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 Posted: Tue Jul 12, 2016 10:36 am
Who: Cesc (Atmadja) and Ethiriel (NeonMace)
When: Early April, 2016
Where: Vermillion Bakery
Weather: Sunny and warm.
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Posted: Tue Jul 12, 2016 10:43 am
It had been a few days since Henry came back from the hectic viewing at the Lab -- Ethiriel had finally found herself well enough to leave the house, both energy-wise and for her guardian's comfort. The nurse remained worried despite his attempts to keep from smothering the newly-grown Sigel, but she assured him everything was fine and that she was ready to get out and about. With Nedhudir in tow, the Raevan set out on a mission.
Listening to the GPS in her phone and her collie to guide her from danger, Ethiriel traversed Gambino to find a certain someone she had promised to see after her trip to the cabins with Candice and her students. The walk was calm, quiet, and very comfortable now that the warm days of spring were upon them. The Raevan enjoyed this weather the most.
By the time she reached Vermillion Bakery, Ethiriel managed to catch a familiar scent in the air: fresh baked goods and the aroma of a certain stag. This must have meant he wasn't in the building -- the Sigel remembered that Cesc enjoyed working out in the bakery's garage, and the closer she got to the shop, the more Ethiriel was able to sense of his presence. Upon the entrance of the garage, the Raevan quietly commanded Nedhudir to sit before lightly leaning against the threshold's frame.
"I hope I am not interrupting," Ethiriel said, her voice soft yet strong. Her smile was gentle and her brows knit together lightly as she stared in Cesc's general direction. She had remained in the outfit she grew in, figuring it would be a good way to show off her newly formed stomach.
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Posted: Wed Jul 13, 2016 8:05 pm
Cesc's hands were wrapped, his wings were folded, and he faced a Heavy bag with a determined expression. There was music blasting in the garage, upbeat and with tempo, his phone plugged into a set of speakers.
He hit the bag with rhythm, once, then twice in succession. He'd just barely begun the workout, only having warmed up and wrapped his knuckles for a session before hearing a soft voice filter into his thoughts. Cesc turned toward the garage just as Ethiriel began to address him.
Rhedefre could hardly believe his eyes. He stayed in his pose, stunned, his arms up, the bag still swaying gently. His eyes rounded and his jaw slackened as he looked at her, the reality of what he saw slowly descending on him like a mist. Remembering he needed to speak, he managed only a sputtered cry.
She was lovely. Her face matured, but her skin was smooth and unblemished and perfect as the silk that now encased her arms and fell. When Cesc had seen Ethiriel for the first time in his life, he'd thought her regal--but this was a princess ascending to queen. Her crown had rightfully, fittingly grown. Her wings sported buds. Her nails, unimpeachable, perfect, silver.
He felt suddenly too sweaty and too--too wrong to be seeing her at Sigel for the first time. Immediately, he came forward, then jerked to a stop and pulled his phone off the speakers to make the music quiet.
"Eth-- you--" Rhedefre gasped. How unlike the last time he'd seen her! How she'd blossomed anew, like a hardy plant after frost. And, like he had with Zurine before her, he had a sudden, impossible, idiotic idea that he should kiss her.
That is not the right reaction to growth, you idiot-- he thought irritably. He came forward, closer to her.
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Posted: Wed Jul 13, 2016 8:24 pm
Cesc's silence did little to calm Ethiriel's nerves -- she was fully aware that things were strange between them since their last meeting and worried that perhaps he was upset with her. The silence of the music was abrupt and caused her to raise her brows, but the stag's stuttered speech made her smile soften. "I'm sorry I came without invitation or warning. I just... I really wanted to see you again. I fell ill before I could."
Pushing herself away from the garage door, Ethiriel hovered a tad closer, herself; an arm out reaching for the stag. Self-consciousness still powered her movements -- she felt so much more confident at Sigel now, but she didn't know the air between them. His silence, stunned, only served to gnaw at her newly formed stomach.
"I... I wanted to apologize. The last time we spoke, we... I had been childish. I lashed out at you when you didn't deserve it."
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Posted: Wed Jul 13, 2016 8:30 pm
As Eth reached her arm out, Cesc closed the distance, allowing her hand to fall onto his forearm. He put his own hand over hers, covering her fingers with his palm. The scratchiness of the tape brushed against her skin.
"Hey, no," said Rhedefre, his voice soft. He smiled at her, and the gentleness and warmth of that expression could be heard in his words as he spoke. "Don't even think about that. Don't worry about that. Look at you now! Look at how amazing you look. You really do look amazing. I can't even think of another word. You earned this, you really, really did. I'm--I'm really proud of you, Eth."
That moment, her outburst--it seemed like an eternity had passed since then. With her arrival now, a stunning Sigel, Cesc felt like he could have forgiven ten times worse for the outcome that had come to pass. She was not a picture of self-assurance and calmness; no, not yet, but she had some greater grace in her movements than she had before.
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Posted: Wed Jul 13, 2016 8:59 pm
All the nerves between them shooed away once they made contact, her fingers curling around Cesc's wrist as he cupped his hand over hers. Ethiriel couldn't help but smile wider, easily meeting her eyes. The feeling of the wrapping on his wrists was interesting and she found herself enjoying the sensation.
"Thank you, Rhede... It means a lot to hear you say that," said Ethiriel as she pulled herself closer, bending her arms at the elbow to close the distance. The necklace given to her by Cesc rested squarely at her sternum, glistening like her crown and branches. "It is so good to see you again. It feels like it has been forever..."
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Posted: Wed Jul 13, 2016 10:15 pm
He smiled at her. It did feel like it had been forever. And that time stretched longer when he thought of the difference between now and their last meeting. His mind tried to supply him with others: Lazarus, Zurine--they had ended up alright as well, hadn't they? Growth was the prize for that suffering.
It made him a little lightheaded to think it. Would that they could all stay in their current state of growth, if that was the case!
"It has been forever. I can't tell you how glad I am to see you, even just up and about--even if you hadn't grown!" He laughed. He noticed the necklace he'd given her on her neck and suddenly, he was acutely aware of the closeness of their posture. It made the hair on the back of his neck rise, his heart quicken in his chest. A pinprick of guilt plucked at him.
I was jealous... she'd said.
"Have you celebrated yet?" he asked. "How long has it been?"
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Posted: Thu Jul 14, 2016 9:57 am
"I'm glad to be up and about as well!" Ethiriel chuckled, her grip on Cesc's hand tightening just a bit. Her mind swirled over her confession, as well, and their closeness hadn't gone unnoticed by her either. Despite her nerves pulling at her heart, she didn't want to pull away, to have distance between them.
I was jealous...
It still reigned true.
Her smile had slipped, but as soon as Cesc spoke up again it had been replaced -- still natural and soft. "I have not... I caught a cold from being lost in the woods in the middle of the night... but I am better now, so don't worry!" she corrected herself, showing her teeth in a dazzling smile. "Only a couple weeks ago... in maybe the second or third week of March, I believe."
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Posted: Wed Sep 28, 2016 7:42 pm
A gentle frown clouded Cesc's expression then: "Aw, I'm sorry to hear that," he murmured at the start of her sentence, but as she smiled, he mirrored the expression--not as bright, no, but still there. Was her illness some lingering after-effect of the circumstances of her growth?
He wet his lips. He was unsure of how to proceed, half his mind spinning its wheels elsewhere, the other half of him guiltily unsure of how to let go of her hands and put distance between them again without seeming rude or abrupt. It seemed unfair to her, somehow, to hold her hand, to stand so close...
"Well, I'm happy to see you well and about," he said.
"What are you, ah, hoping to do to celebrate? A party? Invite all your favorite people? Taste some cupcakes, finally?"
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Posted: Wed Sep 28, 2016 7:59 pm
Ethiriel hummed in response, but eventually her smile faded and her brows fell as she glanced away. Much like Cesc, the silver Raevan's mind was also whirring with apprehension and whether or not to add distance -- she wanted to pretend that everything was okay, that nothing had changed, but... so much had changed. While things were okay in general, the situation wasn't.
It felt wrong as it ate at her stomach.
"Maybe..." Ethiriel chuckled, hesitantly pulling herself away as if she could read Cesc's mind. It was clear that, now that they had a moment's peace, her thoughts were eating at her. Finally, the Sigel's smile faded entirely as she took a breath.
It was now or never.
Taking another deep breath, Ethiriel closed her eyes and attempted to smile again, but it was forced -- unnatural. "It..." she started, clasping her hands before her ribbon. "It is... another time." She hoped to God he would remember the push -- thinking about that day in her dark room was still enough to make the Raevan cringe, and while this meeting was originally meant to be cheerful and happy, she knew it had to be talked about.
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Posted: Wed Sep 28, 2016 8:06 pm
He watched her pull away, and his heart began to beat more quickly in his chest, loud enough that he felt she might be able to hear it. He looked down, blinking rapidly, pulling his lips between his teeth. There was so much space, so much silence, so much that wasn't being said. It felt like an event horizon that they were slowly being pulled toward--inevitable but agonizing.
Cesc drew a breath.
"Ethiriel," he said at last, quietly, steadily. "Is there... no." He paused, swallowed. "There's... something else we probably... should talk about, isn't there?"
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Posted: Wed Sep 28, 2016 8:18 pm
As Cesc hesitated, stumbling on his words, Ethiriel could feel the subtle twitches of her expression as she fought to keep her eyes closed. Her hands snaked up her own arms until they were crossed before her stomach.
"What...?" Ethiriel asked, opening her eyes just a tad; there was no silver for her to find, nothing to lock eyes with -- part of her was glad about this... meeting silver was like meeting an eye, and she wasn't sure she could do it just yet. Even without sight, the Sigel refused to look towards Cesc while the knot in her stomach grew. "I think... this is rather important..."
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Posted: Wed Sep 28, 2016 8:27 pm
Why was he surprised? She had always been guarded. For him, the words had crawled up his throat and paused only long enough to wait for her, to give her a chance to say it first. Cesc watched her, his own gaze steady. The event horizon had come for him. There was no turning back now.
"Yes," he said softly, coming closer. "Eth, that... that day, you'd said... you'd said you were jealous...?"
He was prompting. He was begging. His heart sped, blood and adrenaline coursing through his veins: just get it over with. Just get it over with. Let her say it, let them move on, let him...
... let him...
Aina's eyes filled with tears of disappointment and distress. She asked, weren't they going to be friends anymore? Wasn't Miss Ethiriel going to be so, so sad?
Cesc held his breath.
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Posted: Wed Sep 28, 2016 8:34 pm
While it felt like her lungs wouldn't allow it, Ethiriel forced a breath again at Cesc's goading. He knew, he understood. Already, fearing what was to happen next, the Sigel felt tears burn at her eyes as she took another shaky breath, trying to find the words.
After what felt like several minutes, the Raevan gave a nod.
"I... Rhede..." she paused, closing her eyes tight, face reddening. "When... when I saw you kiss Zurine..." so passionately, "...it hurt. I didn't expect it to, but... it did. Rhedefre, I... I have liked you for quite some time. A-and I... I don't expect you to return my feelings, but..."
The tears finally pooled over, her voice drenched in emotion.
"Just... treat Zurine right..."
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Posted: Wed Sep 28, 2016 8:56 pm
The garage suddenly felt very large and very still. His heart continued its mad climb, blood rushing in his ears, but all warmth whooshed away from his fingers and ears and cheeks. He felt cold, and strange, and raw, and small.
"W...wait," he said, swallowing dryly. "That's not..." He paused, running his fingers through his hair. "Eth, you're right, I did, I did kiss her. I did. But that was a mistake. That was... just... dumb... " He paused, shaking his head. "Never mind that. I'm sorry you saw that, and I'm so, so sorry it hurt you. But it's not... she and I aren't together. You shouldn't torture yourself about that, or about being big enough to ask me to treat her right or--or whatever. This is about you, and your feelings, and... "
He swallowed, listening to his heartbeat, watching Ethiriel's expression change, the tears sliding down her reddened cheeks. This wasn't what he wanted to be doing, not now, not ever. To stand here, to make things worse--
"And, Eth..." his voice became gentle. "I... I'm... I'm really, really flattered. You're one of the best, most beautiful, most gentle, kind and thoughtful people I know." He reached out, putting a soft hand on her forearm. "Please know that, alright? I will always believe that, because that's just who you are."
He drew in a soft breath. "But me, Eth, I am a mess. And romance and relationships and that-- it's not been fun for me, or easy for me, or any of that. And if you don't mind me being a little bit of a jerk, in a lot of ways, you're kind of a mess, yourself." He laughed a little, although it was a careful, helpless kind of sound. "I don't want to get into that. I don't know myself well enough to promise you I could be good to you or to anyone else, and I want... I want us to be friends, because I know we can be good like that. Is that fair? Is that alright?"
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