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 Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 5:29 am
Are men really like that?
I really should stop looking through my mother’s magazines. There’s a weird article in Complete Woman Oct/Nov 2005 about men. I just thought I’d ask some guys about it because I’m entering college next year. After four years without male contact (I’ve been attending an all-girl school), I’m going to maybe start dating. I don’t have a big brother to help me so maybe you guys could play that part. I don’t have a big sis either so a girl’s point of view would be appreciated as well. Also, I wanted to see if these applied to men in the Gundam universe so here are some selected blurbs from the article:
Secret 1: You will never be “one of the boys.”
There are always things he will prefer to do just with the guys- and with no women around- like talk sports, pass gas without apologizing for it and yep, talk about the most appealing part of a passing fancied female. Frankly that should be OK with you. It’s a perfect example of the adage, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder.”
Mind you, this article was written by a guy named Martin Brown so it’s a man’s point of view. I can see this as true since my prom date didn’t exactly like it when I stuck to him like glue. Relena must have realized this since she backs off of Heero after awhile. Duo doesn’t exactly keep Hilde around when he’s with the guys either since, despite being a close friend (or more), she’s never seen with Duo when the other guys are around.
Secret 11: He couldn’t stand it if you’re unfaithful.
Trust is the most important part of a lasting relationship. The second most important ingredient is passion. If you are not passionate about him, you’re better off taking a break from the relationship than taking a lover and losing his trust.
That makes perfect sense. Wouldn’t want anyone cheating on me... My ex-boyfriend did that. Anyway, I’ll use the example of how pissed Sai was at Kira and Flay (SEED). I wouldn’t want a mess like that...
Secret 12: He’d rather hide his feelings when he’s down.
Most women like to talk out their problems. Most guys like to work things through by themselves and then talk. It’s just a difference in style. Give him a kiss for support, then leave him alone.
I see this in 1xR since Heero really doesn’t involve Relena in his ZERO system angst and doesn’t really talk about his problems with her. 6x9 is a big example. Zechs would rather fire on Noin than tell her why he’s on Libra and what’s wrong. Are guys really like that?
Secret 13: He’d like to know if he “measures up” to the other men in your life.
To a guy, size matters, so if he’s got the edge on the other men you’ve known, let him know. Otherwise, let him know it’s the little things that matter most to you.
Can’t relate this one to Gundam... Are guys really so sensitive about ‘size’? I’m an innocent so I don’t really know about such things.
Secret 15: He doesn’t believe men and women can be “just friends.”
Yeah, he’ll always be just a little jealous of the old boyfriends that still hang around. And, yep, if he’s keeping in touch with an old girlfriend or two, you should know there’s more to the relationship than meets the eye...
Well, a lot of GW’s boy-girl ‘friendships’ are touted as couples like 2xH and 6x9 (which is canon). So girls can’t be just friends with guys?
Secret 16: Even if he says otherwise, sex is ALWAYS on his mind.
Not romance, but sex: pure unadulterated triple-x horniness- and not just every now and then, but 24/7. Ladies, that’s just the way most men are wired, so make the most of it. (At least once a day, OK?)
I sincerely hope this isn’t true. Please tell me this isn’t true! Of course, it would explain why Kira had the time to have sex with Flay despite all his battle angst...
Secret 17: He’s scared of losing you.
His relationship with you represents his success. It says, “I’m a guy who is desired by a great woman.” Knowing this gives you the upper hand, right? Use it wisely.
Hm... Does Heero feel this way? Well, he does praise Relena and tell her she’s so much better than him. I hope this is true.
Secret 21: He may not admit it, but he thinks you’re smarter than he is.
He knows that behind that twinkle in your eye is a fast-moving mind. He may not tell you this but it’s your one asset he admires the most.
Zechs actually admits this and says Noin made herself second to make him look good. Mind you, he never tells her this. Do guys have an inferiority complex?
Secret 22: He likes when you come on to him first.
When you’re first dating, he wants to be the aggressor. But when you share an intimate relationship of three or more months, every now and then it makes him feel great to be pursued.
I guess Relena should have waited until EW to start chasing after Heero. And I always thought guys liked to be in charge...
Secret 23: He’ll always be intimidated by your dad.
That’s because he’ll never be able to take the big guy’s place in your heart- nor should he. This gives you the perfect opportunity to show him there is room in your heart for both the men in your life.
One of Relena’s father figures is Zechs. This might play a part in his rivalry with Heero both in fan fiction and the series. A pity my dad works abroad and is never around...
Secret 25: There is always be at least one secret he’ll never tell you.
The smart gal always lets her man hold onto a secret or two. Without any mystery, would love sparks still fly so high? Probably not. Besides, you wouldn’t love him as much if he couldn’t keep a secret, right?
Well, all the GW guys have a lot of secrets. I guess I’ll have to restrain my impulse to be a snoop.
So there you go. I’m guessing some of you are a lot more mature than me. Can you tell me what’s fact and what’s fiction? Can you help me and be my big brothers and sisters?
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Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 8:29 am
I'm a girl so I can only guess. I've grown up surrounded by guys and most my friends are guys, OPEN guys who talk to me, and say disturbing stuff sometimes, and my dad tells me a lot too, but I still can't say these are accurate responses.
Secret 1:
I know guys who don't like sports (can't say much about the gas thing), and who DO like clingy girls. I know guys that're actually clingy (keeps crowbar in back pocket, j/k)
Secret 11:
Don't got much to say there.
Secret 12:
A lot of guys maybe, but I wouldn't exactly say most. I know crybaby guys and guys who loose their temper. So not all guys start sobbing when they cry, but a lot admit that they're feeling down or upset. Of course, there are a lot who don't. If you want a GW example there's Quatre biggrin
Secret 13:
uh...that might be true.
Secret 15:
Girls can be just friends with guys. i've got a lot of 'just friend' guys. and to prove that they've already got girlfriends.
Secret 16:
That's a downright LIE. Guys have tons of other things on their minds, and some don't even think about sex often till they're ready to get serious (I think)
Secret 17: I think Heero might be scared of loosing Relena, maybe so, maybe not. But in reality there's some guys that just want you GONE.
Secret 25:
I guess I agree with that
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Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 8:37 am
Secret 1, I've come pretty damn close to proving wrong. The guys will talk sports around me, they will pass gas around me, and laugh when I smell it. Only one of them has actually told me what part of the female body he's found most appealing, and he was drunk when he told me, so I don't think that counts.
Secret 11 is true. If that ever happens he will either key your car, damage your stuff, or find some way to ruin your reputation. Men gossip more than women, they're just faster in how they relay the information. They don't dwell on one subject too long.
Secret 12 has been proven wrong. My ex did not hide his feelings when I broke it off with him. Strangely enough I was the only one who could get through to him. Now he's an a** to me.
Secret 13 is way too true. One thing that men have that women don't, p***s envy.
Secret 15 is proven wrong occassionally. There are a few men that don't believe this because they're still friends with their exes. Though, these men are hard to find but easy to spot.
Secret 16 is true. I'll quote my friend on this one. "There are three things men always think about. Food, sleep, and sex. In that order. When their next meal is. When they're gonna sleep next, and when they're gonna get sex." He's been pretty insightful to me.
Secret 17 is true. Each man has a different degree of paranoia. They all dwell on that.
Secret 21 is halfway true. They don't think you're smarter. They KNOW you're smarter.
Secrets 22 & 23 are true.
Secret 25 is true because its always fun to try to pry the secret out of them and never get the answer. It gives you something to do and something to wonder about. ^_^
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Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 3:32 pm
Well, as a man, I can try to help. Please bear in mind that I'm not the stereotypical jerk guy, tho, so I may be wrong on some of them.
Secret 1: Girls can very well be "one of the boys". My brother's GF is looked at by their friends (past and present), but at the same time they don't do all the stereotypical guy things; they're just not those kinds of guys. Honestly, I wonder WHY a girl would want to be that kind of "one of the guys"; I don't even want to be that kind. Though to be fair, some people might like to keep their female friends distinct from their male ones.
Secret 11: Most guys (if not all) are really nuts about girls cheating. Some of them have the dumb macho territorial thing going on, but others really do care about their girlfriends, and being cheated on hurts them just as much as it hurts women. Some guys are more casual about it, but that seems very rare. And yes, trust is VERY important.
PS: Please bear in mind that I'm talking exclusively about girls cheating with men; some people don't seem to think of a girlfriend having a bisexual dalliance as cheating. And of course, I'm totally not talking about the sort of guys who drool and gush at the thought of lesbian action.
Secret 12: Every man is different; you can't make a sweeping statement about all of them. Personally, if I'm in a bad mood, I'd like a little quiet time to mull over things, and eventually I'll talk about it. Of course, I don't mind a little snuggling when I'm in a bad mood...
Secret 13: Some men get really caught up in the "size" issue. I'm sure you've all heard the jokes about big, fast cars being bought to make up for small "packages". Other guys don't care. Of course, this only matters if a guy starts a relationship with a girl who's already been sexual with a man in her life.
Secret 15: Guys CAN be just friends with girls, trust me. Men don't see all women as sex opportunities, just like women don't see all men as meat. If you respect someone's mind and spirit, gender doesn't matter; friends are friends.
Secret 16: I'm not gonna lie: guys think about sex a lot. Maybe not "always" in the most literal sense of the word, but very very often. Of course, this doesn't mean that a guy expects sex out of his girlfriend every day either.
Secret 17: Once more, it really depends on the kind of guy. I knew a jerk who boasted about using women for sex and not bothering to form any deeper relationship with them. When it comes to guys who actually have hearts, though, they DO care about losing their girlfriends. Finding someone who understands you on that kind of level is rare and special, and anyone who realizes this will do whatever it takes to keep the relationship.
Secret 21: It all depends. My GF doesn't think too highly of herself, but she IS smart. The old stereotype is that men are stronger, but women are smarter. That's not always true.
Secret 22: Some guys like to be in charge all the time, but others aren't into the whole submissive girlfriend thing. When the girl is aggressive, it makes the relationship feel mutual, and not just like he's using her.
Secret 23: Fathers are always daunting to boyfriends, but not for that reason. Daddy doesn't like anyone doing anything to his little girl, and as far as many are concerned, her boyfriend is only interested in one thing. Therefore, we get things like the Eight Simple Rules (TM). But regarding their version, I think most guys realize that they never can (and never should) remove the parents from his girlfriend's life.
Secret 25: Some guys have things they're embarassed about; others just don't like sharing it all. I think this one is probably true, but for different reasons. But yes, mystery does indeed add spice to a relationship.
Once more, remember that this is just me. All men are different.
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Preventer Void Vice Captain
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Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 5:47 pm
Quote: Secret 1: You will never be “one of the boys.” Hm well I don't think this is entirely true it depends how well the girl gets along with the guys sort of thing. Quote: Secret 11: He couldn’t stand it if you’re unfaithful. This one can be quite true, I know this because I've met girls or ones on the net as well who've decided to covenniently move on to someone else then forget to tell me and drop a bomb on you. However in some cases willing to forgive depending on how bad and what the reasons are. Quote: Secret 12: He’d rather hide his feelings when he’s down. I tend to sometimes though I open up more because it helps actually in my case. Quote: Secret 13: He’d like to know if he “measures up” to the other men in your life. True, true, trying to be in a good spot and size doesn't have to mean in reference to physical it could also mean if he's wondering how much a girl likes him, if that makes sense, sort of like comparing. Quote: Secret 15: He doesn’t believe men and women can be “just friends.” This tends to be a thing, but it's not like that, guys can be friends with girls as well, so I know it aint a true secret, do get sometimes jealous of competetion though or bfs or sometimes ex bfs for wrong reasons also if you think about it that way if you get a bad feeling or notice something odd. Quote: Secret 16: Even if he says otherwise, sex is ALWAYS on his mind. It's true, but I don't always do something with it neccessarily in fact my last 5-6 days with chickenpox have kind of put other thoughts on my mind more so. Quote: Secret 17: He’s scared of losing you. This can be true it depends how much the guy cares and how much the girl means to him. In my cases it does depend but I can definetely be affraid of loosing someone close to me in that sense. Quote: Secret 21: He may not admit it, but he thinks you’re smarter than he is. This tends to be true girls are generally smarter it seems nowadays, so I admit to it. Quote: Secret 22: He likes when you come on to him first. For me depends on the girl and if I like her or not would help me decide if I make a move first or not. Quote: Secret 23: He’ll always be intimidated by your dad. Not 100% true, not all younger males would be intimidated by the dad sort of thing, not all dads are super tough scary types anywho. Quote: Secret 25: There is always be at least one secret he’ll never tell you. True, we always have to keep some things to ourselves for own reasons and because girls will most likely critisize us upon revealing them or they'll kill us or numerous other bad possible outcomes. Well that is my lot of answers.
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Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 6:56 pm
wow... i don't really know anything about guys... i should read that article sweatdrop
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Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 7:42 pm
Well, with your comments, I’m getting kind of nervous.
Oreasa: I attend an all-girl school and I know women have their own form of p***s envy. It’s in relation to one’s chest and being the one in class with a chest bordering on a Cup C, I’ve been poked and cited whenever my classmates and I change clothes together. Oh well, it’s a gift and a curse. I try to hide it best I can. At least men don’t have to walk around with their penises hanging out and no one stares. This is one of the reasons I’m worried about college with guys...
Void: I’ll keep in mind that guys are different. Mind you, I’m young and sexually inactive so I need lots of info. My first and last boyfriend was in sixth grade and he cheated. After that experience, I moved to an all-girl school so the only impression of a man I have is a bad one since my dad’s never around due to work. I hope what you say about guys being friends is true. I could use a guy friend after four years of only girls.
Robin: You have chicken pox? Well, good luck with that. Thanks for the advice. I hope you get better soon. At least you’re thinking about some other things now...
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Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 7:42 pm
Here's the first secret you should know. Quit readin them magazines! That's certainly the wrong way to learn about people. Especially when it's as stereotypical as this. It's kind of difficult for me to say for sure how valid most of these things are, since I'm usually trying the best I can to break down gender stereotypes (they're a pet peeve of mine). There are some truth to a few of them though, but I think if you really think about it you'll realize they apply to women as well as men.
As for secret one, it really depends on the girlfriends interests. We consider the g/f of one of my best friends 'one of the guys' since we all share the same interests and there's no sense of awkwardness when she's around.
I think a lot of you guys are taking 13 too literally ninja I can attest that I have felt some sense of comfort from knowing that the previous boyfriend my girlfriend was a jerk, so I guess that would mean I 'measured up' a little higher than him in character. That's just my interpretation of the secret. Oh yeah, and having a larger size can be rather annoying, but we won't get into that gonk
25 especially applies to both men and women, because EVERYONE has their untold secrets.
I guess I can see parts of me in this and parts that are just outright lies, but my best advice to you is to take this magazine article, and all of our replies too, with a grain of salt. The best luck you'll have is just with forging your own ideas after encountering males. As both a Lady and Colonel, I'm sure you'll fair just fine, Une 3nodding
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Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 7:47 pm
Colonel Lady Une Well, with your comments, I’m getting kind of nervous. Oreasa: I attend an all-girl school and I know women have their own form of p***s envy. It’s in relation to one’s chest and being the one in class with a chest bordering on a Cup C, I’ve been poked and cited whenever my classmates and I change clothes together. Oh well, it’s a gift and a curse. I try to hide it best I can. At least men don’t have to walk around with their penises hanging out and no one stares. This is one of the reasons I’m worried about college with guys... Void: I’ll keep in mind that guys are different. Mind you, I’m young and sexually inactive so I need lots of info. My first and last boyfriend was in sixth grade and he cheated. After that experience, I moved to an all-girl school so the only impression of a man I have is a bad one since my dad’s never around due to work. I hope what you say about guys being friends is true. I could use a guy friend after four years of only girls. Robin: You have chicken pox? Well, good luck with that. Thanks for the advice. I hope you get better soon. At least you’re thinking about some other things now... I've had it for 5-6 days it's in the dying stages now, so I'm on my way to recovering.
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Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 7:48 pm
Well, thanks for the vote of support! 3nodding I only read magazines because my mom won't let me near men. The only man I know who's around a lot is my driver and he's not exactly insightful...
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Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 7:51 pm
Colonel Lady Une Well, thanks for the vote of support! 3nodding I only read magazines because my mom won't let me near men. The only man I know who's around a lot is my driver and he's not exactly insightful... Oh dear, well that's going to have to change, especially if you're starting college. You can't live in a bubble all your life and hope to still learn about your surroundings. I guess I'm just stating the obvious now though sweatdrop I'll shut up so you don't get overloaded with advice xd
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Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 7:55 pm
Yeah, I kinda forgot we have our own form of that. I got at least two friends in your position, Lady. I tend to forget about our form seeing as how I'm on the oppossite end as you.
ChibiDuo's right though. Our opinions don't mean squat, but that doesn't mean we don't like to give them. We live in different areas so the men will act differently.
Robin: Ouch. Hope ya get better.
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Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 8:39 pm
Improving, don't need to worry.
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Posted: Sat Jul 15, 2006 1:07 am
Hmmm... good luck with the men folk, Une. We can be a pain sometimes. I can't tell you so much about the average guy, not being all that average myself, but I'll help when I can.
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Posted: Wed Jan 24, 2007 4:14 pm
Colonel Lady Une Well, thanks for the vote of support! 3nodding I only read magazines because my mom won't let me near men. The only man I know who's around a lot is my driver and he's not exactly insightful... uh driver??? well anyways Secret 1: You will never be “one of the boys.” keyword boys but i never referto my friends as that honestley im mostly srounded by friends that are girls so ya... sweatdrop Secret 11: He couldn’t stand it if you’re unfaithful. well cheat on me I get pissed imagne killing you and break up. no physcal harm tho. Secret 12: He’d rather hide his feelings when he’s down. as I said I am surrounded by girls all the time so I learend that doing that will only make them mad. Secret 13: He’d like to know if he “measures up” to the other men in your life. .....i really don't care Secret 15: He doesn’t believe men and women can be “just friends.” i do most of my friends are girlsabout 80% Secret 16: Even if he says otherwise, sex is ALWAYS on his mind. nope it's realy the last thing i think about i just like to see them smile smile Secret 17: He’s scared of losing you. SPOIL HER Secret 21: He may not admit it, but he thinks you’re smarter than he is. well I am usualy just as smart as my gf Secret 22: He likes when you come on to him first. true i like it Secret 23: He’ll always be intimidated by your dad. well if you going to pick her up and you see him shing his gun for his hunting trip the next day what would you do??? Secret 25: There is always be at least one secret he’ll never tell you. i cant keep one of my own secrets but i hold others well my friends force mine out of me sweatdrop . well im surrounded by girls alot so ovusly im screwed up somewhere in the head.
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