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Posted: Tue Jul 31, 2012 1:46 am
Yin felt Alexander reaching for his hand, but he made no move toward it. The horsewoman was summoning him forward now. There was no sigil to burn off, no obligation to remove. There was almost indignation about being told that he was no fighter…but maybe this was a sign. Maybe he was meant to do something different. When the sentries stepped forward he went along willingly. They were going to take him back. Alexander had chosen this and…he would be okay. He had to be. Then Yin stepped through the portal.
Once more in Halloween…Yin remembered the jungle. He looked around for Alexander, confused. He had just been with him, where was he? Not seeing him, for a scant moment Yin thought that maybe it had all been a horrible nightmare. A quick glance down shattered that small hope as he caught sight of the bracelet the hunters had put on him. Angrily he tore at it, popping it off with surprising ease now that he was back in Halloween and could actually feel Fear around him now.
He stumbled away from the portal, away from others that might come through with the sentries and shifted, his natural form giving him a tiny measure of comfort. But even now the tag was attached to his Fear core. In this form just like the other he was not safe to be around. Despite the shift it was a long and weary walk back toward Amityville and the monster dorms. Each small step was felt, and he pulled himself up the wall on sheer force of will. He often left his window unlocked just in case he came back that way, and now he was grateful as he managed to lift it with a claw and heave himself into the room, all but spilling into it.
Immediately Princess Eva swarmed him, yipping at his legs, full of concern. He shifted partially, still primarily mantis but just enough to give him a bit more humanoid arms, to have his legs shift into two rather than four. The rabo was picked up gingerly with his claws and he cradled her in his arms as he sank down onto the floor, too exhausted to do anymore. Now the full effects of the shock and the horrors were washing over him, tiny details playing out in excruciating detail as he sobbed into the fur of the princess. His compound eyes were not shifted far enough to give him tear ducts, so they were simply dry, heaving sobs and nothing more until he finally gave in to an exhausted sleep, not bothering to get up or fully shift one way or the other.
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Posted: Tue Jul 31, 2012 9:00 am
When Yin was escorted out of the lair it had taken all of Alex's will power not to join him. He'd only just gotten the boil back and was loathe to have him out of his sight even if just for a moment, though it proved to have been quite longer then that. And then, even after deciding to stay, there had been a part of him that regretted the decision. He wasn't a fighter. Wasn't a warrior. This path just felt so wrong for him. But there was an invisible force driving him to continue, pushing him along. Strength and power meant that in the future he might just be able to save his friends and protect them from harm. He hadn't been able to do so for Yin, and that guilt would probably gnaw away at him forever.
When he had finally been allowed to leave the lair, it was with a shiny crystallized portion of his fear hidden inside the skull clip that adorned his very shredded and blood stained tie. He could have chosen to wear it around his neck, or on his wrist, and perhaps one day he would. But for now? Hidden away, just as he intended on hiding Medea's mark from his own mother should he encounter her.
He wasn't sure what he had expected to return to. He had hoped that Yin might have waited for him but there was no weremantis in sight. That filled him with a familiar pang of worry, his mental exhaustion drawing away as unreasonable panic began to set in. But there was something else there to contend with now as well. A flash of anger and an odd hunger that he couldn't quite place. He had to give himself a moment. He needed to just close his eyes and think logically and find some form of calm. Yin had probably just gone back to the school. He'd likely been exhausted, and possibly traumatized from his experience. Alex had been a long time and he couldn't expect that Yin would have waited when all he had probably wanted was to get back home.
With those thoughts firmly in mind, Alexander set off back towards the school. Though he was feeling rather run down and by his looks had obviously taken quite a beating, the zomboil moved at a more accelerated pace then usual.
Go to Yin's room, see the weremantis made it back okay, relax, then worry about what came next. That was the plan.
Some time later Alex was standing outside the door, suddenly feeling nervous. What if he went in and Yin wasn't there? He was almost scared to reach out towards that door, hesitating before steeling himself, turning the handle, and pushing his way quietly inside.
"Yin?" he called out, softly, not wanting to disturb the boil if he was asleep or startle him. He moved slowly into the room, pushing the door shut behind him with a light click before really looking to see...
And yes, Yin was there, though not in any form the zomboil was accustmed to seeing him in and sleeping on the floor. The zomboil let out a sigh of relief, the tension of before deflating out of his body. Fei had wandered up to sniff at him curiously, blue eyes wide and tail flicking before he rubbed up against the zomboils skeletal leg. It was late, and Alex was tired himself, in a sense. He shuffled slowly towards Yin, rubbing at his face with his hands, stopping a few feet away before letting himself sink down to the floor as well, where he just sat, not moving, not blinking, not breathing, and finally let himself have just a moments respite to finally try and relax, as impossible as it may be.
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Posted: Tue Jul 31, 2012 10:22 am
Pale golden eyes watched as the zomboil entered, but the Princess did not move. She had shifted to be comfortable, but she was pressed up against her boil's chest, for once not really sure what to do. She was there, and she was not leaving her place. But this was different than anything that she had ever seen. Finally, after what seemed like a very deliberate moment of debate, she butted her head against Yin's chest, trying to get his attention.
It took a few tries for Princess Eva to succeed, but once he began to wake up it was as if he was shocked awake. There was a moment of disorientation, it was still dark and the only light that filtered in was from the moon. The fact that he was in his own room was somewhat calming, as well as Princess Eva's presence, and he continued to keep her wrapped up in his arms as he sat up, spine popping. The shadowed form that he could now see caused his heartbeat to race as he scooted backwards, fear irrationally seizing at him as various possibilities came to mind. That they had followed him. He was being watched. They were going to take him back. Really, he was still there, he just thought this was his room.
His eyes adjusted slightly, and now he could begin to make out the form, could see that one leg was skeletal, familiar. "Alexander." There was relief in his tone, but it was mostly hidden by the odd way his voice hissed out of him, his mouth still very much that of a praying mantis. Even so he made no move to shift, not wanting to be more humanoid, taking comfort in the form that he wore. That relief changed quickly to worry as memories of the files surfaced. He knew the hunters already had a file on his bonded, that at the least they had his image, that they considered him. If he was their eyes and ears...could they learn more about him? Surely that meant he could not be safe with him. And they could use him. His Fear was their Fear...whatever it was they had done to him with the tagging he was not safe to be around.
Alexander should not be there.
But on the other hand...the hunters had information on him. They knew who he was, they were considering him. They could make things work however they wished to, and he knew that. Someone needed to make sure that he was okay, that they did not ferret him away and drag him down to their questioning chambers. His bonded could not be a weapon, either physically or in Fear. But that did not really help to clear anything up. Yin hunched around Princess Eva, making her whine a bit just from being trapped a bit too much, and stared at the zomboil, mind racing, trying to figure out what to do and coming up blank.
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Posted: Wed Aug 01, 2012 11:26 am
Alex had slipped almost instantly into a near-sleep state, his brain eagerly shutting down to recuperate after the long days of mental and emotional exhaustion. Any amount of rest was better then none for him, at this point, so he was taking what he could get when he could get it. The sudden movement of the weremantis as he sat up and scooted away had Alexander blinking in the dim light of the room, mind beginning to focus once more on the here and now.
"Yin...I..." the words came out quiet, mumbled, and somewhat disoriented, probably inaudible really as he reached up a hand towards the retreating boil, his heart sinking at the realization that his presense had startled his bonded, and had probably scared him as well. As his eyes adjusted to the room, and the dryness and bluriness of his vision was blinked away, he could see that Yin was still in some kind of odd half form of his human looking self and his giant mantis self. It was only offputting because Alex had never actually seen him like that before, but he knew that no matter the look, it was still his boilfriend. Once it seemed that Yin recognized him, he scooted himself forward a little. Maybe he was being greedy, but he wanted to be close to Yin, to be able to touch him and make sure he was real, though he continued to hold back, afraid to do, scared that Yin would reject him, that the other boil wasn't ready for it. A strange flash of annoyance and anger nagged at him at the thought, but he quickly squashed it. Those emotions had no place here. Not right now.
"I didn't mean to startle you.." He murmured, pulling his knees up to his chest and wrapping his arms around them. Perhaps he was trying to make himself look small and unthreatening, which was ridiculous considering how tall he was.
"I missed you after you----" 'left the lair' was how he was going to finish that sentence, except that he never got the chance. A sudden wave of dizziness overtook him, his head swimming in black, his body unfolding as he began to fall to the side, arms shooting out in that direction to stop his fall as his eyes clamped shut tight. What the jack had that been? He eased himself back upright, his eyes opening and falling upon the dark mark etched into the back of his right hand. Oh...right. Not allowed to talk about the lair. But...Yin had been there! He already knew...didn't he? Maybe that didn't matter. Alex licked his lips and tried again.
"Once we got seperated, I was worried about you, and wanted to make sure you got back to your room safely." A weak smile as he tilted his head back up and turned to look at Yin. See, everything was fine here. Alex most definitely did not just about black out mere seconds before.
"Are you..." He hesitated to ask, because it was one of those questions. One of those pointless questions that had an 'obviously not' type answer but one couldn't help but ask anyways. Well, he'd already started now, might as well finish. "Are you okay? Do you need anything? Do you....do you want me to leave so that you can be alone?" He was rambling, yes, his nerves taking over. He could understand if Yin said yes to the last question, even if it made Alex's chest tighten to think that he might be sent away. But still....Yin had been through a lot, and Alex still didn't know what exactly had happened. Giving the boil privacy was doable. He could always just sit in the hallway. That was plenty of space, right?
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Posted: Wed Aug 01, 2012 1:34 pm
"It was dark," Yin tried to explain. Waking up in a dark room with possibly a stranger was really rather disconcerting. His eyes had adjusted though, so as Alexander began talking he actually could see the outline of his body as he began to fall. One claw stretched out as if to help steady him but the zomboil caught himself. He was not quite frowning in concern, his face not able to contort to that expression, but the sentiment was present.
Then again, maybe it was just clumsiness. And if Alexander had time to be worried about him...surely that just meant that everything was fine for the zomboil? If he had been thinking he would have known that that was a ridiculous notion. He was a prime example of one that worried about others even when his own health and safety was on the line.
It was difficult for him to quell an almost hysterical laughter that threatened to bubble up at his bonded's question. Was he okay. Perhaps because of his shifted mouth he was able to prevent the laughter and give him an answer. The only answer that seemed like it could go over well. "I am physically whole." The truth, but a half one. Whole yes, but with more added to it. Mentally...he was not entirely sure. "There is nothing that will...there is nothing that I need."
But did he even want Alexander there? Yes, he wanted to be with him. Liked knowing that the zomboil was there. But now there was a new side of things, something else that weighed on his mind that he had to consider. "You should not have come for me. You should not have endangered yourself like that." His voice was slowly growing louder, angry. Clicks and hisses no longer regulated it made his words a bit difficult to understand, but he was very vehement about what he was saying. He probably should not have been so angry toward someone who had cared about him enough to go after him, who had went through so much to rescue him. But he could not even think about that. All he could see was that file. The photograph. How Alexander could have just been delivering himself to the hunters if things had gone badly. It agitated him and Princess Eva let out a startled yelp as he unconsciously held her a bit too tightly to him.
The noise startled him, and feeling badly he loosened his hold, voice quieter when he finally spoke. "I need to know that you are safe. You will not be safe around me." He was deflating, shoulders sagging as he slumped back, his back finding the wall which was the only thing that kept him upright. Now he just felt tired. Done. "It would be better if you leave." He did not want to be alone...but before Amityville he was used to it. And he had Princess Eva. He could do this on his own.
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Posted: Wed Aug 01, 2012 3:54 pm
Alex had clamped his mouth shut lest he continue on with inane and pointless questions, wrapping his arms around his knees once more and rested his chin on top, face still betraying his concern and worry over the other boil as he bit down on his bottom lip to keep from speaking. It seemed like this should have been a happier moment, not one filled with questions and tensions. He felt like a stranger, like in just this short time somehow things had happened that had just changed things too much, and made knowing where to begin again impossible.
He listened quietly, alarm growing inside of him at the mention of Yin being physically whole. Physically whole. The avoidance of any other issues by that one sentence alone was not lost upon the zomboil. He wasn't stupid, not as much as it might seem like under other circumstances, at least. And the change in what he had been about to say after that, it was odd as well, and suspicious, but he continued to keep himself silent. Just let Yin say what he wanted to say, don't push for more. It was something he had to continue to tell himself over and over again. He'd learned his lessons in the past. Instead he diverted his gaze, studied some of the popped stitches on his arms, the streaks of blood here and there that he'd neglected to take the time to wash off yet. He was sure he must look like a complete mess at the moment.
His gaze shifted back to Yin, a small frown creasing his forehead, as he struggled to understand what the weremantis was saying. It was difficult, with him in this half-form, but the anger was easy to pick out, as were most of the words if he concentrated.
"Oh I suppose you figure I should have just left you for dead or worse?" The zomboil growled, his voice low, that anger that he had been trying to contain surfacing once more, feeding off of that which was being directed at him by Yin. "I did what I felt was right, I have no regrets, and I would do it again." Finally, he felt free to just say what he wanted to say without tip toeing around it, like as though Yin bringing it up first gave him the freedom to do so.
"It's not like I came on my own. I found help. I asked Medea for help, personally, to save you and everyone else. She assured me that I would not be alone." He sounded a little bitter now, because it seemed like his own struggles, his own hard work, his own tears and worries and compromises...they meant nothing to Yin. The other boil would rather just be angry with him, and that was fine, but it meant that Alex was going to be angry too. Still, this wasn't right. This was not how things were supposed to go. They were together again, and that was supposed to mean they could be happy again.
Alex sighed, unwrapping his arms from around his legs and reaching up to rub at his eyes before running fingers through grimy and blood matted hair. "I'm sorry. I---" Wait, what? Not...not safe around Yin?
"What do you mean?" He asked, his voice suddenly dropping to something more quiet as well. Was it like the time that Alex had insanity and was worried for Yin's safety and had asked him to leave? No...no this....this seemed different. At least Yin had known the circumstances of why Alex had felt like he needed to leave. Yin had known about the mental condition, and had suffered through it as well, though his had lasted for less time. Alex knew nothing.
"But I don't want to leave...." A weak argument, but at least he wasn't just giving in, like Yin seemed to be doing. He shook his head, trying to clear it of all the conflicting emotions that were vying for attention, sitting up straighter, speaking again, voice a little stronger then before.
"If you tell me to leave, Yin, I'll leave. But don't presume to tell me what is better, especially if it's what you think would be better for me. I can decide what's good for me, but I need to know more first. If you insist, then yes, I will go but....at least tell me why I should, why it's not safe for me to be with you."
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Posted: Wed Aug 01, 2012 4:35 pm
He deserved the anger, knowing he too would have gone after his bonded. Surprised that the zomboil had actually gone to the high priestess. But Alexander had no idea of what all the hunters could do. What they knew. Yin found himself staring down at his claws, cringing slightly at the anger. The apology washing over him.
Helpless, that was how he felt. Even back in Halloween, in his own room, control had been stripped from him. Alexander said he could order him to leave, but then said he needed to talk to him first. Tell him what happened? He really did not want to know. He would regret hearing the answer. But if that was what it took...
"Did you know that Miss Israfel did not come back with us?" He paused, the memories of why washing over him, and he had to steel himself to continue. To admit it out loud to someone who had not been there. "They let us choose. We were never in danger. Just weak. We got to choose and Miss Israfel chose them." His throat seized up and he had to clear it before he continued. "We watched them weaponize Miss Israfel. It was not a trance."
If only that had been the end of it. His voice was barely above a whisper now. "Hunters have ways of manipulating you. They have ways of making you choose. I chose. I--" His throat closed up again, and he could not keep talking. Weak.
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Posted: Wed Aug 01, 2012 5:22 pm
The anger he had felt was slowly subsiding, but it was still there, burning just below the surface. It was irritating that it wouldn't just go away completely, that he felt like he needed a reason to lash out, and something or someone to lash out at. But he didn't want Yin to be that someone, he knew that much, so he tried to reign it back in under control and keep it locked down. He could see how it was effecting the other boil, the small cringe, the way he looked away, and he didn't like it. It made him feel disgusted with himself.
"Miss Israfel....." Alex said the name quietly, pondering it. Israfel had been one of the names that had been listed with the other missing students, but Alex hadn't known her. Really, Alexander's major concern out of all those who had been gone had been Yin, as he was the only one that the zomboil knew. Of course, he had heard about Amphi from Danny, had known that she was a friend of the demon ghouls, but he didn't really know her. Still, he had gone, knowing that Yin might not even still be alive, knowing that if he could at least save the loved ones of others he was sparing them the grief that he had been feeling.
"They...they made you choose if you wanted to become a weapon or not?" That was what Alex was getting from this, from the way Yin was speaking. Weaponization. It was his worst nightmare, to have that happen to himself, to Yin, to any of his friends or family. To have them transformed into something that only hungered for fear, who forgot all of those they once knew, and to be used against other members of Halloween. The thought alone made him sick, made him flash back to memories of the trance they had both faced during the death trials. That hadn't even been real, and it had been more then a little traumatic for all of them.
And to hear that one of the missing had willingly chosen...A feeling of revulsion now mixed with the nausea, enough to make the zomboil want to vomit. Join the hunters? Fight with them? Become a tool to be used to hurt those you might have once loved? It was unthinkable.
He had no doubt that they could be manipulative. That seemed about par for the course. But he was drawn out of those thoughts by Yin's next words, his stomach and chest suddenly feeling ice cold and hollow. "You..you said you would do it, didn't you?" He barely got the words out, strained past a throat that was threatening to close up tight. He closed his eyes, squeezed them against the burning sensation that was suddenly there, but he had already cried so much for him. He had none left to give.
At that moment he wanted nothing more then the throw himself at Yin, wrap him up in his arms, hold him close, feel his warmth, and bask in the fact that he could still do so. If Yin had said yes then...had they only just saved him in time? He had no idea that he was missing more to this puzzle, and that's all he could now focus on. He opened his eyes, blinked against the pain that burned behind them. "...If you did then...Then I believe you only would have done it if..." He stopped, organizing his chaotic thoughts, "Did you say you would do it to save somebody else?" He didn't want to be so vain as to say Yin would have only done it to save his bonded. It could have been to save any number of their friends, or possibly the other students who had been captured as well. Anyone. Yin was self sacrificing enough that he would have done it. They had promised but...well, if Alex had been in the same position, and had been threatened in a way that made him believe that his family might not be safe, or Yin, or anybody he truly cared about then yes, he would have done the same. It was horrible, but he would have done it.
And below the surface, something still raged inside the zomboil. I feeling of hatred, with a more clear target. Hunters. Humans. The jacking assholes who had done this, who had made all of this happen. Who wouldn't just leave them alone. He wanted them all dead, and the thought alone seemed to satisfy something else deep inside of him, some new hunger. He unconsciously reached over to rub at the mark on top of his right hand.
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Posted: Wed Aug 01, 2012 6:58 pm
It would have been nice if there had been more light. If he could really see the zomboil rather than just outlines and vague shapes. But if he had been able to see, if he had noticed the actual revulsion that Alexander had felt, maybe it would not have helped. And of course, he would still have to actually look at the other boil.As it was he could hear how strained his words were as he questioned him about his choice. The zomboil knew him too well, knew how weak he was, how pathetic.
"Yes, it was to try to save others from that fate," he confirmed when he could speak again. But he said it almost numbly. It did not change anything, he would have reached the same end regardless. But there was more, so much more that he could tell him about. But it seemed to him as if it was already obvious. He was clearly separated from Alexander who no longer made any sort of move toward him, and he was dangerous. That was something that did not seem to be getting through. He needed to tell him, but the though, the idea of how repulsive he would seem...what Alexander would think of him...no, he could not tell him. Not exactly.
"Just because I am here does not mean anything," he finally settled on saying. "I could still be a weapon. I am still dangerous. Other things happened. It is not good for you to be with me, and it would be for the best if you left." He could hear himself talking, but it seemed oddly distant. "I simply desire to be alone right now." It was a lie, and something inside of him clawed against the idea, not wanting to be alone. Not wanting to be in a room that felt empty, where he would be alone, vulnerable. But he had to protect Alexander. They could not get additional information about him.
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Posted: Wed Aug 01, 2012 7:54 pm
Yin should have known by now that Alex would have never thought of him as weak. Being willing to sacrifice himself to save others was not being weak. If he had just given in for no other reason then maybe...but no. He was doing it to save others. That was the important part.
Alex unfolded himself slowly, moved to his hands and legs, and crawled forward. It was probably a bad idea. Yin would probably move away from him, likely didn't want to be touched or have the zomboil anywhere near him at the moment. He still didn't understand the why however. He had made it back. He was okay. He wasn't a weapon. They were reunited, back together, and should have been happy at least about that. A lump was building up in his throat, and he swallowed past it, as he turned to sit next to Yin, to lean back against the wall as well, tilting his head to the side so that he could see Yin's face.
"I don't want to leave." He repeated, his pale eyes sad but somehow finding it in himself to sound firm. Was it too much to ask for a single moment where they could just pretend things were fine and he could hold Yin in his arms? Tentatively he lifted an arm, to place around Yin's shoulders, inwardly steeling himself for the moment when the other boil would pull away and drive the dagger home, so to speak. He could insist that he get to stay. He could be stubborn, if he wanted to be, though that stubbornness could probably be over ridden by a simple command from Yin to go, as much as he could try and stand up against it. And besides that.....what Yin was saying, it sounded almost final. Like if he left, he wouldn't be allowed to come back. He couldn't have that. He didn't care how dangerous Yin believed himself to be. He couldn't just leave if it meant things were over. If it was temporary..then maybe. But Yin wasn't giving him all of the information. Again. As usual.
"It's not good for me to not be with you." He said, desperately trying to reason with the weremantis now. "I'd just..get myself hurt..." Likely while trying to kill as many hunters as he could. "I need you, Yǐn Cáng. I didn't fight to get you back to just leave now. I just...I want to understand what's happened, and why you don't want me around, and why you seem like you don't want to tell me." He was getting a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach now. Something was definitely wrong, and it was more then what Yin was saying. He had to try and reason out what the weremantis had already told him and try and figure it out from there. He was still dangerous. Other things happened. It wasn't good for Alex to be with him. He..he really couldn't figure it out. Yin was talking like he might hurt him, but if he was going to do that, why hadn't he done so already? No matter how he tried to work it out in his head, it didn't make sense.
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Posted: Wed Aug 01, 2012 8:41 pm
It was aggravating. Alexander kept saying that he would leave, that if he got answers he would leave. Yin kept trying to supply him with answers that he was comfortable with, trying to get him to leave and not put himself in unnecessary danger. Even so when he felt the arm around his shoulders, the cold almost burning against the mostly mantis skin, he found himself wanting to just relax into it. To turn his head just a little bit farther and rest there for a while like everything was going to be okay. He toyed with the idea, about to give in, when the zomboil began speaking again, piling on fresh aggravation. Not good for him? It was the only way that it could be. Yes, he had fought to rescue him, but it had been a risk that Yin had never wanted him to take. Normally he had no qualms whatsoever with the zomboil being there, but when he did...he would not listen. He leaned forward, shrugging the arm off of his shoulders. "You said you would leave if I told you to, and now you threaten to get yourself into trouble if you do not stay?" A flash of his earlier anger was returning. Princess Eva whined at him, upset by his tone, but he ignored her. In fact, he moved her rather brusquely to the side, and stood, taking a couple of steps toward the door. "I have said enough on this matter for the day. You can either leave or I will, I have had enough of your questions." There, he had said it. It would probably hurt his bonded, and the thought made him ache deep down. But in the end it was for the zomboil's own good. Maybe he could talk about being tagged on a different day, when it was not so raw. When he had come to terms with it himself. For now he just could not risk it, would not risk him. Really, it was for his own good. Maybe one day he would understand that.
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Posted: Wed Aug 01, 2012 9:42 pm
He had just let his arm relax, thinking that Yin was going to be okay with it, and thus everything could still be fine. Really, it was the first time he had touched the other boil that wasn't just him grabbing on to something to keep him upright. It was nice, to finally feel that warmth that he had grown so accustomed to against his cold undead skin once more. He had needed this. Had needed to feel Yin, to know that he was real and actually there and...
Arm shrugged off, happy moment gone.
"You didn't tell me to leave, you simply said you thought it was for the best. I'm telling you I don't want to leave. You...I...I didn't threaten anything! I just said exactly what I felt." That was it. He'd had enough. He could feel the anger bubbling up inside of him again. How long had they known each other now? They had been friends, then best friends, then bonded. Months upon months. Building up trust, working on a relationship that now seemed like it was doomed from the start. Had it all been for nothing? Was Yin really going to cast him out now, without giving him the real reason why?
It seemed like he was. Yin was standing up, moving away towards the door. Alex rose up himself, springing to his feet in a movement of speed that was highly uncommon for the zomboil. "Fine." He growled. "That's just fine. No more questions then." He was moving towards the door himself, stopping when he reached it, hand on the door knob, his emotions in an utter turmoil.
It was supposed to be better now. Not worse. It wasn't supposed to feel like his heart was turning to ice inside of his chest, like somebody had just punched him in the stomach. He most definitely shouldn't have been this angry, ready to scream, shout, throw things, and punch the wall in a tantrum of epic proportions. No. He could control himself, surely.
Yes, he could apparently restrain himself. Though there were words. So many words that he wanted to say. None of them were pleasant, and he was forced to bite his tongue back against them. Yin didn't deserve it. Not now. Not just after he got back. Maybe there would be a chance for him to say these things another time, or maybe he'd never have to. But maybe Alex didn't deserve this either, and that thought nearly sent him into on his more dangerous state of mind. The one where he said things he didn't really mean later. The one where he attacked first and thought later and regretted every action he made.
No, he needed to get out of here. Now. The anger was burning through him, and it was clear in how he stood, in the set of his jaw, as he swung the door open perhaps a little bit more forcefully then necessary, "No. You just stay here. Relax. Enjoy the rest of your evening, alone." the tone of his voice as he struggled not to say more, to just leave it at that and get the hell out of dodge before he did anything really stupid.
And then he was out the door, in the hallway, and moving away. Away from Yin, whom he'd only just gotten back. Letting the anger burn through him, to distract him, to keep him from caring, from turning around and apologizing, and from begging for Yin to let him stay. This had been Yin's choice, and Alex was only providing just want the weremantis wanted.
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Posted: Wed Aug 01, 2012 10:11 pm
Of course, in Yin's language saying that it would be for the best was a very strong indication that that was what he wanted. If Alexander could not accept that, understand that, so be it. He had his own goals, his own reasons. He was a danger, someone who would sell out, would run away. He forced himself not to wince as the growled voice reached his ears. It hurt, but he refused to show it. He reminded himself why he was doing it, that in the end this would be worth it. Maybe. Hopefully.
The tone of the voice said it all, the words not actually necessary. He had done what he wanted to. He had made sure that at whatever cost Alexander got away from him. Where he could be safe. He would be okay, Yin was sure of it. Right?
Right?
Panic began to set in. Alexander was not exactly incorrect when he had mentioned that he could be hurt without him there. But this was much easier to deal with. Yin knew what to do now. He shifted now, going back to his usual student form. Nondescript. Out the window, around to the front of the dorms quickly. Staying in shadow, hiding behind the edge of building as he watched the front doors for Alexander to emerge. Then he was putting all of his skills to work, slipping from tree to tree, making use of his surroundings. He would follow Alexander, from a distance, all but invisible, until he got to wherever he was going. After he made sure that there were no hunters lurking to capture him while he was out alone at night. Once he was safe in a building...then he could go back to his room. Then he could be alone.
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Posted: Wed Aug 01, 2012 11:13 pm
If Alex knew he was being followed, he gave no clear indication of it, but Yin was going to find that he was going to be following the zomboil for quite some time before he finally gave in and took himself to his dorm room for the remainder of the night, and probably for the entire next day as well.
It was brutal, really, the amount of carnage a zomboil in rage mode could conduct if given a chance to do so, when thinking that he was alone with nobody around to watch him or judge his actions. Normally slow, the zomboil seemed to move at a much more accelerated pace then usual. The assorted mini's he encountered didn't really stand a chance, and the ground lay littered and bloody in a trail behind him.
A soft buzzing sound, combined with a chime, had the zomboil stopping, head tilting to the side, pale eyes flashing in the moonlight. It took him a moment to realize that it was just his phone, and he reached into his pocket to extract it, something else falling out as well and he bent down to pick it up. Yin's badge. He had taken it with him when he'd gone with the others to the hunters island. It had made him feel slightly safer, like maybe a small part of Yin was still with him. His hand suddenly clenched tight around it, shaking, before he shoved it back into his pocket with angry force.
And now for his phone. He glanced at the screen. He seemed to stare at it for a long time, his face a blank mask, before his features contorted. An angry scowl, a lip pulled back from his teeth. He whipped his arm back and threw the phone at the nearest tree, watching it with some satisfaction as it shattered. Later he'd be sorry he'd done that, and would have to go out and buy a new one with the money he'd saved from work, but for now he just glared coldly at the small pathetic electronic device that lay in a small and useless heap on the ground before he stalked off, back towards his dorm room finally. He had packing to do.
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