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[Sir D's Concept] ~ Escape Artist (Critiques Please)

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Sir Deranged Reindeer

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PostPosted: Fri Nov 10, 2006 8:42 pm


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Name: Pierre Tonnior
Stage Name: Poisson (French word for fish, not pronouced like 'poison'. biggrin )
Age: 24
Sex: Male
Title: L'artiste d'évasion (The Escape Artist)

What he does:Escapologist. biggrin Specialises in underwater escapes, but also does handcuffs, rope, etc. Prefers to rely on his flexibility and ablity to pick locks for his escapes, rather than using trick locks, or rigged handcuffs.

World and Past? From World A, around 1928. Pierre was born in France, but moved to England with his parents when he was still very young. He speaks English well, having attended a British school, however, he does have an accent, which he picked up from his parents.

His parents were just the average sort, middle class, unremarkable careers, and thus, they didn't expect too much from their son. Pierre never had much pressure put on him at school to do well, and got average marks, prefering to socialise instead of study. Pierre dropped out after his tenth year, becoming an apprentice of a local handman, who fancied himself as a bit of a locksmith.

After doing things for him during his late teenage years, Pierre is good with locks, and other DIY sort of things. He enjoys making things himself, rather than buying, or hiring a proffessional.

Pierre is an only child, and enjoyed being around friends more than family, as a pack of teenage boys were more approving of his escapes, and more willing to tie him up than his family ever were. His friends, however, unlike his parents, were not too interested in the safety aspect of escapes, and Pierre has found himself in a few awkward situations during his time. When he was 17, he managed to get locked in a less than roomy box for four hours, and was slightly delerious for the few days afterwards. Although he's had more mishaps than he'd like to admit, Pierre doesn't advertise his downfalls. He's always eager to impress, and doesn't like to admit to failure.

He first discovered his lock picking talents when he and his friends managed to get themselves locked in a storeroom at school, in third form. Having always had a fascination with Harry Houdini, Pierre was soon convincing his friends and family to tie him to chairs, or handcuff him - performing simple escapes for them. Being a Houdini fan, he was eager to try the famous Escapologist’s ‘Chinese Water Torture Cell’ and ‘Milk Can’ escapes. After trying these for himself, Pierre found a particular attraction to these water-bases escapes, and can now proudly hold his breath for just over 4 minutes. One day, he hopes to break the world record for longest time holding your breath underwater. (The human record, at least)

After Houdini's death two years prior (1926), Pierre is also hoping that he can become as famous and escapologist as his childhood hero.

Personality:Having been adept at lock picking since he was a kid, Pierre definitely has a mischievous side to him. He enjoys it when people appreciate a good escape, but the prospect of failure always lingers in the back of his mind, which makes him edgy and nervous before shows. He prefers the company of other’s over the company of himself, and will often cling like a limpet to the first person that he takes a liking to.

When around others, he can be quite outgoing, and tries his best to crack a few jokes here and there - Pierre has an almost desperate need to fit in, and be liked by people. If left to himself, he tends to over think things, making him slightly paranoid and jumpy.

If someone pushes him away, or gives the impression that they don't enjoy his company, Pierre tends to blame himself, and worries about if it was something he did, or if it was something he said; in essense, over analysing the situation. After his best attempts at salvaging any sort of friendship with someone, he moves on quickly, which makes him seem a little cold, but he really means the best.

He doesn't like being around people that don't like him, as it makes him feel uncomfortable, and bad about himself. Pierre needs people to compliment him and reassure him in order to keep up in self-esteem.

Appearance:He’s around 5’11” tall, and slightly thinner than most. He has dark, short auburn hair, and green eyes. Pierre can normally be seen fairly casual clothing, typical of the 1920s. When not performing, he likes to wear his Ivy cap.

During most performances, those involving water, he's seen wearing a men's one-piece bathing suit, with red and white stripes.

There's nothing particularly remarkable about his appearance. ...For now, at least.

References: 1920's clothing, Ivy Cap, Chinese Water Torture Cell, Milk Can Escape.

Quick Painting of Costume, drawn by The Pie. XD

Poisson and Cirque du Coeur Torve: If he successfully attains a job at Cirque, it will be his first experience with performing in front of people he doesn't know personally. ...And his first time ever doing escapes in front of a large crowd.

Pierre hopes that when he first joins, he can help out with setting up other acts, as he's alright with construction and fixing things - having made his own boxes and such to escape from in the past. Pierre isn't afraid of a little hard work.

Other: 'The FIRST static record (for holding your breath underwater) was 6'29", Georges Pouliquin from France, the 3th November 1912 in Paris'. I'm assuming this is what the record was in Pierre's time.

However, the current official record is 8 minutes and 58 seconds.

We're talking about humans here. ;D
PostPosted: Sat Nov 11, 2006 5:29 am


The french are taking over!

I really like this idea. His talent is rather original! I can't really think of anything to change.

There's already another concept with a 20-minute record. Good luck.

Silverah

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Sir Deranged Reindeer

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PostPosted: Sat Nov 11, 2006 7:05 pm


Silverah
The french are taking over!

I really like this idea. His talent is rather original! I can't really think of anything to change.

There's already another concept with a 20-minute record. Good luck.


They're fishy though. D': Haha. Rabid's little man is from world B, so shh. XD

Haha. Thankyou. And yes. French. I'm terrible at french, too.
PostPosted: Sat Nov 11, 2006 7:12 pm


I'm just commenting on how there are numerous french characters so far. :3

Ok, technically mine's Italian. But she's Franciscan Empire Italian. sweatdrop

And yes. Fishy's record doesn't count.

Human record, then?

Silverah

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PostPosted: Sat Nov 11, 2006 7:25 pm


Silverah
I'm just commenting on how there are numerous french characters so far. :3

Ok, technically mine's Italian. But she's Franciscan Empire Italian. sweatdrop

And yes. Fishy's record doesn't count.

Human record, then?


Sounds good to me. XD

lol. French is an easy nationality to do, I guess?
PostPosted: Sun Nov 12, 2006 4:29 am


Sir Deranged Reindeer
Silverah
I'm just commenting on how there are numerous french characters so far. :3

Ok, technically mine's Italian. But she's Franciscan Empire Italian. sweatdrop

And yes. Fishy's record doesn't count.

Human record, then?


Sounds good to me. XD

lol. French is an easy nationality to do, I guess?


French has lots of circusses.
Do you remember the Madeline book where she and Pepito join the circus and get sewn into a lion costume together?:

Silverah

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 12, 2006 4:36 am


Silverah
Sir Deranged Reindeer
Silverah
I'm just commenting on how there are numerous french characters so far. :3

Ok, technically mine's Italian. But she's Franciscan Empire Italian. sweatdrop

And yes. Fishy's record doesn't count.

Human record, then?


Sounds good to me. XD

lol. French is an easy nationality to do, I guess?


French has lots of circusses.
Do you remember the Madeline book where she and Pepito join the circus and get sewn into a lion costume together?:


Ohman. Yes.

I used to have all the Madeline books, and watch that cartoon when I was a kid. XD;;
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2006 10:49 am


An escapologist! Score <3. If I hadn't done a sharpshooter I would've gone with an escape artist. It's nice that you make his talents mostly water-based, as it leaves other folks with room to play with the talent as well. I like him too biggrin . I don't have any specific critiques, except that I feel he deserves a lot more fleshing out. As it is this seems to be more notes than an actual character description, and a lot of important aspects of his personality and history aren't mentioned. Here are some questions you can answer to springboard into more character depth:

History:
Was he born into an affluent family? How did they treat him? Any siblings? Did his family approve of his less that conventional hobbies? Did he ever get trapped doing an escape and need to be saved? Was he a good student? Did his need to learn more about escapology interefere with his studies at all?

Etc. The more depth a character has, the better! Don't be afraid to give your character a detailed history, since it is history that shapes your character >3.

Personality:
How does he interact with people who don't appreciate his clingyness? If he does fail, does it spiral him into depression? Besides escapology what else does he like? I like that you made him a nervous performer, by the way. How intelligent is he though? Is he an optimist, a pessimist?

Etc. Personality is the meat and potatoes of your character, and is where you should invest the most time in my opinion. You've got a good start here, but there should be at least two paragraphs to a personality if you ask me, since it's such a complex and multi-faceted entity >3.

If you decide to add more detail I'll happily look over this again and give you another critique biggrin . I really think you're on the right track, it just needs more depth.

Puchiko

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 26, 2006 12:45 pm


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 28, 2006 1:04 am


Puchiko
An escapologist! Score <3. If I hadn't done a sharpshooter I would've gone with an escape artist. It's nice that you make his talents mostly water-based, as it leaves other folks with room to play with the talent as well. I like him too biggrin . I don't have any specific critiques, except that I feel he deserves a lot more fleshing out. As it is this seems to be more notes than an actual character description, and a lot of important aspects of his personality and history aren't mentioned. Here are some questions you can answer to springboard into more character depth:

History:
Was he born into an affluent family? How did they treat him? Any siblings? Did his family approve of his less that conventional hobbies? Did he ever get trapped doing an escape and need to be saved? Was he a good student? Did his need to learn more about escapology interefere with his studies at all?

Etc. The more depth a character has, the better! Don't be afraid to give your character a detailed history, since it is history that shapes your character >3.

Personality:
How does he interact with people who don't appreciate his clingyness? If he does fail, does it spiral him into depression? Besides escapology what else does he like? I like that you made him a nervous performer, by the way. How intelligent is he though? Is he an optimist, a pessimist?

Etc. Personality is the meat and potatoes of your character, and is where you should invest the most time in my opinion. You've got a good start here, but there should be at least two paragraphs to a personality if you ask me, since it's such a complex and multi-faceted entity >3.

If you decide to add more detail I'll happily look over this again and give you another critique biggrin . I really think you're on the right track, it just needs more depth.


Haha. Now that I'm back from my week of holidaying, and I'm finished school, I have lots of time to flesh him out. biggrin And I've got some ideas that I'm working on, that'll hopefully be up here soon. (:

Sir Deranged Reindeer

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Sir Deranged Reindeer

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 30, 2006 5:06 pm


Added things to his personality and history, hopefully making him a bit more or a well-rounded charater. I'd love to get a bit more advice on the things I've added. (:
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