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Name: Raphael Roux

Nickname: -

Age: 26

Birthday: May 2

Sign: Taurus

Gemstone: Emerald

Blood Type: A

Fav. Food: Mac and cheese.

Hated Food: Flan.

Occupation: Pet Shop Owner

Hobbies:

Pete's Pets - It was his father's pet shop - his father's dream. It's really not exactly a passion of Raphael's, but his family put a lot into making it happen, and since it meant so much to everyone, Raphael is doing his best to keep it together even if his family's long since fallen apart. It means long hours and a lot of stress, but even if it's bleeding more money than it's making, Raphael doesn't have the heart to give up on it.

Volunteering - Raphael's family has fallen apart, and honestly, it's kind of his fault it happened; that's why he puts so much work into trying to help other people who've gone through hell in this messed up city, especially kids (he saw what this did to his baby brother). He spends a lot of his time in soup kitchens, orphanages, children's hospitals - it's not really enough difference, but it's something.

Virtues:

Dedicated - Raphael Roux does not half-a** anything, especially not when he's given his words. If he says he's going to get it done, come hell or high water, he's going to get that s**t done. This especially shows in his repeated efforts to breathe life back into his father's shop, desperate to maintain his legacy long after everyone else stopped caring.

Righteous - No matter what, Raphael always tries very hard to do The Right Thing. Even as a kid, his parents always used to joke about how he'd grow up to be a cop, and he's never grown out of it. It can be something as simple as giving his seat up to an old lady on the bus or as drastic as tackling a mugger, it doesn't matter the extent. Raphael has always had a very defined sense of what was Right, and he will do anything to uphold that, anything.

Flaws:

Rigid - Yes, Raphael is devoted and he always tries to do right by people - but what is right, and what's the line between dedication and obsession? Raphael does not do shades of gray, and god forbid anyone try to tell him to ease up a bit. It's not his fault you don't have the same set of ideals as he does, and yeah, he will judge the ******** out of you for it. Probably not subtly.

Bitter - The only reason Natalie Roux was at the New Year's Ball back in 2015 was because Raphael swore up and down that he'd take care of her. Spoiler alert, he failed. Gloriously. She went missing that night, and from there, his family fell to pieces. His father all but disowned him, went crazy looking for her, and turned up dead about a year later. His mom and his little brother got the ******** out of dodge and left. Raphael knows he ******** everything up, just like he knows whatever's wrong with this city ******** everything up - he does his best to do good, but that doesn't mean he expects any real good to come of it. He's beyond cynical to the point where it's been near-impossible to forge any meaningful relationship since.

Polished this up a bit, and Kuro is revamping the art like a champ. heart

Hey frayed! Congrats on the revamp art on the way!

I've got a couple little nitpicks (assuming you want me to go ahead and look at the powered side too) but overall, Mr. Roux looks really good!

Technically, blood types will have to be either negative or positive, so if you could slap a symbol behind the A, I'd greatly appreciate it (also, just for fun, here is a neat blood type personality read!).

His virtues and flaws look great and volunteering is a good hobby to have but Pete's Pets reads more as a duty than it does an actual hobby. What does Raphael enjoy doing? Without having his father's passion for the shop, it sounds more like it's an obligation than an actual interest. I really like what you've got written for it -- maybe you could put that segment up next to the Occupation line, for further description? Otherwise, if it's going to be a hobby, it needs a little more elaboration on how he finds it enjoyable as one might find reading, playing with animals, video games, etc enjoyable.

In the powered section, I just need you to clarify what planet he's a knight of and add a challenge (unless you're going to come up with one later, in which case you can just put TBD or leave it as the default!).

I like the transition of Usa-Jingu's weapon but I need a little more clarification on how his magic actually works as well as a tie-in with one of the themes of Mars (Power Theme: Judgement, war, spirit). How he channels the attack needs to be described too, or else it just sounds like he's a walking heat stroke inducer.

To give some examples, Havasu Falls's rope has to connect on both ends for his magic to be channeled, Celsus's whip has to be cracked for the distraction magic to occur, and Niflhel's chain has to actually wrap around the opponent for the magic to work.

To give some examples on other Mars' knights and how they've incorporated the themes into their attacks (like Tanais has ghostly flames mentioned in hers, re: fire/heat), I'd suggest you look at Kairatos, Glitnir, Tanais and Gehenna to see how they worked their magic around the themes. You could have the heat effect be an adverse side effect to another attack (maybe it gives the opponent a sudden burst of strength/aggression/spirit but at the cost of feeling overheated? Or the stronger they're "judged", the hotter they get?), it just has to tie-in to one of the Mars' themes, that's all!



I hope all of that makes sense; please feel free to DM or PM me if you have any questions or would like to chat about it! Otherwise, just quote me when you're ready for me to swing back around and review him again! Thank you!! <3