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She'd told herself she would be strong around him, that she wouldn't keep falling apart on him. She still felt emotionally raw, twitchy and tense and ready to jump at anything. She didn't want to make him deal with that.

No, she just wanted to see him, spend some time with him. She wasn't going to burst into tears again or anything.

It was when the ghoul realized that she had stood up to leave and then talked herself back out of it on three separate occasions that she decided that if she was going to go, she should just go. She certainly wasn't getting anything else done like this.

It didn't take her long to cross the Reaper dorms, and she paused as she approached Roch's door. When she realized she'd been standing there for several long moments, she pushed herself forward the last few feet... only to stumble on something and almost fall.

What was...? Why was there a wire strung across the hallway?

Frowning slightly, she carefully stepped up to the door. At least the surprise had broken her out of the self-defeating cycle of thoughts, and she knocked without any more hesitation.

She waited, and when she got no response, knocked again. Still nothing. As the anxiety started to return, she looked around. He must just be out, right? He had to be coming back before too long. She could wait for a while, see if he showed up.

Because if she left, she wasn't sure she'd get herself to come back.

She sat down next to the door, pulling her knees up to her chest and draping her arms around them. As her chin rested on her knees, she wondered how long it would be reasonable to hang out there. An hour? Maybe two?

As much as her position was not very comfortable, the ghoul was still exhausted. So it wasn't nearly that long before she dozed off, still curled up, waiting.

Mitzi couldn't say what it was that woke her up; she certainly didn't remember hearing anything. The first thing that she did remember was feeling stiff, and sore, and cold. And she couldn't for the life of her figure out where she was, as she blearily blinked at... was that the dorm hallway? What was she doing here?

She she rubbed the sleep out of her eyes, trying to remember what had happened, why she was curled up on the floor like this. She carefully started to push herself to her feet, using the wall to support herself as her stiff legs complained. She pulled out her eyephone to check the time... oh right, she'd stopped by Roch's room. And he hadn't been there, so she sat down to wait. That had been fairly late at night. When she finally saw the time, she just stared at it in confusion for a moment. That couldn't be right. That would mean... s**t!

Somehow she had, up till that moment, not noticed the boil staring at her from down the hall. So when she looked up, about to head back to her room, her heart skipped a beat, and she felt a wave of heat cross her face.

Her eyes dropped to the floor as a jumble of words tumbled through her mind, what she could say to explain why she was here. She felt them ready to spill out, and was just about to speak, even though she knew it would end badly...

She shut her mouth again quickly, then took a deep breath. No, she could handle this, but she had to do it calmly. She pulled her eyes up off the floor, a little of her normal confidence slipping into her stance, even if she didn't entirely feel it. "There you are! I came by last night, and when you weren't here I thought I'd wait a bit. I guess I was so tired still that I dozed off. So, how're you doing?" Once she started, it was surprisingly easy, and she managed a smile, even if it was a bit strained. But that could easily be explained by what they had just been through, no other reasons necessary.

"Ugh, no joke, I'm so stiff." She rolled her shoulders, trying to get some of the kinks out. At his comment about her clothes, she glanced down, and smoothed out the wrinkles in her shirt as best she could. "Probably not a bad idea."

As much as she kept her tone light and herself visibly at ease, her heart was still pounding. She frowned, not sure if it was just her own paranoia, or if there was something more. "Roch, are you sure everything's all right?" If he was returning to his room, why hadn't he come any closer? Maybe this was a mistake, she should just go back to her room, that seemed to be what he wanted... She shook her head, trying to get the murmurs in the back of her mind to be quiet for a moment.

Even if she did head back to her room, the shortest way was past him.

That bird. Somehow, everything had just happened too quickly, and she had never really made the connection. "So that's..." One had drifted up to brush the side of her head. "You're not the only one."

For a moment after he sat down, she stayed standing where she was, feeling slightly awkward and not sure what she should do. Then she sank to the floor herself, curling up like before and resting her chin on her arms. "Roch, if there's anything you need... You know I'm here for you, right?" He'd always been there for her, and it hurt to see him like this.

She wanted to slide across the hall, to slip an arm around his shoulders, but the same whispers that had almost kept her from coming down, that had told her he wanted her to leave... hell, they still said he wanted her to leave, but she wasn't about to do so now. Nor, however, could she get up the courage to go over to him, so instead she just watched the boil, wishing she knew how to help him.

As he kept talking, her worried frown deepened. She was just as glad she was already curled up, as her insides were twisting into knots.

"I don't... I just... I'm not so weak, that I always need you to pick me up and hold me together," she whispered, barely loud enough for him to hear. She'd been right to worry he thought that, apparently. Her voice grew a little louder as, after a brief pause, she continued, "You have always been there for me, and if you need a friend to lean on, I'm here for you." She sighed and shook her head. "That's all I want. Because seeing you like this... it's kind of scary. So if there's any way I can help - anything at all - then I want to."

She continued to frown, not really reassured, but if he said there was nothing she could do...

She jerked at his outburst, almost jumping to her feet as her heart took off racing. For a moment she did think he was talking to her, before he clarified. That sounded... "Do you mean voices, voices, or like... someone's talking in another room, and you can't quite make out what they're saying?" She couldn't decide if admitting it out loud made it better, or worse, or if he'd even realize what she was implying.

She wrapped her arms tightly around her legs. No, saying something was definitely worse, she was sure they were laughing at her now...

She sat there, trying to decide what to do... before scooting across the hall to sit next to him and, after a moment, wrap one arm around his shoulders. "I'm hearing 'em too..." It hurt to say it, but it hurt even more to know that's what he was fighting with.

As he spoke, she couldn't help but follow his train of thought. When he brushed her arm off, she shivered a bit as she curled back up again, her eyes drifting down to the floor. Was that what would happen to her, to him, to everyone else who was there?

"Can I just... sit with you for a bit longer?" Mitzi really couldn't say if it was because at that moment, she didn't want to be alone, or she didn't want him to be alone. Not with that thought hanging in the air.