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WARNING! The following RP will likely contain large amounts of humor and/or human stupidity. Read at own risk. xd

Jikh, resident of planet Evol and member of the Evoluvian race, stared in dismay at the message on his screen. Apparently his assimipendix had absolutely no chance of ever working, and so his superiors had finally labeled him a Defective; fortunately, they had apparently recognized the advances in technology he'd brought them, and so instead of killing him brutally and publicly as was customary, they were exiling him from the Empire. Some small corner of his mind probably noted that he should be grateful for small mercies, but all he could think of was how he was being exiled from his home. After several moments, he managed to recover from his shock enough to type in coordinates for the nearest non-Evoluvian system with shaky hands; scanning the planets, he discarded one option after another before he finally found a suitable planet to settle in - a quaint little place that had natives he could blend in with. Really, though, what kind of name was "Earth"?

Jik is an exiled member of the Evoluvians - a powerful species capable of changing their very DNA via assimilating foreign organic matter. The problem is, Jik's assimipendix - the organ responsible for such - doesn't work, meaning that he's been labeled Defective and given the aj-d'gyk, as the saying goes. Still, he's resolved to make himself a new home on Earth, and after a bit of mental calculation, age comparison, and examination of international IQ rates, has taken the role of a high school student in a small town. Of course, there's the small matter of the fact that it's the second most invaded planet in the galaxy, not to mention the fact that most species don't like his kind, but he is "THE ALMIGHTY JIK, GREATEST TECHNOLOGICAL MASTERMIND OF THE EVOLUVIAN EMPIRE!"; he can handle himself.

_____ is her school's Ice Queen, though considering her past relationships with men, that's understandable: her male teachers leer at her, her male neighbors have tried to seduce her, and every last boy she's ever gone out with has turned out to be an idiot, sexist, a pervert, or some unholy combination of the three - honestly, it's almost enough to turn a girl off men forever. Actually, come to think of it, the only two males she knows who aren't stupid, bigoted, or pervs are her father and brother, but her single dad's rather scatterbrained and her brother has this weird alien obsession. However, things get interesting when she wakes up to find that they suddenly have a new neighbor... who lives in a house that most definitely WASN'T there yesterday... and doesn't seem to have a lick of knowledge about human social interactions. Not only that, but his backstory is full of more holes than swiss cheese, he blushes purple, his hair is green, and he calls those around him "puny humans" on a regular basis, and yet not a single human being in the town questions his sudden appearance or many quirks... except for her brother, since the guy sets off her brother's "alien detectors".
Needless to say, she quickly decides to get to the bottom of the strange, arrogant, loud, infuriating, and socially clueless boy known as Jik Magnus. And no, she does not find him attractive, she does not find his antics endearing, and if anyone so much as SUGGESTS that she MIGHT think he has a nice smile she will EVISCERATE THEIR SOUL!!!
...Oh, and there's the various other weirdos and abominations that keep popping up.

Name: Jik
Age: (Human equivalent of) 16
Personality: An egotistical, narcissistic jerk who acts like he's the greatest thing since sliced bread. That being said, he's actually quite nice, has a surprising moral streak, and shows none of the bigotry you'd expect from him... though when confronted with this, he covers his nicer side with claims that would fit the egotistical douchebaggery most see on the surface: "I didn't save you from that (insert species here) for your sake, I just despise idiotic weaklings!", "Of course I don't think females are weaker than males, you're all equally inferior to the ALMIGHTY JIK!", and of course, what seems to be his personal favorite, "No, of course I don't care, (insert justification here)!" Of course, these claims are usually backed by blushing, flustering, and/or stuttering, so only complete and utter idiots and/or the people who don't notice his good traits in the first place buy it.
Bio (optional): See RP summary
Appearance (Human Disguise): Jik
True Form: As human disguise, but with pointed ears, sharper teeth, gray skin, ten fingers (on each hand), claws, multi-jointed legs, and tripod-esque feet.

No, Jik's a lot more sane than he sounds... just eccentric with a big eggo and no understanding of human culture. I have a big eggo too, it's one of my infinite number of charm points. mrgreen

Ooh, me like! Do you want to start or shall I, and at what point in the storyline would you like to start: first meeting, school, or first alien attack?

"Position secured... camouflage is active... Suggestion Emitter sent to human frequencies... all right, that should be everything," Jik murmured to himself, satisfied that his ship was properly set to blend in with the rest of the houses here and that the special mind-affecting waves it was emitting would keep the humans from thinking too hard about his sudden appearance in their society or the various mistakes he was bound to make at first. On an unrelated note, this "English" felt a bit strange to speak, but that would likely pass with time - it was his new planet's language, after all, so he might as well get used to speaking it. He frowned slightly a moment, trying to figure out what he was forgetting... Oh, right. "Azkir, where is Jik's polymorphic suit?" The ship's interface answered by opening a hidden alcove with a strange one-piece suit inside it. "Thank you." he put on the suit, which then morphed him to look more like the locals, as well as changing itself into a T-shirt, jeans, socks, and sneakers. With that, he exited the ship (revealing that on the outside it looked like a normal human house) and wandering off, the alien intending to survey the area before forming further plans to blend in.

(Up to you whether she bumps into him or ends up being saved from a perv by him or something... this is the best I could think of, admittedly. sweatdrop )

The alien in disguise blinked and quirked an eyebrow in surprise when the (admittedly rather attractive) human female bumped into him. However, he recovered fairly quickly, suppressing his self-defense instinct and using his (in his own opinion) not-inconsiderable intellect to swiftly calculate his next actions. He gave her a small, polite smile that unwittingly gave away some of his arrogant side, the alien, drawing on his knowledge of human customs. "Hello," he greeted her pleasantly. "I am Jik; is there a reason you bumped into me?"

Jik's smile dropped as she left, the alien in human disguise baring rather sharp teeth and looking rather annoyed at being so easily brushed off. Really, he'd been polite and everything!
Still, he managed to calm himself after a moment, teeth returning to normal as he resumed exploring the area; after all, if he was going to blend in, he needed to know where everything was. Admittedly, no matter how well he blended in there would likely be a human or two who managed to break through the mass hypnosis and realize there was something strange going on, but then that was why he'd picked a town whose inhabitants were generally average or lower intelligence. Of course, if he'd known that the girl he'd just bumped into was one of those few who would probably be smart enough to realize something was off (even if it wasn't necessarily right away), he probably wouldn't be so calm about it.

(Huh... I usually go with the inside of someone's head as being some sort of command center. That's probably influenced by the Teselecta, though. xd )

Meanwhile, the object of her thoughts paused, frowning slightly in puzzlement as he felt a tingling in his quaznor - the human equivalent of suddenly feeling like someone was out to get you. After a moment, he discarded the sensation as unimportant, instead finishing his school registration papers. Really, the security these humans had on their computers was pitiful. He did find some joy in picking his new last name, however; after all, what better last name for him than a word meaning "the Great"? Besides, Jik Magnus rolled off the tongue quite well. That said, he headed back home, intending to get some rest and finish what little research on humans he had yet to do.

(Eh, quite possibly. I named a megalomaniacal Pichu in another RP Stormageddon, after all. xd )

Jik blinked, frowning slightly when he noticed a flashing light that indicated the outer proximity (silent) alarm had been tripped. He remained calm, however, pressing a few buttons to review the... security footage, for lack of a better phrase. 'Strange... it appears to be the female from earlier.' Still, she didn't give his home more than a look, so he turned off the screen, instead heading to the kitchen to fix himself some food.