You Might Be Mormon If
. . .the perv guys in your church try to get a glimpse of a girl's knees every now and then.
. . .you have a salad bowl at a friends house right now.
. . .you don't remember your mother's birthday, but you do remember the recipe for this great Jello salad.
. . .you pray that your food might "nourish and strengthen your body" before eating doughnuts.
. . .you have one kid in diapers and one on a mission
. . .when your entire family takes a vaction you double the ward you are visitings attendence
. . .if almost your entire school is Mormon but almost none of you are in the same ward.
. . .you can use anything (scriptures, notebook, crayons) to save the entire pew.
. . .every one of your plates has your name written on masking tape on the back.
. . . You carry Coke in a brown paper bag.
. . . There's a similarity between your church basketball games and the L.A. riots.
. . . Your parents get worried if you go out with someone on 2 dates in a row
. . . Your parents get worried if you go out with a group of less than 8 people
. . . You boycott "Romeo and Juliet" in your English class because Juliet is 14 and not even old enough to date yet.
. . . Instead of baseball cards, you collect Pass-along cards
. . . You've been known to travel across state lines (namely to Utah) to buy a prom dress.
. . . The first thing you look for when you see a hot guy or girl is a CTR ring.
. . . Instead of answering "Robert E. Lee" on your history test, you answered "Harold B. Lee"
. . . Youth Conference is the highlight of your summer.
. . . You think the best place to meet guys/girls is inside a church building.
. . . You wave hi to those guys in white shirts and name tags biking down your street.
. . . You sing hymn lyrics to your marching band music.
. . . Your friends need a Mormon/English dictionary to understand your discussions.
. . . You always wear a white t-shirt under your basketball jersey for the sake of modesty.
. . . You wig people out when you speak of your exploits at scout camp.
. . . You have a tan line from your CTR ring.
. . . You've ever used the words; shucks, dernit, or oh-my-heck.
. . . You are the last to know about the newest Pepsi flavor.
. . . You leave Prom early to go to the Stake Dance
. . . "Spiking the punch" means 'adding Mountain Dew'.
. . . You consider a pick-up line to be telling a girl that she is a "10 cow woman".
. . . "Party on" means Sprite and God's Army.
. . . You see your bishop after a co-ed game of Twister.
. . . You're one of the only guys in your choir.
. . . Your family and friends helped put on a production of 7 Brides for 7 Brothers.
. . . You play "Guess Who's LDS" in crowded places like Disney Land
. . . When you hear the word "elder" you think of 2 young men in suits and ties.
. . . You think "Got action" on a date means getting a good night kiss.
. . . Your alarm clock goes off at 5:30am
. . . You know four verses The Star Spangled Banner.
. . . You're mother was pregnant at your wedding.
. . . The local fertility clinic wants to use your wife for research.
. . . Your tithing donation amounts to more than your car payment.
. . . You share your life experiences with everyone on the first Sunday of the month.
. . . A fireside has nothing to do with wood and smoke.
. . . While giving a presentation in a public place such as a board meeting, you have ever inadvertently ended with, "in the name of..."
. . . You were shocked to find out that the 24th of July was not a National holiday.
. . .You answer Willford Woodruff instrad of Woodrow Willson
. . .You might be a mormon if you replace some short typed words like WTFudge! OMGosh!
. . .You can relate to the Mobsters and Mormon's movie easily, and even name people in your ward who act those ways.
. . .you have a salad bowl at a friends house right now.
. . .you don't remember your mother's birthday, but you do remember the recipe for this great Jello salad.
. . .you pray that your food might "nourish and strengthen your body" before eating doughnuts.
. . .you have one kid in diapers and one on a mission
. . .when your entire family takes a vaction you double the ward you are visitings attendence
. . .if almost your entire school is Mormon but almost none of you are in the same ward.
. . .you can use anything (scriptures, notebook, crayons) to save the entire pew.
. . .every one of your plates has your name written on masking tape on the back.
. . . You carry Coke in a brown paper bag.
. . . There's a similarity between your church basketball games and the L.A. riots.
. . . Your parents get worried if you go out with someone on 2 dates in a row
. . . Your parents get worried if you go out with a group of less than 8 people
. . . You boycott "Romeo and Juliet" in your English class because Juliet is 14 and not even old enough to date yet.
. . . Instead of baseball cards, you collect Pass-along cards
. . . You've been known to travel across state lines (namely to Utah) to buy a prom dress.
. . . The first thing you look for when you see a hot guy or girl is a CTR ring.
. . . Instead of answering "Robert E. Lee" on your history test, you answered "Harold B. Lee"
. . . Youth Conference is the highlight of your summer.
. . . You think the best place to meet guys/girls is inside a church building.
. . . You wave hi to those guys in white shirts and name tags biking down your street.
. . . You sing hymn lyrics to your marching band music.
. . . Your friends need a Mormon/English dictionary to understand your discussions.
. . . You always wear a white t-shirt under your basketball jersey for the sake of modesty.
. . . You wig people out when you speak of your exploits at scout camp.
. . . You have a tan line from your CTR ring.
. . . You've ever used the words; shucks, dernit, or oh-my-heck.
. . . You are the last to know about the newest Pepsi flavor.
. . . You leave Prom early to go to the Stake Dance
. . . "Spiking the punch" means 'adding Mountain Dew'.
. . . You consider a pick-up line to be telling a girl that she is a "10 cow woman".
. . . "Party on" means Sprite and God's Army.
. . . You see your bishop after a co-ed game of Twister.
. . . You're one of the only guys in your choir.
. . . Your family and friends helped put on a production of 7 Brides for 7 Brothers.
. . . You play "Guess Who's LDS" in crowded places like Disney Land
. . . When you hear the word "elder" you think of 2 young men in suits and ties.
. . . You think "Got action" on a date means getting a good night kiss.
. . . Your alarm clock goes off at 5:30am
. . . You know four verses The Star Spangled Banner.
. . . You're mother was pregnant at your wedding.
. . . The local fertility clinic wants to use your wife for research.
. . . Your tithing donation amounts to more than your car payment.
. . . You share your life experiences with everyone on the first Sunday of the month.
. . . A fireside has nothing to do with wood and smoke.
. . . While giving a presentation in a public place such as a board meeting, you have ever inadvertently ended with, "in the name of..."
. . . You were shocked to find out that the 24th of July was not a National holiday.
. . .You answer Willford Woodruff instrad of Woodrow Willson
. . .You might be a mormon if you replace some short typed words like WTFudge! OMGosh!
. . .You can relate to the Mobsters and Mormon's movie easily, and even name people in your ward who act those ways.
