|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 6:00 pm
Blame it on the goose
Got you feeling loose
Blame it on Petron
Got you in the zone
Blame it on the a a a a a alcohol
Blame it on the a a a a a alcohol
The club was bumping and Damian was having an awful time. Clubs sucked when you were trying to be a good boyfriend and not become a raging alcoholic again. He wasn’t really sure why he went out the club on his own in the first place. His self imposed ban on alcohol was ruining what used to be his favourite place to hang out while Carter was studying.
The redhead was just about to turn and leave the club disappointed when he stopped in his tracks. The sight of a lilac head had caught his eyes and a grin spread over his face. It was his broski Blake. Weaving through throngs of people he approached the very obviously very drunk man and clapped him on the back. ”Blake! What the hell are you doing here, man? Other than getting drunk off your a**.” He laughed pulling up a barstool and sitting next to him at the bar.
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 6:08 pm
"Yooooo. You." Who was he? s**t. Blake was pretty sure that somewhere in the drinkfogged misfirings of his mind he knew exactly who the hell this guy was. The beard was pretty unmistakable. "Thor. You're Thor. Gooood of Thunder. You're a Nord right? The Jarl of...s**t. That's just a bad really bad joke in my head man." Staring long at the russet beard as he nursed yet another drink he looked the guy up and down.
Up.
Down.
Stared at the beard in silence.
"What the ******** Damian. I thought you'd sworn off the scene to keep off the sauce. I am royal trashed bro. Vicks is on a ******** tear which means there isn't any ********. Not a goddamn bit." Chugging at the golden drink he gasped a breath with a perfectly charming belch at the end.
"You might as well be ********' Thor."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 6:24 pm
Damn. Blake wasplastered. It was pretty obvious when he couldn't identify him at first. He had started to laugh, but the sound was cut short when he was called Thor. What? How could he kn- Oh, ooooooh. The booming laughter was back in full when the redhead realized that Blake was talking about the mythological Thor. "Yeah, man, I'm Thor."
For a minute the two sat there and then Blake spoke again. Damian shrugged a bit guiltily. "I did, but hey, I'm not drinkin, right? And Carter's not here to yell at me, so there's nothin stoppin me from hanging out with my number one bro." He punched Blake in the shoulder lightly before he stared longingly at a bottle of Absolut behind the bar. It was like a stripper, he could look but goddamn it he couldn't touch.
Turning back to Blake he shook his head. "That blows, man. But hey, at least you'll get some eventually, she'll come around. I haven't gotten laid in months." He couldn't really talk about his nervousness about having sex with Carter. He didn't want to admit that he was scared he'd do something wrong, or even worse, not know what to do. Doing a guy was totally different than doing a girl much to his chagrin.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 6:33 pm
What. Whaaat?! How was such an awesome bro like Damian not scoring serious...woah. Well no wait no woah. Just because Vicks was trying to keep him away from phrases like 'Grade-A serious p***y' and 'snatch of a lifetime' didn't mean that he had to listen. Blake only had to jump through the fancy ******** hoops when there was some actual ******** going on. No doubt she was back home wailing while clutching her cell phone, calling her missing cousin, and watching Toddlers and Tiaras. There was a small guilty pang that permeated the ridiculously drunken haze, brushed off almost immediately.
She was the one being unreasonable. He had to hang on to that.
"Dude bro that's a ******** tragedy, and I'm totally serious about that...uh. Damn. Ag something? Descripty word." Whatever, Damian was quick enough to figure it out. "What's up? Swore off the p***y and the hooch? Man you can't be that nuts."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 6:43 pm
Damian nodded in agreement when his lack of sex was called a tragedy. It really was, Damian really enjoyed sex, and while he and Carter were sleeping together they weren't sleeping together. Damian was sure how to approach the subject with the bluenette, and oddly enough he was more worried about ruining the budding relationship by rushing the ********, than his constant blue balls. It was nice having someone he cared about enough that he put them in front of his need for sex, but damn not getting laid sucked.
At the idea of him swearing off females the bearded man laughed. "Well, you could say that. I got a boyfriend." He tried to sound cool and casual about it, but there was a hint of surprise to his voice. In his defense it was a bit of a transition, but he wasn't regretting it. "We're not really....yeaaah, let's just say we're not quite there yet." He eyed the vodka again, if he was going to start talking about his sex life (or lackthereof) with Blake he was going to need a drink. It's not like a single drink would hurt right?
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 6:51 pm
Things That Were Poor Life Decisions: Telling your incredibly drunk buddy who has almost no control of his word to mouth filter (if he ever did) that you are now a dudebanger. Not that Blake was especially concerned about who did what where when why how and all that jazz. He'd be one huge goddamn hypocrite if that were the case; Blake despited hypocrites almost as much as he hated Vicky witholding her hooha kittybits from him. For those listeners outside that was a whole damn lot.
"Shiiiiit. Man why you gotta pull something like that out. Listen." Putting a heavy hand on Damian's shoulder, the lilac-haired co-ed gave his best bro a soulful look. "Listen bro, seriously, just listen. You can dip your wick however but lemme just spare us both the weird. Keep it off me and we're cool, straight? Well not straight but what the ******** ever yanno?" Boy he was being a right charming hunk of civility tonight wasn't he? Even the thought made his face a bit sour, staving it off by snagging the bartender by one incredibly tight buttcheek. "Baby be a honey and get me another, and whatever my friend wants. His balls are bluer than my eyes, honeybunch."
Blake Allison was a skeezeball. But he was a lucky one.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 7:11 pm
Blake's reaction was actually a lot better than what Damian had expected. He couldn't help but laugh at his words. "Dude, you're not even my type or whatever. I mean, we're both good lookin men, no doubt, but Carter's the only guy I'd bang. Don't worry, your a** is safe from the monster in my pants" He smirked, shamelessly bragging about his trouser snake. He wasn't one to be modest about what he knew was a gift from genetics.
At the offer of a drink he hesitated for only a second before he spoke. "Like a drink will really help my blueballs." Despite his words he turned to look at the bartender. "I'll have a Crown & Coke." Looking back to Blake he shook his head. "Don't let me have more than one, man. Carter'll kill me if I come home drunk again." He'd just have the one drink and then walk it off before he went home. No biggie.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 7:23 pm
It was absolutely a commentary on the bond between First Bros that Damian trusted that Blake wouldn't let him have more than one. Blake who had obviously had at least half a dozen, wasn't near stopping soon, and was pretty sure that getting his First Bro as utterly ******** up as he was was the best idea possible. Best.
"Whatever man, we both know the monster in your pants is that gingerbush that is oddly mistaken for body hair. I'm not a chump, I know that's all you got to work with broski." This was a grand announcement made for anyone not listening to the drone of music to partake in, the smattering of awkward laughter was a testament to it. That made Blake feel like he was amazing. A veritable comedy god but he was out of material...for now.
"Dude just be the bro I know you are and keep me company before dumping my sorry a** on her doorstep. If I'm messed up enough maybe she'll lemme at her fine, fine a**." The baseball player sighed, pathetic desperation in his expression that only another man on the verge could truly understand. "I miss her sometimes."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 7:41 pm
Silver eyes narrowed and then rolled. "Sure, bro, you're just jealous that my d**k's bigger than yours. No need to hate, it's not your fault you got the short end of the stick." He punched Blake in the arm again, a little harder than the last time but still friendly.
"Sure, sure, but can I give you some advice? Just get a guitar. Bitches love guitars." He paused and stared at Blake for a long moment after he spoke the 'M' word. Taking a close look at him he shook his head. "Damn man, she's got you bad." He'd never seen his broski this strung out over a chick before. They definitely needed more alcohol. He felt a bit guilty about drinking again, he had promised Carter, but his bro needed comfort and it wasn't like he was going to drink all that much himself.
"Dude, drink that and then I'll buy you another, you need the alcohol." He gestured to their drinks which had just been dropped off. He picked up his own drink and began drinking it, the warmth of the alcohol sliding down his throat like a caress from an old friend. "What's so great about this Vicky chick anyway? You could take any of the fine, fine babes in here home in a flat second."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Feb 19, 2012 9:16 pm
A frustrated sound was drowned in the gurgle of booze down Blake's own throat. "Dude don't think I don't know it but that's really the problem. I mean...I dunno man you saw her at that camp right? Her a**?" Hands cupped around at the young man's waist with a reflexive squeeze before he sighed to drink again. "The problem is that I've tried it. It's not like I threw out my black book or anything; Vicks and I aren't supposed to really be exclusive. There's this like...understanding that we just don't want to bang anyone else regular." Thinking about it Blake decided if you couldn't tell your First Bro all the details you couldn't tell anyone, he groaned pathetically.
"I was making out with a fine piece of a** and all I could think was Vicks on the damn couch waiting for me to watch that damn pantyshow. Remember? Victoria's Secret: every teenage boy's wet dream in an hour of glorious runway color. She actually wears that s**t and looks at least as good as them damn models. Plus she's at least half as much a b***h as I'm a jerk. ******** A, Damian. ********. A." Blake was sunk like the ******** Titanic, was slowly becoming aware of it, and not at all pleased about it. Not even...well okay. A bit pleased because damn a girl cooler than Vicky Collins was pretty damn hard. Hotter was even harder.
Fuuuuuck.
"I need a whole lot of drinks."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Feb 19, 2012 9:44 pm
After the first sip of his drink Damian knew ordering had been a very Bad Idea. This whole one drink thing was the beginning of a very slippery slope, and he'd never had all that great of balance. He nodded at the mention of camp. He had definitely seen the redhead at the camp he, Carter, and Blake had volunteered at. She had been super fine. If he was single and she wasn't his best broski's girlfriend he would have totally tapped that a**. "Definitely grade A a**." He arched a brow as the arrangement was spelled out for him. The redhead was only nineteen, but he'd been in plenty of open relationships and one night stands in high school (he sometimes wondered if being a senshi kept the STDs away, but he had a feeling that was just stupid luck), and what Blake was describing sounded like neither.
Holding his tongue he let his buddy get it all off his chest. It was the least he could do, the man had bought him a drink. It was already gone, but that wasn't the point. He couldn't help but laugh at the description of the fashion show, it was pretty damn accurate. He supposed dating Carter had its perks, he didn't get roped into watching something that would give him massive blueballs with no way to get relief. At the mention of more drinks he got the bartender's attention waving her over. "Two of the same, beautiful." He grinned at her, silver eyes lingering a moment on her chest before he tore his eyes away and looked at Blake.
"Man, I gotta say it, it sounds like you got yourself a girlfriend, not a ******** buddy." He raked his fingers through his hair pushing it out of his face. "Next thing you'll know she's going to ask you to meet her parents. Your black book days are over, buddy." He clapped a hand on Blake's shoulder, his tone as serious as if someone had died.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2012 8:38 am
There was a low hiss emanating from Blake at the word 'girlfriend'. "Dude don't say s**t like that. I haven't had a goddamn girlfriend since like seventh grade. That was more than enough to keep me off the s**t forever yanno?" Except Damian was reinforcing what the lilac-haired athlete had been inching towards all along, that Victoria Collins was his girlfriend. They were living together. He liked it and did not really want to change anything about it which was a bittersweet taste if ever there was one.
Waving at the bartender he slipped the girl a bill large enough to make eating for the rest of the week a bit uncomfortable, gesturing at the bar. A large bottle of top-shelf whiskey was deposited with two double-shot glasses, a meaningful look in the bleary young man's eyes.
"Bottoms up. I need to ignore this s**t a little more."
The next morning he wasn't even entirely sure what had happened after that. Blake's first sensations were a slightly flat pillow beneath his cheek, his arm under a warm body, and a cold a**. A cold bare a**. On top of his arm was a chest that was not the delightfully smooth and rounded chest of a girl. It was decidedly furry. Manfurry. "The ********?!" Trying to wrench himself upright, Damian's weight kept the man pinned to the bed by his arm, a vicious hangover causing Blake to whimper and want to die. Dignity was something that had to be absolutely maintained.
How the ******** did they end up in bed together naked?! "Damian, wake the ******** up man!!"
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2012 10:17 am
God damn it. Damian groaned as his mind slowly rose from the dark depths of his alcohol infused sleep. What the hell happened? It took the man a moment but he managed to open his eyes shutting them almost immediately against the diffused dim light that made it into the room through the curtains that covered the window. His head felt like it had been split open and sloppily sewn back together, and his mouth was akin to a desert wasteland. Lying in bed he tried to focus, putting all of his mental power towards figuring out where the hell he was.
It smelled like his bed and pillow, that was a plus. It aso reeked of alcohol, not so much a plus. Shifting on the bed he immediately froze. There was a warm body pressed against his backside. A warm body that was built bigger than Carter. For a moment he panicked, but then the sound of Blake yelling at him simultaneously ramped his headache up to a 15 and made him remember the night before, or at least parts of it. <******** Christ, man. Keep your goddamn voice down." Belatedly Damian realized he was naked. And by the feel of Blake's junk pressed up against his a** the other man was naked too. Did they? No way. He imagined his a** would hurt more if he had been the catcher to his broski's pitcher. The redhead was oddly calm as he took all this in and poured over it. One thing he was a bit worried about was the location of his boyfriend. Slowly his hand disentangled from Blake's arm that was slung over his hip and he reached out to what little of the bed was unoccupied. It was cold. That wasn't a good sign. Unfortunately his brain could only process one problem at a time, and right now the more pressing problem was the one spooning him.
Of course, this had been the plan last night. A little payback for the jokes at Damian's expense via a practical joke of his own. He was starting to realize though that while it had seemed like an excellent idea when he was drunk it wasn't quite as excellent now that he was hungover and tangled up with his best bro. But, having gone this far it wasn't much of a difficult decision to decide to follow through with it. Rolling over he looked across the pillow at Blake, blinking the sleep out of his eyes. "Dude, what the ******** happened last night? My a** feels like it got rammed by a freight train."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2012 9:21 pm
Horror overcame hangover enough to send Blake sprawling down on the floor, looking like a panicked rabbit as he tried desperately to throw on a pair of pants. Judging by the feel of the fit they most certainly were not his pants, they were too baggy. He did not care. A hand dragged through his hair as he rasped in nauseous agony. "Bro get some ******** pants on or something what the hell did you do to me last night?" There was no way he'd been desperate enough to wickdip Damian.
No way.
At all.
"You must've got tangled up in some goddamn miracle with another wickdipper at the ******** club or something, I don't do that s**t. Ever." Well he'd done that particular act before in his life but the person on the other end had always been a female someone. No double pole action here. No siree. Just the thought of it had his stomach turning over so that the violet-haired young man was forced to drop on the edge of the bed with his head down while he breathed in and out.
"No ******** way I was involved in that man. Nope." And Vicky wasn't his girlfriend either.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Feb 21, 2012 1:49 pm
Watching Blake nearly fly out of the bed Damian had to try very, very hard not to laugh. Helpfully he had one of the worst hangovers in the world so that efficiently squashed any loud noise he was tempted to make. But even his hangover couldn't stop him from sniggering as he watched his bro put on his boyfriend's pants. It was going to be a bit awkward to explain to Carter where exactly those particular pair went. "Dude, I didn't do anything to you. What the ******** did you do to me?"
Slowly he sat up in the bed, having enough courtesy to pull the comforter up and over his lap to hide his junk from the world. "Right, so where'd those hickey's come from?" He gestured to the other man's neck which was peppered with bruise like marks of various sizes. "I don't see anyone else in the bed." Maybe it was a bit mean what he was doing, but really, Blake had it coming to him. You didn't shave your bro's head while he was sleeping even if he did beat your a** at Jenga. Twice.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
