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New enemies worry an ancient entity. How do the Shinigami face beings as old as faith? 

Tags: Bleach, Shinigami, Roleplay, Soul Reaper, Zanpakuto 

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Hakora Shinari「Second Division Captain」 Goto Page: 1 2 [>] [»|]

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XIII Distant Dream

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 05, 2013 12:22 am


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Alias/Title: Flash Master, Hakuna Master, 2nd Squad Captain, Head of the Shinari Family

Nickname: Fox Demon

Gender: Male

Date of Birth: 04/22

Actual Age: 2876

Appearance Age: 28


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    Height: 5’8”

    Weight: 145

    Eye Color:

    Hair Color: Blue

    Nationality: Soul

    Reiatsu Color: White


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    Occupation: Squad 2 Captain, Noble Head

    Affiliation: Soul King, Soul Society, Shinari Family

    Former Occupation: Squad 2: Lt, 3rd seat, unseated

    Former Affiliation: N/a


    Hobbies:
    Music
    Stringed Instruments
    Drawing
    Poetry
    Literature
    Training
    Likes:
    Nature
    Meditation
    Hot Springs
    Nocelle
    Music
    Assassinations
    Honour
    Respect

    Dislikes:
    Disrespect
    Dishonour
    Uptightness
    Failure


    Personality: Hakora has grown up being a noble man raised to lead the Otmitsukido. Most in his family is very serious, duty bound and goal oriented. It would be a lie to say Hakora wasn’t this, but compared to his family he is more relaxed. He is fun loving and will never miss a chance to relax and enjoy life, but when it comes to his job he executes it with precision and accuracy. He has had very little failed missions in his life time and he aims to keep it that way. He would much rather over plan a mission then under plan it and lose a person or fail the mission. He is very set in his ways and when it comes to fighting he is very focused. Around Nocelle he is very relaxed and tries to get her to loosen up even if she hates when he is around. He is a very understanding of people, but at the same time he is a fixer.

    Sexual Preference: Heterosexual


    Family: Shinari Family


    Background:
    Hakora was born into the Shinari family and from birth he was watched over and cared for as importance. He was trained from a young age how to fight, but was more keen to Hand-to-hand combat. As Hakora became a little older, but still a child, his father would take him to the human world and teach him firsthand how to slay hollows accurately and effectively. His father would take him on day trips to the human world and then end it by watching the sunset while telling him about family history or about being a Squad 2 Lt.
    Hakora’s family was one of the four noble house and it was known for it’s extensive Ninjitsu training. Most Squad 2 Captains preferred having Shinari members as they would have assurance that they were properly trained in assassinations and stealth. Hakora was not the reatest with the sword, but worked very hard to be effective with it. When it came to speed and hand-to-hand combat Hakora excelled.
    When he came of age, teenage soul years his father would give him low leveled recon missions that were official Squad 2 missions, but he had permission to give to his son as training since Hakora was a promising future addition. Hakora during his time as a teen never failed a mission and was given early admissions to the Academy. He was only in the Academy 3 months when the Squad 2 Captain saw it was pointless for him to continue and recruited him into his Squad as an unseated member.
    Hakora became one of the go to people for recon missions and could easily do low to mid level missions solo. He was quickly promoted to 3rd seat under his father. A war broke out that was a rebel group against the Soul Society and Hakora volunteered to eradicate the group and stop the threat. He would locate enemy bases and infatuate them using his bare hands and small ninjitsu weapons.
    No matter how many bases Hakora evaded it seemed the rebel forces were not weakening. One evening the rebels broke into the Getei 13 and led an attack. During this attack, Hakora’s father was overpowered and kidnapped. They beat back the forces, but Hakora’s father was nowhere to be found. Hakora worked over time and found every base he could try to find his father. His father was the most important thing to him next to the Soul Society.
    With the help of the Captain, Hakora found the main rebel compound where the rebel leader was reported to be and also his father. The Captain did not want to send Hakora on this mission even with his impressive record. The Captain put together a 5 man team with Hakora as the head. The team infiltrated the base and eliminated the forces as they perceed in. The base was heavily guard and it was easily a rank A mission. All the members, except Hakora were killed in combat. Once he infiltrated into the base and located the core he found the Rebel leader and was in complete horror to find his father and the leader were one in the same. His father revealed his plan to free the family from the Soul Society and to end the Soul Reapers grip on the Soul Society. Hakora, who loved his father was conflicted for his love for his father and his loyalty to his father..Hakora did what was right and drew a Kunai and slayed his father and desposed of the body.
    When Hakora returned to his captain he reported his father was killed at the hands of the rebel and that the leader was slayed. A funeral was held in his father’s honour and Hakora hid his father’s involvement from everyone including his family to save face. Hakora replaced his father as Lieutenant. He served his position faithfully. He met a woman in Squad 11 named Nocelle and another member named Hawk. He would try and spend time with them and even began developing a crush on Nocelle, but she was clearly with Hawk.
    When the rescue team was sent and lost to the hollows he began to lose hope for them. When they returned, to his horror they were all Vizards. One was Squad 2’s 3rd seat. Hakora fought the 3rd seat member and was evenly matched and then overpowered. By luck, Hakora got a draw on a kunai and sent it through the 3rd seat’s head before the 3rd seat could deliver a killing blow. He watched Hawk be brought down by Nocelle’s hands and knew this was very hard on her. He tried to be there for her, but she became closed off to men.
    The Squad 2 Captain was getting old and rusty and retired from service and recommended Hakora for the position. During the captainship test, Hakora requested when he was asked to show his Bankai that only the Head Captain be present. The Head Captain understood and approved the request making him the only person to have ever seen Hakora’s Bankai. Hakora was given the position of Squad 2 Captain.




User Image
    Zanpakutō Name: Kōri (Ice)

    Zanpakutō Type: Ice/ Ninjitsu

    Sealed Zanpakutō: Red wrapped Wakizashi

    Zanpakutō Spirit:
    Kōri


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    Shikai Incantation: Freeze, Kōri

    Release Appearance:

    Shuriken


    Description: Hakora’s zanpaktuo becomes a single foldable Shuriken


    Abilities:
    Icy Wind: Once Shikai is activate, Hakora will cause the sky to become dark as a mix of snow and ice fall causing the battlefield to become icy and slick. The snow makes the scene become harder to see. The snowy world is a 100 yards in radius. The effects do not work on Hakora.
    Ice touch: Everywhere his shrunken cuts, instantly fills the wound and surrounding area with ice. With every cut the person becomes more and more immobile. Until they are cut enough places that they become a ice statue. The ice is not immune to heat. The ice lasts for three posts after the cut due to the coldness of the icy wind
    Ice Cyclone: Hakora will throw his Shrunken a his target and it will create a mini vortex around the shrunken made of ice and wind. If it hits full force it has the ability to cut the target all over and turn them into a ice statue. The cyclone is only as wide as the shrunken which is 3 feet and it's height is 4 feet. This attack only has a distance of 15 feet and the ice lasts 1 post fully and the post following that leaves the user stiff and slow.





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    Bankai Name: Kōri no jigoku

    Bankai Incantation: Roar, Kōri

    Release Appearance:
    User Image]Bankai

    Description: Hakora will fold his shurnike and it will begin to bend and grow a large and complex pole that will make his scythe.


    Abilities:

    Icy World: Exactly like Icy Wind except now pillars of ice form all over the battlefield. The wind during the storm is so strong that it will rip an tear at anyone caught in it and leave small cuts in the skin. if the person is a low rank it may cause frost bite if they stay in it too long. It has a 100 yard radius. The effects do not work on Hakora.
    Ice Serpent: Hakora's scythe will strike scars one the ground covered in ice. The ice will then form as ice serpents that are rather powerful. The bigger the scare, the bigger the serpent. The final serpent is very large and known as the King Serpent.
    Ice explosion: As a last resort, Hakora will channel the deep power of his zanpaktuo and release it in an explosion that will release a freezing power capable of freezing everything in its path for half a mile. Due to the sheer power of it, this will end his Bankai. It is avoidable if someone is fast enough to get out of range or if you have the ability or means to create a protection of heat around you or a powerful Kido. If a strong enough barrier is created then the ice would form around the barrier and they would have to break out. It will only go out in every direction for 100 yards.



User Image
    Hadō:

    1. Shō (衝, Clash)
    4. Byakurai (白雷, Pale Lightning)
    11. Tsuzuri Raiden (綴雷電, Bound Lightning)
    12. Fushibi (伏火, Lain Fire)
    31. Shakkahō (赤火砲, Red Fire Cannon)
    32. Ōkasen (黄火閃, Yellow Fire Flash)
    33. Sōkatsui (蒼火墜, Blue Firefall)
    54. Haien (廃炎, Nullific Flames)
    58. Tenran (闐嵐, Swelling Storm)
    63. Raikōhō (雷吼炮, Thunder Roar Sear)
    73. Sōren Sōkatsui (双漣蒼火墜, Twin-Wake Blue Firefall)
    88. Hiryūgekizokushintenraihō (飛竜撃賊震天雷炮, Flying Dragon Marring Heaven-Shaking Thunder-Sear)
    90. Kurohitsugi (黒棺, Black Coffin)
    91. Senjū Kōten Taihō (千手皎天汰炮, Thousand-Hand Bright Heaven Culling-Sear)

    Bakudo:

    1. Sai (塞, Block)
    4. Hainawa (這縄, Crawling Rope)
    8. Seki (斥, Repulsion)
    9. Geki (撃, Strike)
    9. Hōrin (崩輪, Disintegrating Circle)
    21. Sekienton (赤煙遁, Red Smoke Flight)
    26. Kyokkō (曲光, Bent Light)
    30. Shitotsu Sansen (嘴突三閃, Beak-Thrust Tri-Flash)
    37. Tsuriboshi (吊星, Hanging Star)
    39. Enkōsen (円閘扇, Round Lock Fan)
    58. Kakushitsuijaku (摑趾追雀, Trace-Catching Pursuit Sparrows)
    61. Rikujōkōrō (六杖光牢, Six-Staff Light Prison)
    62. Hyapporankan (百歩欄干, Hundred-Step Rail Parch)
    63. Sajō Sabaku (鎖条鎖縛, Chainlink Chain Bond(s))
    73. Tozanshō (倒山晶, Inverse Mountain Crystal)
    75. Gochūtekkan (五柱鉄貫, Five-Post Iron Weights)
    77. Tenteikūra (天挺空羅, Heavenly Void Net)
    79. Kuyō Shibari (九曜縛, Nine-Daylight Bonds)
    81. Dankū (断空, Severing Void)



    Other:
    Canidae Transformation: Hakora developed the ability to shapeshift into a fox. Most people when they learn this about Hakora they imagine he shape shifts into a fierce black fox with red eyes. In reality, he becomes a normal looking red fox with a white tipped tail, white underside and snout and black tipped ears. He sometimes stays in this state for long periods of time since most people don’t even know he has this ability. When he first learned this ability, he would always end up losing his clothing and people would see him in in the buff during his return to Human form. Over years and years of practice he learned how to transform with clothing and then be clothed when he becomes human. He originally developed this ability for spying and recon missions, but grew to enjoy it and use it often. He can not instantly turn into a fox and he has never been known to use it in a fight as a fox is not that strong.
    Hakuda Master: Hakora is one of the most accomplished hand-to-hand combatants in the Soul Society. He has personally never seen the Head Captain in hand-to-hand combat, but he hasn’t found any captain able to match his Hakuda prowess. When he the 2nd Squad Lt he had an accomplishment and rumor of killing 100 hallows with his bare hands. In reality, it was only 60, but still an accomplishment. He does not ahte using the sword and will use his zanpaktuo when the time calls for it, but prefers to use martial arts even against armed competences.

    Spiritual pressure:
    He does not have Reitsu as intense as Captain Nocelle, but he had a high amount of it and could use a technique known as Shunko and using for vastly long times. Usually he does not keep his reitsu level high or even present so he doesn’t give off that “captain presence” He prefers to go undetected so he has perfected hiding his reitsu signature to a science. He has accurate control of his reitsu to the point that he can instantly channel his reitsu to the palm of his hand and catch a blade without being cut.

    Swordsmanship: He is an master with the blade, not the the degree of some Captains, but when it comes to one strike kills and accurate stabs he is unmatched. He is not master of multiple different styles, just a few. Most of his styles are for assassinations or self-defense as his real fighting is done with his hands. He also keeps small ninja weapons on his person always and has an impressively large amount of Kunais on his person in a battle.

    Shunpo Master: He mastered the ability of shunpo and taught it to others and it became a wide used ability. He is known to be one of the greatest hoho master to ever exist or in existence. His speed is so fast that he has been reported to appear in multiple places at once and able to take out multiple enemies with his bare hands individually and apart. He as perfected a techniche that instead of shunpo for the whole body he can shunpo only parts of his body. These are such high speed kicks or punch that it appears that his limbs disappear before contact. It is a very deadly form and to some it seems pointless, but what it’s purpose is, is to hide attacks. If he is holding a Kunai and wants to get someone in the heart he will shunpo his arm so the opponent cannot see where the attack is going giving his attacks more deadly ability.

    Expert Strategists: Due to his upbringing, he has been trained in birth to plan and execute recon missions. He has been known to use five stealth force members to take out heavily guarded and secure bases of rebels even keeping all his men alive. He has spent a couple thousands of year’s studying human wars and techniques to better increase his Stratagy. He is only good with battles and recon missions, but other things like parties or Captain duties he lacks on.

    Enhance Strength: He is not on the same level as the Squad 11 Captain, but he has been known to shatter hallow masks with a angle punch or even stop a sword with his bare hand. His strength is not a brutal or he man type strength, but a precise and control strength used in precise amounts.

    Senses:
    He has mastered all five of his senses so if one is knocked or not useable then it would not effect his fighting. He has also précised his sight and hearing. His sight is 1/30 and his hearing is like a dog's hearing. His taste, feel, and smell are also greatly increased due to being a fox shapeshifter. This also is a weakness as a bunch of loud noises confuses him.

    Enhanced Endurance:
    Hakora is the type who can, if need be run for 24 straight hours at a high rate of speed without rest. He is not perfection or without tire, but he can count on one hand the people who have seen him tire.

    Kido User: He is no kido expert, but he has learned and practiced it enough that he can use it when need be. Is an expert with binding kido, and a normal captain when it comes to destructive kidos. He can learn kidos and modify them with simple instructions



 
PostPosted: Sat Jul 06, 2013 2:55 pm


Sonus Venti

Remember, only a maximum of three Bankai techniques, so technically a list of moves that you have for his bankai are not allowed.

iChan-Chan
Captain

Tricky Informer


XIII Distant Dream

Shirtless Genius

PostPosted: Sun Jul 07, 2013 12:52 am


iChan-Chan



There I picked three really good ones
PostPosted: Sun Jul 07, 2013 12:56 am


Sonus Venti

Only one problem left that I can see. The first bankai move of the set is worded in a way that can be considered god modding since the Vacuum is worded to be "guaranteed to draw the foe closer." While it doesn't deal damage, it is unable to be avoided. Simply reword that and you should be good to go.

iChan-Chan
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XIII Distant Dream

Shirtless Genius

PostPosted: Sun Jul 07, 2013 1:11 am


iChan-Chan



Ok is that better? Basically if the target counters the attack they must retreat at least a few feet away to not be effected by the vaccum, or does that still border god modding? Hard to not God Mod with a sword style that involes godspeed. razz
PostPosted: Sun Jul 07, 2013 1:14 am


Approved.

iChan-Chan
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 09, 2013 7:27 pm


Counterreviewed. Just one small issue I see, is that you have six Shikai abilities and you are only allowed five. Remove one and you're good to go.
PostPosted: Wed Jul 10, 2013 12:36 pm


Mochii Iced Tea



done

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PostPosted: Sun Aug 04, 2013 5:31 pm


Reapproval review.

Sonus Venti
Icy Wind: Once Shikai is activate, Hakora will cause the sky to become dark as a mix of snow and ice fall causing the battlefield to become icy and slick. The snow makes the scene become harder to see.

Range?

Sonus Venti
Ice touch: Everywhere his shrunken cuts, instantly fills the wound and surrounding area with ice. With every cut the person becomes more and more immobile. Until they are cut enough places that they become a ice statue. The ice is not immune to heat.

In addition to the heat factor, i'd suggest putting a last time on this for how long the ice can stay on a wound. I.e. melts/disappears after 3 posts, etc.

Sonus Venti
Ice Cyclon: Hakora will throw his Shrunken a his target and it will create a mini vortex around the shrunken made of ice and wind. If it hits full force it has the ability to cut the target all over and turn them into a ice statue.

Range of the throw, radius of the ensuing cyclone, melt time of ice, as stated above.

Sonus Venti
Icy World: Exactly like Icy Wind except now pillars of ice form all over the battlefield. The wind during the storm is so intense that someone not captain level would be ripped to shreds by the ice moving so fast and being so sharp.

Range? Is the user also affected by the ice? Also needs a drawback, as you can now autokill anyone that's not a Captain.

Sonus Venti
Ice explosion: As a last resort, Hakora will channel the deep power of his zanpaktuo and release it in an explosion that will release a freezing power capable of freezing everything in its path. Due to the sheer power of it, this will end his Bankai.

Range, drawbacks, countermeasures?

Sonus Venti
Canidae Transformation: Hakora developed the ability to shapeshift into a fox. Most people when they learn this about Hakora they imagine he shape shifts into a fierce black fox with red eyes. In reality, he becomes a normal looking red fox with a white tipped tail, white underside and snout and black tipped ears. He sometimes stays in this state for long periods of time since most people don’t even know he has this ability. When he first learned this ability, he would always end up losing his clothing and people would see him in in the buff during his return to Human form. Over years and years of practice he learned how to transform with clothing and then be clothed when he becomes human. He originally developed this ability for spying and recon missions, but grew to enjoy it and use it often.

Is the transformation instantaneous? I don't want you using it in mid battle to insta-dodge attacks.

Sonus Venti
Shunpo Master: He invented the ability of shunpo and taught it to others and it became a wide used ability. He is known to be the greatest hoho master to ever exist or in existence. His speed is so fast that he has been reported to appear in multiple places at once and able to take out multiple enemies with his bare hands individually and apart. He as perfected a techniche that instead of shunpo for the whole body he can shunpo only parts of his body. These are such high speed kicks or punch that it appears that his limbs disappear before contact. It is a very deadly form and to some it seems pointless, but what it’s purpose is, is to hide attacks. If he is holding a Kunai and wants to get someone in the heart he will shunpo his arm so the opponent cannot see where the attack is going giving his attacks more deadly ability.

The conception of Shunpo was a great deal of centuries before Hakora's age. The original users of Shunpo were the Katena, who now use Enjitsuten due to their corrupted state. Therefore, he cannot have invented it. Also, be careful of your wording. I would change "He is known to be the greatest hoho master to ever exist", to "he is known to be one of the greatest hoho masters to ever exist". It leaves room for the "ultimate" titles to be disputed, as well as giving a chance for equally classed opponents to give you a run for your money.

Sonus Venti
Senses: He has mastered all five of his senses so if one is knocked or not useable then it would not effect his fighting. He has also précised his sight and hearing to a point that he and use them to see and hear for miles. His taste, feel, and smell are also greatly increased due to being a fox shapeshifter.

Miles goes way beyond even the supernatural Shinigami. That means you can literally see past the horizon, and hear whatever the hell you want without being seen or discovered. That falls into the realm of omnisentience, which I consider godmodding.
PostPosted: Sun Aug 04, 2013 9:27 pm


Mochii Iced Tea



I think I made all the changes you wanted to your requirements.

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 05, 2013 10:53 am


Sonus Venti
Icy World: Exactly like Icy Wind except now pillars of ice form all over the battlefield. The wind during the storm is so intense that someone not captain level would be ripped up and left unconscious due to the wind and it has a 100 yard radius. The effects do not work on Hakora.

The second sentence is practically an autokill for anyone that's not a Captain.

Sonus Venti
Ice explosion: As a last resort, Hakora will channel the deep power of his zanpaktuo and release it in an explosion that will release a freezing power capable of freezing everything in its path for half a mile. Due to the sheer power of it, this will end his Bankai. It is avoidable if someone is fast enough to get out of range or if you have the ability or means to create a protection of heat around you or a powerful Kido.

Again, the range. Also, if someone were to create a barrier, would this attack still work for anything behind it?

Sonus Venti
Senses: He has mastered all five of his senses so if one is knocked or not useable then it would not effect his fighting. He has also précised his sight and hearing to a point that he and use them to see and hear up to a mile. hus sight is 1/30 and his hearing is better then a dog. His taste, feel, and smell are also greatly increased due to being a fox shapeshifter. This also is a weakness as a bunch of loud noises confuses him.

Still iffy on the mile thing for hearing. You can be in another topic and be like, oh, I can hear whatever so and so is saying from another topic.
PostPosted: Mon Aug 05, 2013 10:58 am


Mochii Iced Tea
Sonus Venti
Icy World: Exactly like Icy Wind except now pillars of ice form all over the battlefield. The wind during the storm is so intense that someone not captain level would be ripped up and left unconscious due to the wind and it has a 100 yard radius. The effects do not work on Hakora.

The second sentence is practically an autokill for anyone that's not a Captain.

I wasn't trying to make it an auto kill. Just that it would over power a lower rank and knock them out, but isn't that normal for a Bankai to do?

Sonus Venti
Ice explosion: As a last resort, Hakora will channel the deep power of his zanpaktuo and release it in an explosion that will release a freezing power capable of freezing everything in its path for half a mile. Due to the sheer power of it, this will end his Bankai. It is avoidable if someone is fast enough to get out of range or if you have the ability or means to create a protection of heat around you or a powerful Kido.

Again, the range. Also, if someone were to create a barrier, would this attack still work for anything behind it?

I could put a barrier could work, but it is a Bankai attack and his final one and the only barriers I can think of aren't that strong.... Unless you mean a Bankai barrier or something idk.

Sonus Venti
Senses: He has mastered all five of his senses so if one is knocked or not useable then it would not effect his fighting. He has also précised his sight and hearing to a point that he and use them to see and hear up to a mile. hus sight is 1/30 and his hearing is better then a dog. His taste, feel, and smell are also greatly increased due to being a fox shapeshifter. This also is a weakness as a bunch of loud noises confuses him.

Still iffy on the mile thing for hearing. You can be in another topic and be like, oh, I can hear whatever so and so is saying from another topic.


How should I word it then? Just say he has advanced hearing? I am not trying to make him all powerful, just a very apparent choice for stealth captain.

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 05, 2013 11:00 am


Why give him advanced hearing at all? If he transforms, I assume he has all the animal traits of a fox. You just won't be able to hear what you want in human form, but if you're being stealthy, wouldn't you be in fox form in the first place to overhear a conversation?
PostPosted: Mon Aug 05, 2013 11:03 am


Mochii Iced Tea
Why give him advanced hearing at all? If he transforms, I assume he has all the animal traits of a fox. You just won't be able to hear what you want in human form, but if you're being stealthy, wouldn't you be in fox form in the first place to overhear a conversation?



You know in our fight how Nocelle has advanced sight and can see minor details? That is my point, meaning he can use hearing as sight if sight is not an option. If you think it is unnessisary then I shall do as you wish.

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 05, 2013 11:24 am


That's different. That's perceiving moves in a high speed manner, to counter them in what would usually be unblockable moves, due to her slow speed. That works in short distances. It neither gives her the ability to see farther or clearer. Her perception on things are merely enhanced. Hearing, on the other hand, for miles, in a bit extreme. I can understand if you said he can hear whispers from a distance or something. But a mile is really OP. That also means that someone shouting at you could potentially burst your eardrum.
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