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 Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 8:02 pm
These are notes that I keep in my brain since I have no one to talk about these things with. You can comment, read, or just plain ignore them if you want. I'm not trying to start any fights, these are just my thoughts on life.
Note to self: There are people in this world who believe that their own normality is so apparent and obvious that they strive to escape it. They affect flamboyant behavior and claim originality according to the fasion eccentricities of their time. They claim brains or talent or indifference in attempts to deny their own mediocracy.
Then there are those who are completely opposite. They feel their own strangeness and are terrified by it. They suffer until they are unable to appear normal to others, or they convince themselves that their abberation does not exist. These are the true freaks, the true originals.
Note to self: Most children grow up with a common grief of having to protect their parents from reality. It's bitter for us young people to see the awful sense of innocence that adults grow into.
Grownups can deal with scraped knees and dropped ice cream cones, but if they knew the real reasons we cry they would fling us out of their arms in horrified revulsion. Yet, we are young and as terrified as we are terrifying. We need to warm their adult stupidity. We cry and hide in their laps, speaking of defiled lollipops and lost teddy bears, only to gain a lollipop or stuffed bear's worth of comfort. We make do with it rather than telling the entire truth for which there is no remedy, saftey, or comfort at all. We survive until we can escape into the dim innocence of our own adulthood and it's forgetfulness.
Note to self: A lot of people in this world take pills, get surgery, exersize, and diet so that they can feel "good" about themselves. They want to be beautiful, since they believe that it would make them happy. And if they were beautiful, then people would love them. If people loved them, would it really make them happy? Or is it people NOT loving them that makes them unhappy? If people don't love them, then they assume that something's wrong with them. If they were loved they'd think that they were all right. Let's get the truth here. People don't want to be beautiful. They don't want to be thin. They don't want to be loved. They just want to know that they're "all right." Is it even possible to be happy when movies and television ads and the clothes in the store and doctors and the eyes on you when you walk down the street are all telling you that there's something wrong with you? No. You can't. Because you believe them.
I may or may not add more in the future.
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Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 8:11 pm
I'm not fully getting the second one. Either because of the caffeine and because it's night or because I'm stupid. xD
You mean how we hide stuff from our parents so they don't get worried? D:
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Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 8:15 pm
"Grownups can deal with scraped knees and dropped ice cream cones, but if they knew the real reasons we cry they would fling us out of their arms in horrified revulsion."
That's the key sentence in the second one. :3 We don't tell adults what's really making us hurt, what's really killing us on the inside just to protect them.
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Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 8:17 pm
Or so we don't get grounded. O:
xD
But yeah, you're right. Even when I was like, 5, I would do that because I didn't want to scare my mom or anything. o.o
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Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 8:19 pm
Yeah, like, I know kids who get high, drunk, and have sex all time. Of course the parents aren't going to ever know that by asking one of us.
It's kinda like the quote "Ignorance is Bliss". :3
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Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 8:23 pm
I think my mom would cry if she knew half the crap that I did. xD
I like that quote. x3
Like how I don't want to know half the stuff that's in what I'm eating or smoking or drinking O:
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Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 8:26 pm
Smoking and drinking is bad. D:<
Or at least, society has forced my brain into adopting that idea.
I should make a note about that. xD
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Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 8:28 pm
xD
Yeah, the second one. Society made you believe that. x3
And it's not bad as long as you don't get addicted and do it every weekend. x3
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Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 8:31 pm
It's not technically "bad" until the majority of all the "good" people, all the television ads and public service announcements, and all of the people addicted to things tell you that it's bad. D:
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Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 8:32 pm
Well, then I just won't listen to them. x3
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Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 8:34 pm
But that's what makes you determine right from wrong, and good from bad. xD
If nobody had opinions about that sort of thing...I can't even really imagine how the world would be. D:
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Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 8:37 pm
Well, I'll listen to them for other things, just not this. x3
Everyone would be dead. xD
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Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 8:40 pm
xP
No more philosophy! My head hurts. D;
How was your Valentine's Day? xD
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Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 8:43 pm
xD
Maybe another time when we're like...awake. xD
O:
I dunno. Normal-ish? xD
How about yours? O:
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Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 8:48 pm
Mine was pretty normal too. D:
I was gonna send a note or a candygram to a certain someone, or something, but she barely ever talks to anyone and I have no way of knowing if she has a boyfriend that could beat me up. xD
The day after Valentine's my science teacher was bitching about how only one person said "Happy Valentine's Day" to her. D:
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