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 Posted: Sat Jul 04, 2015 8:34 pm
Items were moved, other rearranged, but most of Melvin's things were untouched. His new room was larger, even for two people, and it came with just the basic furnishings. This left much room for anyone with any say, specifically Jan, to decide what to do with it. Melvin honestly had been hesitant to pick any furniture or decoration until he could talk it over with Rin to make sure she was okay and they could move forward together.
As it stood, it was now him, Rin, and Jan and that mean they all needed to talk about how the room should be arranged. This of course now only could be done when America wasn't around as he felt it might give away too much. He wasn't sure he should even confirm that he was intimate with Jan, wondering if that gave too much for her to harm.
For a rare moment, America was gone, and Melvin changed the sheets and covers for that day's wash before heading to the bathroom to see if the plaster he put down had set. It had taken some time, but his room was finally fixed - if not needing paint and replacement tiles.
"I think I can start picking out some bathroom tiles. Get rid of the old ones since half of them are missing on that wall." He said to Jan, hoping for some input as he walked over and sat on the bed, leaning back.
His eyes wandered around the America-less room and back to Jan. "So........is Rin okay with all of this? Are you?"
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Posted: Sun Jul 05, 2015 7:49 am
Lawrence tended to insinuate himself into any living space as if he had always lived there, asserting himself over organisation and tidiness in subtle ways. Melvin made it especially easy, the room naturally tidy to begin with.
"New tiles sound like a good idea." he said. "The missing ones are unhygenic." They would foster mold and possibly worse besides, neither of which were appealing thoughts in a space which was intended for cleaning and grooming. "Also I am thinking about bringing my Doré engraving up here to hang on the far wall, if you do not mind."
"As for opinions, well, Rin is happy about it." he said with a smile. "She is glad I'm here as she puts it "to help look after you", she says you need someone to help take care of you sometimes and is glad it's someone she trusts. She doesn't mind America being here, she says she thinks America needs the same thing and it won't be for ever. She's always telling me how generous she thinks you are and what a good person you are. I'm in absolute agreement with her. You are more than you give yourself credit for."
He shrugged. "Me? I am of the same opinion, I am delighted to have access to a shower again and very grateful that I get to be close to you, you understand how to maintain a living space and you are excellent company."
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Posted: Sun Jul 05, 2015 8:28 pm
He smiled at the compliment, btu then felt instantly guilty for it. "Rin talks me up too much. This is her room. It always was going to be. We talked about it, and even if you were not with her, I would have always taken a friend in if they needed the help and offered an actual shower for someone who appreciates it. This just - works out the best."
But that didn't excuse America. She was an add-on, one that he had agreed to because he favored the idea of Jan in his room in sight than Jan and America together with no one else around to act as either a witness or an observor. He was curious as to their relationship, the way they [i[understood each other. There was too much new evidence and information that was coming up from the past tied into both of them, and it left Melvin uncertain to Jan's stability. He had to see if the man, who always appeared level-headed, had a tendency to violence.
So far, the information wasn't pleasing.
If America was a trigger, then he had to see and what Jan was in the fact of that trigger. If she wasn't, then she could at least provide some insight to his character and the relationship that seemed to tie all the violent incidents together.
Still, it made - life here a lot harder.
"You can put whatever decorations you want or have. I really have no plans."
"I didn't know America also needed your supervision. I'm just wondering how Rin showing up with work with her around and......" He sat up again, looking at Jan. "...what about the two of us? I don't suppose we could openly interact with each other on....a more intimate level and tip her off. Would she try to use that against us or become violent? She....well she isn't exactly normal. What with...with what happened to you." He only glanced at Jan's crotch for a second before looking up.
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Posted: Tue Jul 07, 2015 8:34 am
"She is just very fond of you, as am I, we agree on a great deal of things. She does want you to take more ownership of your life though, she's here but she can't be here properly. She feels bad about you calling it her room and not yours, since you live here and she can't directly help take care of it. I told her I'd help make it a room for both of you and relay her thoughts."
He looked pleased though at the prospect of getting to decorate. "I would like to help the room look satisfying and homey also." he said.
At the prospect of America he shrugged. "She would not mind, she knows who and what I am and there is no way that she could use it against us, romances happen you know, and as long as we did not give away Rin's part in all this and her endeavours to return then we would be fine. And she is more normal than most people on this island despite her physical make up. The only threat she poses is sexual."
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Posted: Tue Jul 07, 2015 4:14 pm
"Sexual? After what happened before? Would you allow yourself to be subjected to another Infirmary stay - or would you continue for some other benefit? I have to admit, I'm...curious as to what she even is. She seems very real. At least,, as real as the few times I was around America to offer her my help with the town reconstruction. I never knew her on any personal level, but she seems to know everything of you."
He leaned back down, feeling heavy with questions and not sure what was even fact.
"I guess if you wanted to be with her, ....that's fine. You are your own person. I take enough of you I suppose.......I guess it's selfish of me to want more. For you to allow us this much is a lot. .....I simple don't know exactly what she is to you fully or was..."
But he wasn't keen on sharing, and knew if America was being picked, he would stop dating Jan as best he could. It was weird having her in the room as it was, what with the question as to WHAT she was still in the air.
"She told me to research a bit. She seems very interested in you, even pushing Horace away. She considered him a bit of a joke I guess in comparison to her. Said you were her toy. I find that very disturbing considering that seems like she might hurt you."
Continuing to look up at the ceiling, he sighed. "I saw some pictures in the Infirmary records."
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Posted: Tue Jul 07, 2015 6:13 pm
"I doubt that there will be any further sexual encounters between she and I." Lawr said with a roll of his shoulders. "Unless she is interested, which I very much doubt she is. As for what she is, that does not matter to me, I don't concern myself with those questions, what is anyone really?"
Melvin did get a fond smile. "You are welcome to take whatever you like of me, you have never asked too much." And Lawrence felt that if Melvin ever did ask too much all it would take was a direct word and he would back off. "I enjoy your company immensely."
As the conversation turned to America however, his expression dropped back to its calm default. "She and I were enemies who sometimes slept with one another. She stopped sleeping with me when I injured her in a spar, since then she decided I was her stalker. I was paid back for the injury I gave her with the scar on my neck which you have probably noticed at times. There have been many many times we could have killed one another, we did not. I am not in danger."
He paused for a moment and then added. "What sort of infirmary records?"
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Posted: Tue Jul 07, 2015 6:50 pm
Unless she is interested?
Melvin looked over at Jan,frowning. "If she is then........you really should be careful with....well..........it can't really be comfortable what with..." He looked back up. What would Jan get out of fornicating something that left his most sensitive parts frost bitten? Melvin had to wonder how functional all of it would be if constantly abused.
Seeing as Jan continued to praise his good company, he felt this was the time people were prompted to compliment back. "Um.....I enjoy your company too. ...a lot. It's.......nice to not be in a empty room." It was nice to just have someone to hear you when you talked to yourself. It was less depressing when there was someone else in the room even if they didn't respond. Luckily, Jan was a bonus in that he did respond.
'Hmm? Oh, well..........it seems......well it is. I suppose. I guess. Did you..." He looked to the side and then back at Jan, searching his face. "...carve into her at some point......or some reason?" Since...there had to be a reason for such behavior.
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Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2015 2:30 pm
"It likely won't become an issue." Lawr said with that same patient smile, he did not particularly want to end up in the infirmary again, nor on H's radar. "But like anything else on this island, one cannot set anything entirely outside the realm of possibility."
It was a given to the pale man that Melvin would enjoy his company and he accepted the compliments as simple fact. "I enjoy empty rooms." he said. "But you are enjoyable yourself~"
At the question of America he nodded. "I did." he said. "A treble clef. She is a symphony which is not yet fully written. It was part of our relationship, at that time there was quite a bit of violence bound up in it." he shrugged. "Of course things are different now, she had a relationship with a capital R. I would not worry yourself about the past."
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Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2015 7:43 pm
He listened and thought and then tried to make sense, but struggled with some key elements. His investigation still wasn't complete to the extent where he didn't feel restless inside.
"So...do you...enjoy doing that? That kind of relationship? You did the same to Horace - but he said it was because he wanted to be treated like her. Did you do anything else violent with him? Do you...find it enjoyable?"
He didn't know what would cause anyone to start carving into flesh of a living person, but then again, he couldn't see anyone allowing it.
Remaining now prompt on one elbow, he shifted as he tried to get more comfortable while investing more of his attention in the conversation. "It's just...I don't get why you would do that. I mean, is it something that excites you or....is it like carving your initials into a tree?" He looked at Jan for some answers.
"And America....she doesn't seem all that interested in what relationship she has. She sounds like she just wants to ******** around with you. I don't get how she can have an understanding and yet warn everyone to keep away from you. Does she covet you - just to have you to herself? I just don't want her to maybe cause problems with me as she did Horace."
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Posted: Mon Jul 13, 2015 12:03 pm
"I do not really enjoy things in the same way as other people. I certainly do not enjoy brutality, I am not a sadist. I am simply curious and I respond in ways I consider logical. It was what Horace wanted so it was what he got and with America it was what she wanted so I obliged."
He raised a brow. "It is like writing music." he said. "One always begins a masterful symphony by writing a note, it is a simple reaction. It does not excite me, I do not get very excited about things in general I'm afraid."
"I cannot speak for America's drive, those are questions that you would need to ask her yourself. She comes back, she leaves, she comes back, I do not understand why, all I can hope to is to comprehend eventually."
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Posted: Mon Jul 13, 2015 6:57 pm
He wasn't sure what Jan meant in times like this. It sounded as if he was looking or hoping for something, watching and thinking. Yet he didn't write him off as just that, and wondered if the man was just unsure and confused about himself.
"Hey." He stayed there on his side, and then prompted his head on his hand as he looked at Jan. "Why do you say you can't feel love? What are you hopng to find or figure out with America? I just....do you just think of yourself some way? You seem expressive to me but you don't talk like you think like that. It sounds like you're doing an experiment."
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Posted: Mon Jul 13, 2015 7:10 pm
Melvin got that same calm look he always got, rewarded for his frankness and level headedness with some semblance of honesty, it was impossible to explain everything in a way the other man could understand, but he did not have to lie to the degree he did with most individuals.
"Because as far as I am aware Melvin, I am not sure that I can. I informed Horace of this and said to him that I would try to, but many of the things he asked of me did not seem to feel like love, or at the very least did not feel correct to me. Perhaps I am trying to unravel it, to understand, but it is not an answer I will find with America. What we have is not love, it is more akin to hate than anything else, but a familiar, easy kind of hate, have no inclination to injure one another but it is not love."
He glanced away. "Perhaps you are my investigation into that particular emotion, perhaps Rin is helping me. You are helping me too Melvin, as much as I am helping you, maybe more."
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Posted: Mon Jul 13, 2015 7:47 pm
he wasn't sure if he felt calmed by Jan's willingness to explain how he felt and the sort of strange familiarity the words came that echoed similar thoughts of the past, or that Jan was showing how he was unsure about his own feelings. While most would work very hard to fix Jan to help him find the shared happiness everyone else professed to know or desire, Melvin wasn't sure if he was even capable of offering that help, or pretending to be any sort of expert.
"I don't know how good I can be in showing anyone else love. I rejected Rin the first time she confessed to be because I didn't think I was the one to give her that. She was the one who showed me how to even have a relationship that didn't last a night, and even then I kept feeling as if I was adjusting or lucky for the time I had. Aside from Mia, she was the longest relationship I have had. I can't say that is a sign I'm any sort of teacher on the subject. I also....never said I loved Rin as much as I should have. It felt....rather strange to adjus to the idea. I kept worrying I was failing to live to that expectation. That emotion. Not when it came so eaisly to everyone else when they could express every facet of it so easily. Just..physically the most." He leaned back, raising his hands, gloved, and flexing the fingers.
"She was the one who showed tolerance and didn't push hard. She just...I don't know. Wished I guessed. Wished but never demanded. Just said how she felt and hoped that maybe I could get near it. ....trying was hard. Even the small things. No gloves. Taking longer times between showers. .......no protection." He didn't look at Jan now, but he was sure Rin must have told him.
He set his hands on his chest and then looked at last once more at Jan. "I can help with what I can but....I'm not the best at it. Rin was the expert. I was the blind one following her guidance. I'm only able to be the same as anyone else in a small window of time in the right conditions. Not exactly the best example of a love doctor."
Slowly, he reached one of those gloved hands to touch Jan's side. America was gone - for now.
"No rush. If Rin taught me anything, it was not to rush." And yet, he wished he rushed more these days. All those days wasted going slow felt somehow thrown away.
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Posted: Mon Jul 13, 2015 8:25 pm
"You do not need to be good at any of it. Don't worry I am not asking you to teach me, there will be no test at the end, I just ask you to let me observe you, Rin is helping me too though she says as always you are too hard on yourself. The love you felt was deep and strong, it was strong enough to lead you to me, to bring both of us together in seeking to bring Rin back." There was no mockery or judgement in his tone, just calm reason. "Though I understand how you feel, Horace could not accept that I did not seem to love him as much as he thought I should, though I tried."
He nodded. "Yes, she had the right idea, meeting you half way, a compromise when compromises are the stuff that true relationships are made of."
"I ask only for what help you can give and nothing more than that, I know who you are Melvin, Rin has told me so much, and what you are is more than enough for me." He placed his own delicate hand on Melvin's.
"Yes. Patience is how we will win this victory, that much I feel in my very bones, the spirits whisper that something is coming and it will be the thing that will set Rin free." His smile turned a little wistful. "All I would ask is that when she comes back, you do not cast me aside, at least not immediately, I think that capable of love or not, at this point I would need some time to adapt to being alone again. But I only want you to be happy Melvin, to give you what you want most and hopefully to learn in doing so."
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Posted: Tue Jul 14, 2015 4:39 pm
His eyes glanced down when his hand was held and he shifted to then hold it a bit more tightly, before looking up. The omen of something coming jerked at his heart, pulling it with a mixture of worry and distant excitement. There was that yearning hope, the never-ending desire, that Rin would return, and the thought of something, anything bring her closer to that reality made him feel frantic and nervous. It would mean he would need to be called upon to save her, and considering how she left, he still doubted if his all would even be enough to help her. He worried about failing her again and again, but he also hoped, desperately hoped, for her return. Even the thought of it made his chest tight and his heart ache, recalling her simple presence in a room.
"How….how soon?" He asked, wondering if he should be on alert this month. Would he even be able to sleep now ? It had only just now started to improve with Jan around.
Another firm squeeze came and Melvin's other hand to hold his. "I…I don't think Rin and I could just leave. She clearly wanted you here. I know she would want to show you her thanks. You've done a lot and….I really want to still have you around. I mean, until you want to go. It's just…….Rin and I……we seem to be in agreement over this. It's starting to not be….all that weird." It made things easier in fact, to not distance his feelings when Jan was around and holding them until Rin stepped out to the forefront. Now he could settle into a gentle dance, back and forth, where his feelings and touches could be shared between them even if one or the other wasn't fully present or in control.
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