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 Posted: Thu Mar 29, 2012 9:48 pm
 Urgh, had sunlight always been this obnoxiously bright? Sky was pretty sure that the sun was only being bright to spite him, and that thought alone told him more than he wanted to know about himself. It wasn't all that bright out, either--it was certainly mid-morning, early afternoon at the latest, but a misty fog had persisted through the night, leaving what sunlight there was silver and damp. It was much dimmer than the searing light of the noontime sun in the desert, but that wasn't the point, was it? It was that odd feeling of levity and anger that permeated him. Sky tried to ignore it.
He stumbled along a path strewn with pebbles and gravel, not so much shambling as walking with abnormally heavy footfalls. His wings tucked against his side, resting lightly against his armor, it slowly became apparent to Sky that there was something else there. A slight shape in the mist? Another living creature? It would know he was there just from his footsteps, slag them!
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Posted: Sat May 05, 2012 8:59 pm
 No sunlight, no matter how bright or faded, rarely touched the eyes of the white mare with the sorrow eyes. A black cloak, falling down past her hindquarters and knees, was draped across her back, neck, and the top of her head. She wasn't sure why she always choose to live in the shadows of the wool, but it felt right to do so. Not that it mattered to have her face shown to the world around her. Reika was just as lost, if not more broken, than she was. The amount of tattoos on her body showed the length of time she had spent in her own solitude like Kyouka. This created a bond between them, had made the older mare race down to the chamber to free her before death could claim them both. Death might have been better than this. Loneliness still spread across them like a silk kimono. They had each other, but it wasn't the preferred other. At least for Kyouka, she had hopes her beloved was still alive. For Reika, there was no hope. She had seen him die before her very eyes. Perhaps that bit of hope, coupled with the child she had spirited away long before the disaster, was what kept her on more sane levels than her companion.
Though not much more so.
The beautiful mare had lost the tattooed one in this fog and didn't feel like drawing attention to herself by calling out for Reika. Though the feeling of being lonely weighed on her more by each passing second, she kept silent, her face, if seen, a mask of serenity.
When the mist parted slightly ahead of her to reveal a figure, her first thought was of the other mare, so she slowly walked towards it without thinking or breaking an expression. But as she got closer, her senses slowly awoke to tell her this was a figure much too tall and the footsteps much too heavy. The outline was also strange, not the slender figure she was used to. In her half insane mind, only one name was whispered from between her lips.
"Akito..."
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Posted: Mon May 14, 2012 2:11 pm
A cloaked figure seemed to appear out of the mist like the barest shadow of death. The muscles in Sky's legs twitched, but he made no movement. His instincts to flee from the apparition were immediately and violently squelched by his own blood. He could not move. He would not move, even as the mare drew nearer. He could see now...blood? seeming to dribble from her eyes, despite the serenity of her face peering out from under the hood. He was entranced, unable to move a single muscle while she approached. Only the soft word that tumbled from her lips broke the spell.
For one half-mad moment, Sky found himself questioning himself. Who was he? Who was Akito, if Akito was indeed a name? No. I am Sky. He was certain of that. At least, he had thought he was. There might once have been something more... "No," he said simply. Other words he might have said did not come to mind. He wasn't even certain if the word he said was in denial of her address, his own doubts, or even of the vision in front of him.
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Posted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 8:26 pm
Kyouka checked herself, her eyes going wider and her head shifting away from the stallion who was emerging out of the fog. Like she, herself, had been in a fog and was only just returning to the real world by his appearance. From a daydream of something long ago.
The mare shook her head to rid herself of the memory. Memories were painful. Everything about that place was painful. How much everyone must be suffering, still, even now.
Her eyes narrowed, going back to their usual size. Kyouka's face was once again calm as she said softly, "I am sorry...My mistake." She made to go around him, her eyes submissively on the ground with a touch of their usual sadness. Reika. She must find Reika. With Reika came her only bit of comfort in this wide world.
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Posted: Mon Jul 30, 2012 9:10 pm
Mistakes...then the apparition, like himself, must be no apparition at all, but another star. She still seemed ethereal, as if this encounter were taking place on another world, far from the real one, far away from anything. She seemed...was she less real for being ethereal? Or more real? As if clumbering around like a sleepy oaf was a ludicrous affront to existence. He found himself stepping slowly, heavily towards her. She seemed so sad, so lost, so alone...He knew what that was like, to feel alone, to feel like there was no help anywhere. "Who is Akito? And where is Akito?" It didn't seem like an unreasonable thing to ask. Maybe she needed help finding this Akito. Whoever it was was probably nearby, though, for her to mistake him for the other. Whoever it was, it was probably someone important.
Sky shivered in the mist. It wasn't just the suspended droplets of water now, it was the feeling of melancholy all around, seeing this at once pale and dark figure in the mist. Who are you?
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Posted: Mon Oct 29, 2012 12:08 pm
Kyouka's mind was slowly repairing itself of the damage the mistake had caused it. In her mind, she knew she'd never see Akito, again. That one winter they had spent together so long ago was gone. Disappeared with the melting of the snow in Spring. In her mind, she knew he was dead. She just couldn't bring herself to accept it. Shutting it away in one lonely corner of her heart and swallowing the key.
It took the mare a while to realize the other had said anything. By then she had already passed him. The sound drifted inside the hood of her cloak, tugging on her ear until she turned her head around. The brown eyes underneath it looked at him, at the same time not seeming to see him at all.
Where was Akito indeed.
"I don't know," was all she could manage to say, meaning it for the second question. Not realizing it could apply to either or both. "Somewhere. Who are you?"
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Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2012 8:09 am
The mare passed by him like a forgotten memory of a ruined place. Something in what might once have been his heart ached in sympathy, as if it could sense some terrible sorrow in her that threatened to shred her into pieces...and felt that feeling itself. No more a simple star, no more a hazy apparition, she was both and neither, and Sky could almost feel something, he didn't know what, scream out in loss, in loneliness, as if the encounter had awoken something in him that he had forgotten.
But he couldn't remember what!
He couldn't bare to be alone, that he knew. Suddenly, isolation felt wrong, like a fundamental, sacrilegious violation of all that he was supposed to be. He took several large, swift steps to catch up with her until he was walking beside her, matching her pace with his own. "I don't know," he murmured. He was being honest. A name was not who he was--he was something more than a name, but the name was all he had. It was not enough.
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Posted: Mon Jan 21, 2013 9:25 am
Kyouka stopped in her tracks, turning her head towards him. The tone of his voice, it brought back memories. There was much loneliness in her family, in both the current and the past. Mostly her own. Spending most of her time in her rooms or the garden attached to them. Alone, save her handmaiden. The males her mother had brought to her in hopes of female heirs were company, but it was never the same. The ones who tried to talk to her were appreciated. Few, but appreciated. The only trouble was, after Akito, not even that was the same. Not even when they complimented her hair.
It wasn't as long as it was back then, nor as soft, shiny, or beautiful. It had turned stringy after years of neglect, with no one to tend to it. She needed to make some heirs to serve as handmaidens. To brush it and wash it. Males were the same no matter where she went. She could easily get her heirs. It was her duty as a Kuze mare to keep the family going. There was nothing else she knew.
Right now, heirs were far from her mind. This stallion sounded just as lost as she felt. Perhaps worse. It was a pity there was nothing she could give him. Companionship from a kindred spirit, but only until the sun set. Then she would have to leave. And what good would that do? He would be alone, again.
"You don't or won't? I wish I couldn't."
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Posted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 2:25 pm
Couldn't what? What couldn't the mare do? He couldn't make heads nor tails of her thoughts--or his own, for that matter. Won't? What did she mean by won't? Nothing made sense. Not her words, not his loneliness, not purple sparks and trickling loss like rain or obscuring mist. All of his emotional and mental turmoil over the past several months, all of the aching feelings of something being wrong, or missing, or disconnected from him in some way, was too much to bear. He needed to be near someone. Needed to know that he wasn't alone, that he wasn't wandering in some parallel dimension, unable to touch, unable to feel, unable to be heard. That wasn't natural. But the mare...the mare could see him. She could sense him. That meant he was still...not alive. No, he was positive he wasn't alive. He didn't know what alive felt like, but this was not what he would imagine living would be like.
He was definitely dead. Maybe she was too? He was just so confused, and frustrated, and he needed...needed someone nearby, someone to see and interact with so that he could remember that he was still...in the world.
"I don't know," he repeated. "Who I am...Or was. And I don't think I'll ever know." He pulled his wings in close against his body, the tattered ends shivering against the cold metal. "How can I know?"
((I think this is easily the most surreal RP I've ever done.))
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Posted: Sat Feb 02, 2013 7:20 pm
Kyouka stared out from under her cloak with her own lost eyes. Her own eyes full of sorrow. The red on her face that was her strange markings after the unleashing of the evil under the Kuze shrine glowed out from under the hood of her cloak against the ghostly white of her skin. Maybe that was why she hid. The markings were like proof of her curse to those who looked on her. The blood under her eyes and the carved heart on her chest a testimony of her sorrow.
The Abyss could be cruel when it wasn't appeased.
He was asking much of her. Too much, perhaps. She was just a broodmare for the Kuze's, not a spiritual Star to be answering questions like that.
She kept as much to herself, though. Outside her home, such occupations were not always met with kindness.
"Never is a long time. Don't rule anything out."
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Posted: Wed Mar 20, 2013 3:53 pm
He shook his head. "'Never' is not a time. Never is a statement of existence, like 'is' or 'was.' 'Now' is a time. 'Forever' is a time. And I'll forever never know."
Forever...he felt like he had the weight of forever on his body, in his bones, boiling in his veins. She's right. There is no order. Only chaos. All things change. But it wasn't a comforting thought. No, not at all. In fact, it made him crave contact all the more. There was something sinister about chaos. The loss of meaning? The lack of purpose? Or maybe it was the way his blood raced at the very idea of chaos, as if it was excited, as if he was excited. And he didn't like that feeling, that feeling that something sinister and unknowable was manipulating him, using him as a means to its own end. It was as if he was a tool for his own blood, blazing, burning, making his eyes glow even brighter and the purple ooze in his arteries glowed from inside his body, through his charred skin. No. I can't think about this!
Instead, he tried to concentrate on his companion. She seemed to be dripping blood from her eyes underneath her heavy cloak. Somehow the sight of crimson blood oozing from an orifice over pure, white skin was...comforting. Oh, so comforting to see blood, to see real blood! Had he had blood like this before? It was almost enchanting on her.
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Posted: Sun Oct 06, 2013 7:48 pm
Kyouka stood silently, absorbing the words but not really understanding them. She wasn't sure what it had to do with anything. Like he was correcting her. This confused her. Or did it make him feel better to say it this way? She couldn't tell and was in no state herself to judge.
The only thing that remained clear was this stranger was, for the moment, making her forget her own misery. Not because he was showing her others could have it worse-at least she knew who she was-but because it played on her sympathies. For the moment she was normal and in control, leaving her time to empathize.
The faint ghost of a smile played on her lips. The mare stepped forward, raising her nose towards the tall stallion until she was able to gently nuzzle his cheek. He reminded her of a lost child. She had been raised to be a mother. He was playing on her instincts to comfort and protect.
"Memories do not vanish." Kyouka stepped back, placing one leg behind the other so the cloak snapped closed against her paleness. "They just hide until the time is right to remember."
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Posted: Wed Nov 06, 2013 9:43 pm
Contact, living contact. It had been too long since last Sky had touched another--longer, possibly, than he knew, with the blank in his memory before waking wandering. The mare smiled, and she nuzzled him, softly, gently, as a mother with a child. His eyes closed and his blood slowed to a calmed buzz in his veins. She was soothing. He did not know who she was, even now, but he felt lonelier now than he'd ever thought could be possible.
She was lonely, too--who she was lonely for, this Akito, he did not know. Whom he was lonely for, even more of a mystery. But he felt a pain in his chest like half his heart had been ripped out, and the bottom seemed to drop out of the world even as she stepped back from him and the cloak fell around her pale form like the moon setting without dawn. And yet she did not leave him with nothing.
"Memories," he repeated. Perhaps...she was right. Perhaps the memories of who he was would be found again. A passing face, a familiar place, a smell from childhood or a sound or a song--reunion of the present with the past. "Thank you," he whispered, and he meant it with all of his being.
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