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 Posted: Mon Jan 15, 2018 4:28 pm
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From his perch atop the old temple of his scattered pride he had watched it all, the movement of time and the sands, his memories gone and his heart as wide and open as it had ever been. As the memories slowly returned the sands covered the proof of his beloved lions, of their triumphs and pains, of their beautiful lives and their heartbreaking deaths. His heart closed a little and memories had begun to return against his will.
A mate and cubs murdered by the gods he'd called brothers and sisters, another brilliant lioness that gave him cubs who had lied to him. Azraceri had told him they were his siblings as he grew and when his memories flooded back he remembered his children, pulled from his own lineage they were no longer his cubs, cursed once more. Brother from long ago, a face swam into his memories, and the green caused his fur to bristle and his fangs to slowly show. Their dance of curses had continued as he ceased to grow past his adolescence once more, what was his name, it was coming back slowly but it came in time.
Sand covered everything, sand and pain, the god remembered and grew angry. Athrun closed his heart but could no longer cover his eyes.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Edges of his white wings had tattered over months and months of walking and dragging them wherever he went, searching for something but not really interested in anything that another soul had to offer. It was the curse of his life that he had been born as the god of loneliness, the worst of all domains in his opinion as everyone that he met had sadness so steeped in their hearts that it broke his into pieces and left him drained after the encounters. Just once he would be happy, privileged even, to meet a soul that wasn't as lonely and broken as all those he had known. As he himself felt. Doing his best to lift his wings onto his back once again, the weight of everything he had recently remembered weighing them down as much as his heart, Athrun set about finding something to eat to keep himself going. Flying hadn't been critical to him in the past anyway and with the added issues of his curse and the general distrust that he held for his fellow gods now, something that grew with each passing day, the old god was understandably wary of flying any longer and using an ability that might make him overly visible while he was alone in the world.
It was hard to even do so with his stomach so empty anyhow, flying took a surprising amount of energy and he didn't have stores of it saved up currently as he wandered the plains looking for something he couldn't name. Without looking hard at the creature that ran in front of his paws, Athrun took a swipe at it and lunch was his even if it was only a small hare. Somewhere there would be another waiting for this hare to return home and though he would give it a day or so, the god was certain he would feel the pinprick of loneliness and the heartbreak that came with it shortly. It made eating hard but it was a necessity to life and so no matter his feelings on the matter it had to happen for him to continue on. Starving was not an option even if he ate so little that one would think that he was. Maybe he could go down to the ocean and find fish, it reminded him of an old friend every time he looked at it and the bittersweet memories of it would be a welcome reprieve from his harsh revere.
Movement caught his attention and blue eyes turned to take in the familiar sight of a lioness hunting, brilliantly red and yellow fur on the top of her head stood out despite her brown coat. For a moment he felt nothing but the niggling feeling of distant calls that he always did, the voices of lonely souls that wanted attention he didn't have the will or ability to currently give. It would seem that the lioness was lost, or at least wandering without purpose, for her eyes did not settle on a distant landmark and her movements were unhurried in their steady way. It was remarkably similar to his own situation, so very much so that Athrun found his paws moving in her direction despite himself. No screaming torrent of loneliness was coming off her, just a faint tug that was quite common in all creatures even if they were unaware of it themselves. Though he wished not to draw attention to himself, the god knew that his hulking size and brilliant white fur, matched with the glimmer of gold that he wore, would mark him as the most obvious thing this side of the horizon. It didn't quite trouble him though, nothing and no one had even tried to cause him harm recently and he could easily fly away even if his feathers were tattered. |
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Posted: Tue Jan 16, 2018 12:16 pm
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Posted: Tue Jan 16, 2018 5:14 pm
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Feelings washed over him for only a moment and were gone, whispers all that were left as the lioness stepped toward him in a bold manner. There were those that would have called her foolish to approach a god or even another lion in general that looked as battered and thin as he, somewhere deep inside he was one of them but held his tongue carefully as if it would insult her. Breaths coming at the same steady pace as always and wings pulling slowly up, joints folding them and feathers rustling until they settled in a more respectable upon his back, Athrun felt the pull that indicated their wish to slide back down towards the ground in his weary state. However he was a god, once that had meant something to him and even though he had little self respect or even pride in his appearance with his current state of mind, the look that was being leveled at him brought him to roll his shoulders and try to stand straighter. Altogether it came off comical in that respect and he knew it, what was the opinion of another to him when they would certainly be gone in the blink of his long life. Just a blip.
"Don't worry, any pain heals faster than it should." Voice deeper and darker than one would guess to come from such a white lion, Athrun had once been the voice that hung on the night air when others languished alone. Though it held sadness it was also calm and even despite appearances that claimed he himself was not. "Nothing but the self infliction of little care brings one to this state, not another. Do not worry lioness, you have nothing to fear in this part of the savannah."
Many a day had been spent with his large paws traipsing this area in circles with nowhere to really go. If the world were out there to be explored he simply had no desire to do so with his heart so closed to the beauty of life. Danger was minimal with it so open, if one were being hunted they could see their pursuers easily on this stretch of flat grass, though it would be somewhat hard to escape unless they were strong enough to fight back. Not knowing her he couldn't assume her level of strength or wily will, many were far too kind to fight as savagely as was called for in times of fear and panic. Traveling the savannah alone was impressive though, lions had a tendency to seek out company and live in groups, even as a god he had understood this and watched over a pride that he was fortunate enough to love and call home for many years. For one to be so alone out here was cause for concern, was there no one she could travel with?
"What has you so far from another, wandering the savannah plains alone?" Athrun bowed his head to the lioness as if to emphasize his question, but the movement forced him to realize that he was tired. Exhaustion was one thing, weariness was quite another and it had sapped his energy and drive until he wandered aimlessly in search of nothing and everything. "Certainly there are others to travel with that would ensure your safety."
Was she really so alone?
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Posted: Sun Jan 21, 2018 3:15 pm
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Adventurers tended to be some of the most lonely souls that he met, in fact he'd met dozens of them over the years that he could remember, all following a call somewhere. What form that call took could vary depending on who was searching and wandering across the savannah, but this lioness looked as though she were simply wandering for the chance to see life. Bravery came off of her in waves, something he would have to mention to another god of a more appropriate of that particular domain to look after her, Athrun could only add his support to one with a heavy heart. Still it amused him so to see her put on such a brave face despite being all alone with no family to recall and no friends to travel with her.
"Gods are fine to meet, though there are those that truly will wish you harm in the future should you continue this pattern of meeting them. Surely there are others out on the plains that will travel with you, those that share the same desires and could travel together with you for safety?" lifting his head up to look at the rather barren section the two stood in, it seemed a terrible fate to simply run around with no destination. The irony was of course not lost on him given the way he had lived in recent years, so lost himself that if he'd the stomach to reach out to her he might actually have asked the goddess of the Lost to aid him.
Gods and Goddesses were not his favorite beings though, even if he himself happened to be a god he was rather unwilling to settle in their presence as of late. Twice he had suffered at the claws of divine beings with powers far superior to his own or at the very least more combative. Twice he had let down his guard around them, cursed the first time and killed the second. What there was for him to gain from any was beyond him, but certainly he could remember a time when he'd had friends above and it hurt him to think that they might have been responsible for his first curse, for the murder of his family. For this lioness to want to meet any of them...
"You certainly are brave. Being out here all alone, no one at your side but it is still concerning." Turning his blue eyes back to her he pondered for a moment the fact that he had no destination himself. "Are you in need of a travel companion?"
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Posted: Thu Jan 25, 2018 9:40 am
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Without warning, his muzzle split into a smile that warmed his features nicely and his blue eyes closed as he chuckled. God of Laughter, he was an interesting one that Athrun could faintly remember from a life now past, the memories foggy as he stretched for them beyond the haze that often kept him from them. Twice reborn, it was not enough for his soul to have forgotten everything like others who had been reborn countless times to the Haven above that housed so many divine spirits. There were even memories, pressed far down under the weight of years, that indicated a darkness guarded by only one who's face he could remember even if he tried to dismiss it. To reach for the laughter that rang through his memories was far better and this lioness appeared to be looking for it each day as she travelled to no place in particular.
"Very well said, young Nyimak." Athrun pulled his wings tight to himself and stretched his powers out to cover his whole form, the wings disappearing and the gold vanishing from him, only a spare angle or two left un-glamoured on his front legs and tail. For all purposes he appeared as a large white adolescent that had yet to grow into his mane, it did not bother him to look awkward and still thin of frame.
It was a disturbing feeling to be without his wings, but he could not traipse about and put this lioness in danger to simply appear as his godly self. If he were to travel as a mortal then it would be as a mortal did, feet walking across the dirt and grass of the ground, tied to the earth as all other mortals were. As much as Athrun could remember he could not recall the type of mortal he had been before ascending to become the divine being he was now. Had he been a lion? Had he been a lonely creature that died of a lonely heart? Someday he might find the answer but this was not that day, this was a day to explore a new part of him and not the old that would never be again. Today was a chance at a new start in his life that didn't involve brooding and traveling completely alone, for once with another that might show him a different way than what he'd known.
"If the company of the god of loneliness would be welcome walking at your side, then I would gladly travel with you for a bit. My feet have no destination other than away from my past and away from my own losses." At this he bowed his head to Nyimak and though he would have tilted his wings forward with it he felt that only bending his legs would surely work in this form. Mortals meant more to him than any god, even more than he cared for himself, though there had been those in the past that eased the latter feeling. "My name is Athrun and I have been wandering alone for quite some time. To travel with another would be a welcome change of lifestyle that has plagued me until this point."
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Posted: Sat Jan 27, 2018 7:48 pm
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