Welcome to Gaia! ::

I've been getting lazy about reading fanfics, but since this was short I gave it a read. Overall, I think it's a pretty good introductory chapter, and I like that you're using the 1st Doctor, since most fanfics these days seem to be about either the 9th or 10th (for understandable reasons). I'm guessing Firestorm will be similar to your RP character, so that should be fun. Looking forward to seeing what the story is about!

I think everyone got sort of busy because of school and stuff, so most of the RP's have been going a lot slower than they did in the summer. The Time and Space RP is probably dead, but you could join one of the others, or start a new thread to find out how many people would be interested in joining a new RP. If you do that, it's probably a good idea to come up with some sort of theme for the RP.

I like it. Hartnell is one of my pocket people though, so thats a very biased opinion. smile

He makes me think of my grandpa, and that makes me smile.

Prologue

(note, these events take place before chapter 1. Im afraid this fanfiction is not in the right order. Read and review?)

He didn’t want to do this. There were a thousand things he would rather be doing right now. He didn’t want to think about the consequences if he was caught. Holding his breath, he noiselessly slid the stolen key card into the slot. The light on the electronic lock slid from red to green. So far so good. Now for the password. If he got this wrong, security would be alerted of the unauthorised entry, and he would instantly have failed. Sweating slightly with nerves, he keyed in the password, the one he hoped would open the door. With a satisfying hum, the door slid open. He let out the breath he had been holding in a sigh of relief.

The room he was in was only dimly lit, but he increased the light power up to maximum. His eyes slid the length of the room, studying its contents. When he looked at its centre he gasped out loud. In the centre of the room, from floor to ceiling was a stasis chamber. Floating in the chamber, apparently asleep, was a young girl. His eyes darkened in anger. It was a lie. It had all been a lie. The old man had been right when he told him what was in this room. He had seen many horrific things done to animals, dumb creatures that had no proper feelings. But to experiment on a human? And a child at that! He gritted his teeth. When he got out of here he would expose what had been going on. But first of all he would make Cronus feel all the pain and suffering that he had caused to his ‘subjects’.

Hurry David! You don’t have much time left! The voice caught David off guard. It was the voice of the old man who had persuaded him to do this task. He was right. He had to focus. Sprinting over to the control panel next to the stasis chamber, he keyed in the chamber realise code, the one the old man had given him. He backed away as the room vibrated slightly with realised power. The stasis chamber lit up, the stasis field slowly draining away. The girl slowly descended to the floor of the chamber. David activated the control that should have started the chamber sliding upwards, realising the occupant inside. To his horror, the mechanism jammed. Feverishly he pressed the button, but it was no good. The mechanism whined in protests to his actions, as it was still jammed. Then a new noise started up, quite different from the hum of powered machinery, and the protests of the jammed mechanism. It was a wheezing, groaning kind of noise, like an engine that was so old; it was beginning to wear out. There was a flicker in the air, and then a tall solid shape formed itself, out of thin air. The engine sound stopped. David’s mouth dropped open. Where before there had just been metal cabinets, there was now a tall narrow blue box, with the words ‘Public call Box’ written at the top.

A slight sound from the centre of the room drew his attention back to the stasis field. What he saw made his blood run cold. The girl was now awake. Glowing amber eyes, slitted like a cat and with no whites, only that fiery amber, glared into his, almost paralysing him with the intensity of the girl’s feelings. He backed away in fear. There was a sudden furious hammering on the door of the room. Fortunately he had remembered to lock it behind him when he had entered the room. The Security forces! He felt rising panic begin to take hold of him. Then the door of the blue box behind him swung open. The voice of the old man inside it penetrated his confusion.
“Come David! We have to get out of here!”
“But the girl-“
“There is nothing we can do for her! Do you have any idea how much power that child contains?! She can easily free herself. But if she does, it will destroy this entire building! Do you want to be inside when it goes up?”
David sighed.
“Alright, but I do want to see what becomes of her.”
“You will do. Now come on!” David allowed himself to be pulled into the box by the old man. Angrily, he ripped off his Cronus Incorporated badge. He knew that he would never return here, and that his status as a Junior Engineer was now over. The only reason he had been able to complete this task was that he was a trusted and hardworking employee. In fact, the manager had been too trusting, carelessly allowing him access to where the senior staff kept their keys…

yeah, also David is going to keep popping up. The main villain is actually gonna be Cronus, the boss of Cronus Incorperated.

I like the dialog, it's pretty consistent with the way the First Doctor and his companions sounded, especially in the beginning of the show, when you never really trusted that the Doctor was doing everything he could to get Ian and Barbara back home.

Firestorm prefers to be called Firestorm instead of Louise?

Wayhey! Chapter 3! thank you to those who have reviewed so far, particularly to Hairy Priest! Reviews people!

Chapter 3

Firestorm followed Susan along what seemed like endless corridors, all with identical white walls with circles in them. After around twenty minutes or so, Susan stopped at a white door. Opening it, she waved Firestorm inside and followed her in. Once she was inside, Firestorm simply stopped dead and gaped at what lay within. The floor was covered in a soft scarlet carpet, which Firestorm could feel was soft, even through the soles of her boots (or perhaps that wasn’t surprising: the soles of her boot were so thin that she would be able to feel the surface of any floor). The walls and every item of furniture was painted in various shades of red, and when Firestorm tipped her head back to look at the ceiling, she saw that a magnificent picture had been painted on it. Her eyes widened as she followed the story that was being played out in the picture. To her amazement, she saw herself in the picture. In many scenes she was fighting shadowy monsters and nightmarish creatures. She seemed to be fighting them with a sword in some places, which burned with magical flames. In others she was fighting with claws and fire. She gasped when she saw that. It was as if the painting was mapping out her life and somehow knew some of her most closely guarded secrets. An enormous red dragon appeared in the centre of the ceiling, with narrowed eyes and an expression of fury on its scaly face.

She jerked with shock as Susan slipped an arm through hers.
“Did I make you jump? Sorry. I didn’t mean to”. She smiled fondly at her, seeming amused by Firestorm’s bewilderment over this magnificent room.
“It’s…it’s exactly the same as the room I’ve always dreamed about having! The only thing I never thought of was the painting”
Susan smiled again.
“There is one thing I should explain, the TARDIS is actually alive. Although Grandfather does not believe me”.
A small frown crossed her face as she said this.
“The TARDIS knew what room you would most like to have, and decorated it accordingly. As for the painting… it seems as if the TARDIS has taken things from your mind. But I also think that it was more than the TARDIS that created it. There are some scenes from your future, as well as your past. I don’t know what force it is or its purpose.”

At this moment the Doctor walked in. Smiling at the girls, he put a hand on Firestorm’s shoulder, squeezing lightly. She accepted this caress with caution, as she did not like people to touch her. She trusted Susan, so didn’t mind her playful nudges. She cautiously took the Doctor’s hand in hers, and the Doctor flashed her a fond smile, much the same as Susan’s. The Doctor spoke with a soft and gentle voice in her head. So you are beginning to overcome the barriers that years of mistreatment caused you to erect. Understand that not any of us would even dream of hurting you. You are our responsibility now, and I care for you and love you like I would Susan. Firestorm’s mental voice was nervous and almost strangled with suppressed tears. L-love? You really love me Doctor? The tears flowed freely now, obscuring her vision. The Doctor’s smile grew even fonder, and he slipped a gentle arm around her shoulders. But of course! You really think I would put on an act? No, I really do love you, like you were my granddaughter. It is clear that you have not had much love, kindness or happiness in your life, so we will now try to provide as much as possible, to make up for what you have not had. He carefully wiped her tears away with a handkerchief taken from the pocket of his trousers. Firestorm smiled as well, and then burst into tears again.
“I-im s-sorry…I-m just so h-happy…n-no one’s ever treated me this way before”. The Doctor gently put his arms round her, rocking her and murmuring soothing words until she stopped crying.
“It’s alright Firestorm…we understand how you are feeling. It must be a shock for you to be treated with kindness, instead of people shouting at you and trying to hurt you. Now, let us get back to the console room, we have materialised”.
He, Susan and Firestorm trooped out of the wondrous bedroom, and Firestorm shut the door. However, as she was turning away, some overwhelming inner instinct told her that she must mark her territory. Without even realising she was doing it, she placed a finger against the door, and concentrated until what looked like a small flame flickered on it. She traced the words ‘Firestorm’s Room’ on the door. Where her finger touched, glowing fiery lines appeared flickering at irregular intervals like a real fire. The Doctor stared at her and then said in her mind That was remarkable child! Where did you learn to do that? Appearing to sense her slight fear, the Doctor calmed her slightly saying I don’t mind about the door, it was almost as if those words were meant to be there. Very creative. Smiling again, he led the way back to the console room.

When they got to the console room, Ian and Barbara were already there, putting on coats. The Doctor handed one to Firestorm, and opened the doors by flicking a switch on the console. Firestorm was intrigued, and filed the switch away in her head as the one used to open the door. The Doctor smirked, as he knew exactly what she was doing. He knew that it was not that easy to control the ship. A switch that opened the door one day could materialise the ship the next. The TARDIS was a lot more complicated than Firestorm was thinking. As the Doctor closed and locked the doors, Firestorm looked around at the place that they had materialised in. It was a place that looked very much like the land she used to live in. The TARDIS was standing in the middle of a gravel drive, where a car was parked close to the door of a garage. Firestorm gazed at the house in front of them, to the others it was no bigger than a normal detached house, but to Firestorm it was almost a palace. The white front door was flung open and a young man stood there, beaming at the TARDIS crew almost as if he was expecting them. Firestorm realised with a jolt that he had, she remembered that the Doctor had said something about someone setting up a homing beacon. The young man walked towards the Doctor, hand outstretched and shook the Doctor’s hand enthusiastically.
“How wonderful to see you Doctor! Have you been to any interesting places recently?”
The man appeared to think about this for a moment.
“What am I saying?! Of course you have!” Catching sight of the TARDIS in the drive, he complained
“Doctor! How am I meant to get the car out now? Oh well. I shall have to walk”
The Doctor tittered and poked David’s stomach with his cane.
“Bad luck David! Well at least you can lose a few pounds from that chubby frame of yours!”
David frowned, muttering
“Oh leave off Doctor!” but Firestorm could see the twinkle in his eyes, and knew that he was only pretending to be angry. David greeted Susan, Ian and Barbara as enthusiastically as he had the Doctor, and it was obvious to Firestorm that they were old friends. She felt very awkward and out of place, and hung back slightly as David greeted Susan with a kiss and a bear-like hug. Lastly David turned to Firestorm, and his eyes widened in shock as he recognised her as the girl he had freed several years ago.
“My God!” he breathed.
“Can it be...?” Firestorm stared at him, recognising him as the man who had freed her and seemed her only friend in that hated laboratory. Suddenly, some of the traumatic memories that she had tried to suppress came back full force, and she cried out in pain and desperation, clutching her head as she began to experience them all over again…