Hello! Here's a few fanfics I've written.
Anders x Mage
Sweet innocence had still been settled upon me the first time we met,
He was charming,
I was clueless to the word around me and new to the strange tower,
His hands were always so warm when he would take mine in them and he would make magic dance from his hands and up across mine, butterflies would flap their wings just a moment before they would vanish from sight,
A secret between him and me.
And then, the innocence started to escape me and I grew into my teenage years,
And our bond faded apart,
The feeling of admiration I once had for him shifted into something much deeper,
I would lay awake, just wondering where he was, wondering why he always tried to get away,
The Templars were annoying, but not horrible (to me at least).
And when I would see him my heart would race and I would try to follow, only for my heart to be shattered, he was a man.
I was still a child in his eyes; he needed someone to doing things with, things he wouldn’t even consider me for.
Each time I caught him in an embrace with someone, I would run, all I could do was run back to my room and sob into my pillow.
And then the day came, I was supposed to become a mage that day and he came to me.
He said his good bye, and I cried and begged the rebel mage I loved so dear to stay or take me with him, he refused; he didn’t want me in harm’s way with the Blight going.
I walked slowly down the hall and when I finally stepped foot into the fade, the darkness over crept me and I cried and cried, screaming his name into the dream world as if he could hear me.
A demon came, demons came, and they laughed and mocked at me.
I could feel myself running out of time, the tip of a blade against my body’s neck and all I could do was scream out his name with my last and final breath.
Images of my rebel mage passed through my head, my sweet free, Anders.
Fenders!
I watched him with jealousy burning in the back of my head, my heartfelt heavy; this man had helped me many times, but I still couldn't help but hate him as of late. He had someone I wanted, someone I couldn't help but want no matter how much we bickered and fought with each other. I turned away from them just as Hawke leaned down to give the elf a kiss on the cheek, I knew the other would swat him away, but I wished I could be the one leaning down to press my lips against his tanned cheek.
"Is something wrong, Anders?" Came a light voice beside me, I glanced to Merrill, "You look rather upset." She frowned and set a light, comforting hand against the feathers on my robes.
I shrugged her hand away from me, "I'm fine," I said before I started walking, "We have a mission to do, we're supposed to be dealing with these raiders for Aveline, not messing around." My eyes flicked to Hawke and Fenris, the elf, to my surprise was looking at me as well.
"The mage is right," He said, the other two also looked surprised at him agreeing with me, "The guard captain asked us to do this, so we should." He shoved Hawke away and took the lead, walking in front of the rest of us.
I hurried after him; I wanted to be near him again, even if it angered Justice. He said he was a distraction, and my feelings for him would just get me in trouble with Hawke, but I cared not, I wanted to be with the elf, with my rival.
"Do you think Anders is acting funny?" I heard Merrill try to whisper to Hawke behind me, she was always worrying about everyone.
"Do you think Fenris is acting funny?" He asked her, ignoring her question about me, he was quite upset at me still for taking care of Fenris a few weeks before . . . and he didn't even know about all that had happened. . .
<><><><>
It was a dark stormy night, I remember standing inside the Hanged Man waiting for the rain to stop, Isabella's laugh made me turn from the door and I blinked at the sight.
Fenris was completely wasted, and starting to pull his clothes off.
"Oh Maker, really?" I sighed, trying not to give away that I almost wished the elf would strip right there, "Should one of us go get Hawke?"
"Why? So he can get pissed off?" Isabella laughed, before she sighed, being serious for once, "Hawke cares about Fenris, but this would just piss the bugger off, why don't you take Fen home? I can't carry him, but you could."
I glanced to the elf, who had already removed his belt and gauntlets and was going for his boots before I nodded, "I suppose, just because Hawke would be upset to hear of this." I frowned and walked over to the drunken elf.
"It'll be our secret." Isabella promised before she managed to get Fenris to start putting his removed clothing accessories back on.
I nodded before I looked to Fenris, frowning, "Come on you wild dog," I said, "We're going to get you home now," I put a loose arm around his waist, not sure if he would lash out at me or not, if he had been sober, he would have removed my arm from the rest of my body.
His green eyes went to me and he smiled! He smiled at me! "Okay, mage," He said, and wrapped his arms around my neck, tugging me down a bit, "When we get there . . .you can, you can stay with me." He snickered and then nuzzled against the feathers on my robe.
My heart paused in my chest before I carefully leaned down enough to hook my arms under his legs and pulled him up, holding him bridal style in my arms. Before I left, I looked to Isabella, "I'm serious, you better not say a word to Hawke." I told her as she laughed at the sight of us.
I had a bad feeling that she would mention it to Hawke anyway, most-likely when they were in bed together, I had sworn not to breathe a word of it to Fenris when I had caught them together.
I carried Fenris through the rain all the way to his mansion; the storm had thankfully died down and was just a soft rain, but still enough to soak us both.
Once we arrived, I set him down on his feet in the front room and sighed, "Here we are," I told him, "Do you think you could manage to drunkenly get dried off and upstairs?"
The elf glanced around a moment before he turned back to me, his green eyes focusing on my face before he stumbled forward and reached out to touch one of the feathers on my robe, "Your wet, mage," He commented, before he looked down at my soaked robe, and then back to my face, "I hate you, mage."
I sighed and swatted his hand away from me, "I know that," I told him, before I stepped away from him and turned back to the door, "I can go get Hawke if you need him." I said, reaching out to grab the door knob.
"I do not want Hawke," Fenris said and snorted, "I caught him with that pirate WHORE Isabella! And he DENYED it, can you believe that mage? I saw her in his BED; the b*****d was cheating on me!" He roared before he stumbled backwards and landed on his butt on the floor, "I tried to forget everything that a mage has done to me and he turned around and showed me how UNTRUST-WORTHY they could be."
A lump had formed in my throat and I turned back to the broken warrior on the floor, I sighed before I moved over to him and leaned down beside him, "I am sorry, Fenris," I told him, "I wish you could see. . ." I reached out and brushed my finger tips against one of the lyrium marking on his neck, they felt warm to my touch, "I wish you could see that not all mages are that way, some can love, and some can be trusted. Not all of us are monsters."
His eyes went to me, they were so full of sorrow, "I hate you, mage," He told me, before he reached out and brushed a strain of my wet hair out of my face, "I hate you more than them all, I hate you, I hate you because I love you." He leaned forward and I pulled back.
"Y-you what?" I yelped before I quickly stood up, my heart racing against my chest, hearing the words I had wanted to hear from his lips for years, "You’re just drunk, you don't know what you’re talking about. I should go." I quickly turned away from him.
"Don't you dare leave me, mage," Fenris said, managing to get his drunken-a** off the floor, grabbing my wrist from behind before he spun me around, "I. . .it's true, I hate you. I hate you only because I love you."
I tried to pull my wrist away but even drunk he was stronger than me, "What about Hawke?" I asked, knowing I could not pull myself away from him much longer.
"I told you, I do not want Hawke," He repeated, and he almost didn't seem drunk, until he stumbled closer against me that is, "I want you, mage."
With those words ringing in my ears, I found myself shoving Fenris up against the wall that had once been behind me, “I have been waiting to hear those words from you.” I whispered to him, “Oh, Fenri—” I was cut off by his lips slamming against my own; I gasped and blinked before I kissed him back. His hands pressed against the back of my neck and pulled me closer against him.
His tongue flicked out and ran against my lower lip as my hands pressed against his clothed hips, and I parted my lips, brushing our tongues together. I slid my hands up his shirt before I broke the kiss long enough for him to remove it from himself, and I ran my hands along the lyrium tattoos on his flesh that had started to glow a soft blue.
“Beautiful,” I murmured, before I moved my lips to his neck and kissed one of the tattoo’s, it left a spark against my lips and I nearly moaned in pleasure, he pulled me closer against him, and just as I was about to move my lips back to his, a pounding knock came to his door.
I jumped back away from him and quickly tossed his shirt at him as I heard Hawke’s voice through the other side of the door, “Fenris?” He sounded angry; I heard the familiar sound of Isabella’s giggle and cursed in my head.
Fenris drunkenly pulled his shirt back on, reaching out to smack my a** as I yelped quietly and jumped, looking back to him as he gave me a grin.
“Hawke is at your door,” I whispered to him, he didn’t seem to care and just stumbled closer to me, I cursed once more in my head, looking to the door. I leaned down and swiftly placed one last kiss against the elf’s lips before I stepped away from him and opened the door.
Hawke’s brown eyes narrowed on me, “Anders?” He asked, “What are you doing here?”
I hoped he couldn’t tell I was slightly hard, at least, I hoped he wasn’t looking that direction anyway, “I brought Fenris home from the Hanged Man,” My eyes flicked to Isabella, “She should have been able to tell you that much. He was completely drunk and it was her idea to have me bring him home.”
Hawke still didn’t look pleased and just shoved around me, “Get out of here, Anders.” He said, a bit of a snarl to his tone.
I frowned but nodded before I started to leave.
“This is my house!” Fenris said, “I never said he had to leave, if anyone is to leave it’s THAT WHORE standing in my doorway!”
“Fenris, I’ll just go.” I said, hoping I didn’t sound too upset about leaving before I turned away from them and walked out of the door. . .
<><><><>
I shook that night out of my head the best I could, I couldn’t be distracted during a battle, or in a Hawke hating mode. If I hated Hawke during a battle, I probably wouldn’t heal him, and he had no healing abilities of his own, only the damn blood magic he had been hiding from Fenris this whole time.
I curled my nose at the thought and snorted to myself, causing Fenris to glance back at me. He frowned before he slowed his steps so I was walking beside him; my heart was racing softly against my chest. “I can’t stop thinking about that night,” He whispered to me, looking ahead of us, “When I woke up, I could still remember all of it.”
My cheeks flushed and I glanced back to Merrill and Hawke, they were too busy whispering too each other to pay attention to us, I half wondered if he was sleeping with her too. I then turned my attention back to Fenris, “I can’t stop thinking about it either.” I whispered to him, “Did you mean it?”
His green eyes flicked to me and he stopped walking, “I meant every word I said,” He told me, “I might have been drunk, but I could never lie to you, mage.”
My heart quickened against my chest and I stopped walking as well, “What about Hawke?” I asked him, at this point, I didn’t care if the other two mage’s heard me. I wanted to know the truth.
Fenris watched me a few moments before he walked closer to me, “I told you, I do not want Hawke.” He said, before he leaned down and pressed our lips together in one swift motion.
F!Warden x Zevran (Alistair?) - not finished
Alistair had told me over and over again that he never wanted to become king, but when it came down to the throne or me . . . He chose Fereldan, he asked me to be his queen, but I knew, no one would be pleased if there was an elf up that high in the world, so I broken heartily refused him. He told me that his offer would always stand, at any time I could come to him and tell him I was ready to be his queen and he would take me without any questions. Soon after he told me this, I left him, going off to find more Grey Wardens to protect Fereldan from any future Blights, with Zervran by my side the whole time.
Finding recruits had been easier than I thought it would have been a lot of people where more than happy to throw their lives away to protect everyone else after seeing the danger of the Blight, which I had stopped. I kept close to Grey Warden camps, only venturing far enough to check Chanter’s Boards and other small villages to make sure there was peace, each place I went, Zevran followed, even after I told him his duties were over. The more we traveled the more and more I let myself open up to him until I took his offer to once again return to his tent, for a brief while we had, had something between us while I was with Alistair but that had been short lived.
I had vowed to never return to Denirum unless I really had to, and one day when I was traveling, Sten found Zervran and me, he asked us to take him to Denirum, he had important business with Alistair about the well being of a group of his people in Kirkwall, he said it was urgent and could stop a war, without little choice I decided that we would take him, and that’s where the story unfolds.
“I can take him to Denirum,” Zevran told me, as I glanced back at him from where I stood, “I have heard something’s that may or may have not happened inside that palace over the years. . . I don’t want you getting hurt if we go back.”
I gave him a weak smile, “A few rumors aren’t about to stop me from helping Sten and the Qunari, they need our help, so I’m going to help them.” I told him, hating my need to help people.
He watched me a moment, his brown eyes watching me before he slowly nodded, he then walked up to me and put a light hand under my chin, tilting it up to look at me, “Alright, then I shall stand by you,” He told me, I could feel his hot breath against my face, he then leaned down and left a kiss against my lips.
Sten cleared his throat loudly, “We should get moving,” He said, sounding rather grumpy, “We’re wasting day light.”
“Work, work, no play!” Zevran said with a sigh before he laughed and shook his head, “Let’s go then.”
I rolled my eyes at the two of them before I started walking once more, leading the two men towards Denirum and out of the comfort of camp.
Camp wasn’t too far from Denirum, and the trip was uneventful, so it only took us a few days to get there, but long enough to have me wishing that the Griffens wouldn’t have gone extinct so Grey Wardens could still ride them around, my poor feet would have liked that a lot more than walking.
I sighed when we got through all the gates outside of the palace and were lead to the dining room by a servant elf to wait for Alistair there. I frowned each time I saw an elf, it made me want to break down and cry, to see even after Alistair had took over the castle and his romance history with me, that elves were still used as servants and slaves all over the place.
I played with my ears, rubbing my thumb against the point of my left one as I glanced around until Zevran noticed and stopped me,
holding my hand a moment, “Calm down.” He whispered into my ear, before he let go of my hand, giving me a gentle smile.
It seemed to take a few hours for him to get there, it felt so strange, standing there waiting for the man I still loved after all my long nights with the handsome Antivan elf that was standing by me, I knew Zevran knew that I still loved Alistair, I think sometimes he even was hurt over the fact, but he never let me know when it bothered him.
As we stood there, many people passed through, before there was finally the sound of a throat being cleared from behind us. Zevran passed me a look, before I slowly turned around. He looked almost the same way I had always remembered him, his dirty blond hair and dark brown eyes, and charming face, I could almost hear my heart cry at the sight of him, when I got enough of my senses back, I realized that he too was staring at me, admiration in his eyes. From the corner of my eye, I saw Zevran frown.
We all stood there a few moments before Sten finally spoke and broke the unsteady silence, “The Qun are in need of your help,” He told Alistair, who looked to him, “May we speak somewhere a bit more private?”
Alistair nodded, “Of course,” He finally spoke, my heart beating just a bit quicker, before his eyes went to me, “I hope you’ll stay,” He told me, quietly, “So we can all catch up.” He then glanced to Zevran before he turned his attention back to Sten, “Come this way.” He told him, before leading him out of the room.
With those words said, they both walked out of the room and left Zevran and me standing there alone.
Zevran sighed loudly and looked to me a moment before he stepped to my side and grabbed my hand tightly; I could tell if it was to comfort me or to show anyone who walked in I belonged to him.
I glanced at him a few moments before I turned to him and set one of my hands against his chest, running my fingers along his leather armor before I pressed up against him and kissed him deeply on the lips, so he’d get the point he wasn’t losing me.
He kissed me back without hesitation, wrapping his arms around my waist as he pulled me closer up against him. His lips were almost forceful against mine, something I wasn’t used to.
I shoved him back just a bit and he frowned before I softly stroked his cheek, “Zev,” I said softly as I watched him, “Stop. You know you have nothing to worry about.”
“I can’t help it,” The Antivan elf I had learned to love replied, “I can remember the way you used to look at each other in camp, the smile you had when he would steal a kiss from you, you had something different with him, what you do not with me.”
Hesitantly, I reached out and softly set my hand against his cheek, “Zevran,” I said, softly, “I love you. You’ve always been here for me.”
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