|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Thu Sep 23, 2004 7:38 am
This thread is a request. I used to live with a room mate named John. I have so many stories of him, and people always ask to hear them. I figure I'll add one or two every day or so. Feel free to add comments or stories as well. Most of these will be sex bloopers. I will keep it within the Tos, and I ask that you please do the same.
Thank you.
onlydraven heart
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Sep 23, 2004 7:41 am
Here's the First one.
Once, John and his girlfriend were having sex. They were getting kind of "energetic," when all of a sudden, the bed rolled away from the wall. They fell off and she hit her head on the end table. She had blood pouring from the open wound.
John, being the gentleman he is, continued hitting it for another minute or so untill he "finished." Only then would he let her go clean up the cut.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Sep 23, 2004 7:44 am
The apartment John and I used to live in was connected to a 6 bedroom sorority house. We were friends with all the girls, and they used to come over and use our washer and dryer.
One day, one of the girls was over doing laundry when her boyfriend called needing a ride. She asked if she could leave her clothes there and come back later. John said that was fine.
10 minutes after she left, i walked in to John's room (where the washer is) and caught him sniffing her dirty underwear. He tried to play it off as he knew I was coming and was joking, but I knew better.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Sep 23, 2004 7:48 am
One evening, John called me into his room. He was laying in bed with his new girlfriend (John had many). They were covered up, but you could see they were naked and that they had been "busy." John was laughing like crazy. He managed to calm down long enough to say "Roast Beef."
I asked him what he meant, and he motioned for his girl. She stuck her foot out from under the covers, and I saw she only had 3 toes!
He said, "This little piggy goes to market. This little piggy stayed home. This little piggy had roast beef. Look man, no more piggy's!"
He had stopped them in the middle of sex to call me in to make fun of her foot (lawn mower accident). He reffered to her as Roast Beef for the few weeks they were dating.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Sep 23, 2004 9:55 am
Thanks. This guy's a true gentleman. lol
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Sep 23, 2004 7:43 pm
O.. M.. G.. stare
John's a real shining star, now ain't he?
I'm a sooo glad I don't know that I know anyone like that.
^-.-^
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Sep 24, 2004 12:37 am
Back in 1999, John made a bet that in one year he could sleep with more women then there were national postal holidays. I believe the number that year was 15. John slept with 17 girls just to be on the safe side.
There's nothing worse than sitting in my room watching a movie and hearing him bang on the wall and yelling, "Seven!"
Then I had to write it on the callender. eek
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Sep 24, 2004 4:49 am
onlydraven Here's the First one. Once, John and his girlfriend were having sex. They were getting kind of "energetic," when all of a sudden, the bed rolled away from the wall. They fell off and she hit her head on the end table. She had blood pouring from the open wound. John, being the gentleman he is, continued hitting it for another minute or so untill he "finished." Only then would he let her go clean up the cut. lmao that's just wrong!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Sep 24, 2004 7:09 am
Once, John and I were moving from one house to another. We needed a truck to move our stuff. There was this 17 year old runn away that worked at John's Wendy's who really liked him. She wasn't very attractive, but John convinced her to lend us her truck if he screwed her.
He told me to wait in the truck for 20 minutes. I sat there for 12 minutes when he came out and handed me the keys. He said, "Damn! That took longer than I'd hoped!"
xd
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Sep 29, 2004 3:14 pm
onlydraven Once, John and I were moving from one house to another. We needed a truck to move our stuff. There was this 17 year old runn away that worked at John's Wendy's who really liked him. She wasn't very attractive, but John convinced her to lend us her truck if he screwed her. He told me to wait in the truck for 20 minutes. I sat there for 12 minutes when he came out and handed me the keys. He said, "Damn! That took longer than I'd hoped!" xd Boy, I must say, WHAT A ******** UP a*****e!!!! How did you ever live with him and not be irritated?
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Sep 29, 2004 10:13 pm
Hmm. I must say, if I ever mat that guy, I would deck him.. Very interesting stories though
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Sep 30, 2004 12:38 am
John was an interesting guy.
When the original Playstaion came out, John decided he wanted one. John, you see, was a clepto. He didn't like to pay for anything.
When the first Playstations came out they weren't kept behind glass. John went to Wal Mart and bought a plant and a big picture frame and then payed for them. He then continued to walk around the store. He came to the Playstations, and since no-one was around, he slid one into his bag. He started to leave, and said to himself, "If I get caught with this, I'm going to jail. Hell, I'm not going for just one."
John turned around and went back for 2 more. Imagine my surprise when he got home with 3 Playstations. xd
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Sep 30, 2004 8:04 am
onlydraven John was an interesting guy. When the original Playstaion came out, John decided he wanted one. John, you see, was a clepto. He didn't like to pay for anything. When the first Playstations came out they weren't kept behind glass. John went to Wal Mart and bought a plant and a big picture frame and then payed for them. He then continued to walk around the store. He came to the Playstations, and since no-one was around, he slid one into his bag. He started to leave, and said to himself, "If I get caught with this, I'm going to jail. Hell, I'm not going for just one." John turned around and went back for 2 more. Imagine my surprise when he got home with 3 Playstations. xd hahahahaha
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Sep 30, 2004 9:46 am
onlydraven John was an interesting guy. When the original Playstaion came out, John decided he wanted one. John, you see, was a clepto. He didn't like to pay for anything. When the first Playstations came out they weren't kept behind glass. John went to Wal Mart and bought a plant and a big picture frame and then payed for them. He then continued to walk around the store. He came to the Playstations, and since no-one was around, he slid one into his bag. He started to leave, and said to himself, "If I get caught with this, I'm going to jail. Hell, I'm not going for just one." John turned around and went back for 2 more. Imagine my surprise when he got home with 3 Playstations. xd He's an avil, sadistic man. But you have to laugh. Like DDR Hitler.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Sep 30, 2004 10:19 am
Wow, that's kind of really awesome, in the illegal way. sweatdrop Was John a diagnosed cleptomaniac? I mean, he obviously has something wrong with him... has he ever been examined by a professional?
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
