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 Posted: Sat Jan 13, 2007 4:25 pm
Yo. The main reason i joined this guild is to talk with other FFAs and FAs about thier good and bad experiences. I've been practicly outcasted from my family for being an FFA--but i still refuse to give up dating large men cuz my folks say thats the way it should be. They seem to think my life will be ruin cuz i "gotta pay for my spouces donut habit" I wanna here what other FFAs and FAs experience.
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Posted: Mon Jan 15, 2007 10:14 pm
As a BBW (big beautiful woman, I'm actually not familiar with the term FFA or FA) who loves bigger women, my situation hasn't been as bad as yours, but I sympathize. I haven't been kicked out or anything by my family for being bigger or dating someone bigger, but when I was a teenager my mother put all of her issues with her own weight onto me and made me diet and all that. It was miserable, but eventually she gave up, and I've learned to love my body even though people say I shouldn't. I guess most people would still consider me "ugly," but I've also learned that I don't need the attention. The people that really matter will see me as beautiful and I shouldn't have to cater to everyone else's concept of beauty in order to feel beautiful. When I started dating my girlfriend, who as I mentioned is also a bigger girl (and GORGEOUS), it was never really an issue with anyone I know. No one in my family has brought it up, and my friends all love her. I guess I'm pretty lucky.
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Posted: Tue Jan 16, 2007 6:27 pm
Badgergrrrl As a BBW (big beautiful woman, I'm actually not familiar with the term FFA or FA) who loves bigger women, my situation hasn't been as bad as yours, but I sympathize. I haven't been kicked out or anything by my family for being bigger or dating someone bigger, but when I was a teenager my mother put all of her issues with her own weight onto me and made me diet and all that. It was miserable, but eventually she gave up, and I've learned to love my body even though people say I shouldn't. I guess most people would still consider me "ugly," but I've also learned that I don't need the attention. The people that really matter will see me as beautiful and I shouldn't have to cater to everyone else's concept of beauty in order to feel beautiful. When I started dating my girlfriend, who as I mentioned is also a bigger girl (and GORGEOUS), it was never really an issue with anyone I know. No one in my family has brought it up, and my friends all love her. I guess I'm pretty lucky. In ways you are. in others you are not. You still feel the strain of society to a point. I just come from a nonaccepting family i guess but you helped a little. I mean, I still havent told them im bisexual even though they kinda know im an FFA since all the men they find out about are larger. I guess you gotta know where to be free at. Oh and FA= Fat admirer and FFA= Female Fat Admirer.
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Posted: Thu Jan 18, 2007 8:36 am
Joss-Box Badgergrrrl As a BBW (big beautiful woman, I'm actually not familiar with the term FFA or FA) who loves bigger women, my situation hasn't been as bad as yours, but I sympathize. I haven't been kicked out or anything by my family for being bigger or dating someone bigger, but when I was a teenager my mother put all of her issues with her own weight onto me and made me diet and all that. It was miserable, but eventually she gave up, and I've learned to love my body even though people say I shouldn't. I guess most people would still consider me "ugly," but I've also learned that I don't need the attention. The people that really matter will see me as beautiful and I shouldn't have to cater to everyone else's concept of beauty in order to feel beautiful. When I started dating my girlfriend, who as I mentioned is also a bigger girl (and GORGEOUS), it was never really an issue with anyone I know. No one in my family has brought it up, and my friends all love her. I guess I'm pretty lucky. In ways you are. in others you are not. You still feel the strain of society to a point. I just come from a nonaccepting family i guess but you helped a little. I mean, I still havent told them im bisexual even though they kinda know im an FFA since all the men they find out about are larger. I guess you gotta know where to be free at. Oh and FA= Fat admirer and FFA= Female Fat Admirer. Thanks for letting me know what those mean biggrin And that still sucks how unaccepting your family is. Why should they care what size the people you like are as long as they treat you right? Are they extremely homophobic too? I can understand the angst of not being out in a family setting. I didn't come out to my father for ages because he's EXTREMELY homophobic, and I really thought he would kill me if I told him. My mother actually got told by my aunt, who found out by accident, and she was fine with it. Her entire side of the family has been awesome about it, actually. But I do know how scary that can be.
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Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 12:10 pm
I've pretty much kept my preference hidden from most everyone I know, because of how closed-minded people tend to be. neutral
My current girlfriend (I had 8 previous ones) is the first and only person I have shared my feelings on the subject with. When I started dating her, she was pretty much average sized, she's around 5'5" and was about 130 lbs. at the time. While we were dating, she started to put on weight, and I knew she detested it, and she also turned out to think that I would find her unattractive if she continued, and didn't work to lose the excess. (Ha ha, boy was she wrong! :XP: )
When she ended up getting to about 140 lbs., I told her, and she was incredibly confused, and to this day, she still is slightly. But she has been gradually gaining confidence, and has even gained more weight (most of it by accident, though, courtesy of the holidays sweatdrop )
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Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 4:26 pm
Badgergrrrl Joss-Box Badgergrrrl As a BBW (big beautiful woman, I'm actually not familiar with the term FFA or FA) who loves bigger women, my situation hasn't been as bad as yours, but I sympathize. I haven't been kicked out or anything by my family for being bigger or dating someone bigger, but when I was a teenager my mother put all of her issues with her own weight onto me and made me diet and all that. It was miserable, but eventually she gave up, and I've learned to love my body even though people say I shouldn't. I guess most people would still consider me "ugly," but I've also learned that I don't need the attention. The people that really matter will see me as beautiful and I shouldn't have to cater to everyone else's concept of beauty in order to feel beautiful. When I started dating my girlfriend, who as I mentioned is also a bigger girl (and GORGEOUS), it was never really an issue with anyone I know. No one in my family has brought it up, and my friends all love her. I guess I'm pretty lucky. In ways you are. in others you are not. You still feel the strain of society to a point. I just come from a nonaccepting family i guess but you helped a little. I mean, I still havent told them im bisexual even though they kinda know im an FFA since all the men they find out about are larger. I guess you gotta know where to be free at. Oh and FA= Fat admirer and FFA= Female Fat Admirer. Thanks for letting me know what those mean biggrin And that still sucks how unaccepting your family is. Why should they care what size the people you like are as long as they treat you right? Are they extremely homophobic too? I can understand the angst of not being out in a family setting. I didn't come out to my father for ages because he's EXTREMELY homophobic, and I really thought he would kill me if I told him. My mother actually got told by my aunt, who found out by accident, and she was fine with it. Her entire side of the family has been awesome about it, actually. But I do know how scary that can be. extremely homophobic! they found out about me being an FFA because my brother caught me with the 300 lb kid at our school. i went with a guy before that was big but they assumed i was just in a low spot. then they saw it was becoming a trend--i just confessed. but i know theyll kick me out if they know about my previous girlfriends. my dad thinks its sick and demented, my mother is just religious. either way i loose.
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Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 4:31 pm
+Gloria Domini+ I've pretty much kept my preference hidden from most everyone I know, because of how closed-minded people tend to be. neutral
My current girlfriend (I had 8 previous ones) is the first and only person I have shared my feelings on the subject with. When I started dating her, she was pretty much average sized, she's around 5'5" and was about 130 lbs. at the time. While we were dating, she started to put on weight, and I knew she detested it, and she also turned out to think that I would find her unattractive if she continued, and didn't work to lose the excess. (Ha ha, boy was she wrong! :XP: )
When she ended up getting to about 140 lbs., I told her, and she was incredibly confused, and to this day, she still is slightly. But she has been gradually gaining confidence, and has even gained more weight (most of it by accident, though, courtesy of the holidays sweatdrop ) its good that you support her. your a good person. i know im around the same dimentions and there are guys/girls who tell me im fat to my face (including ones ive dated) and guys/girls who tell me im not. Its good you gave her some elbow room and that you let her know you'll still be interested.
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Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 6:31 pm
+Gloria Domini+ I've pretty much kept my preference hidden from most everyone I know, because of how closed-minded people tend to be. neutral
My current girlfriend (I had 8 previous ones) is the first and only person I have shared my feelings on the subject with. When I started dating her, she was pretty much average sized, she's around 5'5" and was about 130 lbs. at the time. While we were dating, she started to put on weight, and I knew she detested it, and she also turned out to think that I would find her unattractive if she continued, and didn't work to lose the excess. (Ha ha, boy was she wrong! :XP: )
When she ended up getting to about 140 lbs., I told her, and she was incredibly confused, and to this day, she still is slightly. But she has been gradually gaining confidence, and has even gained more weight (most of it by accident, though, courtesy of the holidays sweatdrop ) First, get it out if the opportunity to comes up. Odds are you're overestimating people's reactions. Anyway, if you're closeted and you've got a GF, you could be hurting her. I hope you're not the kind of person who avoids being seen in public with a "fat girl".
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Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 8:14 pm
Joss-Box Badgergrrrl Joss-Box Badgergrrrl As a BBW (big beautiful woman, I'm actually not familiar with the term FFA or FA) who loves bigger women, my situation hasn't been as bad as yours, but I sympathize. I haven't been kicked out or anything by my family for being bigger or dating someone bigger, but when I was a teenager my mother put all of her issues with her own weight onto me and made me diet and all that. It was miserable, but eventually she gave up, and I've learned to love my body even though people say I shouldn't. I guess most people would still consider me "ugly," but I've also learned that I don't need the attention. The people that really matter will see me as beautiful and I shouldn't have to cater to everyone else's concept of beauty in order to feel beautiful. When I started dating my girlfriend, who as I mentioned is also a bigger girl (and GORGEOUS), it was never really an issue with anyone I know. No one in my family has brought it up, and my friends all love her. I guess I'm pretty lucky. In ways you are. in others you are not. You still feel the strain of society to a point. I just come from a nonaccepting family i guess but you helped a little. I mean, I still havent told them im bisexual even though they kinda know im an FFA since all the men they find out about are larger. I guess you gotta know where to be free at. Oh and FA= Fat admirer and FFA= Female Fat Admirer. Thanks for letting me know what those mean biggrin And that still sucks how unaccepting your family is. Why should they care what size the people you like are as long as they treat you right? Are they extremely homophobic too? I can understand the angst of not being out in a family setting. I didn't come out to my father for ages because he's EXTREMELY homophobic, and I really thought he would kill me if I told him. My mother actually got told by my aunt, who found out by accident, and she was fine with it. Her entire side of the family has been awesome about it, actually. But I do know how scary that can be. extremely homophobic! they found out about me being an FFA because my brother caught me with the 300 lb kid at our school. i went with a guy before that was big but they assumed i was just in a low spot. then they saw it was becoming a trend--i just confessed. but i know theyll kick me out if they know about my previous girlfriends. my dad thinks its sick and demented, my mother is just religious. either way i loose. Aww, for some reason I find that to be kinda cute. Not your meanie parents, just the part about you being with the chubby kid. Iss cute.
I think for me I like chubby guys more also because they have better personalities....they're not so self-absorbed. This can also mean that they have no self-respect or self-worth, but that's a bit easier to work with than vanity. sweatdrop
But then again my chubby boyfriend acts like a total bratty snob alot too, so oh well. sweatdrop
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Posted: Sat Jan 20, 2007 7:27 am
Fuzzy Necromancer +Gloria Domini+ I've pretty much kept my preference hidden from most everyone I know, because of how closed-minded people tend to be. neutral
My current girlfriend (I had 8 previous ones) is the first and only person I have shared my feelings on the subject with. When I started dating her, she was pretty much average sized, she's around 5'5" and was about 130 lbs. at the time. While we were dating, she started to put on weight, and I knew she detested it, and she also turned out to think that I would find her unattractive if she continued, and didn't work to lose the excess. (Ha ha, boy was she wrong! :XP: )
When she ended up getting to about 140 lbs., I told her, and she was incredibly confused, and to this day, she still is slightly. But she has been gradually gaining confidence, and has even gained more weight (most of it by accident, though, courtesy of the holidays sweatdrop ) First, get it out if the opportunity to comes up. Odds are you're overestimating people's reactions. Anyway, if you're closeted and you've got a GF, you could be hurting her. I hope you're not the kind of person who avoids being seen in public with a "fat girl". Oh, no. We still go out just as often as ever. The way it is, is everyone knows I love her and find her very attractive. They just haven't been told that I find her incredibly attractive because she's heavier. And I'm actually going to be supporting her losing a bit of weight here soon, because she wants to. 3nodding
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Posted: Sat Jan 20, 2007 10:02 am
Joss-Box extremely homophobic! they found out about me being an FFA because my brother caught me with the 300 lb kid at our school. i went with a guy before that was big but they assumed i was just in a low spot. then they saw it was becoming a trend--i just confessed. but i know theyll kick me out if they know about my previous girlfriends. my dad thinks its sick and demented, my mother is just religious. either way i loose. Ouch, that sucks. And its stupid of your brother to have assumed that you were a FFA because you were hanging out with someone who's bigger (unless I misread that and you were doing something else), and that's not something to freak out over in the first place. As for your parents' homophobia, I'm sorry. I've totally been there. But when I came out, it wasn't entirely as bad as I thought it was going to be. My mother, who was also very religious at that point, actually had no problem with it. And when I accidentally came out to my father, who I knew hated gays and thought was going to kill me, he was also very accepting of both me and my girlfriend. So there may be hope yet. Still, I offer you my sympathy and lots of hugs *hugs*
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Posted: Sun Jan 21, 2007 4:40 pm
First, get it out if the opportunity to comes up. Odds are you're overestimating people's reactions. Anyway, if you're closeted and you've got a GF, you could be hurting her. I hope you're not the kind of person who avoids being seen in public with a "fat girl".
AMEN TO THAT!!! THATS HOW EVERYONE SHOULD FEEL. TOO BAD THEY DONT.
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Posted: Sun Jan 21, 2007 4:44 pm
Badgergrrrl Joss-Box extremely homophobic! they found out about me being an FFA because my brother caught me with the 300 lb kid at our school. i went with a guy before that was big but they assumed i was just in a low spot. then they saw it was becoming a trend--i just confessed. but i know theyll kick me out if they know about my previous girlfriends. my dad thinks its sick and demented, my mother is just religious. either way i loose. Ouch, that sucks. And its stupid of your brother to have assumed that you were a FFA because you were hanging out with someone who's bigger (unless I misread that and you were doing something else), and that's not something to freak out over in the first place. As for your parents' homophobia, I'm sorry. I've totally been there. But when I came out, it wasn't entirely as bad as I thought it was going to be. My mother, who was also very religious at that point, actually had no problem with it. And when I accidentally came out to my father, who I knew hated gays and thought was going to kill me, he was also very accepting of both me and my girlfriend. So there may be hope yet. Still, I offer you my sympathy and lots of hugs *hugs* thanks. that helps. I did tell my mother but she thought i was trying to insult her cuz we were fighting about how i keep secrets from her. So now she just thinks i was kidding. i just never corrected her i guess cuz shes ok with gays, she just wont be very happy if she finds out her own daughter is bisexual.
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Posted: Sun Jan 21, 2007 4:48 pm
Chachamaru-kun Joss-Box Badgergrrrl Joss-Box Badgergrrrl As a BBW (big beautiful woman, I'm actually not familiar with the term FFA or FA) who loves bigger women, my situation hasn't been as bad as yours, but I sympathize. I haven't been kicked out or anything by my family for being bigger or dating someone bigger, but when I was a teenager my mother put all of her issues with her own weight onto me and made me diet and all that. It was miserable, but eventually she gave up, and I've learned to love my body even though people say I shouldn't. I guess most people would still consider me "ugly," but I've also learned that I don't need the attention. The people that really matter will see me as beautiful and I shouldn't have to cater to everyone else's concept of beauty in order to feel beautiful. When I started dating my girlfriend, who as I mentioned is also a bigger girl (and GORGEOUS), it was never really an issue with anyone I know. No one in my family has brought it up, and my friends all love her. I guess I'm pretty lucky. In ways you are. in others you are not. You still feel the strain of society to a point. I just come from a nonaccepting family i guess but you helped a little. I mean, I still havent told them im bisexual even though they kinda know im an FFA since all the men they find out about are larger. I guess you gotta know where to be free at. Oh and FA= Fat admirer and FFA= Female Fat Admirer. Thanks for letting me know what those mean biggrin And that still sucks how unaccepting your family is. Why should they care what size the people you like are as long as they treat you right? Are they extremely homophobic too? I can understand the angst of not being out in a family setting. I didn't come out to my father for ages because he's EXTREMELY homophobic, and I really thought he would kill me if I told him. My mother actually got told by my aunt, who found out by accident, and she was fine with it. Her entire side of the family has been awesome about it, actually. But I do know how scary that can be. extremely homophobic! they found out about me being an FFA because my brother caught me with the 300 lb kid at our school. i went with a guy before that was big but they assumed i was just in a low spot. then they saw it was becoming a trend--i just confessed. but i know theyll kick me out if they know about my previous girlfriends. my dad thinks its sick and demented, my mother is just religious. either way i loose. Aww, for some reason I find that to be kinda cute. Not your meanie parents, just the part about you being with the chubby kid. Iss cute.
I think for me I like chubby guys more also because they have better personalities....they're not so self-absorbed. This can also mean that they have no self-respect or self-worth, but that's a bit easier to work with than vanity. sweatdrop
But then again my chubby boyfriend acts like a total bratty snob alot too, so oh well. sweatdrop oh yeah--dont i know it. He gets pretty violent, but not to me. Hes got a hit list. But i agree, he isnt self absorbed at all. But my man likes that hes big and is proud so i guess selfworth isnt a big problem but Hes a lot shyer though to me cuz he hasnt been with many girls. That is kind bad sometimes cuz he doesnt like to show me how he feels.
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Posted: Sun Jan 21, 2007 6:15 pm
Joss-Box Badgergrrrl Joss-Box extremely homophobic! they found out about me being an FFA because my brother caught me with the 300 lb kid at our school. i went with a guy before that was big but they assumed i was just in a low spot. then they saw it was becoming a trend--i just confessed. but i know theyll kick me out if they know about my previous girlfriends. my dad thinks its sick and demented, my mother is just religious. either way i loose. Ouch, that sucks. And its stupid of your brother to have assumed that you were a FFA because you were hanging out with someone who's bigger (unless I misread that and you were doing something else), and that's not something to freak out over in the first place. As for your parents' homophobia, I'm sorry. I've totally been there. But when I came out, it wasn't entirely as bad as I thought it was going to be. My mother, who was also very religious at that point, actually had no problem with it. And when I accidentally came out to my father, who I knew hated gays and thought was going to kill me, he was also very accepting of both me and my girlfriend. So there may be hope yet. Still, I offer you my sympathy and lots of hugs *hugs* thanks. that helps. I did tell my mother but she thought i was trying to insult her cuz we were fighting about how i keep secrets from her. So now she just thinks i was kidding. i just never corrected her i guess cuz shes ok with gays, she just wont be very happy if she finds out her own daughter is bisexual. You're welcome! And in a weird way I'm not surprised that your mom is okay with gay people but would freak out if she found out you're bi. Parents can have lots of double-standards when it comes to their children. There's also a lot of people, I find, who are okay with homosexuality but think bisexuality doesn't exist (which is completely ridiculous). My mother's like that. I guess I'm lucky I'm a full blown dyke, I don't think she could handle it otherwise sweatdrop
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