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 Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 1:07 am
Jerry had a dilemma. A dilemma that could be solved with the right research, he was sure. And who was better to go to for guidance than someone who apparently had the skills needed to master the issue and yield positive results.
Robert was perfect, and the fact he was next door made it even easier to wobble over and meekly knock. PRESENTING the problem would be the difficult part, but he would cross that bridge later.
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Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 1:10 am
There was a thud.
Then a bang.
Then a "HANG ON A ********" to follow.
Shortly after, Robert opened his door, hopping on one foot as the other one was in his hand, being cradled in pain. He'd stubbed his pinkie toe on the bed getting up in haste, thinking he was being visited by a certain angel.
Nope.
Just Jerry.
Robert dropped his foot and stared at the man who would one day receive a mug from him as a gift, with the words "Worlds Dorkiest Phoenix" etched on it.
"Sup bro?"
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Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 1:13 am
Jerry flinched, pushing his glasses up his nose as the door suddenly swung open. His burns were healing int heir days back, and thankfully he had gotten replacement glasses that looked suspiciously *exactly like his old ones*. He picked at his bandages, smiling weakly, "Ah... Hello Robert! Um! We er... haven't spoken in a while I hope you're er... recovering well?"
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Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 1:15 am
Robert slumped slightly, holding back the immediate urge to call him a nerd for his greeting, but instead reached out and grabbed the poor guy under one beefy arm, pulling him inside.
"Stop being a homo and get in here." He sighed, closing the door with a slam and letting Jerry go only after he'd gently shoved the bespeckled Phoenix towards a chair. "You sound like a man with s**t on his mind. Drop your load or get out."
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Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 1:18 am
The nerd in question gave a yelp of pain as his burns were first crushed and then smashed up against a chair. After a moment to collect himself, he wondered if this was a bad idea.
Maybe he should have gone to Jordan first.
Well, he was here now, there was no getting around it.
His face reddened at the 'homo' comment, "A-actually.. it's um. Um. I... ah... s-seeing how you and Miss Petra were um." He fidgeted, growing more flustered with every moment, "There's um. This girl."
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Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 1:22 am
At first, it sounded like Jerry was about to ask about Petra. Robert did not care how many scars that boy had, he was going to get a punch to the face if he didn't shut his-
"A girl?" Robert perked visibly, his eyes wide as they stared vacantly at Jerry. "Like, a girl, for you? I thought.."
Uh oh.. looks like someone actually thought Jerry was batting for the other team.
"Are you boning her?"
Classy.
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Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 1:26 am
The man's face went scarlet. "ROBERT!" Breath in, breath out. There was no backing out now. "Er... n-not... not yet. We haven't even... I mean... well... I mean... I'm pretty sure she'd like to- But I don't want to just... I mean... we're all going to be here a long time and... and if things go wrong, I don't want them to be awkward and..." And things always went wrong for him. He wanted them to go right this time. "I... I was going to set up a date. A proper one. Er. To the best I can manage here. I was just... wondering um. What you might... might advise?" he managed finally.
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Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 1:28 am
Not yet.
"Hooolyyy s**t." Robert had to sit down for a minute, and leaned back slightly, tipping a nonexistent hat. "Jerry. You just earned some Robert points. Save those bitches up man, buy something nice one day. Like a good sex tip or something. I don't know. Who's the lucky lady?"
He tried not to laugh when he said lucky.
"Wait."
Robert leaned in, very close, and his eyes narrowed. His voice took on a dangerous tone. ".. It ain't Ennea, is it."
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Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 1:29 am
The blush was soon replaced by a blank expression, "Robert, she's like twelve."
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Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 1:30 am
"THE ******** SHE IS!" Robert looked like he'd just been slapped in the face. "I mean I know she's young but.. THE ******** SHE IS. Anyway. Good. Not Ennea. And I never saw you sniffin' around Maddie. So, who then?"
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Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 9:26 am
Jerry flinched, looking like a deer about to bolt until Robert's voice dropped down again and he remembered how to breath. "Aaaah.... d-do... do... do you know... Miss Candace? She's um. P-pretty girl, I don't know if she's um. Mexican or... er... Indian or something... she's got the most lovely lavender eyes..." He wobbled, fidgeting with a distant look on his face as he scratched at his bandages once more.
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Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 2:08 pm
"Candace." Robert visibly relaxed, and nodded sagely. "Ah-huh, I know her. Jerry likes the mocha chocolata.. very nice. B-cup, maybe 32-24-36? She's got curves, man. You sure you can handle it?"
Even as he was guessing Candace's specs he was making an hourglass shape with his hands. "Probably a beast in bed. All in all I'd say a real nice choice, bro. She's even got a mouth on her, don't she? She's probably gonna turn you into her little puppy, HA!"
It was clear by the comparison of Robert and Jerry's descriptions that the two men held different ideals for women. At least, on the superficial level.
"So." He bent in, and his face took on a very serious expression.
"The ******** you tellin' me for."
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Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 2:56 pm
Jerry cleared his throat, removing his glasses to give himself something to stare at as he carefully cleaned them. "W-well... I er... Like I said... I wanted to... you know. Set up something special. She's been very hard on herself after the mission, you know? I wanted to... do something romantic for her." And why he thought Robert was the person to go to for advise was suddenly more and more of a question in the back of his mind. "She's... um... tricky, though. I mean. She was... rather upset when I um." He picked at his bandages again before putting his glasses back on.
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Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 7:16 pm
"Ohhh, you wanna romance her. Wine and dine her. And you came to me because you know I'm good with the ladies." Now it all made sense. He reached out and clapped Jerry on the shoulder, hard. "Sure, I can help you out. What do you know about her, anything? Details are always the thing to help you really get in a girls pan- err, good side."
His last comment had Robert crunching his face in confusion. "When you what?"
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Posted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 9:41 pm
"Almostdied-" He winced with a yelp as the slap landed firmly on his burns. "Or... r-really died... apparently," He shifted away from Robert with a weak smile, "But she's um. Been very good about helping me with my b-bandages and er... so on so she's not TOO angry..." He cleared his throat again, wobbling to his feet to nervously pace out of burn-smashing reach, "She listens to a lot of music... not GOOD music, unfortunately, but I know she likes it! And er... she's... very active... and smart and um..." Honestly... he didn't really know that much about her, come to think of it. "She's a perfectionist, and... um.... Well... we were being tortured int he house at one point and um... I p-panicked and um. Sort of asked her out for coffee. I thought we were about to die, and it was the only thing I could think about."
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