Full Name: [ Talise Dermot ] Nicknames: [ Tali, Lisie (Lee-See), Lise (Lease) ] Race: [ Yaeli ] Gender: [ Female ] RP Color:[#C5908E] Age: [ Youngling ] Religion: [ Dualism ] Political Affiliation: [ Ha ha ha… Good one!~ ]
3 Base Traits: [ -Placid -Solitary -Analytical]
Personality: [ Placid: Talise is a surprisingly peaceful soul. She is content to just be still, in nature, alone. From her speech to her mannerisms she is very tranquil; it takes quite the ruckus to get her riled. Even when she is riled she tends to bottle it inside until she can’t hold it in anymore… Once that point has been reached she, depending on whether she can influence the situation or not, she turns to prayer. However, if she can change the situation her action is swift and decisive and like involves some sort of violence.
Solitary: When overwhelmed Lisie seeks solitude to center herself and regain control of her temper; lest she turns out like her father. Her interests also tend to be somewhat off-putting to most earthlings, but it all serves a greater purpose through the knowledge it provides her. Her solidarity can be a double-edged sword; as much as she may need it… She also tends to get lonely.
Analytical: Lise learns most of what she does on a trial basis; find a problem, fix the problem, what did you learn along the way that makes it easier to fix in the future? If she can discover how it all works, she will have a better understanding in the future. ]
Serious Problems/Flaws/Addictions/Disorders/Disabilities: [ Socially Awkward: Spending most of her time in the rickety basic studio style home on the edge of a bayou; she doesn’t get much social interaction. What social interaction she gets is likely not healthy. Now, she does escape it sometimes in the hopes of meeting new people, but when she does most find her to be… disturbed. I imagine through more interaction this trait will improve.
Caring: When Lise “bonds” with something she develops this nurse-like desire to care for it. A good example would be an injured creature. She would coddle it like a baby and use whatever knowledge she had on the species to help in any way possible, but she would keep it as far away from anyone else as possible; especially her father - for fear he might just put it out of its misery. She would lie and evade and do anything in her power to keep her “healing” a secret - steal supplies, etc.
Temper/ Mental Stability: Talise tries to remain calm because she has seen her father and what happens when he is upset; she doesn’t want to do that. She tries to alienate herself for fear she would hurt someone, she tries to be tranquil to keep from “unleashing the beast”. Every social interaction she feels as though she is walking a tightrope and if she takes the wrong step she could do something terrible… Through further interaction, she will learn that her father is just a very ill man and that his madness is not her own. ]
Likes: [ natural anomalies/ birth defects, Healing things by whatever means are available to her, singing/humming wordless tunes, ]
Dislikes: [ Other Earthlings telling her she’s gross, a monster, tainted or hexed or cursed, being chased or threatened when people ask about her father. ]
Religion: [ Lurin The male God, God of the Land of the Remembered, often depicted as the light side of the deities *As a youngling Tali will pray to Lurin to help guide her father down a lighter path and to bring him back to her. Nothing ever changes, and she eventually loses faith that Lurin has any regards for her. She loses faith that he would ever turn his gaze on her and turns her sights to Dafiel in her later stages.
Dafiel The female Goddess, Goddess of the Land of the Forgotten often depicted as the darker side of the deities Upon learning of her father's activities in her later stages, she turns to darker hobbies and takes an interest in developing poisons through various plant matter. As death became a natural part of her everyday life, she becomes numb to it and inevitably accepts it is a part of life. Talise embraces Dafiel as her primary deity. ]
Hobbies: [ drawing/studying keldari, playing with Keldari - feeding them certain crystals to see how it changes them, growing exotic plants, creating poisons and poultices ]
Special Abilities/Skills: [ Not being grossed out by gore, a determination to learn, the ability to completely remove herself emotionally from a situation ]
Occupation(s): [ (youngling) Keldari Wrangler : More like a hobby than anything, really~ ] Past Occupation(s): [ ------ ]
Physical Description: [ Eyes: Giant doe eyes, always looks a little sad… or sleepy… maybe depressed? Ears: long, slender, and adorable~ Nose: Petite button nose with a slightly curved bridge Crystal Placement: See Reference in Collage, one smooth perfectly round circle in the dip of her collarbone, and X - if someone can work the symbol for deflect/block on her abdomen or rib somehow my life would be complete. Freckle Placement: Starting with a light dappling along the top edge of ears, cheeks, nose, and a little on the forehead(closer to brow line and bridge of nose). As her skin is exposed to sunlight or chemicals more freckles will be added~ Hair: Mahogany purple, short and slight curl toward the ends. Will get longer as she ages. Height: Final height- Stage 2: 4’9” ]
The images used in this collage are to be used as references
Clothing: [ Youngling: >3 NEKKID~ Would enjoy having ragged ol'scarf if possible...? Prentice: Dull shades of Gray, Green and Brown - Boots~ - Button up jacket with pocket - Gray - large on her - Pants - Brown - large on her/rolled up - Long sleeved shirt - Green - longer - Boots! - I'm thinking they will be the same color as they are in the Collage~ Stage 2: Taking what we have from her prentice stage and changing them slightly. - Over the shoulder half shirt with belts - I like the idea of this, but with a different sleeve... maybe poofy but tight around the wrist? (will have to experiment) - keep pants and long sleeved shirt from the prior stage(Similar to other image w/o big black triangle parka) - Ol' Scarf can serve as "hood" Stage 3: I like everything about this image, but I would like to incorporate the scarf in some way. Stage 4: Same as stage 3, incorporate Dafiel influences Legendary: As it turned out... There were three images~ So Same as the prior two stages! ]
Accessories: [ At some point in her later stages I would like her to have an intricate “walking stick” >3 ]
Weapons (if any): [ Her primary weapon will be Magic; with the use of a book. Plotted spells consist of: Health, Wall, Force, and Fire - May add life at some point… Not sure yet. ]
History: [ Talise Dermot was born of childhood sweethearts~ Tavinia and Kartane. They had been through it all together. Her mother, Tavinia, was a gorgeous young scholar with deep mahogany purple hair, long slender ears, beautiful spherical glowing eyes; she was perfect… In more than just her father’s eyes. How she ended up with a lowlife like Kartane? Well, that goes back to their youth. There aren’t many families that are willing to settle in the swamp-like bayou between settlements; it’s generally settled out of desperation. Tavinia’s family had fallen on hard times and was forced out of the Ilidan settlement over a dispute. Seeing as they weren’t the only ones; they settled closish to the Dermot abode.
Blessed with a beautiful baby girl the downhearted couple poured everything they had into making her the best she could be. Her mother was an excellent seamstress, and her father gifted in making intricate textiles. Tavinia always had the finest clothes her parents could provide, and with her looks - This may have gotten her into a bit of trouble~
That’s where her rowdy neighbor comes in! Kartane was born of the pinnacle of outcasts in society. His mother was mentally unstable… Always cuddling a doll that she would claim was Kartane as a baby; that he never grew up to look so much like his father. Whenever she laid eyes on her aging son she would shriek and cry and swat at him to leave. Kartane’s father- a violent drunk. Needless to say, there was always some sort of ruckus going on at the Dermot household and none of it good. Kartane would flee any chance he got; which often leads him to visit his only neighbor; Tavinia.
Her family gave him some normalcy in his otherwise hectic life… So he, in kind, protected their daughter, cared for her, and eventually fell in love with her. She was his everything, but as she aged her parents continued to pressure her to pursue a life outside of the Bayou- Move to Pajore, devote herself to The Sanctum…
By this time, Kartane’s mother had passed of seemingly natural causes in her sleep, turning all his father’s aggression onto him. One night, through the flying fists of his father, Kartane managed to grab a meat cleaver… By the end of it all, Kartane was left standing and the local wildlife would eat well that night~
Home alone(long after his father’s “disappearance”), Kartane received a late night visit from his favorite neighbor, Tavinia. The couple shared a night of passion; one Kartane would likely never forget, and by morning Tavinia was nowhere to be found. All she left behind was a tear-stained letter “Good Bye” sealed with her soft purple lipstick.
Kartane was devastated. To cope, he turned to similar habits of his father - drinking… It was a rough year for him, but when he emerged on the other side of it, he found a package at his door - And there was a note.
‘Kartane, I understand this may be difficult for you, but I have made a life in Pajore. As much as I tried to leave you in my past, it would seem as though you followed me anyway. This is your daughter, Talise.
Goodbye’
No signature… No tears… Just cold distant facts and a bundle on his step. Releasing the letter to the wind with all his bitter, negative energy, he brought the bundle inside. Draining all his bottles into the swamp, he started trying to find a way to provide for his daughter; by any means necessary ]
Family: [ Kartane Dermot - Father - [Height: 5’4” ] [ Build: Scrawny(140ish?) and solid muscle… like not an ounce of fat on this dude but each muscle is visible and cut] [Hair: Nearly white lavender and cut very short.(his hair was darker purple but the longer he stayed in the swamp-like land he lived in the paler his hair got - either through consumption or exposure)] [Skin: pale olive with a crapload of freckles, more concentration where the sun hits skin. (shoulders, neck, back, head, arms, face) (when out in the sun he burns super fast and then when it heals he freckles - doesn’t seem to tan at all though~) ] [ Eyes: Typical… Yaeli Eyes? ] [Clothes: loose knee-high shorts, shin-high work boots, button up *jacket/shirt, *hat, *ragged plaid scarf (*weather depending)]
[Personality: To the average person Kartane mostly keeps to himself - he understands that people would see him as the outcast because of where he lives. He rarely makes appearances in any of the settlements(until he was looking for work after he received his daughter). On the off chance someone does approach him, he’s pretty outgoing actually. You would leave the conversation with that feeling of ‘huh, that went a lot better than I thought it would~’
To his daughter, he is the fun, loving, playful father any child could dream of. Though his work at the local mortuary had odd hours and meager pay, he did his best to make sure little Talise was never alone. ]
As mentioned above Kartane was born to the pinnacle of outcasts: An angry drunk and a mentally unstable woman. His upbringing was less than stable and once he had some solid ground to stand on it was washed out from under him when his lover, Tavinia, left for Pajore - and her family shortly behind her. Alone, in his own sort of way, he dealt with her leaving. A little over a year had passed and he received word from her… and a daughter.
It wasn’t perfect, but it was something and he made the most of it. Against all odds, Kartane straightened out his act and Talise became the center of his world. He tried doing odd jobs to provide for her. It was usually hard manual labor or jobs that no one else wanted to do. With a bit of luck, he managed to land a semi-permanent position as a mortician's assistant. He didn't really do much with the burial rituals, but he was great for the heavy lifting, and grave digging. It wasn't ideal, but it was consistent work and for the security of his daughter's future, Kartane began to settle into his new role in Yaeli society. ]
[Tavinia - Mother - After leaving the swampy bayou, Tavinia's family returned to Pajore. She earned a job doing menial tasks inside the outer sanctum. Eventually, she will earn herself an apprenticeship through a reputable seamstress in the sanctum and as her reputation grows, she is eventually able to restore her family's name; thus returning her parents to their former glory. With their life returned to normal, Tavinia finds herself freed of obligation to them and leaves the sanctum to find what it is she wants in life. ]
Education: [ While her father was carrying out random odds and ends jobs he would leave his precious Lisie in the care of a curator of the local children’s home. While there, she was taught to read and write. She learned of the Deities and morals and the basic rights from wrongs. Though she was never kept there long, Kartane would always come back for her as soon as he was able. ]
Relationship History: [ ;T She’s just a babin~ -covers her precious freckled ears-]
Future Plot: [ Youngling - Mainly just developing her relationship with her father and finding her place in society.
Prentice- After her father disappears, a new face arrives in town from a distant island known as Belrea. She takes an interest in him and eventually convinces the local mortician to hire him to replace Kartane. Talise finds the man has a wealth of knowledge about many things and becomes his apprentice.
Stage 2 - Her father returns to find Talise thriving on her own. She learns about his activities in Oba/ hides him from his pursuers/ eventually gets roped into helping his organization from afar.
**The possible return of her mother somewhere in stage 3-4** I'm really not sure if I will use this... It depends on if I want to Kill of Kartane in the future or not... If I do kill him, She won't reappear unless I need to induce the feels and it would be a "D,< now you show up?!" sort of journal and done. If I decide to let him live than she will return and try to get start a life with Kartane. As I've said, I really don't care what she did in the past, just let me know what I can do with her and we'll go from there.]
Other: [ Circle: Protection/Safety Triangle/arrow: Directional - Something lies in wait for you Square/rectangle: Trap - Immobilizing - something to impede your progress Polygon(5 or more sides): Hex - the more sides the more severe - sickness/death
“Fortune Telling”: Using a Limbara tooth and some white and black stones/wood/bone she mixes and scatters the items onto the earth to determine what it is in store for whoever holds the pleasure of playing with her~ ]
You're painting a very dark picture with this quest, and I'm not quite sure if it'll be able to work within Tendaji. There are a lot of questionable subjects, and some mistaken information in the quest and I think it would be best if the quest was addressed as a whole and rewritten to better fit what is allowed in Tendaji.
We appreciate the thought put into this particulate plot and history, but unfortunately we can't allow things like her father butchering people in their shed in the back, and her carving up animals as a child to really be allowed into Tendaji. It's a very dark subject and beyond the scope of quested characters.
In regards to her mother, children are chosen by the Sanctum to enter into the Sanctum and that's the only way in, so her mother running away to join the Sanctum wouldn't be able to be used as a plot device.
I’m not sure what the overall purpose of this plot was, but if you’re looking specifically to give her a reason to be interested in the dead or how the body works, we can suggest maybe designing a history where her father handles Yael’s dead for funeral rites? Like a mortician or something (though if you choose to work with something like this we ask that you get in contact with us so we can explain more how it works in Yael).
Posted: Thu Aug 17, 2017 9:16 pm
>;3 Okie dokie~
I didn't know what I could get away with so I went all in and figured I'd adjust from there.
The three main points I gathered were this: 1.) Her father can't butcher other earthlings 2.) She can't butcher creatures 3.) Sanctum stuff (I got a heads up so I'll explain this, but will develop plot-wise later in her stages.)
So, For Kartane butchering earthlings... (after talking with flan~)I tried to take out most of the implied parts of him Killing earthlings because the thought was for him to hide the bodies of assassinated earthlings killed by the assassins guild known as the Red Sand in Oba (Playing with plots of Flan's character Arkesh) The only way Kartane would actually "Kill" an earthling is if someone came asking and weren't deterred by his usual excuses (To which Talise could help shoo them off~) or they were close to discovering what it is he does out there(Or I thought If the Red Sands needed an extreme Interrogation method~(But I don't know that that would actually happen and if it did it would only happen once to trigger a growth with Talise; if it even happened at all)).
With Talise herself~ I imagined her mainly studying things that are already dead and not actually killing or harming anything; unless it was going to die anyway~ (Every kid finds dead things... she just is a little more curious about the dead things- she has to learn somehow!) The idea with her plot was for her to try to surgically remove and heal things rather than heal them magically. I wanted her to be a "Magic" Healer but I wanted the healing to take a toll... so if she could do it surgically then wrap it up with Magic/salves and such then that would be preferred for her. In order for her to not be like -I has all the knowledge just cuz!- I wanted to start her young on the whole anatomy stuff, so when she's in her stage 2 and doing surgery on something/someone there is a legit possibility it may save them, versus automatic death sentence.
I left stuff with her mother kind of vague because I was sincerely lacking knowledge of what ever "The Sanctum" Implied... I just was looking for a way to get her out of the storyline and make her "saintly and innocent"(Because that is what her parents wanted of her). Honestly, I'm okay with making her some harlot - "fallen from grace", that comes crawling back to the family she left behind because she can't stand looking at herself in the mirror one morning. As for the letter.... Well, she could have lied~ and will later admit to it! Like I said, I wanted to leave things vague so I can manipulate it later.
Talise's character skirts the edge of what was appropriate because she actually follows closish to the history of a character near and dear to my heart(with a couple extra underdeveloped characters mixed in~). I knew she was a bit dark going into this, so guide me along the ways of what is acceptable and I will work to fudge it to fit within the parameters of what the guild requires without compromising the guidelines of what I require out of her to fit the character I want. =w= Sound good?
I went through and edited some things, there is a key at the top of the post.
Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2017 7:47 am
akuma_kessaku
I’m still not really comfortable with the notion of a young child dissecting animals. At what age is she dissecting animals? Is it something she develops after a while, like 10-12 ish? Or is she going into this right off the bat cutting things open?
The quest still contains the part about her parents wanting the mother to be a priestess, and this is not canon within Tendaj. You would either need to explain why it is the parents are so insistent on pushing their daughter into a position they know can’t happen, or it will need to be edited out (I’m assuming it was an oversight). In that same vein, you mention that you wouldn’t mind if her character was changed to a harlot. We will need the quest to reflect what it is that she is actually going to be so we can continue to give feedback.
Why did Tavinia spend only one night with him and then disappear without any explanation? What was her reasoning?
Why did the mother not want her daughter? Why did she just drop the baby off with Kartane? You mention that her family also left for Pajore, why didn’t they take in their granddaughter?
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So, For Kartane butchering earthlings... (after talking with flan~)I tried to take out most of the implied parts of him Killing earthlings because the thought was for him to hide the bodies of assassinated earthlings killed by the assassins guild known as the Red Sand in Oba (Playing with plots of Flan's character Arkesh) The only way Kartane would actually "Kill" an earthling is if someone came asking and weren't deterred by his usual excuses (To which Talise could help shoo them off~) or they were close to discovering what it is he does out there(Or I thought If the Red Sands needed an extreme Interrogation method~(But I don't know that that would actually happen and if it did it would only happen once to trigger a growth with Talise; if it even happened at all)).
There is still a part in the quest where it mentions him killing and having victims that can be saved: "maybe they will have a similar anatomy to her father’s latest victim and she can help one escape someday”. With the idea now being that he doesn’t really kill people, just gets rid of the bodies, what are Talise's thoughts on this? She’s not seeing people being tortured, so how does this change her as a character now that it’s the “cleanup” so to speak? If he’s just dismantling bodies, why would she think he was a monster or mentally ill if it’s basically what she’s doing with her animals? (Taking apart something that’s already dead.) And why would she be so afraid of him? (“Should one of your characters find themselves on the receiving end of this trait… Well, the main thing would be to talk her down, explain she’s helping, but that you need further assistance… And pray like hell her father isn’t around.”)
Why would an Oban group choose to bring their bodies all the way over to Yael? It takes several days to make it to their shore, and they’re probably the most out of the way place you could choose to conduct business with, so why not someone in Oba, Jauhar, or Matori? (where it would be cost effective (not having to stock a ship for a three day journey) and faster)
Unfortunately, we can’t allow her to have the crystals mentioned in the description. (Small curled jagged protrusions on either side of her head.) If you look to the species page, the yaeli do not have the ability to be born with spiked/pointed crystals.
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and an intricate pattern on her abdomen/rib/back on the left side(will have to discuss with artist to see what can be done)
Any description for crystals should be included within the quest. Artists don’t have to reach out to an owner to discuss the physical appearance of the character, and all appearance details must be approved by staff before the quest can be accepted. If you are looking for something in particular, please include it in the quest.
biggrin Thanks for all the feedback~ I especially appreciate the quotes from my writing... Allows for quicker editing! <3 I find I have a hard time writing larger profiles like this when I know the character well because I have all the knowledge and as I type it out my mind sort of fills in the blanks and it doesn't always make it into the profile. So keep the critiques coming and I'll keep editing! Eventually, We'll have a masterpiece here~
I had started writing this with her being a prentice, but then I figured I haven't had a youngling yet, and it might be nice to have the extra stage so at some point in the chaos I switched it XP So I really don't care when she starts it. I can agree that someone that young wouldn't really be dissecting, per se. And in all seriousness, I would be using her youngling stage to develop her relationship with her father... and maybe have an interest in helping injured things. So I would say her Prentice stage would be more when she begins actually trying to figure out the inner workings and see if there is a way to help without magic.
Yeah, I missed that part about Tavinia. I went back and edited it to Devote herself to the Sanctum... Would it be out of line for her parents to want her to be a faithful servant of their gods? Faith and I sought out knowledge on the Sanctum, It's a large structure involving an inner and outer sanctum. Priest/ess's are the only ones allowed in the inner and their families and such in the outer? All players are impacted by the sanctum in some... sort... of way? Would It be out of line for her parents to hope for her to serve in the outer sanctum in whatever way? She decides the life is too mundane for her and she leaves.
As for her having a one night stand with Kartane... Well, Her parents wanted her to be a saintly servant of the sanctum, and Kartane/his family situation/their present life at the outskirts of society, isn't what they pictured for their precious little girl. Tavinia loved Kartane, but had nothing without her parents, she wanted to give him something before going off and following her parents' plans.
As for the baby, her parents would be pissed she had it because they were polite to Kartane... They didn't exactly like him (but considering where he came from, their politeness came off as caring to him.). Depending on how stuff with the sanctum goes, she could still be attempting to make a life for herself in the outer sanctum and doesn't want a youngling to skew their view of her OR she couldn't make a life for herself in the outer sanctum, when she refused to out right kill the child, her parents left her. The life she was struggling to make for herself in Pajore isn't the life she wanted her child to endure, so she sent her to Kartane.
Why Kartane? Simply put, He's the child's father.... She doesn't have to worry about Kartane's family influencing her because they're dead, and Tavinia loved(es) him and trusts he will provide for her.
Talise would never be afraid of her father. She would be afraid for the safety of others in her father's presence. I plan on having Kartane's mental health slowly deteriorate as Talise grows, and as that happens she will fear that her father would do anything to "protect" her - even when she doesn't need protecting. Example: She has a misunderstanding with someone and they raise their voice at her. Kartane would get upset and get in the person's face which could quickly escalate into violence and she is afraid for not only the person but what they could do to her father - say he seriously injures them, he may feel as though he has to kill them to keep them quiet. If it's in public he may be taken away from her, and he would fight to stay with her only making the situation worse which may lead to killing him in the struggle to subdue him.
D: Make sense? In the cited quote: “Should one of your characters find themselves on the receiving end of this trait… Well, the main thing would be to talk her down, explain she’s helping, but that you need further assistance… And pray like hell her father isn’t around.” She would be afraid of what her father could potentially perceive the situation to be and how he could worsen it. Talise would likely try to stash the player somewhere until her father left again or attempt to sneak them out of the house without her father's knowledge of them ever being there.
As for why Yael - Short answer? I wanted her to be Yaeli and it fit the story. Being as it is several days travel with dead corpses... Well, that complicates things. It could be that it is only high profile targets that get sent out there, maybe they kidnap them, and kill them in transit and Kartane takes it from there. Honestly, I haven't been able to work out that detail with the other half of the plot and I won't be able to give that detail until they return. So In the meantime, I assume they buy his silence and he takes local temp-work, or he could be a grave digger. It's up in the air at the moment.
For Crystals, Heh, I must have greatly skewed what Rough meant? I liked the concept and the character she is based off of has horns like that, so I wanted to see what I could do. If you're adamant she can't have them then I will have to wait for her legendary stage. It is what it is.
I have an idea of what I want to do with my crystals, but my lack of artistic ability makes it hard for me to explain. I would love to attempt to collaborate with an artist to get what I am thinking out, but the person I would normally collaborate with is on hiatus and If I'm not allowed to collaborate with the artist when the time comes then scratch it- it's not something necessary to the character. I just figured I could try to get out of whatever stigma I have with this crystal concept.
I'll revisit the "horn" concept and edit it... and she can have that and the round crystal in her neck.
P.S. - I keep going back and reading this because I knew there was something I missed. So far as can be said for the moment, Tavinia has nothing to do with Talise's life and will continue to not have anything to do with her until a later stage(3ish maybe?) in her life. I am not certain in what way she will come back into her life or what her history will be like. Tavinia is a plot device I plan on using when the time is right. I was spitballing ideas of what could be done and her history will be developed later through journals if I chose to even keep her alive. Fair?
Posted: Fri Sep 01, 2017 2:41 pm
akuma_kessaku
Just so you are aware so it's not a surprise later on (in regards to the crystals), legendary stages still have guidelines of what is acceptable per race, so being a legendary still wouldn't allow for her crystals to grow/change or become horns. (The Stages and Growth thread has information on what changes are appropriate for each race.)
It might seem nitpicky but I don't want you to get involved with the idea with expectations that aren't allowed within the world.
Believe it or not, I did read through the species information and the stages and growth thread before starting this quest. The Toxin or pollutant attribute somehow translated to Mutation in my mind... And while it does seem rather nitpicky (mainly because there are no listed examples or guidelines other than staff approved) I appreciate you not wanting me to entertain the ideas of something that may not be allowed. While my mind wanders with all the possibilities that this mysterious trait may hold I have one major roadblock; I have to get to the legendary stage first... Which will take years.
Suhuba
I'm sorry if this comes off as somewhat snarky, but I'm frustrated and just putting this out there to try and explain myself. If you want to give clarification of the toxin trait that's fine, but I'm really not going to worry about until it happens.
Also~ If you're going to tell me that something isn't allowed (plotwise or traitwise) since you already have an idea of what I want, perhaps making some suggestions as to what is allowed would be more productive... rather than me just spewing more ideas that may or may not be allowed.
Example: You had a problem with Kartane murdering people so you suggested he deal with funeral rites; which was a good idea, it just didn't fit his character - it's too sane, too normal. But! It inspired the idea that he could take on temp work as a gravedigger! So it was productive and helped develop his character in a way. I would love more suggestions rather than - that's not allowed, we can't allow that, It doesn't fit the species.
Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2017 7:53 am
Alright, Using the given references for crystals for the yaeli race I fashioned an idea of what I was thinking other than the jagged crystals I initially wanted:
I was looking for a bust reference with hair and it's not perfect, but it's the best I am capable of. Hopefully, it gives you all enough of an idea to figure out what it is I have going through my head. The idea for it was to be a band of crystals, so I don't know if it has to be set back and distorted slightly to fit just right but the general placement and the shape is there.
Hey Akuma. Have a couple of questions for you, there was a lot to read through and the main quest didn't seem to contain alll of the information so if I missed something I apologize.
1. So how does Talise even start disecting things in the first place? It's not really a normal activity for kids/prentices so what caused her to start?
2. If her father tries to keep his job from her, how does she find out? Especially if bodies are being brought from Oba they would be pretty difficult to hide the smell.
3. Surely since he wants to keep his activities away from Talise he must know it's not something that's really normal so why doesn't he discourage her disecting/taxidermy?
4. Why are the Keldari different for her? I understand that they're the most available to her but why does she not have the same care for them as she would for other things she finds injured?
5. Is there a point in which her "care" comes to an end? If she's caring for something (that's not a Keldari) does she hit a point in which she gets impatient and kills it? And after (if so) how does she feel? If something she was caring for dies does she continue on as she would if it were a keldari?
6. How do these things translate to how she interacts with people? You said that once she bottles up shell go pray but does her relation ship with people change and along with it her feelings?
7. I got the perception that she tries to protect people from her father, but does it go the other way and tries to protect her father from other people?
I understand that Flan's characters history / plot plays an important part in what it is that her father does, I too find it difficult to justify sending dead bodies across the sea when it would do just as well to dump them overboard. If you'd like to message me on AIM sometime we can try to put our heads together. Ofc I don't know what flan has in mind for Arkesh but I offer my help regardless.
Sorry if anything doesn't make sense. I had a lot of thoughts and typing this up on my phone might have made them become kind of disjointed.
Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2017 7:57 pm
Nilah44
Thanks for your imput~ I am going to answer to the best of my ability, but do not hesitate to ask if something isn't clear or if I misinterpret what it is you're asking.
Also, If you are seeing something in the critiques that isn't reflected in her profile - and think it should be - let me know so I can adjust accordingly. I have been going back and editing things in and out according to my critiques... the only thing I don't think I have mentioned is how her healing abilities will impact her and its currently not applicable because she is incapable of healing~
But anything else, let me know.
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1. So how does Talise even start disecting things in the first place? It's not really a normal activity for kids/prentices so what caused her to start?
Maybe dissecting seems odd for a child(<12) I give you that, but a prentice is age 14-18. I was dissecting worms, sheep eyes, frogs in 7th grade! (And I’m not the only one.) I had someone inform me that they dissected frogs in elementary school. We also extensively dissected a rat in our 10th grade biology class. Through our Biology class our entire high school (open to all grades 9-12) was offered the opportunity to take a field trip to the Body World Science Exhibit that was human corpses stripped of their flesh for science, Organs… all stages of life(embryo to elderly). I’m not sure what sort of issue staff has with this “odd theory” of dissection and the study of anatomy, but how else is she supposed to learn?
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2. If her father tries to keep his job from her, how does she find out? Especially if bodies are being brought from Oba they would be pretty difficult to hide the smell.
As stated above I hadn’t considered the distance from Oba to Yael and until the other half of my plot is back(or I will gladly bounce ideas off you and appreciate the offer!) I have no solution for the stench other than he would continue with temp work in the graveyard until I can work that part of his plot out. As for how she would find out… She’s in a house alone and her father goes out to the shed and says don’t follow. Sure, she’ll listen for a while but there is going to come a time where either life requires her to get her father from the shack, or her curiosity gets the better of her and she goes to explore for herself. (I had a bit in her profile somewhere about her looking through a window and praying for his “victims” but I’m pretty sure I edited it out considering he isn’t actually killing anyone.)
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3. Surely since he wants to keep his activities away from Talise he must know it's not something that's really normal so why doesn't he discourage her disecting/taxidermy?
He does realize the impact of what his “occupation” could have on his child and therefore tries to keep her from it, but what Talise is doing isn’t wrong. The creatures are not alive when she is studying them (and she doesn't kill them to begin studying them) and taxidermy is not a foreign art. He would have no reason to interfere with what she was doing; He could inquire, but I don't see him stopping her.
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4. Why are the Keldari different for her? I understand that they're the most available to her but why does she not have the same care for them as she would for other things she finds injured?
So I’m a bit perplexed as to how you drew this conclusion, so utilized the Ctrl+F function and searched for 'Keldari'. The only time it comes up in my profile is three times in the Hobbies and Occupations sections.
Talise's Profile
Hobbies: [ Taxidermy, playing operation on recently dead things to figure out how they work/what killed them, drawing/studying creature anatomy- namely keldari(about the only thing she can get her mitts on), playing with Keldari - feeding them certain crystals to see how it changes them- inside and out~ ]
Occupation(s): [ (youth)Keldari Wrangler : More like a hobby than anything, really~ ]
At no point do I mention that she treats them any differently than any other creature; she cares for them just as she would any other creature. I’m not sure what gave you the impression that she would harm them intentionally(If you could let me know so I can clear that up that would be appreciated because I don’t want to paint the wrong impression). As for why I chose them for her to have an interest in… I was looking at my choice of wildlife (haven’t made it all the way through flora and fauna as of yet because when I was writing this I just used the familiar chart as a quick reference to get an idea of what she could examine in Yael.) and everything else could either eat her or do some serious damage. That and I’m actually quite intrigued about the crystals they eat and how it helps developing their skeletal structure. Their diet impacts them both inside and out and I believe she would take an interest in that.
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Is there a point in which her "care" comes to an end? If she's caring for something (that's not a Keldari) does she hit a point in which she gets impatient and kills it? And after (if so) how does she feel? If something she was caring for dies does she continue on as she would if it were a keldari?
She was intended to be a healer… with a catch. Her healing comes at a price of her own health (I’m thinking it’s going to be a psychological thing; like sympathy pain. She doesn’t actually get physically hurt, but she feels pain similar to the person/thing she is trying to heal with magic(so stage 2+). This is something that will develop over time and drive her to attempt to heal people through other means, and not turn straight to magic.) Prior to her stage 2 she will be learning and most likely examining the corpses of dead thing… not necessarily trying to help stuff, but if she got the opportunity to help she wouldn’t hit a point where her “care” comes to an end. If she can help she wants to help. However, once she discovers that she has the ability to mend people/creatures with magic, there will be a point where she will have to consider her own threshold vs the life of her patient. Talise will do whatever she can to help, heal, mend, but if it gets too painful she will have to find that balance between what she can do without magic and what she has to heal magically and make that call when the time comes.
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6. How do these things translate to how she interacts with people? You said that once she bottles up shell go pray but does her relation ship with people change and along with it her feelings?
I will need you to elaborate. Give me a scenario or something because I have read this question a couple times and I don’t think I’m fully grasping what you’re asking of me. XP I’m sorry. ** I'ma take a crack at this...
- So, If you are curious about what causes her to get upset I would like to refer you to her dislikes.
- If you are curious about how she would interact with other playable characters in RP I would say you'd have to approve her to give me a chance to figure that out or give me a situation to reply to because it honestly depends on the context of what we're dealing with.
- If you're curious about how I would interact with her through Journals and with the people in town... I say this: Her father/family are generally viewed as outcasts, and going off of how superstitious the Yaelian race is I'm going to assume that most people would avoid her, other than people who would "know her and her situation" (maybe it's someone her father has done temp work for, or a family friend.) On the off chance, she does interact with someone outside of the small circle of people familiar with her and her situation, I would say a high percentage of them would be negative(would fall under her dislikes category) and most of it she can brush off, but if someone were to continue to prod her about her interests and how "weird" she is, she would shut down and withdraw; if they pursued her and continued she would make them stop through physical confrontation (she usually aims for the nose - hurts like hell and causes instant tears, so they can no longer and would most likely no longer desire to follow her.) She's not one to try to justify herself to someone who's just being ignorant - she likes what she likes and she has her reasons for pursuing her interests.
As for prayer... Many religious people find peace in prayer. Considering how religious the race is, in general, I think she would find comfort in speaking with a "higher power" who understands her and loves her for who she is - despite her differences. Maybe her lack of resolve through continuous prayer is what turns her off of Lurin - gives her the feeling of being cast out or forgotten, and causes her to turn more to Dafiel.
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7. I got the perception that she tries to protect people from her father, but does it go the other way and tries to protect her father from other people?
I would most definitely say it goes both ways. She loves her father and wouldn’t want anything bad to happen to him; XD no matter what sort of shady s**t he’s involved in!
1. So how does Talise even start disecting things in the first place? It's not really a normal activity for kids/prentices so what caused her to start?
Maybe dissecting seems odd for a child(<12) I give you that, but a prentice is age 14-18. I was dissecting worms, sheep eyes, frogs in 7th grade! (And I’m not the only one.) I had someone inform me that they dissected frogs in elementary school. We also extensively dissected a rat in our 10th grade biology class. Through our Biology class our entire high school (open to all grades 9-12) was offered the opportunity to take a field trip to the Body World Science Exhibit that was human corpses stripped of their flesh for science, Organs… all stages of life(embryo to elderly). I’m not sure what sort of issue staff has with this “odd theory” of dissection and the study of anatomy, but how else is she supposed to learn?
I think this is where the disconnect between us on your quest is occuring: assuming that the Tendajians learn things at the same rate that we now learn things. While we might do such things (as I did too while in middle/high school) learning and medicine in Tendaji does not work in the same manner. While some places in Tendaji may have "schools" (I glanced through an rp the other day of someone having a school of magic) but those are opened by individuals. There is no standard of education so just because someone is a certain age does not mean they will learn certain things. Knowledge, for the first bit of life, is normally shared by family or perhaps a religious leader (as you had in your quest with the person teaching her letters and how to read). Past that initial knowledge, Tendaji is very much an "apprentice/master" learning style. (In exception to perhaps the races on Balrea). Therefore, pretty much anything else is taught to the child/teen by someone that already has knowledge of the subject. Sure there are plenty of things that someone might pick up on their own. But with something, as even you stated, socially unacceptable (as you mentioned other Yaeli shy away from her because of it), I'm not sure I understand how she would have started if not watching her father which you seem reluctant to connect those dots.
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2. If her father tries to keep his job from her, how does she find out? Especially if bodies are being brought from Oba they would be pretty difficult to hide the smell.
As stated above I hadn’t considered the distance from Oba to Yael and until the other half of my plot is back(or I will gladly bounce ideas off you and appreciate the offer!) I have no solution for the stench other than he would continue with temp work in the graveyard until I can work that part of his plot out. As for how she would find out… She’s in a house alone and her father goes out to the shed and says don’t follow. Sure, she’ll listen for a while but there is going to come a time where either life requires her to get her father from the shack, or her curiosity gets the better of her and she goes to explore for herself. (I had a bit in her profile somewhere about her looking through a window and praying for his “victims” but I’m pretty sure I edited it out considering he isn’t actually killing anyone.)
Yeah I didn't see anything about how she finds out. Would you mind finalizing how she actually does? I feel this would help with the 1st question of mine as you might be able to get a solid reason of "why" she begins doing what she does.
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4. Why are the Keldari different for her? I understand that they're the most available to her but why does she not have the same care for them as she would for other things she finds injured?
So I’m a bit perplexed as to how you drew this conclusion, so utilized the Ctrl+F function and searched for 'Keldari'. The only time it comes up in my profile is three times in the Hobbies and Occupations sections.
Talise's Profile
Hobbies: [ Taxidermy, playing operation on recently dead things to figure out how they work/what killed them, drawing/studying creature anatomy- namely keldari(about the only thing she can get her mitts on), playing with Keldari - feeding them certain crystals to see how it changes them- inside and out~ ]
Occupation(s): [ (youth)Keldari Wrangler : More like a hobby than anything, really~ ]
At no point do I mention that she treats them any differently than any other creature; she cares for them just as she would any other creature. I’m not sure what gave you the impression that she would harm them intentionally(If you could let me know so I can clear that up that would be appreciated because I don’t want to paint the wrong impression). As for why I chose them for her to have an interest in… I was looking at my choice of wildlife (haven’t made it all the way through flora and fauna as of yet because when I was writing this I just used the familiar chart as a quick reference to get an idea of what she could examine in Yael.) and everything else could either eat her or do some serious damage. That and I’m actually quite intrigued about the crystals they eat and how it helps developing their skeletal structure. Their diet impacts them both inside and out and I believe she would take an interest in that.
The below quote is what I saw that made me get that assumption.
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She doesn't care for them and then suddenly kill them because she's curious.
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6. How do these things translate to how she interacts with people? You said that once she bottles up shell go pray but does her relation ship with people change and along with it her feelings?
I will need you to elaborate. Give me a scenario or something because I have read this question a couple times and I don’t think I’m fully grasping what you’re asking of me. XP I’m sorry. ** I'ma take a crack at this...
- So, If you are curious about what causes her to get upset I would like to refer you to her dislikes.
- If you are curious about how she would interact with other playable characters in RP I would say you'd have to approve her to give me a chance to figure that out or give me a situation to reply to because it honestly depends on the context of what we're dealing with.
- If you're curious about how I would interact with her through Journals and with the people in town... I say this: Her father/family are generally viewed as outcasts, and going off of how superstitious the Yaelian race is I'm going to assume that most people would avoid her, other than people who would "know her and her situation" (maybe it's someone her father has done temp work for, or a family friend.) On the off chance, she does interact with someone outside of the small circle of people familiar with her and her situation, I would say a high percentage of them would be negative(would fall under her dislikes category) and most of it she can brush off, but if someone were to continue to prod her about her interests and how "weird" she is, she would shut down and withdraw; if they pursued her and continued she would make them stop through physical confrontation (she usually aims for the nose - hurts like hell and causes instant tears, so they can no longer and would most likely no longer desire to follow her.) She's not one to try to justify herself to someone who's just being ignorant - she likes what she likes and she has her reasons for pursuing her interests.
As for prayer... Many religious people find peace in prayer. Considering how religious the race is, in general, I think she would find comfort in speaking with a "higher power" who understands her and loves her for who she is - despite her differences. Maybe her lack of resolve through continuous prayer is what turns her off of Lurin - gives her the feeling of being cast out or forgotten, and causes her to turn more to Dafiel.
Okay so like she's antisocial and also has a temper if the person doesn't back down. So if she gets in a confrontation with someone, after its over, does she hold grudges? Does she forgive the person easily? Does she avoid the person etc.
I think I expanded my original questions that I still was curious about. Please excuse if there are any errors as I worked on this a couple of times <3
Posted: Tue Sep 12, 2017 5:38 pm
Since you guys are discussing things I won't interrupt as I think a lot of the questions for me have been resolved at this point. However I did have one random thought which is totally just a light suggestion (more a thing of curiosity at this point) was there a specific reason to not make this family Oban? It would place them close to the Oban plots you are wanting and also allow for the horns in legendary.
Obviously Yaeli are awesome and adorable and I'm definitely not telling you to change her, but I was just curious is all. ^^ And it can be as easy as saying that you just really wanted a Yaeli, but since you were wanting suggestions that was the idea which crossed my mind.
For dissecting perhaps it could be more easily believed if she ran across something decaying in the wilds? Maybe seeing that got her attention....though I could see many children being too grossed out or thinking it's spooky (especially in Yael with all the superstitions they have). Still it's a suggestion.
Since you guys are discussing things I won't interrupt as I think a lot of the questions for me have been resolved at this point. However I did have one random thought which is totally just a light suggestion (more a thing of curiosity at this point) was there a specific reason to not make this family Oban? It would place them close to the Oban plots you are wanting and also allow for the horns in legendary.
Obviously Yaeli are awesome and adorable and I'm definitely not telling you to change her, but I was just curious is all. ^^ And it can be as easy as saying that you just really wanted a Yaeli, but since you were wanting suggestions that was the idea which crossed my mind.
For dissecting perhaps it could be more easily believed if she ran across something decaying in the wilds? Maybe seeing that got her attention....though I could see many children being too grossed out or thinking it's spooky (especially in Yael with all the superstitions they have). Still it's a suggestion.
XD That would definitely make things easier when it came to her traits, wouldn't it~
I made her Yaelian because 1) I don't have one yet >3~ 2) I like the idea of all the superstition and the different plot twists I can make with it ( Mainly just giving her more quirky behaviors ) 3) When reading about the race I wanted to create a family that played off the backstory on how they came to be. Namely: "Yael was once the destination of those cast off in exile from the mainland of Tendaji. The outcasts, the hybrids, the criminals, and the mentally unwell were shipped off to the coast of Yael, left to either figure out a way to survive, or die off." - Yes, they evolved over generations, but for some odd reason the idea drew me in and... well, here we are and I'm too damn stubborn to turn back and change it now X3
As for her coming across decaying things - I sort of started with that in mind and should she come across a massive skeletal corpse of a limbara, assuming it wasn't too rotted and gross, she would definitely explore it. However, Decaying things actually kind of really gross me out... the whole maggots eating flesh and just eeesh~ -shutters- Freshly dead or like mummified or preserved in something...
