|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Wed Jun 29, 2005 7:03 am
I feel like such a bother bringing this up, but I need some advice. My boyfriend is not LDS, but he's a good guy mostly. He's going off to college and he's telling me about all the girls he saw. And he makes perverted jokes about trying to get with them. He's never triend to force me into anything I didn't want to do, but I think he's gonna go to a frat party, get drunk, high(contact buzz), or both, and do something he'll later regret. I want to protect him, but when he's gonna be an hour away, I can't. What should I do?
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Jun 29, 2005 7:13 am
pray. ask him not to do anything and if he does youll treatin to T@tto (comp sencer) i did a regreatable thing on his forhead. 3nodding
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Jun 29, 2005 1:19 pm
well, when i went off to college...i did alot of things i regret now... but didnt at the time.....for me it ended up being a party with a $10,000 cover charge
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Jun 29, 2005 1:24 pm
good question, i would help you out, but other than prayer and just straightforward telling him not to get himself into all that regretable crap, i got nuthing
sweatdrop
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Jun 29, 2005 2:01 pm
You can only do so much. It would be a good idea to speak with him about your concerns - Forgive my saying so, but if he's the sort that wouldn't be able to understand that you are worried about him because of those sorts of reasons, it might not be the best idea to be involved with him in a more-than-friend relationship. Hopefully he'll listen, and do his best to avoid painful situations. Hope for the best, and show him your support and caring.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Jul 01, 2005 8:08 am
im sorry to say this, but i wouldnt count on it, they say in the church to watch your thought for the thought leads to the action, i hope for you that he is good. but personally if he acts the way he does, then itll take a great force to change him for i believe he is too cofurtable in the ways of the world. if he is joking around and being perverted then a part of him wants to but there is that part that doesnt. if he respects you then he would kid about those things, im soo loyal to my girlfriend to the point i wont even look at another woman.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Jul 01, 2005 10:06 am
original godsmack im sorry to say this, but i wouldnt count on it, they say in the church to watch your thought for the thought leads to the action, i hope for you that he is good. but personally if he acts the way he does, then itll take a great force to change him for i believe he is too cofurtable in the ways of the world. if he is joking around and being perverted then a part of him wants to but there is that part that doesnt. if he respects you then he would kid about those things, im soo loyal to my girlfriend to the point i wont even look at another woman. gee, just be straight forward... but yeah, what he said. Cept' the boyfriend/girlfriend part sweatdrop whee
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Jul 02, 2005 9:00 am
i hate to be the bummer on this one, but why are you going out with him? if he's even WILLING to go to a frat party, if he's even WILLING to get drunk...well, why? neutral *shrug* i know this sounds mean, but you can do better methinks. *runs and hides where hopefully you won't find/hurt me*
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Jul 02, 2005 9:52 am
Forget him. He's not going to treat you like a daughter of God in the end, and you know it. If he's a frat party kind of guy, then he's not worth your time. (just like the people above me said.)
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Jul 17, 2005 2:46 pm
Well, he's not so much talking about other girls. Right now, when we say goodbye on my front porch anymore, it seems he's being a little ritualistic. He'll hug me, then hold me(hugs last less than 30 seconds, holding is longer.), squeeze me(not too hard), then he'll push me back(but I'm still in his arms), then he'll kiss me half on the cheek/half on the lips.
This isn't the first time he's been a "ritualistic drone". When I broke up with him, he'd stare at me while he was in line and I was at my lunchtable. Also in choir, he'd look at me with this expression of serious hurt whenever neither his nor my section wasn't singing. Should I be concerned?
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Jul 17, 2005 5:18 pm
Samantha_Grey Well, he's not so much talking about other girls. Right now, when we say goodbye on my front porch anymore, it seems he's being a little ritualistic. He'll hug me, then hold me(hugs last less than 30 seconds, holding is longer.), squeeze me(not too hard), then he'll push me back(but I'm still in his arms), then he'll kiss me half on the cheek/half on the lips. This isn't the first time he's been a "ritualistic drone". When I broke up with him, he'd stare at me while he was in line and I was at my lunchtable. Also in choir, he'd look at me with this expression of serious hurt whenever neither his nor my section wasn't singing. Should I be concerned? sounds to me like he's tryin to lay a guilt trip on you of some sort....tryin to make you feel a little sorry for him....my advice....next time you have the lil ritualistic dealy thing....just say that this aint gonna work, kiss him on the cheek, and say goodbye..... i dunno, breakups/first loves are always vicous
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Jul 17, 2005 10:56 pm
I think he is being manipulative. Grrrrr. scream SEVALON BEAT HIM GOOD! sweatdrop j/k. I hate manipulations. He feels in control of you and if he can make you come back to him with guilt trips and such, then he's not going to change for you. Let him know how you feel. As you get older, your going to talk more with people. You was a woman will need that. If you want a good book to learn about relationships, read "Why men won't listen and Women can't read maps" sorry girls. whee If you can comfortably talk with him and feel like your actually getting somewhere. Can you see a positive relationship in the next year? How will it affect you? if it is negative, drop him.
In the mean time, we as a guild will love an support you.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Jul 22, 2005 7:17 pm
Thanks. It was weird. Today, I went over to his house(with others around), and when we were watching tv, he started to grab me and hold me close. It was really freaking me out. Of couse, being my "perfect lady" self, when he asked me what was wrong, I just said, "Nothing." I was afraid if I told him that he was moving a little fast for me, he'd be offended. I was also a little scared that I'd get in trouble with his dad.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Jul 22, 2005 7:56 pm
Okay, you know what? You need to be upfront and honest with him. Maybe not as blunt as I am, but you need to do something. My opinion is that you shouldn't be hanging out with him at all, because of everything that the pamphlet, For the Strength of Youth says. This is the reason I broke up with Robert, but hey, let's not get into me, k? Dating Date only those who have high standards and in whose company you can maintain your standards. A young man and a young woman . . . Are responsible to help each other maintain their standards and to protect each other's honor and virtue . . . Do things that will help you and your companion(s) maintain your self-respect and remain close to the Spirit of the Lord. After reading this thread, my opinion of this guy is that he's just not doing this for you, and you need a guy who will. Same thing goes for "just being freinds," because the pamphlet says the same thing basically. Stick with those who have your standards, who aren't afraid to be good people, and who aren't going to make you feel uncomfortable. I mean seriously, why would you want to be with a guy that makes you uncomfortable, and afraid to speak up? If you answer, "because I like/love him," then why on earth do you like him? Because to me, if a guy makes you uncomfortable, and afraid to stick up for your standards and beliefs, then there's not really much left to like, unless he has really good looks. wink [edit] Also, this goes for both members as well as non-members, because I know members who can and will make you feel bad if you let them, and non-members who make you so happy and feel so safe like you would think a "good little Mormon boy" would. 3nodding
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Jul 31, 2005 2:58 pm
Well, I told him that his behavior freaked me out a bit, and he told me he'd be willing to stop.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
