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Posted: Wed Aug 16, 2006 8:26 pm
Here you go, story time. I will be posting the story in installments now. Feel free to criticize and comment. Tell me what you like, what you dislike.... You know, whatever.
THIS IS A SCI FI YURI STORY. IF YOU ARE NOT INTERESTED IN THIS GENRE, TURN BACK NOW.
Edit:Tacking on a PG-13 rating here for gore and fight scenes
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Posted: Wed Aug 16, 2006 8:28 pm
I remember the day they came. The day the filthy beasts descended from our skies. Their troops were sent to the ground for what they called “the Cleansing.” In our terms, it was the annihilation of the human race. That was the day I was born.
My name is….. was Zina. Now I am known only as a mistake. A twisted parody of human life. I didn’t ask to be their savior, I didn’t ask for them to do this to me. But they never were concerned with how we common folk felt. We weren’t rich. We weren’t scientists. All I wanted was a little extra money, a little boost to help me out. I was young…. Stupid.
Then again, they never did tell me exactly what they were going to do to me. Said they were going to run a few tests, that was all. Then I’d get my hundred bucks and get to go home.
But scientists have never been known to keep their word, have they?
When I woke the next morning, I was no longer human. I was no longer Zina, but was something other. My memories were gone. I could remember so little about who I was… But it didn’t matter. Who I was had no relevance to what I had become.
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Posted: Wed Aug 16, 2006 11:03 pm
They named me a threat then. I was too strong, too fast, too powerful to exist. But I had cost too much to destroy. So they put me into a detention cell. I was there for countless days, sleeping my life away. There was nothing else to do. I don’t know how long I was there. The days ran together. There were no events that stand out in my mind, save one. I remember that last day well.
I had been asleep when I first heard the voices.
“Find the binds.”
“Will they be strong enough?”
“They have to be, we have nothing stronger.” They were whispering, but I could hear them in my sleep. I realized they must have enhanced my hearing when they changed me.
“Quick, before she wakes up.” They didn’t seem to realize I was already waking, my body slowly rousing itself to find out what was happening. Unfortunately, it was not fast enough. I could feel the cold shackles against my skin, and growled. I heard gasps and shouts for backup as they realized I was awake. I struggled, but, still being half asleep, they had me restrained easily.
Soon enough, they had me blindfolded and loaded onto a boat. I knew it was a boat only from the scent of saltwater and the rocking sensation I felt once the motor had started. It traveled quickly, and I prayed that they were taking me somewhere I could run free again. I missed the feel of grass beneath my feet, wind in my hair, blowing the long reddish strands into my face, the scent of a fresh breeze….
My prayers were not answered.
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Posted: Thu Aug 17, 2006 12:44 am
... confusing, you have alot of ideas going that's for sure. Her being born that day, rembering it, giving herself to science, being a savior, being too powerful, not remembering anything.. it was a bit much, even if you plan on explaining later it leaves you readers confused and not really wanting to continue... not that I'd know from personal experience.. lots of personal experience *cough* *cough* Other then that I really liked it, I am sure it will be interesting and your writing style flows rather nicely. Please say you have this all written already! It kills me when people get you hooked then abandon it cause they get bored or haven't written even the basic event line out... also something I have never done sweatdrop But I cant wait till you post more'z whee
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Posted: Thu Aug 17, 2006 1:29 am
dragon_nymph ... confusing, you have alot of ideas going that's for sure. Her being born that day, rembering it, giving herself to science, being a savior, being too powerful, not remembering anything.. it was a bit much, even if you plan on explaining later it leaves you readers confused and not really wanting to continue... not that I'd know from personal experience.. lots of personal experience *cough* *cough* Other then that I really liked it, I am sure it will be interesting and your writing style flows rather nicely. Please say you have this all written already! It kills me when people get you hooked then abandon it cause they get bored or haven't written even the basic event line out... also something I have never done sweatdrop But I cant wait till you post more'z whee I actually don't have anymore written yet.... sweatdrop But I have the concept layed out for a long while, so there's a lot more story still coming. Sorry that it's confusing. I'm going to clear it all up later, I like to be confusing at first. You say people give up. In my experience, it draws most people in because they want to know what happens and want to see what it all means. Thanks for the comment, though. Readers will make it easier for me to keep writing this one to the end.
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Posted: Thu Aug 17, 2006 1:56 am
gonk You don't have anymore written yet.... NOOOOOooooo I mean, I figured you probaly didn't have it ALL written but maybe half? eek It will be soo long between updates crying Thats it. I shall attach myself to you and beg for updates... Not literaly. My friend did that to me once, and my leg still hurts.
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Posted: Thu Aug 17, 2006 2:05 am
Sorry..... At least I write pretty fast..... I'll try to get at least one a day, okay?
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Posted: Thu Aug 17, 2006 2:10 am
SporkLazer Sorry..... At least I write pretty fast..... I'll try to get at least one a day, okay? 3nodding whee
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Posted: Thu Aug 17, 2006 8:32 pm
(Only update for tonight. I was busy all day, sorry)
I lived in the cold metal prison for a long while. They had taken me to a floating island in hopes that it would keep me from others. I had a keeper, and a jail cell. He was under strict orders to never let me out. And he followed his orders; probably ex-military.
It was from him I learned the news of the outside world. He came twice a day, once at sunrise and once at sunset. He brought me food, if it could be so called. Then, if he was in a good mood, I managed to pull the news from him.
But that food… I’ll remember that food for the rest of my life. It was little more than a slop, an orange liquid you could chew. I guess it was healthy, though, because I lived through my time there, however long it was. I was well used to the filthy swill by the tine me and my keeper had our first conversation.
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Posted: Fri Aug 18, 2006 8:25 pm
Ugh.... I know I said I'd try to update everyday... But my life just kinda blew up, so it might be a few days. So sorry. sweatdrop
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Drunken Chibi Wolfwood Vice Captain
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Posted: Sat Aug 19, 2006 1:33 pm
SporkLazer Ugh.... I know I said I'd try to update everyday... But my life just kinda blew up, so it might be a few days. So sorry. sweatdrop -pats your head- Take your time.
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Posted: Sun Aug 27, 2006 4:41 pm
Sorry about the hiatus, guys. I'm going to be a junior in HS tommorrow, and I found out about a huge AP summer assignment about a week ago. Now thaat it's done, though, I'll be putting up updates. One's coming soon, and I might get more than one up tonight.
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Posted: Sun Aug 27, 2006 5:11 pm
(Whoo, the grand re-opening!)
“Slop for ye, mutant.” He cackled, his voice rough and his breath foul. The orange liquid splashed into my bowl, as always spilling onto my hands. I withdrew into the corner as usual, hunched around the bowl as I tried to stomach it’s foul contents. Usually, the large man just left, but this day was different. This day, he sat and stared. So, I decided to stare back, and finally get a good look at him.
The man was, as I have said, quite large. But I had never noticed how much of his bulk was muscle before. I had assumed he was just obese. But now I saw that, under his loose and filthy encrusted clothing, he must be quite a strong man.
His clothing wasn’t the only filthy thing about him. His skin sagged, and was a pasty grey color. I could see pockmarks and scars as well as small discolored patches over every piece of visible flesh. His hair was a whispy grey and red and had thinned to almost non-existence on his scalp, though it was still abundant across his arms, and I assumed his legs and back, though I couldn’t see them.
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Posted: Mon Aug 28, 2006 9:44 pm
(Ugh.... AP classes suck.... But here's some story anyway)
I’m not sure what put me off my meal more, him, or the meal itself, but I was unable to finish. I set aside my mostly empty bowl with a sigh. I curled up afterwards, as always, ready to just sleep. I was surprised when he spoke.
“Yer too skinny as it is.” He rasped. I lifted my head, my eyes narrowed, looking at the grotesque man.
“Excuse me?” I asked softly. He had never spoken to me besides a grunt of greeting or the occasional jab.
“Yer too skinny.” He repeated, standing and walking to the bars. He held them tightly in his large hands, just leering at me. I drew back self consciously, tugging my dirty clothes around me. They were mere tatters by now. No one had bothered to give me another set.
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Posted: Wed Aug 30, 2006 9:24 pm
“I did not ask for your opinion…” I said softly, still confused and a bit shocked. This man had always seemed the silent type. I thought he would be offended by my words, but he just laughed.
“Come on, pretty little thing.” He rasped again, grinning as he eyed me. I felt dirty and exposed, but could do little about it. “Give us a kiss. I’ll tell you a story if ye do.” I refused, and he just chuckled. “I’ll tell ye the story anyway.” He backed up and sat on his stool again. I was mildly interested, and listened as he began to talk.
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