someone I doubt that I'll ever find out.
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Posted: Mon Jul 02, 2007 10:39 am
In order to lose something, doesn't it have to exist in the first place? caffinated_tulip to my knowledge i've never lost a relative or anything along those lines to abortion but ive lost many friends. A dear friend of mine was very prolife. I accepted this and really just let it be. It was never a problem for us. Until she got pregnant. I tried to let her know that abortion was an option, explain things to her. I really didnt pressure her into having one at all, but she believed all of the fundy bullshit and immediatly decided that i was a homicidal maniac bent on killing her unborn child. She's just turned 18 btw, and she's in school still. The father is no where to be found and she thinks adoption is just as bad as abortion. Ontop of all this she's an idiot (not that everyone in her position is an idiot, just that she is, completly). She told all of our mutual friends who were fundies (why a pack of fundies wanted to hang out with me, the uber pagan ill never know) and theyve all decided to shun me. And started rumors among the girls we know that Í was trying to force her to have an abortion. So, yeah, ive lost people to abortion. Or rather to the pro-life fundy idea of abortion. Okay, now that makes me sad. That's why I could never be real friends with anyone "pro-life." Shallow aquaintances, maybe. But I couldn't trust anyone who didn't respect my right to control my own body. That's just horrible that they would ostracize you like that... I've had it happen to me, but they never spread rumors that horrible.
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Posted: Mon Jul 02, 2007 1:02 pm
I apparently lost a sibling that would have a high chance of being born disabled or with some other form of special needs, because my mom was taking pills to lose weight when she found out. Apparently, said pills affected the fetus. Heh, it's all for the better as far as I'm concerned. Considering our economical status, I'd say that we would be a lot worse if we had a child with special needs to tend to on top of it.
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