Welcome to Gaia! ::

Bell stopped by the park that morning after her self defense class. At this point, the class was more of a stress reducer when she felt like pulverizing something, since she really wasn't much of an active-duty senshi anymore. Protect those you care about, and don't get involved in unnecessary fights. That seemed to be the motto now. Having just come from class, up put some color to cheeks that were already normally a light rosey shade. She'd tied her long hair back in a high ponytail that morning instead of her usual braid, and sported a tank top with a pale blue light-weight jacket, and workout pants to match. It probably looked like something the Crystal Academy yoga class would wear...

It was the beginning of May, and the temperatures outside seemed to be most favorable. For some places final exams were going on, and proms being planned. Bell might have still been a trifle disappointed in missing out last year, but looking back on who she'd have been going with, it was probably for the better. However none of this had anything to do with the nineteen year old, seated on the small wooden park bench along the walkway.

No, the Bell seated there didn't to seem to have much of a care at all whether it was May or August - the beginning or end of a semester. A long sigh might have indicated either tiredness or boredom. It was hard to tell. Bell seemed to be in one of those moods that was best summed up by the wondrous word, 'blah.'

Huh? Blue eyes blinked a couple of second before recognition came to her currently slow and foggy post-workout mind.

"Hey! Mnn, sounds good, thank you," she reached for the Danish, leaving the scone for him. It was his food after all. "How've you been?" Bell asked with a smile.

She hadn't seen Jamie since that first Elysion battle, and she hadn't felt the most socialable in the hospital. In fact, she has been down right bitchy. Angry at Tallulah, perhaps still angry, but she wasn't mulling over it. It just made her feel all the worse about her first kill. And that wasn't she planned on repeating unless absolutely necessary. Getting so in to the battle, the blood lust, was scary. And she wasn't too fond of having her identity outed to someone she didn't know.
She hadn't caught wind of Jamie and Tallulah's breakup, but honestly, it probably wouldn't of surprised her if she really thought on it. And she certainly wouldn't hold anything against Jamie. especially if her current grudges held any sway.

"I've been well. Coping with things as best a senshi can," That said things would never be particularly spectacular or normal. At least, that was Bell's current opinion. When Jamie chose to inform her of his own news, her brows lifted.

"Really? No, I hadn't heard. Then again, I haven't talked to her since..." well, Bell hadn't said anything at the hospital soooo~ "sometime before Elysion? And no one else mentioned it." Ummmm,... "I suppose I shouldn't be nosey but~" She prompted for details.

"Ah, well, I think she did invite herself over to Xavier's one afternoon, but it must have been before things went down between the two of you. Since then, I don't know if either of us have seen hide nor hair of her," Bell made a face that suggested that she really didn't care one way or another.

"And yeah, that is kind of odd~" Then again, Tallulah hadn't exactly seemed the romantic type. And now that she thought about it, she had to wonder when the she and Jamie ever really had time to get 'promise ring close.' To Bell, such a think spoke of a certain level of closeness and contentment, true partnership, within a relationship. Then again, if that was her definition of that who knew what her definition of engaged was.

"Well, I guess it's nice to know who of the two is more mature. Did she at least give the ring back?" In Bell's world, that would have been the right thing to do. Because for one, what girl wanted a reminder of past screw-ups laying around? And two, that ring had to be expensive, and would probably at least pay the rent for a month. Maybe more depending on the price.

"of course I was talking about you," Bell chuckled. "And no, no reason for me to be upset. I mean, I don't suppose Tallulah and I were really good friends. I joined the Basterds because she saved me from getting my starseed stolen once. It was a debt to repay. Then things turn out that she's childhood friends with Xavier and~"

Then Jamie asked about how things were going with she and Xavier, well, there was a change in subject and tone right there, as indicated by the small warm smile that appeared on her face.

"As far as relationship things go, we're doing good, but Xavier, well...I try my best to help him with whatever issues fall upon his shoulders, but there are some things that just aren't my business, y'know? And the best I can do is have him know I'm there if he needs me. After Elysion it seems like there have been a lot of things weighing us down. And after what the Blood Moon Court pulled~"

That steered Bell in to a whole new train of thought, and she looked over at Jamie wide-eyed, and hushed her tone a little;
"Did you know they kidnapped and tortured some Negaverse agents, some even to death!?" A look of horror and disgust passed over her face. "It doesn't matter what faction you're from, torture is wrong. ANd what if the Negaverse retaliates against the senshi as a whole, not just the faction responsible? Death rates have been dropping recently because they've stopped taking so many starseeds. Their main beef is with us. And...and I'm not sure which side is right anymore." She looked away somewhat worried.

"They claim to be fighting for the good of the earth, against us, alien invaders. And I suppose despite being born on earth in this incarnation, we are alien, if we're to believe Kurma.... And the senshi believe they're also protecting the earth against the Negaverse.... What if we're all just puppets? Pawns? What if both sides are being strung along by those with more knowledge about this war?"
Bell sighed heavily.
"That is why I'm not going out and seeking battles. I'm only going to fight if they attack me, or if they're hurting someone I care about."

So, Lily was with them. It was confirmed. She had assumed, given Xavier's reaction when she had told him about the BMC's antics, but confirmation was good. Well....maybe that wasn't the right word...

"The Negaverse's methods aren't something I agree with, but if we set the toll of destruction side by side, the Senshi seem to have cause far worse than they've solved. Coma incident included. And yes, I...sat and talked with a newer lieutenant who gave me the whole story as they understood it. And I was there as the Negaverse came to rescue their own. The whole lot of them. Everyone. I doubt the senshi would ever band together like that to rescue any of their number. The small groups and tiny factions maybe, but everyone?"

It was disheartening. Bell supposed her own resolution only fractioned the senshi's 'everyone-ness' further. But...she couldn't fight for a city that thought they were terrorists. Couldn't fight for a cause she wasn't 100% sure of. She wouldn't be a pawn, if that were the case either.

"Whatever their queen has told them, lies or not, using them as pawns to her own agenda or not, it has pulled them together. I can admire that, even if their methods are less than desirable. And...I really just can't shake the feeling that we're pawns. The senshi and the Negaverse."

"I'm afraid my familiarity with X-Files does not extend beyond the title itself," Bell then gave a soft laugh, "But if you're aiming to say I'm a bit paranoid, I'm sure I am. Just a little."

Bell hadn't taken any trips to Bellatrix. She didn't really care to learn much about her past self, or what her world was like. Not with so much going on in the present. And she really hated that 'Learn from the past' bullshit. It wasn't like anyone she knew had come back with any answers about how to set things right NOW.

"Nope," Bell replied simply. "Not really interested either. I've got enough questions and stuff to deal with now without trying to uncover the past that, quite frankly, isn't going to effect anything now." Or it shouldn't at least. That's how Bell felt. She was also perhaps a little afraid to find out what she had been like in the previous life.

"So," Bell then quickly piped up with yet another subject change, "since Xavier hasn't brought it up, he probably doesn't know yet, so would you like me to inform him of your current status change before a certain someone gets a hold of him? I can get back to you with his reaction so you know whether to run and hide or not," Bell chuckled a bit. Somehow, she didn't see Xavier as the type to go all man-hunter on Jamie.