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I feel that the mother has the right to see her child

The last time she saw him almost three years ago she kidnapped him for two weeks took him form his school and left.. She enrolled him in a new school. Away from his family all his brothers and sissters go to the old school. We went for court paper and got full custody becuz she had only been out of jail for 2 weeks and that was her second visit.. She was in jail for child neglect and drug possession she had burned her 2 year daughter with a cig 6 times.. Do you have any idea how scary it is not to know where your child is or if hes okay? In the last 3 years she has been picked up on drug Dui and possession 14 times.... In the second week after she took him she dropped him off at school with no underware on ripped jeans no sock and he had 12 spider bites, she never picked him up.. and as she didn't list his father just 3 know drug dealer on his school paperwork, it took them over 3 hours to find his grandmother (my motherinlaw) I don't mind that she see him. it needs to be on our tremes and times.. she has hurt him in the past she has burned him with a cig on 6 diff times and we have pic... I smoked cig for 14 years and NEVER not even once have I burn a child. I quit 6 monthes ago... As mother yes HE needs to see her.. She needs nothing...... It should be about him not her..

Unfortunately for you and your son, the only thing you can do is document what she does to/with him. Every time even the littlest thing happens, document it and make it official. Talk to a lawyer and try to figure out when you have enough to petition that she no longer have access to your little boy. I wish there was a better way, but unfortunately the court system is fairly liberal across the US, meaning they will favor the rights of the mother over those of either the father or even the child, particularly as long as she makes even nominal attempts to "get clean/well/better".

I'm sorry for you, your husband, and especially the little boy you love so much. Keep doing what you can, and hopefully someday it will finally work in your favor. In the meantime, make sure the boy feels comfortable and secure enough to talk about whatever problems he's having, and do your *very* best not to badmouth his mother in front of him. I'm sure she isn't helping there, but the less emotional strain you put on him the better. She must love him on some level, or she wouldn't bother petitioning for visitation at all. Focus on that, so that at least he knows he is loved, even if she's got a shitty way of showing it.

Thanks. I can only pray that she won't hurt him and that she does love him... But it hurts so bad knowing what she has done or let others do to him.. Thanks for the support

well in the five weeks she has had visits she miss 3 of them and hes starting to have problems.. Hes having nightmares again it took almost 2 years for them to go away, and he is now wetting the bed again too.. She has bought him tons of candy and a puppy that he can't have here.. she told him we would kill it or our dog would.. He is not allowed to tell us what he does there. She told him if he did she wouldn't see him anymore. So if we ask if he had fun or even she feed him lunch he just looks at the floor and says he not supposed to tell us.. she can be abusive and has been in the past.. we're afriad some thing going on by the way he is acting.. but we don't know what to do..... I do know that she has not been feeding him for he comes home hungy and says he needs lunch and dinner.. when i ask him what he had he say candy and soda... becuase of heath issues he's not to have soda (adhd).. But she don't care.. And when she giving him nothing but soda and candy he comes home tired and crabby.. He told his father i don't have to listen to you anymore, my REAL mommy says so.. aaaaaaaaaaa i knew this was going to happen this is what happened right before she left almost 3years ago.. she turned him againest us then left him..... it messed him up real good and now she doing it all over again.. and in the 3 years she was gone her mother died......... On the second visit right in front of my mother in law told him "you know your grandmother well you can't see her she died so youll never get to see her again..." and said it with a mean smile.. How could she do that to him?!!!!! My poor baby.....

This is actually Laren; Yvaine is letting me post because of your problem, as I'm a police officer.

Document, document, document. If she's had problems, she probably has a counselor or a probation officer. Talk to them and let them know what's going on. If this is supposed to help her, exercising her maniacal sadism is probably something they've overlooked.

Read the fine print on the visitation agreement, and see if you can finagle supervision out of it.

Fill a marble notebook with every date and time he comes home hungry and acting strange. Take it to court, and take her visitation rights away.

The biggest thing is not to fear her, and make sure that your son knows what's going on and why its wrong. Even if he won't talk to you, that doesn't mean you can't talk to him. Let him know your suspicions, and make sure to let him know that he hasn't done anything wrong.

The system's on your side, but only if you use it properly. Your son needs a mom, and she obviously doesn't want to be one.

Well first over night went the same as the 2 years he lived with her... He played outside all day was sunburned.. He stay up past midnight with a 12 year girl in a tent.. When asked if She stayed up with them or at least did her boyfriend he told us no that his mother and boyfriend went to their room after dinner closed the door and that this girl watched him. The first over night she had went just like the old times she had him. we used to get calls when he was little that she had dropped him off and never came back for him.. Some times this calls would come after a day of her gone. All ready i see her doing the same thing... We asked if he has been having fun with her,, he says he plays the computer and she goes to her room with the door closed.. sigh............ I don't now how much of it is him playing us off each other as kids do.. I strongly believe she is back to her usual ways and he is being left out again.. If she want visits so bad then visit with him.. I mean come on step up and love him with all you got not just as an after thought of some thing you think you should have.. He had on dirty clothes the same he had left in on Friday but minus the underwear and socks.. WHERE the hell is his under ware?? and socks what is with that.. She alway takes them but he never has any on when hes with her... He had an accident at church and not the kind of accident a 7 year old has if you know what i mean.. But did she call for underwear no did she get some for him no did she even wash them.. nothing at all.. Just like she has always done.