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 Posted: Sat Feb 25, 2012 11:55 pm
Clerise was a common decoration around the kitchens. Her previously strict diet was slipping a little-- she no longer had to be up and out into the tent by 7am, so she ate actual FOOD. Which meant splurging some kcals on things like hash browns. And cookies. And ice cream. Okay, so maybe it wasn't all related to breakfast shenanigans, but ...opportunity! Before, she'd have to actually buy food that wasn't so great for her, and now! NOW IT WAS ALL AVAILABLE TO HER IN ONE NICE AND EASY STOP. AND SHE REALLY, REALLY, HAD A SWEET TOOTH. So yet again, the redhead ventured into the kitchens, and stopped short as she saw an unfamiliar girl in there. Like many others she encountered here...the girl was baking. "Are you, by chance, making cooookies?" Clerise asked, ever so innocent. Her teeth hurt already. She was ready. Her body was ready.
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Posted: Sun Feb 26, 2012 4:08 pm
The "kitchens" was actually something of a futile attempt brought together by the more responsible and desperate Hunters currently living inside Deus Ex Machina. That is to say, after a couple of days of rationed, canned goods, they couldn't take this any longer, and had done their best to assemble a very small portion of the original kitchen. An EZ-bake oven that a few Life Hunters had spent days to make, mostly because making anything Julie proof took a ridiculous amount of time and effort, was currently seated on the only non-burnt kitchen counter in the entire area. It was too bad the Life Hunters hadn't actually devised a way to keep said Moon Hunter assistant out of the "in renovations" kitchen.
It was really, really, too bad that Julie had also, already spotted her next victim rewarding Clerise with big, brilliant, ten-thousand watt smile. "Oh, are you the volunteer that they said they were bringing me?"
If Clerise was paying attention to her surroundings, she would find the kitchens rather devoid of any other Hunters around.
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Posted: Mon Feb 27, 2012 4:44 am
Oh, and look how happy this girl was to see her! "Volunteer?" A flash of confusion and a raised brow at the bubbly girl. A quick inspection of her coat showed that she was a higher rank, though Clerise was oblivious that she was in some sort of...you know... Position of power. "But if I get treats as a reward, I'll do whatever you need, it's no big. Got nothin' on my plate today." Her own grin was shot back at the girl; wide and toothy. Oh, Clerise. You have no idea what you are in for. At all. For. Realsies.
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Posted: Mon Feb 27, 2012 9:19 pm
As Clerise talked, Julie had already begun treating the new EZ-bake oven, prodding it a few times rather forcefully with her spatula. Said object of her affections literally coughed and poured out a thick layer of black smoke everywhere.
Julie cajoled it for another second with another lighter prod - that yielded the same result - before turning her attention back to Clerise with a light wave of her free hand. "Oh! If you're looking for treats or things to eat, I have made plenty here!" Said free hand gestured to the pile of questionable black lumpy objects next to the EZ-bake oven.
Suddenly thick turrets of black smoke kind of made sense.
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Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2012 1:42 pm
Clerise looked at Julie, incredulous, as the poor little oven vomited smoke. "Girl. I am not putting those anywhere near the vicinity of my mouth." The redhead resisted the urge to z snap. "What are you doing to that poor baby oven thing?" She went over to it, coughing a little at the smoke, fascinated. She was having a hard time resisting the urge to unplug it.
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Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2012 3:13 pm
"Oh, thank you for asking!" Julie had mistaken Clerise's look entirely for that of interest. "See, Joy actually comes from Christmas minipets, so I took..."
As Julie explained her recipe, some of the words in her ingredients involving questionable things such as "Follyjoy tentacles" and "Reigndeer horns", the oven emitted a loud BANG, another forceful wheeze, and pretty much began to buckle and shake violently. The Moon Hunter ignored it entirely, as if this was completely normal.
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Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2012 3:42 pm
"MINIPETS?" Clerise looked horrified, her lower lip quivering. She took the other girl by the shoulders, shaking her a little-- almost tearful. "Why! W-Why would you do that?!" She looked on in horror at the shaking appliance, realizing why everyone said she was horrible. This was kind of terrifying. "What's...in there...right...now?" Clerise asked, hesitation in her voice. She wasn't sure she WANTED to know.
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Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2012 2:11 am
Julie paused for a second before she broke into a reassuring smile. It was not really that reassuring. "Oh, silly, you don't have to worry too much about them, they don't even feel a thing. I'm sure its rather nice really."
It was really hard to tell if Julie was referring to minipet third person, or if she was even talking about minipets at all at this point.
At Clerise's other question, the Moon Hunter blinked rather owlishly. "Oh my goodness, I almost forgot!" She quickly ran into the small-ish oven, hitting it a few times with her spatula, leaving some rather impressive dents. Most of the wheezing noises stopped. "Can you keep an eye on this? I'll be back, I forgot to pick up some ingredients, some super secret ingredients!"
She didn't wait for Clerise to say 'no' before she fled.
A minute or so passed where the oven didn't do anything much but shake once so often.
And then shake a little more violently.
And just a little more violently.
And then stopped.
Well, okay.
And then exploded.
What came out of the oven, or really from the result of the oven explosion, accumulating to a mass of three-foot, sludgey terror, definitely did not seem okay at all, especially when it started to wreck everything near it by consuming it. It started with the minipet ingredients first. OOC: MINI BOSS FIGHT - THE MINIBOS HAS 25 HP. - Roll your attack dice as usual. Every time you ROLL, your character does -5 damage to themselves. Apply damage as normal, you can use a charge attack on the third hit. - Good luck!
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its me debz rolled 2 8-sided dice:
6, 3
Total: 9 (2-16)
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Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2012 2:14 am
Clerise stared. Sure, the tentacles that REALLY LIKED her were kind of creepy. As were the spiders. As were the octopussies and nice hats that insisted on clinging to her head--
NONE THE LESS. THEY DID NOT...deserve...
"I don't want to keep an eye on this, ******** you, you're--!!"
The redhead turned to face the oven, eyeballing it with scrutiny.
She backed up a few feet as it vomited smoke at her and...
... "WHAT."
God. It was eating everything, and it had just run out of ingredients to eat. Lest she be next, Clerise summoned her weapon.
hp - 40 - 5 = 35
dmg - 9 - 6 = 3
boss hp = 25 - 3 = 22
charge - 1/3
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its me debz rolled 2 8-sided dice:
3, 7
Total: 10 (2-16)
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Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2012 2:16 am
SWEET GOOGLY MOOGLY IT ATE THE EASYBAKE. WASN'T THAT LIKE EATING ITS MOM? OR THAT WOULD BE JULIE, OH GOD OH GOD--
Clerise lunged at it with Balthazar, who actually went "ewwww" at her in his head-- he was covered in an awful, sticky, goopy...
...stuff.
That was potentially chocolate, potentially sugar, and most assuredly creepy.
And terrifying.
Maybe that too.
"You are GROSS. I AM GOING TO KICK JULIE. MAYBE. AfUUGhseughghhhh--"
hp - 35 - 5 = 30
dmg - 10 - 6 = 4
boss hp - 22 - 4 = 18
charge - 2/3
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its me debz rolled 2 8-sided dice:
2, 2
Total: 4 (2-16)
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Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2012 2:18 am
Oh my god, it got all over her.
Oh my god, Clerise was never going to be clean again.
Not now, not ever.
hp - 30 - 5 = 25
dmg - 0
boss hp - 18
charge - 2/3
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its me debz rolled 2 8-sided dice:
5, 6
Total: 11 (2-16)
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Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2012 2:20 am
"Getoffgetoffgetoffgetoff," Clerise half screeched, trying desperately to get the warm chocolate something out of her hair.
Oh my god. Why.
Why hadn't she listened to Marcus. Lunging blindly, Clerise slipped on...something... and sliced the sugary death gloop once more-- but not before it like...
Inked her in the eye... Or whatever it was.
Ugh.
It was like molasses with minipets inside it. This was awful.
hp - 25 - 5 = 20
dmg - 11 - 6 = 5
boss hp - 18 - 5 = 13
charge - 3/3
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its me debz rolled 9 4-sided dice:
3, 4, 4, 1, 3, 3, 2, 3, 2
Total: 25 (9-36)
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Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2012 2:29 am
For a brief moment in time, Clerise reflected on her life. On the sins she had committed in this one, and what fate she might get in the next, if there was indeed such a thing. There were moments, as the monster pelted her with warm sugar and god-knows-what-else, that made the redhead wonder:
Who the ******** hired that woman? Did she sic some sort of beast of her own fashioning upon them instead of enduring a job interview? Was she some sort of igor to her own mind, slaving away to make creations that were little more than abominations of life or minipets or FEAR or whatever maybe they were all the same thing?
Oh. Oh my god, it was down her tank top, and everything in the world was tainted with grey. Well. More like chocolatey brown with sugar and wings sticking out.
So Clerise screamed, throwing Balthazar at the beast, the ringblade cursing the whole goddamned time.
She was not having any of this goddamned s**t.
hp - 20 - 5 = 15
dmg - 22/2 = 11
boss hp - 13 - 11 = 2
charge - 0/3 , 1/2 used
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its me debz rolled 2 8-sided dice:
8, 8
Total: 16 (2-16)
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Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2012 2:43 am
Clerise decided to jump up and down on the remains of the gloopy pudding thing, howling in triumph as it died. She likely looked like she had been mud ******** YOU." hp - 15 - 5 = 10 dmg - 16 - 6 = 10 boss hp - 2 - 10 = 0 charge - 1/3 , 1/2 used
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Posted: Thu Mar 15, 2012 12:25 am
Julie came back in with a few interesting new supplies, such as an ironing board, which she promptly dropped at the sight of Clerise, putting one hand to her mouth. "Oh my." She walked a little closer, putting one experimental foot into the goo. There was an awkward moment of silence.
And then, "So, is it done yet?" She craned her neck to look at the oven that was very much not there any more.
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