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The real reason DoD gave us the internet

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Patsy Walker

PostPosted: Thu Jan 04, 2007 9:46 pm


Why was the internet handed over to the general public? What could possibly prompt such a move by the DoD? It all started simply enough, random postings by Army, Navy, Marines, and Air Force brass discussing strategy and tactics, but it wasn't long before things took a turn for the worse. The following is a transcript of one such discussion.

T3H NAV3Y IS T3H REZUN W4 L0ST V33UTNAMN

- Air Force General

*******

LRN2WAR U N00BZ u had mor plaenz tehn us adn we shot down more emeny fighhters tahn u did lawlz besydes u nededd more d at se asuh

- Admiral of the Navy

*******

zomg air pwned by the squids11!11!!

- USMC Commanding General

*******

hey we culdnt use our planez cuz we had 2 bomb the north vietnum back 2 t3h stone age

- Air Force General

*******

tehy were arleady in teh stone age u n00bs

- Director of the CIA

*******

ZOMGROFLWAFFLESAUCE

QQ more noobs

- Admiral of the Navy

*******

With such an intellectual display, congress reasoned that the general populace couldn't possibly do any worse with it.
PostPosted: Thu Jan 04, 2007 9:50 pm


I see we took another stupid pill to help inspire us with this one, eh?

G r e t a Hayes


Zachary Overkill

PostPosted: Thu Jan 04, 2007 9:52 pm


That Navy Admiral totally pwned those nubs.
PostPosted: Thu Jan 04, 2007 9:54 pm


LRN2WAR N00BZ heart

Patsy Walker


Father B.D. Robo Crush

PostPosted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 12:03 am


Lolz, t3h army is stell bettr than all u n00b branches. W3 p0wnz j00 @ warr!!!

-Army Chief of Staff
PostPosted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 12:33 am


LOLZ NOWAI T3H N4V3Y PWNXX0RZ AL U LOLWTFX

Jessica Drew


Ricochet Rita

PostPosted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 11:54 am


Jessica Drew
LOLZ NOWAI T3H N4V3Y PWNXX0RZ AL U LOLWTFX


OMFGIJANE!
PostPosted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 1:08 pm


A friend dug up this little gem on another forums, and I figured I'd share;

If WWII was an RTS:

*Hitler[AoE] has joined the game.*
*Eisenhower has joined the game.*
*paTTon has joined the game.*
*MacRthr has joined the game. *
*Churchill has joined the game.*
*benny-tow has joined the game.*
*T0J0 has joined the game.*
*Roosevelt has joined the game.*
*Stalin has joined the game.*
*deGaulle has joined the game.*

Roosevelt: hey sup
T0J0: y0
Stalin: hi
Churchill: hi
Hitler[AoE]: cool, i start with panzer tanks!
paTTon: lol more like panzy tanks
T0JO: lol
Roosevelt: o this ******** sucks i got a depression!
benny-tow: haha america sux
Stalin: hey hitler you dont fight me i dont fight u, cool?
Hitler[AoE]; sure whatever
Stalin: cool
deGaulle: s**t Hitler rushed some1 help
Hitler[AoE]: lol byebye frenchy
Roosevelt: i dont got s**t to help, sry
Churchill: wtf the luftwaffle is attacking me
Roosevelt: get antiair guns
Churchill: i cant afford them
benny-tow: u n00bs know what team talk is?
paTTon: stfu
Roosevelt: o yah hit the navajo button guys
deGaulle: eisenhower ur worthless come help me quick
Eisenhower: i cant do s**t til rosevelt gives me an army
paTTon: yah hurry the ******** up
Churchill: d00d IM gettin pounded
deGaulle: this is ******** weak u guys suck
*deGaulle has left the game.*
Roosevelt: IM gonna attack the axis k?
benny-tow: with what? ur wheelchair?
benny-tow: lol did u mess up ur legs AND ur head?
Hitler[AoE]: ROFLMAO
T0J0: lol o no america IM comin 4 u
Roosevelt: wtf! thats bullshit u fags IM gunna kick ur asses
T0JO: not without ur harbors u wont! lol
Roosevelt: u little b***h ill get u
T0J0: mac i’m totally kicking ur a**
MacRthr: BRB AFK

Hitler[AoE]: wtf
Hitler[AoE]: america hax, u had depression and now u got a ******** army
Hitler[AoE]: thats bullshit u hacker
Churchill: lol no more france for u hitler
Hitler[AoE]: tojo help me!
T0J0: wtf u want me to do, IM on the other side of the world retard
Hitler[AoE]: fine ill clear you a path
Stalin: WTF u asshoel! WE HAD A ******** TRUCE
Hitler[AoE]: i changed my mind lol
benny-tow: haha
benny-tow: hey ur losing ur guys in africa IM gonna need help in
italy soon sum1
T0J0: o s**t i cant help u i got my hands full
Hitler[AoE]: IM 2 busy 2 help
Roosevelt: yah thats right b***h IM comin for ya
Stalin: church help me
Churchill: like u helped me before? sure ill just sit here
Stalin: dont be an a**
Churchill: dont be a commie. oops too late
Eisenhower: LOL
benny-tow: hahahh oh s**t help
Hitler: o man ur ********: oh what now b***h
Roosevelt: whos the cripple now lol
*benny-tow has been eliminated.*
benny-tow: lame
Roosevelt: gj patton
paTTon: thnx

Hitler[AoE]: WTF eisenhower hax hes killing all my s**t
Hitler[AoE]: quit u hacker so u dont ruin my record
Eisenhower: Nuts!
benny~tow: wtf that mean?
Eisenhower: meant to say nutsack lol finger slipped
paTTon: coming to get u hitler u paper hanging hun cocksucker
Stalin: rofl
T0J0: HAHAHHAA
Hitler[AoE]: u guys are ******** gay
Hitler[AoE]: ur never getting in my city
*Hitler[AoE] has been eliminated.*
benny~tow: OMG u noob you killed yourself
Eisenhower: ROFLOLOLOL
Stalin: OMG LMAO!
Hitler[AoE]: WTF i didnt click there omg this game blows
*Hitler[AoE] has left the game*
paTTon: hahahhah
T0J0: WTF my teammates are n00bs
benny~tow: shut up noob
Roosevelt: haha wut a moron
paTTon: wtf am i gunna do now?
Eisenhower: yah me too
T0J0: why dont u attack me o thats right u dont got no ships lololol
Eisenhower: ******** u
paTTon: lemme go thru ur base commie
Stalin: go to hell lol
paTTon: ******** this s**t IM goin afk
Eisenhower: yah this is gay
MacRthr: k back!
*Roosevelt has left the game.*

Hitler[AoE]: wtf?
Eisenhower: s**t now we need some1 to join
*tru_m4n has joined the game.*

tru_m4n: hi all
T0J0: hey
Stalin: sup
Churchill: hi
tru_m4n: OMG OMG OMG i got all his stuff!
tru_m4n: NUKES! HOLY s**t I GOT NUKES
Stalin: d00d gimmie some plz
tru_m4n: no way i only got like a couple
Stalin: omg dont be gay gimmie nuculer secrets
T0J0: wtf is nukes?
T0J0: holy shitholyshithoylshit!
*T0J0 has been eliminated.*
*The Allied team has won the game!*
Eisenhower: awesome!
Churchill: gg noobs no re
T0J0: thats bullshit u ******** suck
*T0J0 has left the game.*
*Eisenhower has left the game.*
Stalin: next game IM not going to be on ur team, u guys didnt help
me for s**t
Churchill: wutever, we didnt need ur help neway dumbass
tru_m4n: l8r all
benny~tow: bye
Churchill: l8r
Stalin: ******** u all
MacRthr: ******** u commie!!!
MacRthr: ur next b***h!
tru_m4n: shut up commie lol
*tru_m4n has left the game.*
benny~tow: lololol u commie
Churchill: ROFL
Churchill: bye commie
*Churchill has left the game.*
*benny~tow has left the game.*
*MacRthr has left the game.*
Stalin: i hate u all fags
*Stalin has left the game.*
paTTon: lol no1 is left
paTTon: weeeee i got a jeep
*paTTon has been eliminated.*
paTTon: o s**t!
*paTTon has left the game.*

Patsy Walker


Ms. Selina Kyle

PostPosted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 1:14 pm


xd
PostPosted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 1:14 pm


Ricochet Rita
Jessica Drew
LOLZ NOWAI T3H N4V3Y PWNXX0RZ AL U LOLWTFX


OMFGIJANE!


oh shut up, N00bz! J3w g07 pAnw3d by ScarL37 And S70rm ShaD0w!!1

Marc_Spector

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