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 Posted: Fri Nov 24, 2006 8:59 pm
Xx'ami-da trailed beside Jibanza. He was curious; curious about the klipspringer that they had just encountered.
Why did he see any regret or pain in her eyes. Surely she didn't regret having the fawn.
He shook his head from the thoughts.
"You've grown since I last saw you," X said, with a calm expression. He wondered if the sand colored dog was still shaken from almost killing the mother of the new fawns.
He was trying to keep his cool from the thoughts. He took a deep breath to calm down.
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Posted: Fri Nov 24, 2006 9:05 pm
It had, indeed, been a big day. A new chapter, it seemed, inside the large book of their lives. And today's 'chapter' had been very eventful, at least.
Two new lives. A birthing. Jibanza, almost orphaning two young fawns. X, throwing her off. The mother, not minding, shaking it off.
It had all been too much for Ban.
She was still ashamed... and felt, inside, really bad. Guilt flooded through her body. What had she almost done?
And there was that terrifying feeling, too. She hadn't felt it as much as a pup... but now, it was there. That side of her that lusted for blood. That needed to sink it's fangs into flesh, that longed to tear and rip.
Her ears flicked as X spoke. His voice was distant, and Jibanza didn't even know what to say. It almost seemed like a dream. What did X think of her now?!
"I... have grown," Jibanza nodded, not meeting his gaze, "So have you."
There was awkward silence, and tention.
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Posted: Fri Nov 24, 2006 9:20 pm
X noticed that he was a little... off...
He calmed himself down, almost completly. The eventful day seemed to through him off. But... that one little detail when they were about to leave. That is what shook him.
"Are you okay, Ban?" A simple question. He could tell she was shaken as well. Just... not for the same reasons.
All klipspringers smell the same...
That wasn't true. Ban and Koin smelled different. They were both wild dogs.
He blinked the thought away and looked over to his earthy friend. She wasn't looking at him.
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Posted: Fri Nov 24, 2006 9:28 pm
Jibanza looked up.
"I'm okay," she smiled, but it was a weak one. She tried to give a wag of her tail, or a laugh... anything to convince X that she was alright. But... she couldn't do it. She felt bad. Through and through.
There was a silence, and then Jibanza spoke again.
"X?"
She blushed, scarlet red, and then turned towards the hyena with a jerk of her head. Quickly, she met his eyes. Her own eyes glittered with fear.
"Have you ever... lost control of yourself?"
Jibanza hadn't paid much attention towards the mystery of Chachili's younger fawns. She was too preoccupied with finding out what this new... feeling was.
Bloodlust.
She'd almost killed the klipspringer. And she'd met the animal before. She and those two young fawns...
She didn't think about the fawns. She was too scared about her own mind.
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Posted: Fri Nov 24, 2006 9:40 pm
Xx'ami-da sighed. He didn't believe that she was alright.
"Lost control?" X repeated.
"Can't say I have," he replied. "But..."
He paused for a moment and smiled.
"I get on the verge of loosing control. I try not to. It's hard not to chase and hunt when I smell blood. So don't feel bad. It happens..."
"Besides. No one was hurt..." he replied. "Physically at least."
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Posted: Fri Nov 24, 2006 9:49 pm
Jibanza's eyes lit up a little. She brightened.
"I guess... you're right," she sighed, and then drew closer to X's side. He was comforting. X was the only outsider Ban knew, and the only friend she knew, too. She was even quite distant with her brothers nowadays. They were all growing up, and growing away from eachother...
"I guess I got that same feeling," she breathed, "It was so... so strange. It felt like I was going to snap at her. But it's natural, right?"
It didn't feel natural to Jibanza. It felt... alien. Strange.
But it felt so good. There had been power coursing through her. She shook her head, and turned to X.
"Enough about me," she said, still shakey, "What about you? You seem to be... thinking about something..."
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Posted: Fri Nov 24, 2006 10:03 pm
X smiled at the wild dog brightened up. He felt it was sort of a job to make the purple eyed wild dog happy. His 'job' made him happy. He smiled.
"It is natural. You'll get used to it, and be able to supress it..." he said.
"Thinking?" He repeated. He seemed to repeat things he was about to answer. ((Thinking? X? Psh, no! Never! xD))
"Just some things that happened recently, and from my past..." he said. His past... he tried not to think of his past. He tried not to think of the regret in a mother's voice. He tried.
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Posted: Fri Nov 24, 2006 10:26 pm
"Oh!" Jibanza's eyes widened, and she remembered. The fawns.
Ever since that incident, and leaving the High Grass, X had been silent. And she remembered something. He'd asked the klipspringer a question...
"Who's Kukuru, X?" she was genuinely confused.
The mention of this... stranger, and the klipspringer's attitude towards them had changed. Even X had changed.
"Is this... Kukuru person making you sad?" she narrowed her eyes, and her fangs gleamed, "Because if they are..."
She paused, then straightened.
"Don't think about that kind of depressing stuff, X..."
X had mentioned being alone, many times. But Jibanza still shook her head.
"You're not alone. You've got a pack now, right? Your scent is different, and I can smell others... other scents all over you. Think I didn't notice?" she smiled, " And you've got me, too."
But still, the situation still seemed grim. She looked down at her paws.
"X... what happened while I was away?"
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Posted: Fri Nov 24, 2006 10:40 pm
"Kukuru is a klipsringer. He said his mother abandon him. Just like my mother did," X said. He wouldn't tell her that the light grey klipspringer that he had encountered thought he was a wild dog.
"It's just that..." X paused. "The tone of that Klipspringer... I recall her name was... Chachili, I think...."
He had paused again. "Her tone is what got to me..." he said with a light sigh. He tired not to think of it again.
He smiled at her. Yes... he had a pack... and he had her.
He sighed again. "A lot of things happened. I was taken in by a Seer and her pack. I still wander away from them time to time. I met a Kukuru, and we talked for a while. I changed my name," X said. A few things had happened. Those things changed him. May it have been for the better... or for the worse.
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Posted: Fri Nov 24, 2006 10:56 pm
Jibanza listened, and listened well. Her ears twitched as she heard the news. A new pack. Her suspicions had been right, after all. A name change?
"Does that mean... you're not X anymore?" she asked him, confused. She had no idea of a new name, and whether it was a good thing or a bad thing. She assumed it was a good thing, and gave a wag of her tail.
The little wild dog turned, and she thought she saw a glint of sadness as X talked. He claimed that he didn't mind having been abandoned... but then, there did seem to be a small part of him that might just... mind.
But who was she to think about such things?
"Her tone, huh," she sighed, "Well... I guess there's something up with that preybeast. I've met her before, as well. She's a weird one, that thing. So you're saying that... Kukuru got abandoned?"
She tried to avoid mentioning X's own mother. It was just... too awful to think about.
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Posted: Fri Nov 24, 2006 11:11 pm
"No, I'm still X. One can still shorten my name to such," he smiled.
His past... he may not have been that old... but it was painful.
His mother's voice rang in his mind.
'I didn't want him...'
X tried not to cry. He blinked really hard to force the tears back. Shuddering lightly, he nodded. Yes, Kukuru had been abandoned. He tried to force his mind back to the present. He didn't want to live in the past.
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Posted: Sat Nov 25, 2006 2:04 am
Could boys cry?
Jibanza had never thought so. She, herself, did not cry much... her life was fine, and the last time she'd shed tears was over something little, like losing a rabbit when hunting.
Yet, she had never witnessed a man in her family cry. It seemed... almost like something they swore not to do. Being surrounded by boys, some of this had rubbed off on the wild dog, herself.
But now... X seemed to be upset. And Jibanza couldn't understand it. At once, she felt angry... angry at the mother that had left such a strong boy. She admired X's strength, and optimism... how could someone leave such a son? How could someone leave a hyena like X?
"X..." she pressed closer to his body, and put her paw on his, "Hey, don' worry about it. It's been a big day, huh?"
It seemed like everyone's demons were coming out of the shadows to haunt them today.
"The klipspringer... denied that she had a son by that name. Maybe she wasn't lying. Right X... X? "
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Posted: Sat Nov 25, 2006 12:28 pm
X brushed away the tears that had threatened to fall. A shuddery sigh came from him.
He tried to shake the memories of his mother away. Tried...
It worked a bit. He had supressed his memories for such a long time.
"It has... " he responded.
Stupid shadows of the past, go away! He didn't want the memories, just as his mother didn't want him...
"Maybe..." that was his only reponse. Maybe... just maybe... but... what if...?
That what if...
What if she was trying to hide it...
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Posted: Sat Nov 25, 2006 10:39 pm
A soft lick. Jibanza's tongue pressed tenderly against her friend's fur, from his ears to his muzzle. She often groomed her brothers, from time to time, so this was not unusual behavior...
But, as tomboyish as Ban was, there was a time when she would show her girlish side. Affection for her friend, her to-be travelling companion. She stopped, stepped back, went a little red but gave X a wink and a grin, instead.
"When we go to the jungle, X," she said, feeling stronger, "We'll be able to leave everything behind. Go and find a new place to explore, and maybe... stay there for a while. Find others to talk with. Help eachother hunt. A trip, a weekend away from this dry savannah."
She looked around her at the plains... they were dry, and the earth was hard and cracked beneath them. Maybe, if they went for a holiday of some kind, they could... forget all these worries for a while.
"When we grow stronger, we'll be able to defend ourselves! Until then... we can live for the day that we can leave!"
She kind of felt silly for saying this. She couldn't leave, of course... she still had family, and a pack of her own. But X... he could leave at anytime. He had a pack, sure... but he was stronger than her, in some ways...
She shook her head, and gave a determined nod.
"We're in this together!"
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Posted: Sat Nov 25, 2006 11:20 pm
X blushed lightly as he felt the gentle touch of Ban's tounge against his fur. He grinned at her as she did.
The jungle... A lovely escape. It would be the best escape right now. But he would wait for Ban. They would go there together.
All of X's demons started to melt away again. He smiled.
"Too bad it can't be forever, huh?" he asked, noticing a few key words that she wouldn't be able to stay there forever.
X... he hated walking on the dry savannah. It cracked his paws and made them hard and ruff. But... he also learned not to mind. they didn't hurt, so he guessed it was fine. X shook his head, shaking yet another pointless thought from his head.
He gave her a brisk nod as well. "Together," He agreed firmly.
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