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 Posted: Mon May 27, 2013 3:04 pm
PRP between The Dawn of Twilight, Shesha Sama, and Huroggmeten.
Italics = memories/back-story.
Normal = modern-day.
It'll be just Dawn for a while, and then the twins will show up modern-day.
Awendela raised Mauja and Sakari; this is our way of showing how that came to pass.  Awendela (The Dawn of Twilight) Mauja Seiko (Shesha Sama) Sakari Seiko (Huroggmeten)
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Posted: Sat Jun 22, 2013 3:27 pm
The young mare had never served as a midwife before.
She had healed countless scrapes, wounds, and minor injuries... even a major wound before... but she had never brought new life into this world.
Her heart gave a nervous flutter at the thought; the responsibility of not just one life, but many, resting on her and her alone. Mothers have their own battles, but when that mother is wounded... it is the duty of the healer to see everyone through.
Awendela gazed at the sky, closing her upturned eyes to the warmth of the sun as she remembered that chilling winter's day...
The flutter mare was long since due in the meadow. She had agreed to meet the healer there, for she had taken ill late into her pregnancy and both mares feared that Awendela's skill would be needed before the foals were born.
Awendela paced, staring up at the cold mountain as she considered her options.
She could leave, search out the missing mare- and risk not being here when she showed.
She could wait, helpless, hoping the mare had not run into trouble.
Or... She shook her head decisively. She could not just stand here, pacing in worried circles, while the uncertainty of the mare's conditions ate away at her.
She had performed careful healings over the last moon, trying to do enough to maintain the mother's health while still respecting her wishes to let the fates determine her final condition. The flutter mare was a subdued, gentle sort who believed that destiny had something in store for them all- and that destiny should never, ever, be questioned. If one finds love, then love was meant to be. If one looses love, then love was meant to teach. If one must die, then one must die.
The half-unicorn mare calmed herself; it was not her right, nor would she ever presume to, judge the beliefs of others. But something about this mare's belief system grated at her, something about just pure acceptance of things that could have been prevented.
An infection from a wound left untended, a slow-healing bone, a wasting sickness that sapped strength when it was needed most.
These things, it was within her powers to cure. She could lend aid where others could not, and though her gift was diluted by her mixed heritage her devotion to every healing gave her a solid strength. When called for, she would do everything- even if it meant weakening herself with the effort, leaving herself vulnerable so that another might be saved. She was still learning to value herself, for if she pushed herself beyond her limits too many times too frequently until her body simply gave way and her spirit passed on... she couldn't help anyone, then.
Moving forward, her steps firm and steady, the mare set out after the pregnant flutter mare who had so mysteriously missed their rendezvous.
The mare opened her eyes and gazed at the sun, wondering what she could have done differently, if anything, to save that poor mare...
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Posted: Sat Jun 22, 2013 3:55 pm
The snowstorm hit hard upon the mountain; though the first soft snow lightly blanketed the calm meadow, the mountain witnessed cutting winds and a furious onslaught of snow more common to the later months.
Awendela veered towards the line of snow-tipped evergreens that marked the transition from meadow to mountain, where the tawny wicker baskets had been so carefully stored. The two-legged Shaman often placed the unmarked baskets there for the wild Soquili who dared not stray too near the villages, or for those who preferred to birth in silence and solitude or the company of their own kind. Two baskets had been equipped with a carefully-tended leather strap that would allow a four-legged friend to carry them easily across their back, for the Shaman was familiar with the need for a pregnant mare to stay in a safe place and a father or friend to bring the needed vessels to her.
Awendela carefully positioned herself to pick up the precious gifts, thanking any spirits who would listen for the kindness of the two-leggeds while wishing that the Shaman's forethought had not been needed.
As the temperatures continued to drop while she climbed up the mountain, hail began to rain upon the stoic mare's sky-blue form.
She kept her head down, but her eyes scanned the terrain for any sign of the flutter mare. She wondered, again, if she should have tried to prevent the pregnant mare from traveling up the mountain so close to winter- and so late into her pregnancy. She wished that she had gone with her, at least, but she had been needed elsewhere.
She could never turn away someone in need, and she often took on much more than she could handle- but it always worked out, somehow, in the end.
She pressed onwards, reminding herself that the mare had gone in search of the father, a traveling stallion who had a fondness for mountains... and mares. The flutter mare had shyly told her healer that he probably did not even know that he had left her with child, for he had moved on before she had begun to show.
Awendela did not know why the flutter mare thought she might find the stallion on this particular mountain, but she had never been one to question hope.
Her mind was wandering, and she needed all her strength to pass through this storm.
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Posted: Sun Aug 31, 2014 1:29 pm
Awendela sighed, shaking her head at the memories. She would always carry the events of that day, though she sought ever to move on from regret, seeking the light in the darkest of her days.
Though she had failed to save the mare, she had gained a family... oh, she would have traded it all away to see those beloved foals raised by their biological mother, but she loved them with every fiber of her being.
She was their mother, as much as they were her children. Though she had lacked the strength to save their Mother, she had gathered gathered the strength to become their Mom.
A promise was a promise.
She took a deep breath, staring up at the cloudless sky.
She had watched the children grow, change, and mature... she has seen them cling to each other for comfort, learn how to shift forms and when their natural limits had been reached. She had helped them heal, nursed them through sickness, aided and cared for them in every way possible.
She had done her dusty, her task, honored her promise to the dying mare.
Sucking in a sharp breath, Awendela closed her eyes, memories beating at the corners of her conscious mind.
No matter how many times she went over it, she knew... there could have been no other result. The other Healers were too far, if she had tried calling them before them perhaps another they were tending too would have died. She hadn't known, and would not have been able to foretell, the sudden labor caused by stress... she couldn't have physically moved any faster, given any more.
She had given it her all, and it... hadn't been enough.
A simple truth, but one that was hard to bear.
Opening her eyes, tears trickled down her cheeks.
Though she loved her family, she still cried for the mare that should have been there with them. Sorrow gripped her heart, mingling with the love she felt and the loss. Even after all this time, the children grown, there were days when she remembered things all to clearly and was caught in endless spiraling memories. Sometimes linear, sometimes- like now- she could pull away.
She let herself feel, let herself think, knowing that this was the only way to move through the pain to some form of solace. Though she accepted what had happened, as she must, she could not bring herself to let go.
She would never let go, she would always remember.
And yet, perhaps, some day, she would forgive herself for not being... enough.
She had changed, grown, alongside her adopted children as a result of what happened amidst that storm so many years ago. Reflecting, changing, knowing, yearning... all of these things and more had lead her to new heights of understanding and self-knowledge.
She knew her limits. She knew her strengths, her weaknesses. She knew how much she could rely on herself to give, how to push past those moments and flashes of some primal self-preservation instinct, how to give everything she had and yet somehow survive. She knew how to... mother. How to care, to protect, to grow and let go and allow those beloved beings to spread their own wings and soar.
She smiled, tears of happiness mingling with those already spilled.
She was so proud of Mauja, of Sakari... of the Seiko siblings who bore that name in their birth-Mother's honor. They were adults, now, and though she would always care for them as children she understood the need to explore.... out of reach, out of the limits of what protection she could offer.
They were smart, they knew their own limits because she had (to some extent) let them figure those out for themselves. She had loved them enough to let them experience, feel, and see, to become strong individuals who could weather whatever the world chose to fling their way and come out with their self-confidence and self-awareness in tact.
And, yet... they made mistakes. She smiled a little, wry. Such was the nature of life.
Tilting her head back to feel the quiet caress of a gentle breeze, she breathed again, enjoying this day.
Every moment, every memory, was cherished, for without them she would not be... herself.
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