Welcome to Gaia! ::

Before I go any further with reviewing, I'd like to let you know several things just to clarify that for the time being they are available to you in the event you did not know or otherwise

1. We still need both Captains and Katena, predominantly Katena as we only have four or five of them complete I do believe.

2. You are allowed up to five Shikai abilities, so you have three more to work with.

3. Just glancing at your abilities, I'm definitely going to be commenting on those the next time I post, and as a little warning, they both need cool downs, in posts.

4. Remove the bottom two Kido from both your Hado and Bakudo list and those should be good to go.

Quote me again when you're ready for me to continue.

You can still be a Lieutenant, or even the Captain if you wished, either of which also allows you a Bankai. However, I'll review your Shikai for the time being.


First and foremost, if she's going to manipulate shadows, a zanpakuto idea that pops up very often and I personally greet with great hesitance, I'm going to ask that it be a passive ability that takes up one of your Shikai abilities and has a very limited area (or object) of influence. An exception would be of course if your zanpakuto was like a throne of shadow itself that could be manipulated as seen fit by her (see Rosa Delfino for a more clear example. Yes I do realize its my own RPC, but her Bankai is an example of what I mean).

Ability one needs a range and a min/max width of the attack.

This is the ability that worries me the most. I have no problem with being able to manipulate her own shadow around a fifty yard radius, but any other shadows are a no go. This is because if you were to clash with another, it's child's play to make their own shadow take their feet off or so on. I'd add in a weakness too, if she makes it so she's able to move her own shadow around as well as for how long she can do it.

Alternatively, if you're familiar with the (Japanese) term jokiboi, you could always use that for an instant or short post use. If not, I can provide you a link if it sounds interesting. (Be warned there's a movie of the same name that is unrelated.)

Speed of light is the equivalent of slowing down time to a ridiculous speed, so anything faster just makes it that more ridiculous. As such, with atoms moving at that speed, simply moving through something would outright destroy it in the particular area you went through. I'm fine with a damaging sort of "blink", a teleport to a marked target, or heck, even a position swap (i.e. swap places with a previously marked target, that may or may not even be the opponent themselves), but this ability can't be allowed. And don't forget to add a cool down.

I'm actually okay with your fourth Shikai technique, it just needs some more information. Firstly, how long can she hold it before her own reiryoku absorbs it? Secondly, I don't mind the force being returned, or the "strength" but not an exact mimic. Returning the reiryoku as a harmful (strengthened) projectile however, is fine. May want to add some other restrictions as well, especially since the shadow manipulation part is pretty much under question with a few mild suggestions, as shadows are, as I'm sure I've made clear, a very very finely lined string of abilities.

This is fine, just add in a cool down in that she must wait out before being able to swap weapons again.

Yup. Three Bankai techniques for you. I'll grade it again when all three are down, so quote me again when you're ready.

Ability one needs to have the range severely down toned. 150 yards is one and a half foot ball fields, which is a pretty big distance. Additionally, there still needs to be a maximum width that each wall or slash can be.


Shikai three needs a range for her to be in to teleport. Although this sounds a little odd, think about someone setting up a marker an extremely long distance away and then basically teleporting out of a fight to the other side of a city, or even country, or worse from one dimension to another.


Bankai Ability One is extremely overpowered. This ability alone can cause a two hit kill and it doesn't even need to hit anywhere lethal. With the right strike, it causes a one hit kill, since removing someone's head or torso gets rid of the heart or brain and thus killing the body immediately. Long story short, this needs a total overhaul.


I'm fine with this except for one part. Down tone it severely from ninety-five and I think it will be okay.


Again, only one part makes this ability broken. Either in the same location, or within a very short range and it should be fine.


General issues. It seems she's still able to fully manipulate shadows, if I'm reading your Shikai description correctly. Please remove it from the description since you already have a technique that allows her a quick, one post use of her own shadow. Additionally, although it's in the ability that needs to be changed, also remove the ability to dimensionally splice body parts off of someone from your Bankai description.

Quote me again once you're done.

1] For Which ability? Plus you may have accidentally used yards again.
2] Paralysis is also a no, simply because paralysing one's head or torso is the equivalent of doing it to the rest of the body either by stopping the heart or brain function, and especially not with a kill coming up on the second strike.

1) Thirty feet should actually be plenty.
2) That one I couldn't answer for you. The main issue is that it's going to cause serious problems and it may be better to scrap it and come up with something else.

Bankai One, lower the lasting period

Bankai Two lower the combo amount some more. Fifty-five is still excessive.

Bankai Three, how long do they last if they don't manage to redirect attacks. Additionally, if they can't control where it gets redirected, is the attack simply thrown back in the exact opposite direction it came from? Don't forget to add a cool down to it as well.

Also, don't worry about it, it's my job.