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Posted: Sun Jul 24, 2011 2:50 am
Hai people. I have a problem and would like some help/ideas/advice. I am a closet bi-sexual(most of my friends dont know, and noone in my family knows). Well my girlfriend wants to meet my parents. The problem is 90% of my family are homophobes. Does anyone have any advice/help/ideas? I would really appreciate if you would share them.
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Posted: Sun Jul 24, 2011 3:01 am
Honestly if they're really bad about their homophobia, then its probably better not telling them. :/ Sadly.
Though if you really want to, you'll have to ease them into the idea. I dunno, maybe get them in really good moods and then tell. Good luck though. I know its always rough.
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Posted: Sun Jul 24, 2011 3:12 am
yeah if they are like that it might be better to not tell them. you said 90% though so are there members of your family that would possibly not have any negative feelings about it correct? if so it might help to tell them. personally none of my family knows i'm bi (but i would probably tell them if they asked)
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Posted: Sun Jul 24, 2011 3:40 am
Yeah I told my cousin first cuz we're close but the rest eventually found out and they haven't taken it well so uh...yeah it just depends on what you want.
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Posted: Sun Jul 24, 2011 7:56 am
yeah, well the one thats really bad about their homophobia is my dad he threatened to disown my brother when he though my brother was gay with me he will probaly send me to military school, or ship me off to live with my mom (my parents are divorced) well my sister isnt a homophobe, so do you guys think i should start by telling her? i dont want to have to keep hiding who i am from them though, i think if thry can deal with the crap my physchatrist is saying is wrong with me then they should be able to deal that im bi right? well sadly i dont think thats the case
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Posted: Sun Jul 24, 2011 8:22 am
Hmm go with your sister first.
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Posted: Sun Jul 24, 2011 9:47 am
yes, if you really want to tell someone i guess tell her. just make sure she wont tell your dad sweatdrop *punches psychiatrist*
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Posted: Sun Jul 24, 2011 6:39 pm
You can also explain the issue to your girlfriend and maybe have her meet everyone as a friend first, and if they end up really liking her they may be less angry that your dating her. My moms friend was a homophobe and her daughter came home for a visit with her friend who she revealed as her girlfriend at the end of the trip. Her mom claimed that she really wanted to be pissed about it but couldnt be since she liked the girl so much.
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Posted: Sun Jul 24, 2011 6:49 pm
My mom was a homophobe, and when I told her, it totally changed her outlook on the subject. Not saying it's the same for you, but maybe you should just let your girlfriend know that they're homophobic, that way she doesn't think you're avoiding it.
I hope things get better with the family :/
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Posted: Sun Jul 24, 2011 7:18 pm
Tell your girlfriend your situation. But, seriously, I think she should already know that. No secrets between couples is the best way to keep a relationship working good. My mom and dad know my boyfriend as just a friend, even when my bf's family knows me as his boyfriend. But he knows that from the beginning. Dont be shy with your girl, and don't let anyone to push you to something you dont want, or dont feel ready, to do.
(:
My bests!
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