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 Posted: Sun Dec 24, 2006 9:15 am
I wonder how many people actually check this subforum? =/ Anyways, Hi! Those who have checked this forum probably remember the last book I wrote: Swordsmans Chronicles yes? Well that was a fanfic. anyways, i've been nusy thinking, and here's another masterpiece thought up in about 15 minutes while screwing around in Math class.
I'm prepared for all the things you have to say about it, so don't be shy! tell me what you really think! The reason of this posting is to help get me ideas, and inspiration. I'm so excited because I'm going to publish this! Maybe it's a little drastic, but I want to do something big! Anyways, i've got the Characters personalities, and stuff like that. I need names for forests, Caves, Lakes, and others. I also need a mountain name =P However, I have the main story, but I can't tell you any of that, because I got all the spoilers and the beginning thought of (I still need to write it.) Oh yeah, the book is gonna be called Gaia, and it has nothing to do with Gaiaonline xd Now, here are the 3 main characters:
Naore: A girl of the Kimora Clan. She was born with the ability to speak many different languages. She is a priestess in training, and one day she receives a message from the Half angels to go on a pilgrimage.
Loran: An outgoing boy who has a dream: To get out of his town and fight! He has never seen anything outside of his town, since the Mayor fears that the outsiders will destroy the Town. Ges, however, finds a way outside. He does not know, however, that a great destiny lies ahead of him, and does not know the pain and disgust of killing.
Nan: A quiet boy, who is intelligent as he is quiet. He lives in a huge city, and goes to school everyday and is dedicated to school. He does not, however have any friends, just because he is smart. Sometimes, when the teacher asks him a question, he'll try not to answer it, but the teacher threatens to lower his grade. Everyone in the town thinks he's a freak, just because he's intelligent. He is also an orphan with no parents, or relatives, and lives alone on his fathers fortune. However, his feelings break one day and, he runs from home.
I'm very proud of my characters, and if you feel should add something to the story, please do not hesitate! Now, i'm horrid with naming places, like towns and stuff, so any names at all are appreciated. Oh and you guys get to read the chapters! So you get to see my book before anyone else =p! Anyways, you can talk about my book and how I can make it better, or give me side story suggestions. Anyways, enjoy!
All names and some of the story is prone to change, since this is like, the early early stages of my book. I will keep you up to date, if you're interested.
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Posted: Sun Dec 24, 2006 12:32 pm
Wow, that really sounds like you've been working hard on that story, Prince Laharl. I haven't read the Swordsman Chronicles you speak of, but I'd like to. Good luck with your publishing, I can't wait to get to read it.
P.S.
Good for you, math is how you say, blah. cool
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Posted: Sun Dec 24, 2006 1:17 pm
First of all, it's not good to fool around in classes. That could cause bad grades and lack of understanding.
Anyways, it sounds really good. Although, these aren't really the type of books I read, I will still read it because it's going to be written by you. Now, publishing is a hard thing to do. You can get diappointed by the publisher's decision, so don't get your hopes up. I'm not saying you won't, but just don't get too excited yet. I have an idea for a book, which I have had for awhile now, since I was about 10, so it's been 6 years. I thought the title is great, and it's stuck with me ever since. Now I just need to figure out how to write it...LOL. Ayways, keep up the good work, but remember, as your friend, I am telling you that there is a chance they will not publish it. I know people who have sent their books in, and they didn't get published. Just wait and see what happens before you get too excited, okay?
I'll help you later..my hands hurt now. ^_^
~ELLE~
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Posted: Sun Dec 24, 2006 4:04 pm
Sounds like some people around here. Nyao, I think some cool names for places are tamranzian(pronounced tam-ran-zee-in) forsests, the cave of azlickany, the town of nod, and I'll work on a mountain name later.
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Posted: Sun Dec 24, 2006 4:48 pm
heart Great work Onii-san! Those characters sound good. I'm so proud of you.
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Posted: Sun Dec 24, 2006 6:12 pm
Hmm, Mountain name... How about ... "The Peaks of [Insert name I haven't thought of yet] (Lol, I was thinking Glophmere)"
Perfect! heart
I'm looking forward to reading it! heart
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Fashionable Autobiographer
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Posted: Mon Dec 25, 2006 5:44 pm
That sounds hawt. <3
You should name places, mountains and such after guild members XDDD
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Posted: Mon Dec 25, 2006 5:47 pm
Ginhi~kun That sounds hawt. <3
You should name places, mountains and such after guild members XDDD
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Posted: Tue Dec 26, 2006 5:44 pm
I Shall take over and conqure Jaganshiville MWAHAHA! *cough cough* I mean that sounds like a good idea. -^.^-
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Posted: Fri Dec 29, 2006 4:30 pm
Chaosgoslavia.
DENOBABWE.
THE LAHARL TRIANGLE.
BRIEANADA.
Fear MY imagination. heart
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Posted: Fri Dec 29, 2006 4:32 pm
GINHICARAGUA.
MAGELLOLAND?
BLOODSOAKEDORIDA.
SHADOWEDOPOLIS.
:DDDDD
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Posted: Fri Dec 29, 2006 6:47 pm
Chaosfox8888 GINHICARAGUA.
MAGELLOLAND?
BLOODSOAKEDORIDA.
SHADOWEDOPOLIS.
:DDDDD XDDD I love you man heart
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Fashionable Autobiographer
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Posted: Fri Dec 29, 2006 6:59 pm
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Posted: Sun Jan 14, 2007 11:22 am
Update as of 01/14/07
Chapter 1 was written!
Gaia: The beginning
Chapter 1
I sat in my tree, like I do every day. Every day around sundown I sat in this tree,
thinking back through the day and what happened. It's like a little exercise I do to unwind
from the day. Sometimes bad stuff happens, and I just think about it, or maybe it's good and
I don't want to forget it. I have a great memory, especially with events in a day. I don't really
know why, but it's convenient.
I jumped out of the tree and landed perfectly on the ground, and stood up after
the recoil. I practiced acrobatics, since I will be a great warrior one day. The lust to be a
great hero and defeat the bad guys is just something i've always wanted to do.
The town I live in is surrounded by walls, which some call it a barrier, some call it
a prison. I've lived for 17 years in this town, and I don't really know what it's like outside. I
bet it's exciting though.
I looked in the distance and saw a figure running towards me. She had some
strong red hair, and appeared a bit skinny. "Hey Loran you're late for supper again!"
"Sorry, it's just a bad habit! I just have to watch the sundown every day though!
My life would feel incomplete if I didn't" I replied. "You really just love sundowns, don't you?
If you love them so much, why don't you just marry them? Hahaha."
Sophy was my sister, you could say. She's my sister and best friend. Around the
age of 5, my mom was a suspect in a killing. She had good evidence to not kill the man, but
everyone accused her, and she was sentenced to death. I became an orphan for 2 years,
remaining quiet and shutting myself from the world. As an orphan, I had developed skills like
stealing and stealth, but I only stole food I needed. I wanted to leave the town so badly,
since I hated them so much, but I couldn't due to the wall. Around the age of 7 I met a poor
little girl being picked on by the local school bullies. Naturally, my sense of justice kicked in,
and I beat them up. That girl was the 6 year old Sophy.
After that, Sophy and I supported each other for 4 years, until we ran into the
local blacksmith, who is now my father. He took us in, and we've lived with him for 6 years.
I walked side by side with Sophy back into the main part of town. When you
look at the town from quite a distnace, the buildings are quite tall, and you can see all the
hustle and bustle of the local women gossiping, and struggling through a crowd to get that
new deal on a new dress.
The town, which is called Paryo, spans a length of 10 miles, width and length.
It's hugeness is none in the world, or so I read. But we have no books of outside, so I can
only imagine what it's like. We have 2 parts of town. The East is the rich part of town. Also
called the main part of town, alot of our nobles hang around there, and they do noble stuff. I
never really cared what they did to be honest. The West is the poor part of town. Broken
buildings and rotting wooden parts, the west suffers more than anyone else. In fact, it is sad
to say, that 80% of the children in the West are orphans.
The middle of town is where the shops are. That's also where my family lives.
I'm usually at home, helping my dad smith his new sword, or delivering his order. Sophy
does the normal "mom work" and cooks, cleans, among other things. That's how our lives
are lived. We do work, we sell our weapons, we make a profit, we buy materials, and we
repeat this. I really get bored of it very quickly, since it's so repetitive. My father won't teach
me anything about how to fight, since he says i'll never need it.
Sophy and I walked into our front door. Father wasn't home. He was probably
out selling our latest weapons. I sat at the table and started eating, since Father and Sophy
had already eaten. This was normal too. "So did anything good happen today?" "Nah,
nothing out of the ordinary," I replied. "Yeah, nothing special ever happens here. It's soooo
boring!".
"Then why don't you just leave the town?"
"I wish!"
"Hahaha"
"Hehe"
Life was like this everyday. Nothing special, just boring work. I yawned. It was
getting late by now, and the moon was almost almost at it's highest. "Well, i'm heading to
bed," I told Sophy. "Okay, Goodnight!" "G'night".
This was the night that I had that dream. This was the dream. I remember this
dream so well. I was falling into darkness. Just falling, and falling, when I heard a voice: "It is
time. Your destiny is waiting. Will you be there to accept your destiny. accept your fate?" I
had no idea what was going on. The voice faded, and I woke up. The words rang in my
head. I wiped my forehead. I was sweating. The sun was up, and it was time to start
another day.
I went on my morning walk, and it was strange. Everyone was walking like
normal, but it was very quiet. I walked a bit more and everyone was lined up in parade style,
like an audience ready to watch an oncoming parade. Then they came. The soldiers in
armor, like they were ready to destroy our town. This was a normal occurance as well. The
soldiers come to inspect our town, and make sure we're all doing our jobs correctly. They
also make sure that no Rayorans are in power, or have money.
Not only does the town have humans, but also a special race known as
Rayorans. They resemble Humans very well. They lived in a town, which they said had no
name. The Rayorans lived in the West side of the town, and could not, no matter how much
money they had, be a part of the East. It was unfair, but that was law.
The soldiers marched in, like they always did. It was always blah blah blah.
Everything went normally, and then something happened. I would never forget this day. This
day...I remember it well. My Father and Sophy were standing in the crowd of people, since
everyone except Rayorans were to be present. Suddenly, there was a very loud banging on
the main door of town. The banging continued, for 5 minutes. No one knew what it was,
since we all believed the wall and door to be indestructable.
And then, the door burst open, and 4 huge monstrous wolves that looked 12 feet
in size, and had fangs as sharp as swords, started to attack the town. I was in shock, that
something could break that door. If something were that powerful, then I was afraid as to
what would happen. The soldiers didn't see it coming, and a few of them were killed on the
spot without chance to reatliate. The squad sent in was only compiled of about 20 soliders,
since it didn't take many to inspect a town. All the people were running and screaming, and it
was turmoil. I didn't know what to do, so I ran to Father. Father had a sword with him at all
times, and I saw it in his eyes, the burning eyes of a soldier, that he was going to fight.
"No, you can't fight them Father!" I yelled at him to stop. I dind't want him to
die. He didn't hear me and charged into the fray with the soldiers. I grabbed Sophies hand
and ran for the front gate. I didn't look back. I didn't want to. We stopped by the front
gate, unscathed. "Hurry, close the gate! The enemy can't escape!" They were going to close
the gate! I looked around for my father, and he was still there, fighting. "Father!!" I called
out, but he wouldn;t hear me until he defeated his enemy. I could tell.
The gate was closing. All but 3 guards and my father were dead. The streets
were filled with the blood of the innocent, and nobles. The West would be attacked too. he
gate was about to be closed. If we didn't leave now then....I didn't want to think about it.
That's when it happened. Sophy grabbed me (She had alot of strength being that she worked
with a Smith.) and tossed me out of the gate.
I stood up, but I couldn;t squeeze through. "Sophy!!!" I couldn't believe what
was happening! She smiled and said,"I love you, Loran. Never forget our time we had
together." Then the gate closed. I kenw it then. My father, my sister Sophy, all the villagers,
I would never see them again. I broke down and cried. I couldn't move, I could barely
breathe. This went on for about an hour, til I cried myself to sleep.
I woke up in the same place, with the memory still burned in my head. I will
never forget this day. No matter what. I looked at the ground and got a grip of where I was.
On the ground, was a kind of path. I assumed it led to a town, and I had nowhere else I
could go, so I followed it. My journey was just beginning.
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Posted: Mon Jan 15, 2007 5:55 am
Bravo! heart
(MUST BUY OF THE YEAR! 3nodding )
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