Castiel Ansoomse:Cas walked back towards the den with high spirits. While Ani and Saeriel stayed at the den and napped, Mom had taken him out to watch her hunt. He didn't actually do anything, just watched her. He liked doing things with Mom, she sort of understood that he just needed to sit there and watch things rather than be involved. Samm and Dene had gone off training with Dad, but they should be back by now. And he couldn't wait to see them, he wanted to tell Dene how Mom had been so cool hunting and how he'd learned so much from it.
He entered the den ahead of his mother and looked around. He saw Ani and Saeriel and he saw Father, but...
"Where's Dene? Where's Samm?" he asked, looking with a frown from his father to his mother.
Rashida & Azrael:The hunt had gone rather well, and she had killed a gazelle with haste. She had been proud to show her boy just what she could do. She liked him being able to see the way you should hunt, and her being good at it gave him a good role model. She was dragging the dead creature by the throat, pulling the carcass behind her as she dragged in back to the den.
She had been happy to see Castiel as happy as she was. She loved her babies so..
When Cas spoke, her blue eyes turned up to Azrael, and she dropped the kill onto the ground. Confusion marred her features, and she looked around the den, her eyes growing more frantic as she did.
Azrael looked up from Ani and Saeriel, and he then took note of the absence of the boys around him. s**t. Sighing, he stood from his lying position and approached the kill. Rashida let out a warning grown that told him he was to answer before eating.
"They are around here somewhere, I assure you."
"It's nearly dark, Azrael. They should be home by now." Her voice was soft, loving, as it always was.
Castiel Ansoomse:
The frown on Cas' features deepened as his father just stood and headed towards the kill. His mother, she put him right, she made sure Father answered her before he dug into the kill. But they weren't around here, Cas could smell it. Any scent of Samm and Dene was old. His ears flicked back.
"They're not around here. Weren't you with them? Didn't you take them training?" he asked, his tone growing demanding with each word. Where were his brothers? Where was Dene? No, he was supposed to be here, he was supposed to tell Dene about how much he had learned.
Rashida & Azrael:
"Castiel I suggest you watch your tone with me." The male responded, but again it warranted another glare from his mate. He took a deep breath, and nodded.
"They were training with their ears. They weren't allowed to use their noses.. I thought it would keep them busy for a good long time, but I had hoped they would have returned by now. Did you not see them out by the hunting grounds?" He asked the two, raising an eyebrow, rather hopeful. He hadn't realized that something could be wrong.. He simply had thought they had just been enjoying themselves.
Rashida felt her world spin. She took off out of the den, her eyes frantic with worry. Where were her boys? Her bright, beautiful, loving young boys.. Surely Dene of the two of them could have led them back to home.. He was the eldest of the two.. he..he had to.. She had so many thoughts rushing through her head, and she knew Azrael felt her worry. He normally wouldn't have stepped closer, but he did. As she stood outside the den, roaring loudly so that they might here, she burrowed her head into his mane.
"Oh Azrael.. Tell me they are okay.."
Castiel Ansoomse:
Castiel was frozen as his mother fled the den and began calling his brothers' names. His brothers were lost? No, they were okay, they were just... Dene was just playing a trick on them and he'd gotten Samm to play along. That's what it was, just a game, just a trick. That was it. That was it.
He ran outside after his parents, stopping several lengths away.
"Go find them!" Never, he never would have challenged his father like this. A deep part of him knew it was wrong. But his father had lost his brothers! How could he? They were his flesh, his blood! Did they really mean so little to him? Would he let this happen to Ani? To Saeriel? Did food mean more to him than his own offspring? Unaware of the feeling growing inside of him, hate rose with a taste of bile in his throat.
Rashida & Azrael:
Rashida was a mess, tears streaming down her face as she called for her boys once more. The only sound that returned were the fluttering birds overhead. She stepped away from Azrael, and Azrael looked at the boy. He wanted to smack him, just to get him to stop worrying his mother, worrying his mate.. But he knew that wouldn't help and lord knew he didn't ever want to lay a paw on his own brood. He wasn't the type. But the dead heavy weight in his chest terrified him.
"We will find them Castiel." He said, his tone warning though Rashida turned on him just then. The normally docile, kind female lashed out at Azrael with claws that were extended and ready to hurt.
"What did you DO?! WHAT DID YOU DO?!" She repeated, and tears were down her cheeks.
"Don't you dare threaten Castiel. I swear if they are gone, Azrael, you will have ruined my trust. I will never leave you with them again, ever." It was so out of character for Rashida to scream at Azrael the way she was, but her heart was panicking. If they were anywhere close they could have responded.
"What if they're dead?"
"They aren't dead." He responded.
"HOW DO YOU KNOW?!" She screamed back, claws lashing at him once more.
Castiel Ansoomse:
Cas shrank back, baring his teeth in anger and defense when his father growled at him. His father had never done that before. But then, Cas had never thought his father could just leave any of them on their own like he did with Samm and Dene.
His mother... Yes, she would protect them. She got between him and his father, but then she lashed out at his father. He didn't want anything to happen to his mother. He needed her, Saeriel and Ani needed her. Without her who knew what would happen.
"Mama!" he cried and launched himself at her front paws, careful of her claws but clinging to her. She couldn't fight his father, she needed to protect them.
Rashida & Azrael:
Azrael looked defeated. Deep down he was trying to hide the immense sorrow he was feeling. The guilt was deafening to his ears and he wanted to die right in that moment.
"I-Im sorry.." He said, his eyes bearing into his mates. He loved his son, but his mate was first on his mind. He had failed her. He was a horrible father and he had always known it. His fake smiles, his fake displays of affection. He had thought that the more he tried, the more he wuold succeed, and then here he was. He had lost two of her children.
"I-I..I.. I don't know what to do." He sat, and tears stained his cheeks as he sobbed. He had ruined everything. Damn him.
Rashida took Castiel behind her paw, pulling him in to her. She nuzzled him lovingly, giving all the love she could. She hoped he could feel it, he hoped she knew how very much she cared for them. She loved their father too, and even though he had hurt her, wounded her so badly it was worse than any physical pain anyone could ever inflict.
"I need to go find them Castiel..I need to go find them." Her voice was defeated, as if she didn't expect to find them alive. Though finding the bodies of her babies would be the undoing of her.
"Az.. I know you didn't mean it.." She said softly, her heart breaking. She had never seen him dissolve in a fit of tears before. She took a step to him, closing the distance, all the while pulling Castiel with her. She gave Azrael a soft nudge.
"We just have to find them. I can't sleep knowing they could be in anythings belly.." Her voice was a strangled sound, she was trying so hard to be brave and strong.
Castiel Ansoomse:
He clung to his mother, hating it when she pulled him closer to the father that didn't care. He didn't watch like he knew his father should. He hadn't been there.
The dream, the dream came rushing back to him. Samm and Dene, they were gone, his father hadn't cared, he'd let it happen. His nightmare had come true.
Cas let out a soft cry of anguish as he clung tighter to his mama. Samm and Dene were gone, but he knew in his heart they were alive. But he was presented with a choice in that moment. Samm and Dene were calling out to him, begging him to find them. But here, he had Ani and Saeriel and Mama. Mama would be broken if she lost another one of them and he knew he couldn't trust his father with Ani and Saeriel again.
He couldn't leave, couldn't go after his brothers. He just had to hope to the gods that somehow they would come home.
Rashida & Azrael:
"I'll go.." Azrael said, his tears halting as he stood. He wiped his eyes with a paw, looking down at the son he could almost feel the hatred of. It was just sorrow, he thought, Castiel didn't hate him.. Right? But he hated himself. In that moment he wished he had never laid eyes on Rashida. Not because he wanted her gone but because she didn't deserve him. Didn't deserve any of this.
"I'll go look for them. You can stay with the children.. I shouldn't be alone with them anymore anyway." He said, and lowered his maw down to Castiel.
"I'll find them Cas.. I'll find them and you won't have to hate me.." He said softly, and then he started walking, his purpose clear.
Rashida wanted to call out to him. Tell him it was stupid for him to go alone, but she couldn't. She wanted her babies found, and it was true, she didn't want to leave her cubs. She waited until Azrael dissappeared in the shadows, and her free paw touched Castiels back. She looked down to see him clinging to her leg, holding on for dear life as if she would float away from him too.
"Oh my dear, sweet boy.." She said softly, voice tinged with sorrow.
"Momma is here.. I'm not going anywhere.. and your father.. He will find them." She said, though her eyes lacked the conviction her words prayed for.
Castiel Ansoomse:
Blue eyes were sharp on Azrael as Cas looked to him, listening to his words. Hate, what was hate? Was that what this feeling was? That he would never look to his father for anything in the future, would never trust his father again? If that was hate, there was nothing Azrael could do to change that.
And then his father was gone and his mother was hugging him, trying to soothe him. His face felt wet from his own tears.
"No, Mama. They're lost in the fog and mist and I'm the only one that can do anything and I can't do anything at all," he whimpered, burying his face in her fur.
Rashida:
She cuddled him tight to her, and then lowered her muzzle so she could comfort him. She rubbed her nose against his cheek, her eyes questioning with concern.
"What do you mean, Sweetheart?" She opened her mouth to say more but truth be told, his answer had been such a quizical response.
"Why would you be the only one who could help them, my brave warrior?" She lowered herself on to her belly, smelling that her other cubs were still asleep in their little nests of pelts. She had time to comfort her sweet little child as he cried against her leg.
Castiel Ansoomse:
Cas looked up at her, tears streaming down his face.
"I had a dream, Mama. They were gone and he hadn't stopped them, he hadn't saved them. I could hear them, they were calling for me to help. Ani didn't want me to go. But I did and I woke up and Dene was there, Mama," he whimpered, then pressed his face into her fur again, rubbing back and forth as he shook his head.
"But I can't leave you, Mama, or Ani or Sae..."
Rashida:
She had heard of those dreams before.. She had heard of the supposedly cursed that had carried the ability to dream what was going to happen. Though her old pride, had always considered it a blessing.. It was a way of keeping everyone alive sometimes. But was this one of those times? Or had her boy merely dreamed this and it had coincidently come true..
"Castiel, tell me my darling.. Have you had those dreams before?" She knew this wasn't the time to ask those questions, she knew he needed the comfort but she just wanted to curl him against her and kiss away all his tears.
"My brave boy.. When the time is right, we will find them.. You will have them back, and all will be well once again." She said, though she wasn't sure she beleived it. He was right, she wasnt sure she could handle him leaving her as well. Her heart was a mess right now, and as selfish as it was she wanted to hoarde her babies with her for the rest of her life now..
Castiel Ansoomse:
Cas shook his head; it had been the only time he had dreamed something like that. But...
"Sometimes I do something and then get to do it again," he replied, trying to figure out how to explain it. They were visions, very fast ones, but visions nonetheless. He just know what was about to happen several seconds before it did, giving him a chance to change something, sometimes. He just wished he could have known this would happen, that Dene had been wrong, that his dream wasn't just a dream.
"And I can change it, sometimes..."
Rashida:
She smiled weakly, nuzzling into his little cheek once more. Her son had been given the gift. Of all the cubs in the world her boy had been given it.
"Can you feel them baby?" She asked, wondering if he knew if they were alive. She wouldn't pressure him any more than that, but she wanted to know if he could see them, feel them, at all.
"You have been given the gift, Castiel. It is a great honor, and I wish I could have found out in better circumstances." She said softly, licking his tearstained cheek with affection.
"Don't you worry my darling. I'll go no where, I'll never leave you. Do you hear me? I won't ever leave you." She said, wishing she had said the same to Samm and Dene..
Castiel Ansoomse:
A gift... It didn't feel much like a gift.
"They're out there, Mama. I know it," he replied, not sure that his brothers were alive and safe in his mind, but he knew it in his heart. He couldn't think of it any other way. If he even considered the thought that there was something wrong, that they were truly forever gone, he... He wouldn't be able to handle it.
"They just have to be..."
