Kouhei had spoken all he needed to. As such, he felt that he didn’t have to defend himself any further. How wrong he was. It seems that Jean-Luc knew of the arrancar that held court in Kouhei’s fiefdom. Knew him by name. That would have been a problem for the captain to try and mitigate in another environment. At the moment, it seems that the infectious nature of rage had taken root. Kouhei was now nearly as incensed as his commanding officer. The only solace that he took was that this was taking place in a closet somewhere. That meant it was informal. A formal hearing and official action would require documentation and an office. Witnesses. No, this was being kept private. Kouhei wasn’t fool enough to imagine that made it alright to drop the ranks, but it did give him a shred of room that this was not his end. Jean-Luc chose to take them somewhere private and rather cramped to have this out. Perhaps he didn’t want to have such conversations with prying ears. Perhaps he couldn’t afford dissention in the ranks. Still- this was spinning out of control. The captain had tried to calm down, but the moment blame was landed upon him from the mishap that turned Miya into a vaizard in the first place, all hope of calming down was gone. His head leaned forward slightly, and what was once a look of wide-eyed anger became a piercing glare of rage. Oddly enough, he felt a twinge in his soul. That same twinge from the 3rd. the twinge of wanting a fight from the spider in his soul. This time was different, though. This time was against somebody that was his superior and likely his better. Kouhei was able to keep that thought in mind to keep his hand off his weapon; barely.
He did what he often did, he listened. Jean-Luc went from the blame of Miya to the promotion of an arrancar. He seriously blamed Kouhei for Miya. That explained a bit . . . this was becoming personal. That’s why it was in private, why it was unsanctioned. Jean-Luc needed the privacy to actually be angry. Fine. Kouhei can be angry as well. He listened as his decisions were torn apart by the captain commander, an unblinking stare and unmoving body tensed in anger, doing all he could to maintain his closed mouth and sublimated reiatsu. Then came the accusation of playing the wounded bird, and how he was not the only one that lost. Then came the worst of the lot. He was blamed for the loss of the 12th. Jean-Luc actually said he didn’t defend it enough. Kouhei no longer saw the rank. No longer saw the man. All he saw was rage. Despite his control, his power began to flare. Had he not been trying to hold it back, it would likely choke any within range of life that were not his level or better. Imagine holding a dam’s worth of water with your bare hands. Leaks sprung and he was barely able to control himself as his words came out as a barely audible hiss. “You . . . dare . . . “
“Never. Never once have I ever offered an excuse as to why I failed. Never once have I backed away from laurel or punishment for my actions. You accuse me of being a poor leader? Look in a mirror. You literally led the Seireitei in this damned massacre! Every death, every failed attempt at saving every inch of this place from the ruins it has become lies on your head. The labs, my people, and home were gone before we even returned. I never had a chance to save them. Do you know what else was lost? A catalog of what was in those labs. I had no idea what was in them, which is why I stressed caution and kept the exposure to a minimum. The labs were isolated, individualized and specialized for each occupant. Hollow research was a valuable and necessary study. I am not surprised at the existence of that venom, but it was not something I knew existed, much less survived. Do you really think I would send an untrained soldier into a war zone? You really think so little of me that you could even begin to imagine I’d purposefully endanger her to the point of her demise?! You damned fool. What purpose could I possibly have in losing one of the few people that actually gave a s**t about me???”
His fists clenched, his body was beginning to ache from the strain of holding back. Still, all that moved was his mouth. All that leaked were traces of his power. All that raged was the mind of a man pushed to the brink of his own doom. He barely held onto the fact that attacking Jean-Luc was suicide. Political and possibly physical. Still, the hiss continued. “As for Kaijuu . . . I opposed Kai Kentaro’s ridiculous plan from the very beginning. Drew my blade in such vehement opposition. Kaijuu was more than just an arrancar. He was my friend, you cretin! I have no idea where he went, how to find him, or if he even lives. No, my place has been holding together the hospital and beginning the reconstruction. Managing petty squabbles of those that don’t seem to understand the idea of respecting authority. Dealing with upstarts that think so highly of themselves as to dictate terms to a captain despite being fresh from the academy. My dear friend, the only survivor of squad 12 that fought to defend the grounds, is gone. You don’t think it tears at my soul to not be able to find him? As for his nature-“ loathing and hatred becoming as intertwined in his voice as much as air “-our ranks are littered beyond understanding by those that put on masks. I still stand by the elevation of a dependable, friendly, loving, and capable soldier that chose to take his off.”
“I will be damned or elevated by my choices, and those choices are made with the best of information at the time. I would sooner save Kaijuu a thousand times and be exiled at his side, then spend a minute covering my a** by betraying a friend. Even now, you don’t see the dangers. Kai Kentaro initiated that purge. Kai Kentaro lured my lieutenant from an exercise into rape and murder. My orders were safe, and would have led to her salvation. Instead, I had to lock her in a womb and hope she might survive. Even now, she is unwilling to explain why she disobeyed orders. That means one of two things- either she was ordered by Kentaro, or he blackmailed her. Perhaps he had some dirt, some leverage upon her that she is unwilling to divulge, even now. If not, then only a superior order should have taken her away from my mission. He has that authority." That more ominous option weighed heavily upon the rage-ridden man. the thought that such authority was being abused only compounded his anger. "To hell with the central ‘12’ or however many of them are left! I was a creator, made into a healer. Do you know what that perspective offers me? Don’t throw away that which has value, and save lives no matter the cost!!!” His chest heaved, breath heavy as if he had just heaved a mountain across the soul society. His rage was almost visible. Not in a flush of color, but in the pale and cold sweat upon his brow. The gaze of his eyes that could pierce more than the realm of the dead bored into the eyes of Jean-Luc. His body had not moved, but he was tensing every voulentary muscle he had. That tension meant that no snap movements would go unopposed. He was playing a very dangerous game. Openly insulting his commander was never going to be looked back upon as a wise move. Still, he held his tongue until he was put to the fire for losing all he held dear. Twice. The loss of his love and home in the 12th following orders for the incursion war, and again in the forced vizardization of Miya and loss of Kaijuu. Before she went into the womb, Miya had warned that his hatred and pain were the kind that consumed a man from within. Had he been a calm observer of this interchange, he might have agreed. Instead, he was standing in the bowels of his own personal hell . . . and never felt more alone.
