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 Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2006 9:29 am
For Right-Wingers only!
''My New Lexus''
I just got my new Lexus RX400H and returned to the dealer the next day
complaining that I couldn't figure out how the radio worked. The salesman explained that the radio was voice activated "Watch this" He said "Nelson"! The Radio replied "Ricky or Willie?" Willie"! He continued and "On The Road Again" came from the speakers.
I drove away happy, and for the next few days, every time I'd say
"Beethoven" I'd get beautiful classical music, and if I said "Beatles" I'd get one of their awesome songs. One day, a couple ran a red light and nearly creamed my new car but I swerved just in time to avoid them. I yelled "ASSHOLES!".
The French National Anthem began playing and it was sung by Jane Fonda and Michael Moore, backed up by John Kerry on guitar, Al Gore on drums, Bill Clinton on sax and Ted Kennedy on booze.
Damn, I LOVE this car!
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Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2006 9:31 am
God Bless Grandma --- Gotta Love 'Em!!!
"There were protesters on the train platform handing out pamphlets on the evils of America.
I politely declined to take one.
"An elderly woman was behind me getting off the escalator and a young (20' ish) female protester offered grandma a pamphlet, which she politely declined.
"The young protester put her hand on the grandma's shoulder as a gesture of friendship, and in a very soft voice said, 'Lady, don't you care about the children of Iraq?'
"The old woman looked up at her and said, "Honey, my father died in Germany during World War II, I lost my husband in the Korean War, and a son in Vietnam. All three died so you could have the right to stand here, and bad mouth our country. If you touch me again, I'll stick this umbrella up your a** and OPEN IT."
~God Bless Grandma, and God Bless America~
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Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2006 10:32 am
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Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2006 11:27 am
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Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2006 12:07 pm
salutes grandma...god bless her.... xd
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Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2006 1:00 pm
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