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 Posted: Fri Jul 13, 2012 2:52 am
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Posted: Fri Jul 13, 2012 2:54 am
Kyran had been around, he wasn't actually deliberately hiding, he had been sticking close in the hopes that Crown would look for him, or call out, or something. He knew it was probably cruel but he always came to Crown and while he was growing more and more attached to the stallion... Attached to the point of distraction, more so as he was still hanging around like a bad smell instead of having gone back to the mountains. But it was all for nothing if it was one sided. So he had stepped back a little, letting Crown decide what he really wanted, knowing he was still strugling with his nature.
As it was, he had curled up in the trees where they met the waters edge, close but out of sight, his armor protted agaisnt a tree so he could sleep. His lion type tail curled around him as he rested. It had been lonely, a kind of torture watching but always apart. What had been worse had been how it seemed Crown was miserable and getting more depressed. His resolve was weakening, but he was trying to do what he thought best...
Crown had left Eden and Orion and their happy news wondering just what he was meant to do... he was jealous of their happiness, as if it would always be unobtainable for him, and perhaps foals really would be... he had never been attracted to a mare, so how exactly would he ever have a family? Though it was probably best that he didn't, what if he did something really bad and destroy the poor mare and the 'family' they created? Right now Crown didn't doubt his destructive power at all, he would never be able to love the mare, and he wouldn't know what to do with foals that looks so much like a creature he would come to feel nothing but guilt towards.... and then there was another problem. Kyran. Ok, so it wasn't a 'problem' as such but an ache in his heart that Crown was still trying to sooth, a knot he was still trying to unravel... something he was working on, something that had lead to the recent conclusion that.... he loved Kyran. Such a ridiculous notion given how little they knew or saw each other, but it was true all the same. With a heavy sigh he trudged on.
At first he had come to the forest looking for Kyran, but with each ignored call, with each lonely step he had slowly started to give up. He wasn't here, was he? And the worst part was that Crown had no idea where he was or how to find him. Kyran had always come to him... for a moment Crown wondered how hard it would be to search the mountains for Kyran... but which mountains, and what would he do if he missed the guy and ruled out that particular range? Yeah, that wasn't going to work. Crown found himself next a river that fed into the lake. The sound of water washing over him. He looked into the surface of it and couldn't help but wonder what is there to like about me? As far as Crown could see the answer was nothing. His mother had told him that he was her special boy, but wasn't that just code for someone who didn't have a good quality that could be identified?
Oh man, he was starting to get manic with this dark thoughts. He needed to stop. Needed to.... he didn't know what. Move on? Give up? It seemed so cruel, and just when he had finally come to understand his feelings. Using the water as a small distraction he took a drink of the cool and calming liquid.
Kyran shifted in his sleep, a hoof knocking his armour over with a loud clang. His head shooting up at the noise, looking around sleepily, identifying the noise as his armour his head rests back down again, just a few more minutes, thne he would look for Crown and decide on what to do, either go to him or stay waiting like he had been for days now.
Crown heard a noise.... a loud noise. Metal? It sounded different to Eden's traps of wood and stuff... but still, maybe she had upgraded or changed one of them? He wasn't sure but he knew he had to check it out. If anything he was thankful for the distraction, even as he hoped it wasn't Kimi back for more! Head held high he carefully headed in that direction. He hated that he had to give 'warning', it seemed so silly and gave away his possition... but that was the rule, an Angeni could never do harm for the sake of harm after all and since Maion was the guardian it was to be expected that he would want the rest from everyone else, Crown was only half Angeni, and while his wings were very much like a single pair of Angeni wings he looked more like his wind father. "Who is there?" He asked, his voice confident and strong, "Show your self. You have enter the Mia-" He stopped the moment he saw a lion's tail.... grey.... he looked to see... armour.... and as he got closer and closer he realised his assumption was right. "Kyran?" What was the guy doing out here all alone? Sleeping again? The second time they had met the guy had been sleeping too.... Heze and Eden had been there this time. Part of Crown wondered if he should run away, as if he was suddenly not ready for this meeting... his heart started pounding in his chest and knew what he had to do... it was just so hard to do. Stay. Talk. Explain.
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Posted: Fri Jul 13, 2012 2:56 am
Murmering still half asleep. "I'm here Crown." Yawning and shaking his head to wake up more as he sits up and looks around. Standing and streching, awake now, his eyes running over Crown, taking in his posture and expression, his eyes sad, not having a huge ego but feeling bad if he had anything to do with what seemed to be upsetting Crown. "Whats wrong?"
Crown didn't need Kyran to tell him he was here, after all Crown was currently looking down at the guy, and with that armour plate and distinctive colour he was pretty sure the gut couldn't have been anyone else... though he supposed he had never met the guys family. He had been about to just say something when he Kyran spoke again, the words taking him back. What's wrong? Did Crown really look upset? For that was the impression he got from those quietly spoke words. He shook his head and tried to smile though he was sure the action didn't quite reach his eyes. He was torn... torn between just wanting to spend time with Kyran and torn as to how express and explain himself. Should he even? Rejection was a possibility after all, one that Crown wasn't sure his heart would survive.
He cleared his throat before speaking, "Nothing is wrong." His eyes looked to the armour then, as if looking at Kyran too much almost hurt. "I think something hit your plate... the noise drew me here." he admitted softly, not elaborating that he had originally thought Kyran to be a possible intruder... had even partly wished for that. He fell silent again, eyes still looking at the plate covered in a 'bat' skull. He should say more... act normal. He knew that, Crown really did, but all that came out was, "How have you been?" Crown was rather oblivious to the fact that Kyran had been hanging a round, oblivious to the fact that the guy had watched him from afar, had seen him in a way that would embarrass Crown should he ever learn the truth.
Kyran looked at Crown, trying to decide what to tell him, he had missed him... he was lonely... Wanting to kick himself for just standing there when what he wanted was to hug Crown close. But he didn't want to influence Crown, it would break his heart if he let himself get that far, to care and think he was with Crown, a proper relationship... Only to have the stallion relise he liked a girl, or that he was only with Kyran because he was always around. Thats why he had stayed away, not knowing what else to do he had given Crown space to let him make his own choices while he was still near by. But he couldn't just blurt all that out at Crown, so he looked away, looking at the armour, vaguely remember kicking something in his leep, thinking that must have been it. "I've been ok.... around... you know..." Shrugging never havign been far, knowing that a few of the herd had seen him, but not Crown.
"Ah... well... that's good?" Crown had meant it as a statement but it had ended up more like a question, as if he was sensing the hesitation in Kyran's voice and it was effecting his own. He frowned a little... why did it feel so awkward between them? Why, did Crown have the impression that Kryan was purposefully keeping his distance... as if the guy didn't want to get near Crown or have anything to do with him... was it... could it be... had Kyran found someone else? Had Crown waited too long? He frowned a little at that. His body taking a half retreating step backwards. Crown couldn't bare the idea... couldn't stand the thought of Kyran with someone else, and he supposed that was just more proof of how he felt about the guy.
Since Kyran hadn't asked or said anything beyond his slight words Crown fell silent, not sure what he should do or say, no sure how he should think... what was truth? What was his imagination? Everything was so confused and clouded, and part of Crown hated himself for feeling this way.
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Posted: Fri Jul 13, 2012 2:58 am
Almost able to feel the distance yawning between them Kyran couldn't look at Crown, his eyes going to the water, not wanting the gap to get any bigger, so he said the first thing that came out his mouth. "I've been waiting for you..." Inwardly groaning, that made him sound like a love sick puppy, then again he had been waiting, so he might as well explain. "I never left... I just waited around, out of everyones way... Hoping you would come looking for me..." Ok so he had oficially fallen into pathetic as a category, or stalker... He wasn't sure which, but it was probably best to put his armour on he felt bare in more ways than one and at least the familiarity of the armour would give him some kind of buffer. Moving away from the water towards where he had put his armour to do just that.
Those words.... Crown had never expected those words. His head practically snapped up to look at Kyran, to really look at him. Not that the guy was looking at him at all... Crown's mouth felt too dry to speak, his mind too busy buzzing that he had no idea what to say or not say. So for a moment he simply gawped at the guy... not exactly smooth but he was far past that point now.
Was it true? Why was Crown so desperate to have it be true? He hadn't seen the guy once, hadn't seen a sign of him... and as far as he knew no one else had seen him either. Was it possible that Kyran was simply trying to make him feel better? To cover the real truth? His head dropped again, and before he could stop it a single tear escaped from each of his eyes. Rolling like thunder down his face, the large and heavy droplets soon dropped from his nose the ground... almost loud enough for Crown to hear the 'crash' of impact; ok, so it was probably just his imagintion but suddenly everything seemed so loud. The wind in the trees. The water as it ran over rocks. His own heart. His own breathing. All too loud.
He gulped, shaking his head as if trying to force himself to focus.... he needed to say something, he knew that, he needed to... anything! He opened his mouth, but to Crown's surprise nothing came out. He simply looked like a fish gasping for air. Promptly he shut the thing, not wanting to look even more pathetic than he already did.
Stoppig by his armour he glanced at Crown and was floored, he was crying?! Not even thinking about it he moved over and nuzzled Crown, pressing close as he hugged him, wrapping him in fluff and wings, whatever he had that could reach. "Shhh its ok, close your eyes, feel me breathing, listen to my heart beat... Its ok." Holding him close, wishing he had those arm things that the two leggids had, wanting to hold Crown and never let him go. Closing his own eyes, his breathing steady, like the thump of his heart. "I wont let anything hurt you." Placing a kiss to his neck as it was what was nearest to his nose while he tried to calm and comfort Crown.
To say Crown was shocked when he felt Kryan wrap him up in his warmth, to feel him nuzzling him and burying his nose into Crown's neck.... well, that would have been an understatement. The action completely floored Crown, and for some reason that only made the tears start more steadily. Why was he crying? He wasn't even sure, all he knew was that he was... as if all his pent up energy and emotions simply needed a vice, any vice to escape. A little hesitantly at first he moved his head closer, holding Kyran just as fiercely as he was being held.
Silence spread between them for a moment, and Crown didn't feel the need to fill it, he simply allowed his tears to fall. When they slowly started to dry up he knew it was time to speak. "I've.... I... have been thinking about you." He admitted, his voice quiet, as low as a whisper, but that was ok given how close they were. "A lot actually." While Crown never said exactly what he had been thinking he realised he had made a start in revealing his true feelings if nothing else... it wasn't as if they were things to casually be tossed around after all, and even with Kyran holding him close like this he feared rejection. Maybe, maybe...! Too many question, too many excuses.... Crown forced himself not to think about all the If, Ands and Buts.
Needing to say something, anything, Crown said the first thing that popped into his head. "My sister... is having babies."
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Posted: Fri Jul 13, 2012 2:59 am
Not feeling the need to fill the silence till Crown spoke, simply letting him cry, whatever the reason was, his fluff easily soaking the damp up. "I've been thinking about you too, all the time...." He had too, when he was awake he had loitered out of sight, watching, hoping, day dreaming... When asleep he didn't notice a difference, often dreams with crown in had come upon him. Though the last perked his ears up, feeling a small stab of loss at the news. "Then theres a good cause to celebrate, nothing is as special as when foals are born." Something he would never see, there would be no little copy of him or a little mix of him and the one he loved most. He had never really thought himself a family man, but then it was only after his fight with his father that he fully realised everything his basic nature would cost him. He had grieved then, it was probably dumb to grieve over something that would never be, but he had. And then he had accepted it and moved on, he was not meant to be a fahter, so be it, he would find another purpose.
Crown found himself blushing as Kyran pretty much said the same words back to him. Part of Crown hadn't expected that.... he wasn't really sure what he had been expecting.
Celebrate, he knew Kyran was right... his sister was so happy, and Crown knew that once the foals were born he would be over the moon about them too. Would spoil them in all the ways he would never get to spoil his own... after all, two stallions couldn't reproduce, could they? It wasn't how nature worked. Although he would never, and he really did mean never, tell his sister any of what he was about to say... part of him just needed to get it off his chest, to have someone to talk to it about, someone who might also understand... even if Kyran was only playing with him, as his mind continued to whisper, at least he would understand.... right? "Yeah... she is really happy about it. But..." He closed his eyes, feeling shame for feeling this way, but even more due to the fact he was about to voice them. "...I can't help but... well... hate her for it." How could he feel that way! He loved his sister, she had always been there, they had always been there for each other... so why.... why?!
Feeling awkward in his own flesh he pulled out of Kyran's embarace and looked to the ground, his cheeks and eyes red from his tears and blush. He felt hot and flushed. He felt as if his heart was about to explode from his chest. Slowly he looked up at Kyran, taking in those beautiful eyes, the fluffy pelt, the wings so different to his own.... and he realised what he had to do. Even if he was rejected, at least he would have closure. "I like you." He blushed brighter but he didn't take his eyes off Kyran, the guy deserved at least that much. "I really like you.... but.... I could never give you children."
Kyran watched him as he pulled away, not overly surprised by Crown's words, after all he had felt that ping of loss too. Giving a gentle and understanding expression as he nodded, knowing that he was probably going to mix thigns up a little, but hoping that he made some kind of sense. "I like you too Crown, a lot.... I mean... I know I'm a flirt, gender has never really mattered for that, and till you... thats all it was flirting, my heart never got involved... But when I had that fight with my father... I realised something... I didn't like it, I cried and raged against it for a few days but I accepted it all the same..... Not everyone is meant to be a parent, some of us are just supposed to be everyones uncle I guess... At least you can be there for your sister... I know you don't really hate her or any of this... you just feel what I felt... that loss.... the IF only.... the wish that somehow there was a way to see a little face with your hair and the ones you loves eyes." He shrugs. "Sadly wishing on a star only works some of the time... But liking you has nothing to do with children or no children..... I like you for you, I stayed because of who you are. And IF in one of the many possible futures from this moment we decide that we want children, we can work out a way, or adopt, I'm sure there are many foals out there that are alone and in need of love.... But thats a long way off... for now lets work out what US is? hmm?" Feeling a little uncomfortable about his somewhat long speach, wondering if he revealed more than he should.
Crown listened, though he only really understood parts of it. Still, a few things stayed with him. One, it didn't matter if he didn't have children. Two, Kyran was talking of a future.... perhaps even with children? Though Crown wasn't really sure how any of that would work. Three, US. Kyran wanted to work out the us that Crown had only recently accepted into his heart. Sure, he had accepted (mostly at least) that he liked stallions... but beyond that it seemed the ideals and traditional notions he saw all around him had stopped him from fully accepting that part of himself. He should have had more faith in Eden's words. He would be loved no matter who he loved, male or female.
"Us?" He said, not really to Kyran but more as a voicing of his thoughts. Crown didn't dislike the thought at all, if anything he liked it... though a part of him had lost hope that such a concept was even possible. "Us." He repeated, this time a little stronger, more as a statement of fact than a statement. Slowly he looked up at Kyran and smiled, "What.... eh... do you want to work out?" He was rather clueless about everything, but Crown wanted to at least show he was willing.
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Posted: Fri Jul 13, 2012 3:18 am
Smiling in response Kyran shrugged, he was just happy to see a smile on Crown's lips. "I've never had an us... I suppose the most important thing is to know if thats something we both want?" Not kowing how others worked out their relationships but that had to be part of it right?? Moving a little closer to Crown. "I'd like there to be an us..... to see if maybe.... maybe there could be a future together.." After all he didn't go all weird stalker soquili on anyone else, the thought that he had gone that far kind of creeped him out. But then he had needed to be close enough to find, and being so close he hadn't been able to stop himself watching from afar... Gah! He was love sick he had to be!... Love... He would have to tell Crown that sometime soon... Once the other stallion was more comfortable being different maybe.
I've never had an us... That made Crown happier than he would like to admit, but he didn't voice that, well outside of the fact that his smile might have seemed just a little brighter. Still Kyran had a point.... it did need to be a two way thing, and suddenly he had to wonder again if that was what Kyran wanted?
Crown didn't have to wonder long though as Kyran moved a little closer, making Crown notice the near hesitation in the others movements. Once again he found himself floored by the words he recieved, having not expected them at all; well maybe he had hoped when the us had first been brought up but Crown was just too stubborn to accept it until that moment.... "Me too." He said, not hesitating to reply as soon as Kyran had finished speaking. He laughed and shifted a little awkwardly on the spot, feeling oddly exposed to the other in that moment... which, honestly, was a very silly emotion given that Crown hadn't been the one to 'go first' on this occassion. Back home Crown was surrounded by happily mated couples, but that didn't mean he really knew or even understood the first thing about 'love' and 'courtship'.... especially when both parties were male. Was he meant to court Kyran the same way many did their mares? Or would treating the guy like a mare make him hate Crown, Crown couldn't imagine liking being treated like a mare!? So complicated, it wasn't as if he could ask for advice on any of this either. Eden knew how to adapt to her timid mate, but it wasn't as if Eden was overly outgoing herself.... Heze had her hooves full with tending Haki, and to be honest Crown wasn't sure if they were 'together' or just 'friends' anyway... plus, it would seem strange going to her for advice on this. Sengdroma knew how to bring an Angeni as strong and wild as the Ocean to his knees... but this wasn't something Crown wanted to discuss with her either, he wasn't overly sure the older mare would understand. No, he was in new territory and on his own.... well on his own with Kyran at least. "I'm not really sure," he started, "About what we're meant to do next." he laughed a little nervously, "I mean.... when the rest of my herdmates find their other halves they can't wait to show them off to the rest of the herd, and then the whole mating ceremony and baby talks all begin...." Oh crap! Had he really just said all that? He blushed brightly, hoping that Kyran wouldn't be offended by what he had just said or something, or that he hadn't just said too much. In an effort to 'fix' the situation Crown quickly tried to add, "I mean... well.... eh.... I'm lost." He settled for those last words knowing he was only digging his own grave.
He started laughing, a silent one ar first but it grew into a chuckle and thne a proper laugh. He didn't laugh long, but when he was done he grinned at Crown. "Now your stumbling words seem to imply you think I'll be insulted that your not showing me off to your herdmates... You worry far too much Crown." Turning he wandered to the water and had a drink, speaking when he had esed his dry throat. "I don't really have a clue either." Wandering back towards Crown and offering a slightly lopsided smile. "Its not like we play by the rules anyway, if we did we would be chasing mares not eachother.... Besides its not like my eye has wandered from you in a while now." Sure he had glanced at others and found thme attractive, but it was a passing thought, as generic as any other with abot as much feeling or intent behind it as if he had said 'oh look pretty flower' instead.
Crown had partly been thinking just the opposite actually, he had been thinking that he would have liked to show Kyran off, though he was nervous about how everyone would react... plus, Crown wasn't sure he was confident enough for that yet, maybe, when he felt more secure about everything he would do just that.... but to introduce him and then have him leave? Well that would likely destroy Crown more than if Kyran just left. Still, it seemed Kyran was right about one ting. He did worry too much.
His eyes followed the movement of Kyran's body, the way his fluff bounced and wings wiggled as he walked to get some water. Crown wasn't completely sure why, but he rather liked watching the movements... and suddenly he felt as if he understood a secret spoken only between couples; the simple enjoyment that came at just watching the one that meant so much for you. Afraid of being caught he looked away, though he was still smiling. Fainting interest in a nearby tree he only turned back when Kyran spoke again.
And while Crown listened, truely listened he realised something.... Kyran wasn't from around here; he had been staying and lingering for his sake but didn't really have anywhere to return to. Which gave Crown a twang of guilt. "Firstly..." He decided, "....well, I think we need to figure out a better arrangement. You shouldn't just be waiting for me, or me waiting for you. So... eh..." What was he trying to say? It all seemed so much simiplar in his head. "...we need a middle ground? I dunno, maybe a place we both return to at night? Or... well... whatever." He frowned a little then, his eyes wandering from Kyrans face and down the guys body to his legs. "I don't want you so.... isolated."
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Posted: Tue Aug 21, 2012 2:34 am
Unable to resist he edged closer to Crown and leaned in close, nuzzling his neck and looking up at him all coy, really hamming it up as he did. He was a flirt and he liked to play around and Crown was sometimes hard not to tease, but only a little, he didn't really want to upset Crown and when things went wrong he really did feel bad. "Are you asking me to live with you.... Alone???" Eyes twinkling and smiling, he really was teasing but he knew Crown was right, but he couldn't help himself the stallion looked so damn adorable when he blushed.
"That... I..." Kyran's actions, the playfullness mixed with innocence upon his face as he looked up at him made Crown's heart skip a beat; he felt overly self conscious in that moment his blush returning full force. He wasn't sure what to say, his mouth felt too dry again.
The embarrassement at what he had said kept flooding over him and he found himself scruntching his eyes up tight as he couldn't bare to look at Kyran in that moment... just like he didn't want to pull away either. So many conflicting thoughts. "Yes." He said on a slight huff.
Lifting his head, the teasing havign faded from his face, looking at Crown seriously. "You should be close for your sister, I know if I had a sister that I'd want to be close to her for this time." He knew Crown loved his family, he didn't want to take him away from them. Though he couldn't deny the thrill that passed through him at the thought of sharing a space with Crown, of snuggling with him every night. He stepped back before his urge to hug him again and plant a kiss on him took over. They needed serios talking and.... those were very distracting things....
Kyran's words had him opening his eyes, and the moment he did he wished he hadn't. The expression he saw was suddenly too serious for Crown's liking, and that coupled with the guys words made Crown feel incredibly sad... and disappointed. "So that's a no." He said under his breath, more to himself than to Kyran. He laughed a little at his own foolishness, he had asked for too much it seemed? Moved too fast. The problem was that now that he had been turned down, and that was how Crown was taking it, he just wanted to run away. He fell silent, and looked to the forest, the dirt, the sky, anything really that would stop him looking at Kyran.
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Posted: Tue Aug 21, 2012 2:34 am
Shaking his head. "No.... Its not a no... I'm just trying not to be selfish.... Trying really hard..." Sighing he rubbed his nose against his leg like he had an itch. "I want a place for us, somewhere I can snuggle you and that we can just be us.... Somewhere I can kiss you like I want to.... But if I let myself be selfish then you will miss out on thigns that matter to you and I'd hate myself for doing that.... Besides your herd and family are important to you, they need you, you can't leave them." Only knowing a little of Crown's role in the herd but understanding the basic idea of a protector.
Crown hated himself for having said those words out loud, even under his breath. Selfish, yeah that was certainly a word that described Crown too right now. The worst of it was, that not once, at least not to Crown's knowlegde, had he ever wanted to take something for himself... sure he had been stubborn about becoming a protector, had worked hard for that purpose... but Kyran... how did Kyran fit into all that? Strangely Crown found himself willing to give everything up to stand by the guy... but that would be moving too fast wouldn't it? The selfish part of him whispered, Why can't you keep it all? He frowned, it wasn't fair... Paris got to have all the mares that interested him, Eden got to have her mate with her... yet it seemed he was doomed to be like Drashi. Always apart. He didn't want that. He saw the sadness in his mentors eyes... "I don't want that." He said out loud, though if he had been paying attention he would have realised that it sounded more like a responce to not leaving his family, or not missing out.
He sighed and turned, his back to Kyran for a while as he looked at the forest.... well his eyes didn't actually see anything. Crown once again was forced to wonder if he and Kyran were doomed before they even started. "Forget about everything for a moment...." He said softly, "...forget my sister is expecting, forget that I am a protector in my herd... forget I even have a herd. What would you want then?"
Finding himself looing at his armour as he pondered that question, he had left his family but he knew he could go back, his father would eventually come round, and if not he would see his mother. But while he missed them he didn't feel the pain of it in the same way... The thought of leavign Crown behind hurt in a wholly different more painful way.... He had wings to fly, he could always visit his family, staying here for him was no real sacrifice, besides he had other family down here.... Admitedly some of them were psycho but family all the same. "If I forget all of that... forget everything but what I want.... I'd want to stay here with you, I'd want ot be by your side and in your heart. I'd want to watch you shine as you achieve your dreams and goals... I'd do anything for that..." After all he wasn't living his dream, he had never thought to have a dream of his own, he had teken up the path of his father becuse it was expected of him. Maybe... just maybe... now he could have his own dream too?.... But what?
Crown listened to Kyran's words, and the moment the guy finished he turned towards him. Hearing those words gave Crown the confidence to do what he was about to do, after all, he wasn't willing to lose something before it even happened.... wasn't willing to allow distance to appear in something that was already so fragile, just look at what happened when they both started thinking alone... it wasn't good. "Then let me stay by your side... let's go somewhere... anywhere... travel.... find ourselves." He laughed at himself, he knew he was sounding crazy, putting his heart out on the line and prepared for the stomp that might follow. "My family will be here if we ever decide to return. My sister will understand, it's not like we can't come back and visit....." He looked up into Kyran's eyes then, his golden ones shining with seriousness. "I want to be selfish too."
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Posted: Tue Aug 21, 2012 2:40 am
Kyran met Crowns eyes, something hopeful lighting them. He had often wished as a foal that his eyes had been like his fathers, but his were darker, not the blight purple they could have been. "To see the world... Just the two of us..." The idea was so tempting but he still found himself hesitating. Would Crown regret seeing his sisters foals born? He would likely never have any of his own to have the experience. What if his family needed him, the herd had not seemed happy lately, the feeling around them was different from when he had first come here. But he knew that Crown would regret some things if he just left without stopping to think. "If we do this.... Theres no turning back, its not like we could come back in a hurry if there was an emergency... Perhaps you sould talk to your herd leaders about your wish to travel? I and the world aren't going anywhere without you." Smiling gently.
Again Crown took Kyran's words in the worst possible way, as if the guy was trying to deflect and put it all on Crown's shoulders... even as he recognised that he was the one with the most ties right now. His reasonable brain simply wasn't speaking reason right now. "I have been thinking about it... for a while actually," Along with other things, many other things... like did he have feelings and all that. "My family will support me no matter I picked... it's not as if there is anything here for, not really.... sure, there is my mother and sister, and soon her kids... but... that isn't mine."
Kyran nodded and smiled softly. "I just wanted us going into this with clear heads, I don't want you to regret me." The thought terrified him, that one day Crown would look at him accusingly because time with him had cost Crown something that could not be replaced.
"Regret you?" He asked with a frown. Moving closer to the guy and nuzzling his neck softly before put his nose pressed against Kyrans. "I will regret it more if I don't try." He said softly, he really wanted to give the guy a kiss but couldn't bring himself to right now... as if doing so would shatter what they had just built up. Which was silly, right? After all... couples kissed. They were a couple right? GAH! Once again he was questioning everything, he really needed to stop doing that.
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Posted: Tue Aug 21, 2012 2:41 am
Kyran didn't have those kind of thoughts at the moment, Crowns last words had stabbed him right in the heart, and so he reacted. Kissing Crown softly, always careful as they both had fangs but a wealth of feelings in the kiss.
Crown melted into the kiss, not retreating at all, especially since he had been wanting to do that too. Once done he pulled back a little, a love sick expression upon his face. "You'll just have to take responsibility you know..." He chuckled softly, "...for stealing my heart." Part of him couldn't believe that he was saying that, yet in that moment he felt 'safe', and he didn't want to regret anything with Kyran, didn't want to feel as if he hadn't given it his best shot.
He sighed a little, worry settling in. "I don't want you to... hate me." He admitted softly. Crown had no idea how he would survive seeing hatred in the eyes of the one he had fallen for.
Kyran bit back the teasing reponce he had to that, Crown seemed to make a habit of seeing the worst in what he said and so being sarcastic would probably be a thing of doom. So instead he smiled and went to tug his mane in repremand for saying soemthing so dumb... Like he could ever hate him... Only to stop and look at Crown critically... "What happened to your hair?" Noting how.... fluffy... it was, he was used to it being a little fluffy, though mostly spiky... but this.... Well this was different...
Crown blushed. Oh! He had completely forgetten about his hair, hadn't even bothered to go for a bath in the lake before wandering to find Kyran. "Eh.... my mother?" He said, taking a deep breath before trying to look up at it critically. He could only see the front of it, but yeah it looked worst than it normally did... "She likes to fuss, and well, I wanted to be fussed over so I let her." He admitted, he had also wanted to talk to her about things but never got to due to Eden turning up with her good news, there was no way he was going to take the spotlight off her. Children needed to be treasured, his issues would still be there. Yet now, stood with Kyran, things looked a little brighter.
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Posted: Tue Aug 21, 2012 2:43 am
Kyran chuckled softly. "Should I be glad I lack much hair? Then again I'm a fluff monster... maybe I'm doomed." He shrugged and smiled. "I wil lsay though that at some point I'd like to meet your family, they sound interesting." Moving round and giving Crown a nudge on the rump towards the water so he could tame his hair.
"Sure... just say when and you can meet them." After all, he was going to have to tell the truth soon anyways, he wasn't going to lie when he explained why he was leaving... it felt like an insult to Kyran to say he was simply trying to 'find himself', sure that was part of it but in the grand scheme of things that was only a small sliver of it. He jumped a little as Kyran nudged his rump, looking over his shoulder at the stallion he couldn't help but grin, "You hate fluffiness that much? Or just on me?" He teased slightly, he wasn't as 'good' at it as Kyran, hadn't had as much experience either. If anything he had grown up too quickly. He had pushed himself for his goal and didn't let go... but had his goal become a distraction from the true feelings he had? That would explain so much. "Fine fine." He accepted, starting towards the river, still he found himself saying. "Still, I rather like a fluff monster so don't go insulting them." He winked before looking at himself in the water, properly looking... ok... yeah, he looked foolish. Thanks Mum! There was only one way to solve it, he took a deep breath before dunking his whole head in the water, after a moment he lifted up and took a breath before shaking his head vigoriously so that it sent a spray of waterdroplets all around him. It needed to dry but still he turned to see what Kyran thought now. "Better?"
"Then you would love my father, he is even more fluffy than me." Smiling as he watches Crown clean up, chuckling a little when he emerges from the water with no fluff, his hair mostly flattened by the water. "You look great with fluff... its just your hair is quite long so.... Yeah... its a different look thats for sure." Truth was he liked Crown's mane, fluff or not, but he also knew that Crown was selfconcious. "Well we should meet them before we leave." Changing topics all over the place, flopping down on a patch of clover.
At the mention of Kyran's father Crown paused, and looked at the guy, "You do realise I meant you not your father, right? I doubt I will care about anyone else's fluffiness." In fact, since meeting Kyran, Crown hadn't even looked at anyone else with much interest at all, not that he had done much before... but his eyes and heart only seemed to open up for Kyran, no subsititute would do. "As for my family... well, you have already met my sister briefly, but I will be sure to introduce you to her properly and my Mother... not sure about my brother or father since they aren't home right now, and you might have to endure the rest of the herd too... especially when I... well, when I tell them the truthe... I imagine lots of them will be curious." Crown was still nervous about facing them all and telling them, maybe he should just tell his Mum for now and worry about the rest later? Though in many ways, the fact that he would be leaving with the guy did seem to make it easier in a way, after all he wouldn't have to face them every day afterwards and the knowlegde would have become old news by the time he returned....
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Posted: Tue Aug 21, 2012 2:44 am
Nodding and smiling gently, he had known who Crown had meant, he had just tossed that out there as a tease. "Whatever you decide to tell, whoever you tell, I'll be right beside you when yo do it.... Unless you really don't want me to be and manage to convince me of it." Shrugging and smiling more. "But that might be rather hard to do."
"You want to come with me?" It hadn't occured to him that Kyran would want to be there when he told everyone, in fact part of the reason he had been so scared about it all was the fact he was planning to tell them all about his nature and self on his own. But with Kyran.... would he want that? Should he accept that? Or would it best to at least start off the conversation on his own first before inviting them to meet the guy who had swept him off his hooves?
He thought about it for a moment longer and then said honestly, "I hadn't actually thought that you might want to come and tell them with me... I sort of had this image of them all surrounding me while I tried to tell them about myself." Yeah, a group that circled and moved closer and closer... nightmare! He shook his head, knowing it was just his imagination going into over drive and beyond. "You might have to let my Mum fuss over you a little...." He said, almost as an after thought, "...she always wanted lots of girls, and only got one. Who... well, isn't very girly."
Ok so he couldn't stop himself. "I always thought my girlyness was my best quality." Batting his eyes at Crown and doing his best to give him a cute simpering girly look of adoration.
Crown blinked in surprise at the guy, ok, he hadn't expected that reaction which had him laughing, "Guess I'm going to be the man in our relationship then." Winks playfully at the guy.
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Posted: Tue Aug 21, 2012 2:45 am
Kyran poked his tongue out at Crown. "I dunno, you were jsut letting your mum play with your hair, next it will be those frilly bow things your sister has and heaven knows what next.... I think it best that I wear the shoes in this relationship." His tone playful, but changing the subject to get them back on track. "I'll be with you if you want me to be, I want to be with you... Besides I can put up with being fussed over if thats her inclination..." Wondering if his mother would be upset when she realised she might not have as many granschildren as she might have first thought.
"Ha!" He said with a roll of his eyes, "You just admitted to being girly... joke or not, I think I might just hold you to that for the rest of your life. Plus, you need far more grooming than me." He laughed, not all seeing Kyran in the light of a mare at all. His body was too different, larger muscles, larger build... there wasn't anything about him that Crown would particularly class as 'girly' or marelike. No, Kyran was simply Kyran.
"You say that now... but did you just see my hair?" He smiled softly, not at all bothered that his Mum had fussed over him... though yeah, it had been embarassing being caught like that. "She will play with you until you tell her to stop, which, given how polite you are is likely to be never. Might actually get jealous." He joked, though it was a half truth. Crown imaged he would both love and hate his family interacting with Kyran.
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