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 Posted: Tue Dec 30, 2014 6:42 am
Rep had very little to do, but he still nevertheless tried to keep himself busy, Death division it turned out was good for this, there was always something needing done, even if most of it was menial. No one would actually trust Rep with high classification stuff, his reputation preceded him. And it sucked, he thought because he actually had no ******** intention of telling anyone anything, he liked his job.
He had also made himself known as someone who for whatever ******** suicidal reason, had no problem with visiting the dragon's den that was Caelius' office. That day it was where he was headed, arms full of various reports and things that other people hadn't wanted to deliver individually.
He didn't knock with his arms full, simply pushed the door open with his foot to see who the hell was home, if anyone.
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Posted: Tue Dec 30, 2014 1:10 pm
Mark expectantly lifted his head as soon as Rep appeared. "Did my mail order come? I ordered it like, two weeks ago." How he had managed to get mail order to Deus was another story, unless Rep was also the division post office boy (they had a PO box in Colorado, because American shipping was always the cheapest, and everything always seemed to arrive in Colorado first).
The division assistant took out a five, expectant.
Other than Mark, the office showed very little signs of life. Oz was nowhere to be found, and the prodigal artifact-collecting regime-enforcing Death lead himself was nowhere to be found, most likely off enforcing some regime while lavishing in his wealth of artifacts while gazing into the sunset with his hair billowing in the wind, just in case he needed to take over the world thirty times and look beautiful while doing it.
There was a (handwritten) note on his desk, but nobody ever paid attention to those. Sometimes it was best to let sleeping notes lie.
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Posted: Tue Dec 30, 2014 1:23 pm
"I don't know, ******** did it?" Rep asked rhetorically but not particularly unkindly as he placed the stack of sent papers on the desk. "I can only imagine what kind of s**t you waste people's time ordering man." The redhead didn't seem to even question the presence of a mail service on the island, simply took it as a given that of course there was.
Shuffling the papers, he leaned over to get a look at the note (or try) as he did so. He figured it couldn't be anything too important, Cael wouldn't leave anything important around.
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Posted: Tue Dec 30, 2014 2:37 pm
"Priorities," Mark explained, as if that actually explained anything. He fished through Rep's stack of papers, as if there was somehow a giant box hidden somehow magically between them. When it looked like he wasn't going to get his limited collectible Marvel figurine of the day, he deflated a little bit and slumped back in the chair.
It turned out the note left on the desk wasn't actually intentional, as it had been folded several times. There was writing scrawled on both sides of it, and what looked like words at the top that said "eport", so probably someone's left over mission report. From the corner of the page that Rep was looking at, the only word that seemed to have any form of repetition was the word zombie and infected. And of course the usual dying, and complaining about how nobody respected them as an individual.
Mark seemed unconcerned, fiddling around with his laptop (number one), making disgruntled faces at his screen. His cell phone continued to buzz annoyingly, reminding him that he had 13, 152 unread messages.
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Posted: Tue Dec 30, 2014 3:00 pm
Rep tended to respect other people's business, but sometimes respecting other people's business clashed with his predisposition to severe kleptomania. A letter he'd already started reading might as well be finished, so he carefully reached over with a finger, nonchalantly pulling the letter over to him and unfolding it subtly. For the time being he let Mark do whatever he was doing.
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Posted: Tue Dec 30, 2014 3:07 pm
The mission report read as followed:
MISSION REPORT:
Dec 28th
Why did you put me there was it something I did to offend you? I wish you had respected me as an individual before you put me on some island with a bunch of zombies. Yeah, you heard me, zombies. Well, ******** you. You know what I'm going to survive and then I'm going to get rid of these zombies and then maybe you'll actually get rid of that stick up your a**. I hope you get what you deserve. Also I'm telling Allan on you. Once I get back I'm going to tell everyone about Project Zero.
- A. R
Notable mentions: Everyone is infected how do you think I feel?!?!?
The Death assistant's phone buzzed, making it the 13, 153th unread message. Mark continued to pay it no attention and was now lying on his desk staring horizontally at the screen, chin propped up by his second laptop. He suddenly looked up, as in, tilted his chin up slightly. "Burgundy or mauve?"
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Posted: Tue Dec 30, 2014 3:16 pm
Rep raised a brow. Project Zero. Zombies. December. That was ******** wonderful, there was another zombie outbreak somewhere out there, they hadn't ******** let the zombie thing lie. Something was going down and apparently it was a something the other leaders theoretically didn't know about. Or at least Allan, but he imagined there was a lot of s**t Allan didn't get told these days. He just hoped the island was ******** far far away from this island. It probably ******** wasn't.
"Burgundy, what are you ******** gay? Mauve is the color of old woman's lipstick dude. Always go with browns, never pinks." Unless you were Harrison, then maybe it would be doable. Maybe.
Discretion was something Rep had never heard of, once something had been read it couldn't be un-read. "Everything...ok.. around here?" he asked. "Where's Cael?"
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Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2014 8:23 pm
"Pink can be done," Mark began to argue, quietly exiting out of the purchase screen, "With my pure charm and awesomeness I could totally pull it off." It lacked the usual oophm to it, words said on default banter.
He gave a noncommittal shrug to Rep's next question, or series of them. "Define okay. Like, are you still alive, yes. Am I alive, yes. Is this island still here, yes. Am I buying a new laptop skin instead of pondering about the imminent zombie apocalypse of the world, yes."
Mark's right eye was twitching. Avoidance.
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Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2014 8:47 pm
Rep raised a patient brow at Mark. "You so couldn't though." he said. "I mean, maybe if you had more manliness, more bulk, more just... more. Then maybe. As it is, stick to not-pinks if you don't want to look like a f*****t."
At the response however he raised a brow. "So this thing is legit." he said slowly. "They ******** up more zombies?" He inhaled slowly and deeply through his nose, aware of how it felt to be very firmly backed into a wall of his own denial. Sometimes things just got too big, too ******** out of control.
"Is there anything we can do?" he said slowly. "And if not we, I can do? Because this seems kind of ******** serious, like the basement but bigger." he pointed at the letter. "I mean have you read this?, I shouldn't have but..."
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Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2014 8:58 pm
"Can? Maybe. Want? Maybe not." Mark eyed Rep shrewdly. "How much are you paying?"
It was even sadder that the Death Assistant was actually debating touring Rep around a potential zombie apocalypse ground zero either to cure boredom or to salvage buying both a burgundy and mahogany laptop cover. In his defense, the decal was fresh or sick or whatever kids called it these days.
A thought suddenly made him backtrack. "Aren't you already like, sick from that virus or whatever. You could get, I dunno, double virus. Or they could cancel each other out, or you could just explode."
His phone buzzed again but he paid it no attention. It was also flashing in various sorts of emergency states once again proving that text messages were not the best way to ask for any sort of rescue at any point in time.
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Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2014 9:25 pm
Rep was used to hearing about the value of money. It was more often than not that the argument about what action was worth the payment came up. Money was important to Harrison and it was for that reason that this time he had absolutely no intention of offering Mark a damn penny. He'd learned his lesson the last time, dealing with the other hunter's deep misery about the state of their finances had been hard to bear.
"Paying nothing. If it something you don't want to do, I guess, don't do it. I'm no some ******** bleeding heart who is gonna make you." Rep's morality was tenuous at best, sure the apocalypse might be breathing down their necks, but he wasn't about to get all ********> vegan about it. Not caring was manly so he maintained his levels of not giving a ******** as best he could.
At the mention of a virus however he raised a brow. "A virus? Am I?" he asked. "I mean I got that arm crystal s**t but like. There was that guy in my head like... someone fixed it? And like, the basement s**t like. I got better?" Rep's own levels of denial were high enough to have convinced him that he was actually fine, that somehow he'd gotten whatever it was right out of his system and was done with it.
"I mean, I feel ok." he said, shrugging his shoulders. Health and safety was not his strong point.
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Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2014 9:45 pm
The Death Assistant opened his mouth to say something, and then just smartly closed it. He opened it again after Rep mentioned the I got better part and with a lot of concentrated effort tore his eyes away from the other Hunter and just stared straight outside, right out the third story window, where a couple of Hunters were enjoying the trampoline placed right below them.
"For the record," Mark finally said, after a prolonged silence, "I told you-"
-SLAM
He jumped a good two feet as the door nearly unhinged itself, the familiar figure of Mark's boss striding into the room, still holding their very bloodstained weapon. The Death Assistant sat up straight and immediately opened his laptop, clicking a button to make it look like he was working on graphs or something.
It was hard to tell if Caelius was in a bad mood, a terrible mood, or just in a mood, as he made no motions to desummon his weapon, and instead, flicked it, causing the remaining black ichor (or blood, it was debatable) to splatter against the ground.
Someone else would be cleaning that up later.
The Death lead pulled open one of the desk drawers, searching through some folders with his open hand, Rep's delivery bundle still ignored. About a minute in, he found whatever it was he was looking for, began to walk out, and paused, as if missing something and making a point of it.
"I'm still working on the uh, the thing!" Mark squeaked, pointing at Rep. "He volunteers!"
That unreadable expression again from his truly, and then he was halfway out the door. "Five minutes. I'll see you at the lighthouse portal. Get someone to deal with your affliction problem before then or find a substitute."
He was gone before anyone could actually respond with any tangible reply, once again to absolutely nobody that mattered why on a good day, the Death Division sucked.
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Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2014 10:02 pm
Mark got a quizzical expression for his cryptic comment and Rep was about to ask if he really had contracted something ******** horrible from the combination of red eyes and whatever had taken up residence in his arm that one time when Cael stormed in and derailed his train of thought. He was waving Circe around in a concerning fashion but the redhead didn't flinch, instead just inched a little to one side away from the splatter as it hit the floor. It really did look like some sort of major s**t was going down - that or someone had tried and failed to give the Death lead some backtalk - it was probably zombies though.
When he was volunteered without any of his own input a little of the attentiveness went out of Rep's posture, wilting ever so slightly in resignation. Yes of course he ******** volunteered, he was going to be the next guy writing letters pleading for a little bit of help, letters that went completely ******** ignored, he knew it. And he'd ******** do it anyway, because he had a ******** job and that was better than not having a job.
When Cael was gone he sighed heavily and stood. "There's no easy way for me to sort whatever the ******** this "affliction problem" is, is there?" he asked Mark grimly, not really expecting much. There probably weren't any handy bandaids for this particular problem and dragging someone else in his stead was not something he was willing to entertain.
"Guess I'd better go to the lighthouse if that's the case." Mark got a nonplussed look. "Thanks bro." he said, without too much malice, mostly sheer exasperation.
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Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2014 10:12 pm
Mark hit enter on the keyboard of whatever he was working on. "On the bright hand side, you won't explode when you enter the portal!" He was probably only doing that so he himself didn't look bad after volunteering Rep; Caelius probably didn't take too kindly to volunteer Hunters suddenly exploding during portal entry.
The Death Assistant paused for a second, seemingly deep in thought. "Here." He pulled out from a first aid kit a bracelet glowing a soft runic red. "This will help. Like, protect you and stuff."
There was a fifty percent chance that this was actually a magical cure-all and a fifty percent chance that Mark was just improvising on the spot to make Rep actually make his designated location on time.
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Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2014 10:23 pm
Rep gave Mark a long look. Not exploding in the world outside the island wasn't a perk, just an expected thing that everyone assumed to be the case. On the island he was actually pretty relieved to hear that he might not die on arrival to wherever the ******** he was going. Even taking the bracelet and putting it on - he felt like he was developing a tan line from wearing cuffs all the time - he felt just a little better.
"Thanks." he repeated, this time a bit more genuine. It might have been bullshit, it might have been anything but Rep tried to look on the not dead yet side of things whenever he could. And he wasn't.
"Wish me luck." he said grimly. "And don't go for the mauve. You would look super gay."
And with that he made his way to the lighthouse portal and whatever potentially awful s**t was waiting for him down there.
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