|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Fri May 18, 2012 12:28 pm
I had a bit of a discussion on religion with my mom, I've already told her I don't believe in god, that I'm an atheist. But this conversation, she suddenly said, "You're not really an atheist, you're just a non-practicing Catholic. You've been baptized, you're good."
All I can think of is 'What? How does THAT work?'
Seriously. What does it take to be considered an 'Atheist' if you've been baptized? I think the Bible is a bunch of cute stories made up by a few guys over the course of a few years, I hold only a few of the values, and I hardly practice the traditions. I have gotten no communions either.
But here's the weird part: I never CHOSE to be Catholic. I was maybe a few weeks old when I was baptized. All I knew was that my parents were handing me over to some guy dressed in funny clothing, dipping me in water. Nor did I CHOOSE to have a circumcision! I got that when I was maybe 3 days old. At what point am I a catholic if you did all this to me when I never had the CHOICE to follow in the first place?
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri May 18, 2012 1:33 pm
Kusugari I had a bit of a discussion on religion with my mom, I've already told her I don't believe in god, that I'm an atheist. But this conversation, she suddenly said, "You're not really an atheist, you're just a non-practicing Catholic. You've been baptized, you're good." All I can think of is 'What? How does THAT work?' Seriously. What does it take to be considered an 'Atheist' if you've been baptized? I think the Bible is a bunch of cute stories made up by a few guys over the course of a few years, I hold only a few of the values, and I hardly practice the traditions. I have gotten no communions either. But here's the weird part: I never CHOSE to be Catholic. I was maybe a few weeks old when I was baptized. All I knew was that my parents were handing me over to some guy dressed in funny clothing, dipping me in water. Nor did I CHOOSE to have a circumcision! I got that when I was maybe 3 days old. At what point am I a catholic if you did all this to me when I never had the CHOICE to follow in the first place? * sighs * Your mother thinks that you are damned, or even worse, evil, considering that "you're good"-addition to her comment, if you deny god, that is, if you are an atheist. You define yourself as an Atheist, then you ARE an atheist as i see it. As far as i see it, God exist(it may be questionable, though ... ), but i don't care if you do the same or not. As i see it, the thing that is important is doing good. Baptism, circumsicion, they may be proof of of a personal view, but they do not have to be. However, if you try to tell that to your mother, she might think you're even worse off than she thought before .... I have no real advice on how to handle parents that has views like that .... Just the info i already told you. I might be wrong, but this is the impression i have gotten from what you wrote.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri May 18, 2012 1:40 pm
Your mom sounds a bit like my mom. I'm pagan, but was brought up by a Christian family. She is thoroughly convinced that I'm just a not quite devout Christian, but because she takes me to church and pressured me into being baptized once - I'm part of the Christian church body forever and ever.
Honestly I think that your mom and mom are both a bit in denial about their children's belief's. For my mom I think it's because she's one of those fire and brimstone kind of Christians that like to remind people about the fires of hell that the non-believers get tossed into. She's a bit nutty sometimes, but she does love me, so I think she's grasping at straws trying to rationalize in her mind how her daughter isn't buying a one way ticket to eternal suffering. I think she sleeps better at night if she just tells herself that I'm Christian. So, I boil my mother's "You are so totally Christian, Nani" conversations down into a really convoluted "I love you," and instead of being irritated, just sort of nod and say "I love you too."
You're mom might be thinking along the same lines. So just take a breather and realize that if you mama's anything like mine, she will never recognize that you swapped belief systems because she worries over your soul and her love for you can't allow her to picture you suffering for all eternity.
Anyhow. I hope something I said helps.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri May 18, 2012 7:16 pm
NaniNani073 Your mom sounds a bit like my mom. I'm pagan, but was brought up by a Christian family. She is thoroughly convinced that I'm just a not quite devout Christian, but because she takes me to church and pressured me into being baptized once - I'm part of the Christian church body forever and ever. Honestly I think that your mom and mom are both a bit in denial about their children's belief's. For my mom I think it's because she's one of those fire and brimstone kind of Christians that like to remind people about the fires of hell that the non-believers get tossed into. She's a bit nutty sometimes, but she does love me, so I think she's grasping at straws trying to rationalize in her mind how her daughter isn't buying a one way ticket to eternal suffering. I think she sleeps better at night if she just tells herself that I'm Christian. So, I boil my mother's "You are so totally Christian, Nani" conversations down into a really convoluted "I love you," and instead of being irritated, just sort of nod and say "I love you too." You're mom might be thinking along the same lines. So just take a breather and realize that if you mama's anything like mine, she will never recognize that you swapped belief systems because she worries over your soul and her love for you can't allow her to picture you suffering for all eternity. Anyhow. I hope something I said helps. Thanks for the insight, but I actually WAS baptized, though I never actually had the choice, I was a few weeks old and they just handed me over to the priest. How I am a 'christian' makes no sense because all the things that make me a 'christian' according to her were forced upon me and were not my decision. Imagine if someone baptized you in your sleep, and suddenly your mom said because you were baptized you were now a christian no matter what. You never made the decision to say yes, you never even understood or were really aware of what was happening. Are you automatically a christian? No, of course not, you don't accept the beliefs, you never willing did the practices.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri May 18, 2012 7:17 pm
Tiina Brown Kusugari I had a bit of a discussion on religion with my mom, I've already told her I don't believe in god, that I'm an atheist. But this conversation, she suddenly said, "You're not really an atheist, you're just a non-practicing Catholic. You've been baptized, you're good." All I can think of is 'What? How does THAT work?' Seriously. What does it take to be considered an 'Atheist' if you've been baptized? I think the Bible is a bunch of cute stories made up by a few guys over the course of a few years, I hold only a few of the values, and I hardly practice the traditions. I have gotten no communions either. But here's the weird part: I never CHOSE to be Catholic. I was maybe a few weeks old when I was baptized. All I knew was that my parents were handing me over to some guy dressed in funny clothing, dipping me in water. Nor did I CHOOSE to have a circumcision! I got that when I was maybe 3 days old. At what point am I a catholic if you did all this to me when I never had the CHOICE to follow in the first place? * sighs * Your mother thinks that you are damned, or even worse, evil, considering that "you're good"-addition to her comment, if you deny god, that is, if you are an atheist. You define yourself as an Atheist, then you ARE an atheist as i see it. As far as i see it, God exist(it may be questionable, though ... ), but i don't care if you do the same or not. As i see it, the thing that is important is doing good. Baptism, circumsicion, they may be proof of of a personal view, but they do not have to be. However, if you try to tell that to your mother, she might think you're even worse off than she thought before .... I have no real advice on how to handle parents that has views like that .... Just the info i already told you. I might be wrong, but this is the impression i have gotten from what you wrote. These 'personal views' were all done to me without my consent. I'm asking how having these things forced upon me, even with me not even sharing those beliefs, makes me a christian? How can I 'choose' to be baptized when I'm 3 weeks old?
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri May 18, 2012 7:28 pm
Kusugari NaniNani073 Your mom sounds a bit like my mom. I'm pagan, but was brought up by a Christian family. She is thoroughly convinced that I'm just a not quite devout Christian, but because she takes me to church and pressured me into being baptized once - I'm part of the Christian church body forever and ever. Honestly I think that your mom and mom are both a bit in denial about their children's belief's. For my mom I think it's because she's one of those fire and brimstone kind of Christians that like to remind people about the fires of hell that the non-believers get tossed into. She's a bit nutty sometimes, but she does love me, so I think she's grasping at straws trying to rationalize in her mind how her daughter isn't buying a one way ticket to eternal suffering. I think she sleeps better at night if she just tells herself that I'm Christian. So, I boil my mother's "You are so totally Christian, Nani" conversations down into a really convoluted "I love you," and instead of being irritated, just sort of nod and say "I love you too." You're mom might be thinking along the same lines. So just take a breather and realize that if you mama's anything like mine, she will never recognize that you swapped belief systems because she worries over your soul and her love for you can't allow her to picture you suffering for all eternity. Anyhow. I hope something I said helps. Thanks for the insight, but I actually WAS baptized, though I never actually had the choice, I was a few weeks old and they just handed me over to the priest. How I am a 'christian' makes no sense because all the things that make me a 'christian' according to her were forced upon me and were not my decision. Imagine if someone baptized you in your sleep, and suddenly your mom said because you were baptized you were now a christian no matter what. You never made the decision to say yes, you never even understood or were really aware of what was happening. Are you automatically a christian? No, of course not, you don't accept the beliefs, you never willing did the practices. Yeah I totally get where you're coming from there. And I am in no way trying to infer that your mother is right, I'm just saying that she's probably trying to rationalize in her own mind how you could be rejecting Christianity and still going to heaven. In her mind she's probably trying to do the whole motherly must protect the child from harm thing. No mom really wants to think about their child suffering - especially not suffering forever. And while I think the whole idea of hell is a bunch of crap, that's probably why she settled on that baptism because infant you didn't protest. Obviously you couldn't, but in my experience when people are worried and trying to rationalize it doesn't usually make a whole lot of sense. I would take what your mother says about your beliefs with a can of salt - a BIG can of salt. Obviously you're not Christian. And you know that. This is what's important. But I honestly do think she's just saying this stuff because she loves you.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri May 18, 2012 7:48 pm
Kusugari Tiina Brown * sighs * Your mother thinks that you are damned, or even worse, evil, considering that "you're good"-addition to her comment, if you deny god, that is, if you are an atheist. You define yourself as an Atheist, then you ARE an atheist as i see it. As far as i see it, God exist(it may be questionable, though ... ), but i don't care if you do the same or not. As i see it, the thing that is important is doing good. Baptism, circumsicion, they may be proof of of a personal view, but they do not have to be. However, if you try to tell that to your mother, she might think you're even worse off than she thought before .... I have no real advice on how to handle parents that has views like that .... Just the info i already told you. I might be wrong, but this is the impression i have gotten from what you wrote. These 'personal views' were all done to me without my consent. I'm asking how having these things forced upon me, even with me not even sharing those beliefs, makes me a christian? How can I 'choose' to be baptized when I'm 3 weeks old? To you they holds no validity at all, but to your mother, it is something she seem to cling to, because she possibly think you'll burn in hell if you truly are an atheist .... NaniNani073 says an important thing too, about why your mother say as she do. Don't get hooked on your mother's beliefs and reasoning, you know what you think and believe, so stick to that. .... NaniNani073 actually gave you the advice that i couldn't: look at those comments as a token that your mother loves you ... because i doubt she'll ever understand you ...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
