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 Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2006 1:21 pm
I've given this a lot of thought and I've decided that even if I married a man, I would still want a civil union as opposed to a marriage. The primary reason being that marriage is religious and civil unions are legal. I would not want religion playing any factor whatsoever because a) my odds of finding a hot Wiccan are not really that good and b) I don't know what a "wiccan" wedding is like and I don't want anything creepy and c) no one else in my family is Wiccan.
We could run it our way; write our own vows (which I think would mean more to me), have no guidelines for the ceremony, just go all-out creative!
The matter of where to have it is tough. I suppose outside would be best. It would be in autumn and there'd be an wicker arch with flowers in it and that whole bit.
But I digress. What do you think of me having a civil union with a guy?
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Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2006 1:59 pm
Marriages technically aren't religious, the highly religious folks in America have simply commandeer'ed it.
However, if you're looking at it from a Wiccan perspective, look up handfasting. I know a few couples who have been handfasted.
In any case, I see no problem with m/f civil unions.
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Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2006 2:04 pm
I don't like the concept of civil unions for anyone. My entire life I have known marriage to be a completely secular thing, which it is. It's a legal institution with the same name as a religious ceremony which can also be a nonreligious ceremony. All the laws are about marriage not civil unions... I mean if marriage was PURELY religious, my parents would not be married because they are of different faiths. (My mom is Jewish and my dad is Catholic. I feel like a jew most of the time.) That's my opinion.
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Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 8:12 am
At the end of the day, I feel that you should do that which you feel to be right for you. If you would prefer to have a civil union as opposed to a civil marriage then that is up to you and your partner. Whatever choice you make though, you have my best wishes.
I do understand your point on marriage having the stereotype of being primarilly religious, and I absolutely aggree with your reasonings for the Civil Union as opposed to the marriage. However, I don't feel that the fact that it is primarilly a religious ceremony should put you off marriage, if that is your only concern with it.
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Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 6:52 pm
Nanaki Wolf At the end of the day, I feel that you should do that which you feel to be right for you. If you would prefer to have a civil union as opposed to a civil marriage then that is up to you and your partner. Whatever choice you make though, you have my best wishes.
I do understand your point on marriage having the stereotype of being primarilly religious, and I absolutely aggree with your reasonings for the Civil Union as opposed to the marriage. However, I don't feel that the fact that it is primarilly a religious ceremony should put you off marriage, if that is your only concern with it. Yay thats exactly what I was thinking, but I'm not always good with words >.< Anyways I agree with Wolf Whole heartedly ^^
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Posted: Wed Sep 27, 2006 7:06 am
To me, a wedding ceremony isn't a religious affair. Sure, it's done with a religious leader reading off a standardized scripture, but one doesn't have to be religious to undergo the process. I see it as a way to make it feel more spcecial and significant. I'm not really religious (although my girlfriend wants me to become a mormon with her, but she isn't pushing it, thankfully), but I'd want to have a wedding ceremony. It's just a special occasion and shouldn't matter if you're religious or not.
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Posted: Wed Sep 27, 2006 2:41 pm
Andrewsarchus in space I know a few couples who have been handfasted.
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Posted: Wed Sep 27, 2006 4:44 pm
Karnell Sure, it's done with a religious leader reading off a standardized scripture. Not really...Lawyers can... also just about anyone can be certified to preside over a wedding. I know for a fact that the manager of the New York Rangers can... I'm kinda related to him that's how I know but yeah... it's not always a religious person.
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Posted: Wed Sep 27, 2006 4:50 pm
BakaTulip Karnell Sure, it's done with a religious leader reading off a standardized scripture. Not really...Lawyers can... also just about anyone can be certified to preside over a wedding. I know for a fact that the manager of the New York Rangers can... I'm kinda related to him that's how I know but yeah... it's not always a religious person. A Captain of a boat can, so long as they're off at sea.
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Posted: Wed Sep 27, 2006 7:53 pm
BakaTulip Karnell Sure, it's done with a religious leader reading off a standardized scripture. Not really...Lawyers can... also just about anyone can be certified to preside over a wedding. I know for a fact that the manager of the New York Rangers can... I'm kinda related to him that's how I know but yeah... it's not always a religious person. Very True Baka, Kohki too, marriage is not something that any one religion can say "HEY WE PWNZORZ JOO" about ^^ (If my brief use of 1337speak offends anyone I apologize T.T )
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Posted: Sun Oct 01, 2006 9:23 am
Personally, I really don't like the idea of marriage because I don't like the idea of divorce. (I don't know why, but I never wanna get divorced. It's just, like, a phobia.) I would much rather get a civil union. And I agree that "marriage" as our concept of it today tends to be of a man and a woman participating in a Christian ceremony. Of course, there are alternative types, but that, again, is the more traditional version.
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Posted: Wed Oct 04, 2006 6:16 am
SHHH! Stop correcting me. <_<
I probably should have said "often done".
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Posted: Sun Dec 17, 2006 9:40 pm
look into civil unions vs marriages more as far as the legality goes. You can lose LOTS of rights under the civil union. The state can at any time revoke the legalization of a civil union and you would lose any rights that you thought you had. With a marriage they cannot...rather would not, do that.
Marriage in itself is NOT religious. All religions have marriages. it is the type of ceremony that is religious. My fiance and I are thinking about getting a marriage license instead of the ceremony...mostly because of the cost and mostly because neither of us identify ourselves as Christian.
Please do a bit more research before making your final decision. I don't want you to lose you rights!
(also, this reminded me of an ammendment that went through a while back ago in Michigan. I scoff at Michigan-ians for being illiterate, and at the legislature for being sly. They put out an ammendment to "Ban Gay Marriage". In all actuality, if one READ the actual ammendment, they would have realized that they would no longer recognize even straight couples living together without a marriage license. Those who were living together without the license lost health benefits from their significant other as well as many other rights. I hope they are happy with what they did to themselves...I expected better of them.)
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