Telemarketers

[Wind-Whisper]

Telemarketers! The plague of our lives! Here's you chance to tell off an annoying telemarketer who calls you right durting dinner or who wakes you up right fater you've gone to bed.

Here's a starter:

~~~~~

(Telemarketer calls to sell insurance...)


I don't care what you're selling, you're my friend. I don't have any real friends. Would you like to be my friend? I'm into really sacry things, and would love to have you over.

(Telemarketer calls to sell soap...)  

[KO-KO]

(Telemarketer calls to sell soap...)

"No thanks - with your cheap soap, I might slip in the bathtub!"


(Telemarketer calls to sell ostrich eggs...)  

[Dangerboy3]

(telemarketer calls to sell ostrich eggs)

"No thanks, I'll just have some elefant tusks and penguin eyes instead."

(telemarketer calls to sell frozen dead cats) ((thats scary!!!))  

[goddessofforever]

(telemarketer calls to sell frozen dead cats)

"THE WHEELS ON THE BUS GO ROUND AND ROUND, ROUND AND ROUND, ROUND AND ROUND! THE WHEELS ON THE BUS GO ROUND AND ROUND ALL THROUGH THE TOWN!"

(telemarketer calling to sell a way to get rid of telemarketers)  

[Saikii]

(telemarketer calling to sell a way to get rid of telemarketers)

"Can you hear me now? Good! Can You hear me now? Good! Can you Hear me now..."

(telemarketer calling to sell insurance quotes)  

[crazydude444292]

(telemarketer calling to sell insurance quotes)

"i already have life, death, housing, and auto insurance. what kind are you trying to sell to me? gamers insurance?"

(telemarketer calling to sell chicago cubs world series tickets)  

[Wind-Whisper]

(telemarketer calling to sell chicago cubs world series tickets)

"I hate baseball. Come back when you have opera tickets."

(telemarketer calls to tell you you've won a carribbean cruise)  

[strange_dreams_512]

(telemarketer calls to tell you you've won a carribbean cruise)

"Carribbean cruise, eh? Does Japan count as carribean? Take me to Japan. I want to go to Japan. Can I borrow $1000? Please? Oh! I'll just write you a check for -$1000. That outta do it. That is, unless you want to give me the tickets right now. *rants about plushies to buy* I'll have L, Fai, Kakashi, Dark, Kyo...did you notice that all of those are mysterious people? Then there's Chi. Oh I HAVE to get Chi. And then there's that $100 lolita I have to buy...that'll look great at the Kumoricon..."

(telemarketer calls to sell phones)  

[goddessofforever]

(telemarketer calls to sell phones)

"Eh? I can't hear you, my phone broke!"

(Telemarketer calling to sell domokun s ))  

[Dangerboy3]

(telemarketer calls to sell domokun s)

"ive already sent one to eat your legs, what more do I want?"

(telemarketer calls to sell a kick in the knees)  

[Neptune Bride]

(telemarketer calls selling a kick in the knees)

Ok, I'll buy a kick in the knee from you if you but a kick in the balls from me (since I always seem to get men)

(Telemarketer calls selling satilite TV)  

[KO-KO]

(Telemarketer calls selling satilite TV)

Satellite TV is NO GOOD if you can't get me the NHK feed! Get that, and I'll think about it.

(Telemarketer calls selling pedigreed, guaranteed unicorns)  

[Raven_Spero]

(Telemarketer calls selling pedigreed, guaranteed unicorns)

really now? thats a new one, y'mean they finnally figured out how to clone a mutation? that's really interesting. y'know, my great great grandfather knew how tro clone things, and graft things too, like he grafted a cherry tree with a peach tree so in the summer wer always had cherry-peach pie for dessert, but it was cooler because the cherry and the peach were the same fruit! hahaha! i like peaches and cherries in pie together. do you? do you like cherries and peaches in the same pie. i know some people who don't but they're crazy. i love peaches and cherries in the same pie together. i really like when they's put walnuts and almonds in it too. mmm- mmm mmm. y'know what else i like with walnits? cinnamin buns, the really big warm sticky ones, the ones you can't eat without licking your fingers, covered in warm yummy icing....

(telemarketer selling collars for your pet fish)  

[Dangerboy3]

(telemarketer calls to sell collars for my pet fish.)

oh, a collar for the one i sent to you in the mail? nah.

(telemarketer calls to sell you!)  

[SilentShadowDreamer]

(telemarketer calls to sell you)

Sorry. I just made it onto that ultimate Do Not Call list in the sky. If you'd called a few minutes earlier...!

(telemarketer calls to sell anchovies)