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 Posted: Mon Mar 05, 2012 1:39 pm
His talk with Vesta had helped him make up his mind, and with it made up he set off in search of his sister, Azar. A million and one thoughts and ideas ran through his mind as he moved across the sands with purpose. He held his head high and seemed to know exactly where he was headed, though his bright blue eyes appeared clouded and dazed. This was a difficult time and a difficult matter that he needed to discuss with his fellow brigadier.
"Azar!" He called out, his voice loud and clear. "I need to talk with you," he continued coming to a slow halt. His eyes seemed clearer, no longer clouded by distraction or thought. His head thudded in his chest, the sound nearly deafening to his ears, as he awaited her appearance or response.
The matter at hand was a fragile topic, one that could go either way and he knew he had to tread carefully along the lines of what he would say. He had never been one to be so keenly aware of another's emotions, he himself was a creature who was emotionally detached in most matters, but this was a special occasion.
One that filled him with sadness and undoubtedly filled his sister with grief.
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Posted: Sun Mar 11, 2012 6:10 pm
Azar had been in her den, and had been the last few days since the meeting. Azar was trying to save her energy so that she can go out and take on what ever was coming her way. The lack of water and food was starting to get to her but she was pretty sure that it was starting to get to everyone. That was not her only problem though, she hadn't been getting much sleep lately and now she was forcing herself to when she was given the chance. The pride was pretty quiet for now, once again for now, it never seemed to be quiet for too long. Including having quiet in her den.
She was about to lay down for another nap, her son Kakek, her son's (even though he was in denial) mate and her son's children had just left the den and she knew that Khin was out doing his Khin like things. It seemed as if almost everyone was leaving her alone and dropping their head when they walked by her or saw her. Azar didn't like those kind of things however she knew that it was going to happen and she knew that she was going to put up with it. Even though she was upset shse was pretty sure that everyone thought that she crippled with upset, even thought she was she was more angry.
She turned her head in the direction of the outside of her cave. It was the sound of her brother. She knew very well that it was her brother Xipil. She flicked her tail before finally deciding that she just needed to find out what he wanted so she could get her nap. She pushed herself up and then padded toward the front of the den. When she reached it she nodded her head toward her brother. "This sounds urgent." She said simply with a small chuckle as she did, not that sure of what else to say to him. She was always pretty light hearted with her siblings, including her more serious brother. She was always playful and friendly with them, even if they seemed to not like the idea at all.
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Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 2:55 pm
He attempted to offer her a smile when she greeted him, her tone sounding like she tried to be lighthearted. Emotions had hardly been his strong suit and it showed in how socially awkward (or rather more socially awkward) it made him. "Well," he began, his tone matter-of-fact. "It is," he said simply, the smile fading and replaced a serious expression. His mouth was set in a thin line, eyes seemingly harden and his brows slightly knitted together. "This is a matter of," he paused to choose his word carefully, "importance. Once concerning our military duties, not exactly a family matter but," he paused, swallowing trying to be careful in how he approached the subject. "Partially a family matter as well."
There he said it, he had begun to approach what many treated as a forbidden subject. Many had been hurt at the loss of his nephew and likely Azar and her mate had been hurt the worst but it wasn't something that could be danced around and avoided forever. The sooner a direct conversation regarding the matter happened, the better. Or at least that was how the red lion saw it. "I am worried about your emotion state and how it will effect your decisions out in the field," he told her, the look in his eyes softening slightly as he spoke. "I do not doubt you can handle yourself, you are my sister and we come from a family of strong, proud and able lions. I wholeheartedly believe that you will overcome the tragedy that has befallen us," he continued, beginning to feel if he was rambling on.
Though his primary concern was that he was insulting her with his words, which was the last thing he wanted to do. But he had never been good at constructing his words in a way that didn't sound condemning or likely offensive. He'd been working on it since his promotion and had made some progress but it wasn't something he often aware of. "I am concerned that moving into the fray too soon could result in you making irrational decisions."
There. It was all out in the open.
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Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2012 11:49 am
Azar had an idea of what was going to come out of her brother's mouth. Although they were siblings and worked together as the same rank, yes they had light and friendly conversations but it wasn't normal for either of them to hunt each other down for one reason or another. They would spend some time together but other wise it wasn't a effort to go out of the way for. She paused as she looked at her brother and then nodded at him. As he started talking. Her smile was too starting to fade as he was talking. A anger almost started building up in her as he talked. She did understand his concern she really did but that didn't mean that it frustrated her. She bit her lips trying not to spew out bitter words that were not only that nice, although truthful, words that she would regret. tried not to point out that her brother didn't know what it was like to have children, let alone to have a child die on them.
She paused and listened as her brother finished talking. She looked him in the eye as he spoke however after he was done she did not speak right away. She stared off away from him, not meeting his gaze as she thought about what to say to him. She really did, in all honestly understood what he was trying to say. She understood his point but there was one thing that she did not understand and that for sure was that she didn't really understand why he thought that she was one to be concerned about. Azar didn't like to be concerned over. She was capable of taking care of herself and proved that she could take care of others. If she could take care of others she was more than able to take care of herself. She flicked her tail around behind her, a little agitated still thinking everything out.
She looked at her brother and shook her head. "I'm fighting, Xipil." She said sternly before pausing and taking a breath before talking once again. "I want revenge and I will not be denied my right to receive it." She was serious she wasn't going to take no for an answer. She didn't even care if her father came marching to her and dragging her out of battle. She wouldn't stand it, she wouldn't take that at all. "I understand your concern brother, however I am more that capable of thinking clearly when going into battle and leading. I do know the other day my emotions were wild and I was not thinking clearly and although they are still are not in the best condition, I know I will be able to handle myself well enough on my own." She said simply in a huff, not very happy at the fact that he was trying to tell her what to do. Or, what not to do.
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Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 3:22 pm
She had reacted as he had expected, angered that he didn't believe that she knew how to conduct herself despite her grief, and as such he didn't even flinch when she asserted herself and the fact that she was fighting no matter what. He stood there, expression calm, as she spoke to him. He did not blame her for her reaction, he too would have likely been irritated had some said the same of him but having been so detached from his emotions already it did little to effect him when she riled up.
"I knew you would say that," he stated, "I am not trying to deny you anything sister." He shook his head, completely dismissing the idea. "I would never deny your chance at justice," he told her, avoiding the word revenge. It was an ugly word that could lead to ugly things but he would say nothing against her decision to use it. He could pretend to understand her pain, but he knew that as one without children, without a firm grip on the idea of emotions, he would never understand what she was going through.
"I was merely voicing my concerns for the whole rather than the individual," he began to explain, not realizing that his choice of words wasn't helping his case. "I have been told that grief can make someone do crazy things but I know that you are strong and fully capable of dealing with...this hard time," he paused tilting his head slightly as if he were concerned. "I have never been good with things like this, when it comes to emotions I am at a loss," he admitted, "but I believe that as the time passes your head clears and I merely sought to confirm what I should have already known."
A semblance of smile showed on his maw.
"I will not stand in your way, not at this time, because if you say that you will be able to think and lead wisely I believe you," he seemed to sigh. "I will stay behind, to formulate plans based upon the knowledge and intelligence I expect you will bring but please, do not hesitate to come to me if you see it fit."
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Posted: Fri Apr 20, 2012 7:30 pm
As her brother predicted what she would say, Azar almost predicted exactly what he would say back. She had grown up with her brother and even though she did not spend that much time with him recently she still knew him. To a point though as she was listening to her brother she was getting a little confused. A little irritated because she was confused. She flicked her tail around behind her and then she thought about what he was saying before speaking. "Well, brother, you're speaking in circles, you understand but you don't. You don't want me to fight but then you offer me justice." She looked at him and then shook her head. She really didn't get it. She didn't get it at all.
She really wanted to fight, and it went beyond her family really. Yes she wanted to get back what she had lost. She wanted to get her revenge, or as her brother put it, justice. She was angry at that but there was more that was for sure. She wanted to do what she had been training for since she little. Even though this rank wasn't around when she was younger, that didn't matter though in her mind. It was the same idea. She had wanted to be something great all of her life. Have a high rank, but not for the others looking up to her, she wanted it so that she could be her best. She could be her best if she was there and just being denied not only the justice but the chance to finally act in her role and lead the others made her feel as if rage was building up inside of her. There were many that didn't want her to fight and that was really all that she wanted to do. For herself and for her son. She needed to do it to a point. She needed to do it for herself for sure but she knew that it needed to be done for her son, her son that really never got the chance at a full life.
She looked at her brother and shook her head. "I understand your concern, truly brother I do. I think I get what you're saying but you have to understand. I can't let some one else do my job. He didn't have a mate, he didn't have children, he really had nothing other than his siblings and a few friends." She shook her head before speaking to him once again. "He really didn't have the chance to live his life." She shook her head once again before shifting herself so she was more comfortable on her haunches.
She nodded to him once again. "Thank you brother for believing me, I hope you truly do." She chuckled a little before nodding at him. "And thank you for coming and talk to me brother, I appreciate your concern." She said with a small smile still on her face. she was trying to be her normal self, and even though she was upset she didn't want to act differently. Or at least she was going to try her hardest not to act differently.
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