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I just need some space to think.



Aris rose and extended her hand, feeling the firm clap of the meaty paw of the club owner as it closed around hers. He grinned and laughed, a deep chested sound, as he welcomed her aboard. There was something in his eyes that invited her, in the way he continued to hold her hand for a few moments with a firmness that tested her own strength in a subtle way. She smiled in reply, but no interest stirred to accept.

Fifth Avenue was a posh bar and nightclub downtown, one interested in hiring new security. James was an understanding owner and part time gym rat who seemed more impressed by the width of her shoulders than worried about her lack of any real background. They'd chatted weights and styles, her being new to town and needing a fresh start someplace.

Being a bouncer wasn't a dream job, but it was a place to start.


I want something thats MINE, not ours, something I can get some footing on.



The landlady had made eyes at her as she showed her the little apartment on the edge of downtown, going on about the new security system and the new countertops. The large windows were what had drawn her attention and her feet to stand in front of them, looking out at the brick buildings and the people walking by down below. It wasn't huge. The counters might be new, but they were cheap, just like the 'new' carpet. It didn't really matter. It had a bedroom and a livingroom that flowed into the kitchen and dining space, and a bathroom with a tiny tub.

It was enough, and when she signed the paperwork and handed over a check, it was hers. Empty, but hers.


I barely know you, and when we're not together, I don't even know why we are, but like... the minute I see you, everything just clicks and its confusing.
I just need to center myself, you know? I'm not saying this is the end of it, its not, but I don't want to start out things where I'm depending on you for everything.
I can't be a real partner if I can't stand on my own two feet.



The bed arrived this morning, which was an improvement over a sleeping bag on the floor. She'd gotten some plastic plates and cups at the dollar store just to fill in until she decided what she really wanted. A Goodwill had supplied the couch and TV, though the cable guy wouldn't arrive for another week yet, and the place was at least tolerable, if not perfect. Every new addition made her feel more settled, like each one was a stamp of ownership, of stability and a mark of her ability to take care of herself. It was important, though it would have been impossible to explain to someone who didn't already understand.

When the com on the wall buzzed, it startled her out of her thoughts and she punched the button with a frown.

"Yeah?"

"Hey, its me. I brought beer. Can I come up?"

Aris frowned as she stared at the box, but there was a traitorous fluttering and a slow swelling of excitement at hearing the familiar voice, even distorted through the aging com. Her reply was another buzz as she hit the door release and then she was... bustling, for lack of a better word, around the apartment to move the cold pizza box from the couch to the counter and kick her clothes into the closet in the bedroom.

When the knock came at the door, she was already there to open it, red eyes taking in the tall, buff figure waiting there in his hoodie and ragged jeans. He lifted the promised beer with an uncertain smile, but rather than take it, she grabbed his wrist instead and tugged him inside, something wound tight inside of her releasing suddenly.


I can't think sometimes, past how hard I want you. I don't even know who the ******** I am, but that's always been clear. Let me figure myself out and maybe then things will start making sense again.



The beer would wait for them in the empty fridge. No furniture meant a lot of empty floor to stretch out on and now there was no time limit. Just getting to know each other again, as fast or slow as they wanted to take it.

Felyn
Just an fyi for things happening. Let me know if its still okay/not okay to puppet him a little in the background