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 Posted: Wed Apr 27, 2011 6:58 pm
Once Sharra had gone over to Yaya and the dragon boil saw that the two of them were talking . . . he turned away slowly, to start making his way out of the crowd and toward the dorms. At this point, all he wanted was to sleep for about a week. But that detention still loomed, supposedly - a punishment he found to be wholly unfair considering the situation at the time. With a weary sort of shrug, he dismissed it from his mind for the moment, eyes lidding. The dragon was so very tired that he didn't even think about shifting to get his wings back, just plodding along toward the Monster dorms with head hanging downward and once-fine clothes in bloodied rags.
At least most of his injuries were healed by this point, though the aches left behind would likely take days to fade. And the things he had seen on that island . . . he had the feeling they would stay with him forever. By the time he reached his own room, Aksaja was all-but dead on his feet, just stumbling inside and heading for the first even vaguely soft surface he could find, and within moments he was asleep.
Several hours later, however, the dragon boil made a low noise and twisted about slightly in his sleep, caught in the grip of nightmares spawned by their experience on that island. Once again, he relived everything, except in the dream . . . no one came back. He just kept on seeing his father over and over again, watched his friends die a dozen times, heard the laughter and mocking of the huge dark dragon . . .
Until finally, he woke himself up with a sharp cry, drenched in sweat now and clinging to a pillow as if that would save him. Scrambling up, he turned the lights on and then sat shivering for a few moments, trying to banish the images from his dreams. When that didn't work, he bit his lip slightly and finally reached for his eyePhone. He needed something to do, someone to talk to . . . at least. Pulling up his messages, he sent a quick text to Sharra, just hoping the other boil was still awake.
// How is Yaya? Feeling better? I can't sleep. //
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Posted: Sun May 01, 2011 8:15 pm
The buzz of his EyePhone awoke the nergal boil, and he stirred faintly, warm in the covers next to Yaya, the two having collapsed together after their bath and the long talks that had come afterwards. Shifting, he thumbed to the message...rather wondering just what any of his classmates were doing up in this hour, now that they'd finally gotten the chance to rest. Noting that it was from Aksaja, he smiled thinly...seemed that the dragon couldn't rest, and Sharra could hardly blame him. He'd done his utmost to keep his own terrors from disturbing the ghoul next to him, the nightmares causing the nergal to awaken in a cold sweat more than once...but the soothing presence of the marid beside him, always calmed him back into sleep.
It didn't seem that Aksaja had anything remotely resembling the same luxury. Wincing, Sharra carefully shifted out of the sheets, tossing legs over the bed and moving to fumble for his pants. They were the one other item, barring his boxers, that he hadn't given up as a completely lost cause after their little island jaunt. Sliding them on, he leaned over only for a moment to plant a kiss into Yaya's dark hair, a whisper of a caress, and then he moved for the door, putting his EyePhone back into his pocket in the event that she needed him.
// Yaya's doing much better...she's asleep. Do you need to talk? I can come over. //
Aksaja, after all, had proved himself a near and dear friend during the events, the least that Sharra could be...was a listening ear. Damn...he really knew so little about his friends, and he had to wonder just what terrors were the ones most pressing to the dragon boil, the ones that kept him awake despite exhaustion.
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Posted: Sun May 01, 2011 8:20 pm
Oh thank Jack he was still awake . . . or had been woken up, or something. Shivering slightly, the dragon wrapped one arm about his knees. He did need someone to talk to, but now he felt guilty and a little bit ashamed of his knee-jerk response to the nightmares.
But well . . . Sharra was already awake now. With a soft sigh, he raised the eyePhone up a little bit and tapped out another message one-handed.
// Yea . . . if it's not a lot of trouble. I mean, if you need to stay with her, it's okay //
After all, Yaya was his ghoulfriend. He would be all right alone . . . just like he always had been. Maybe. Jacking hell.
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Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2011 9:13 pm
Pursing his lips faintly, the nergal could read into the text almost instantly. Aksaja truly didn't like asking for this sort of support, but the dragon boil was rather blatantly indicating that he would like company, even if he didn't think that he was doing so. Smiling faintly, a rather sympathetic expression, Sharra quickly thumbed a reply.
// It's not. I'll leave her a note. Be right over. //
And backtracking in order to jot a quick sentence or two on a piece of paper, he left it on the bedside table, before tiptoeing out and shutting the door behind him. It wasn't a long walk over to Aksaja's dorm, and Sharra was light on his feet...the way night hung about Amityville's campus was familiar, and didn't at all call up the terrifying images that had faced them on the island. It was strangely welcoming, after all they'd been through...the only thing that might possibly have been more comforting yet was to have Yaya on his arm, and mayhap a cup of his aunts' Peppermonster tea.
Arriving at the other boil's door not ten minutes from that last text, Sharra was barefoot, just in a pair of loose pants and an unbuttoned shirt. But then, this was an impromptu midnight meeting, and the nergal had been through far too much in the past days to give a damn.
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Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2011 9:34 pm
Aksaja let out a breath he hadn't been aware that he was holding then, and slowly put his phone down to wait on Sharra. A part of him did indeed realize exactly what he was doing, and hated sounding so . . . whiney. But most of him simply didn't care at this point. He didn't want to be alone.
Once he heard the Nergal boil outside of his door (because no, he totally hadn't been straining to hear that . . . okay, so he had), Aksaja padded over to let the other in. He attempted to offer the other a smile, but it just sort of looked sickly at this point. The dragon's eyes looked a bit sunken, and had one been able to see them past the lightning-bolt markings, there were dark circles beneath them. "Hey. I . . . didn't mean to wake you up," he murmured as he stepped back so Sharra could join him.
Most of the room looked like something of a disaster, the product of leaving his minipets alone in here for so long. The pile of cushions and blankets Aksaja had been sleeping on was still a bit damp with sweat, and one pillow was crumpled into an almost unrecognizable shape from his clutching at it so hard.
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Posted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 11:30 pm
Combing claws through blond hair, he took a look around the other boil's shoulder, smiling wanly at the dragon. "Don't feel bad. Sleeping isn't exactly my strong suit at the moment." There was a mirthless laugh at that, at he joined his friend inside the room. Yeah, from the state of things, it was clear that his mind had been about as at ease as Sharra's own. Though admittedly, Yaya had made the initial shock of it all ever so much easier to bear.
Leaning against the wall just inside the dragon's dorm room, he closed his eyes for a long moment, allowing himself a lengthy exhale, calming his own torrential downpour of emotions. The nergal wasn't here for himself. "Looks like none of us find cleaning therapeutic." A mild try at a joke, "My spot's an utter wreck. Herbert threw a temper tantrum while I was gone." The freymon was always, without exception, inconsolable. Mostly because he blamed his hapless owner for the distinct lack of Yaya in his life.
A pause, a few seconds to let his pathetic endeavor at lightening the mood die a slow, painful death before he spoke again. "So I'd ask you what's on your mind, but...I think I know the answer, or at least the general one, but...like it was for me, I'm guessing it's more personal than that." The fog had touched them in places that none of the students were comfortable discussing in public. The voices had known things, things they truly shouldn't have, played upon weaknesses that the Halloweeners would never have divulged save under duress.
It had left Sharra feeling empty.
"Like...I wish...I would stop looking down to make sure I'm still corporeal. Sometimes...sometimes I still feel dead." It was a confession, human hand shoved deep into his pocket, as he started out this awkward heart-to-heart. This...this was something he didn't even feel comfortable talking to Yaya about. He needed to be stronger than that. To protect her. To be there for her.
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Posted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 11:46 pm
Aksaja shut the door after the nergal boil came inside, wincing just slightly as Sharra made a comment about cleaning. He intended to at least straighten things up a bit . . . later. But for now, he hadn't had the chance to do so before passing out earlier. Still, he tried to put a brave front on it. "I've got so many damn pets it's impossible to keep this place clean anyway. I should probably get a petsitter or something."
Then he, too, paused and allowed the silence to lengthen a bit, until the nergal spoke again. This was awkward for him, still not really used to having people to depend upon. When Sharra mentioned feeling dead sometimes, the lightning dragon winced. He wasn't sure anymore who had had the better deal in the situation. Those who had "died" or the ones left behind. No one, he suspected. "I wish . . . that I could have somehow saved you. All of you," he murmured, gaze pained as the guilt welled up again.
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Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2012 12:02 am
"Heh. Petsitters probably cost more than they're worth. I need to attend some of those Minipet handling classes or some other crazy thing like that. Perhaps they can teach them to mind, or for me to teach them how to mind. I don't know." A shrug, as he then dismissed the topic for good, biting the proverbial dust.
The nergal boil wasn't precisely familiar with the whole dependable friend aspect of this either, having been rather stereotypical, being a demon youngling, he had never opened up to his aunts, the 'mothers' who had raised him since he'd been naught but a tiny, wide-eyed, sharp-spined babe. Last of the bloodline and all that rot. Heh.
A mirthless smile caught his lips, "Hey, there wasn't a jack-damned thing you could have done. We all tried our best, I think. And I know how you feel, I do...I keep...guessing, second-guessing, going back over what happened to replay it again and again. If there had been another way, if we could go back, would our choices really have been any different? We acted in ways that were true to ourselves. I wish I could have spared my friends pain." His voice sounded hollow then, almost grieved for the events of past days. "It seems like every time, every damn time we set out to do something good, it all goes to rot. I don't honestly know if that has a thing to do with us. Which on the flip side, means we're pretty helpless." So they had no choice, but to keep existing, pressing forward. "But we can't go back, and I wouldn't want to, not even for a chance to succeed, to save my friends, to avoid...to avoid dying."
He was too afraid to live that again, words he inwardly swore he would never speak aloud. Not to anyone.
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Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2012 12:23 am
Aksaja nodded at the nergal's words, eyes lidding. He couldn't even conceive of going back and doing it all over again. The very thought made him shiver. "Yea . . . going back is not a thing that I'd want to do, ever." In point of fact, if he ever saw fog again, he'd be more likely to run screaming than anything else. Still. "I'm sorry," he blurted out suddenly. "Even though . . . even though I know that it's not . . . really my fault." The words were hesitant, as if even he wasn't sure he should be apologizing. Or if it would mean anything at this point.
Sharra was right in at least one, thing, though. Everything they tried to do right ended up going wrong.
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Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2012 12:47 am
He returned the dragon's words with a wry smile, shaking his head, "Don't worry, Aksaja, I know if you had been able to do something, you would have. You're like that, and it's not a bad thing. Just don't forget to look after yourself too, a'right?" With a gesture, he then folded arms loosely across his midsection, glancing down in an almost abashed fashion. "I was really damn worried about you back there..." Just a whisper, green eyes flickering up through blond bangs.
"...and we're friends, yanno?" Shakily regaining mental ground, he straightened from his slumped place against the wall. "So if you need anything, like tonight, just send me a note."
Speaking of... "What else is bothering you? Sounds like you've had a rough night so far. Not that I expect any of us to have the most tranquil of evenings." He had to mentally force himself to keep his gaze from tracking over to the obviously hastily abandoned sleeping spot that Aksaja had in his room. The nergal boil was damnedly familiar with nightmares himself, thank you just the same. It wasn't hard to pinpoint such blatant signs.
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Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2012 12:54 am
Aksaja nodded at that, and made a silent vow to himself to train harder if he got the chance . . . so that he could try to better protect his friends. He had only just found them, and he didn't want to lose them so quickly. "Yea. We're friends," he replied, an odd sort of wonder in his tone. The first real friends he'd ever had. "And I will."
Then he froze slightly when Sharra asked what else was bothering him, noticing the flick of green eyes toward his little 'nest' over there. He hesitated a moment, then simply told the truth. "Nightmares. About the island and . . . about . . . my father. That's who I kept on seeing, there. In the fog. He hates me." The last part was very nearly whispered, as a slight shiver ran through his frame. Some part of him knew that that assertion was based upon what the fog had done to him. But it was a suspicion that he'd privately held for a long time, anyway. So recent events just made it seem all the more certain.
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Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2012 1:10 am
There was a tiny wince at that, sympathetic with the dragon. Admittedly, Sharra had always taken his only living and unestranged relations for granted, even finding them a nuisance at times. It seemed rather alien to put himself in another's shoes, in a place where one's parental figures weren't doting and overbearing. "Nightmares I get...our adventure was a living nightmare. I can't say...that I completely understand, but family...family is tough." Jack help him, if the nergal boil hadn't had the love and support of his aunts, he honestly wasn't at all sure what would have become of him.
Giving his draconic friend a wan smile, hoping to reassure him somewhat, Sharra continued, "The fog played on our worsts...mental, emotional, physical. Whatever we question and fear most in our lives. I don't know what kind of person your father is, but...I was alongside you on the island, and Aksaja, if your father hates you, then I gotta wonder if he knows you very well. Because you have admirable traits, and a lot of them. You're brave. Jack-dammit all, braver than I am, most times. Whatever he's like, and whatever he means to you, don't let him make you question who you are. Because...I do know you. I'm your friend, you said that yourself. And I'm proud that I am. I think without you I'd have snapped somewhere back there." Partly because of the dragon's support, but also partly because Sharra had wanted to look out for the other, protect his comrade.
"We'll be stronger for this....I...I keep telling myself that. My mind knows that, even if the rest of me keeps on wanting to run away like a little ghoul." A soft jest, his best effort, weak though it was. It seemed so hypocritical, handing out advice that the demon couldn't even follow on his own.
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Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2012 9:28 pm
Yes, saying that his family was "tough" was definitely one way to put it. His mother seemed to generally like him more but he could tell that she was disappointed in him in some ways as well. She didn't understand him and likely just wished that he and his father could get along and cease butting heads all the time. The dragon had no idea what Sharra's family was like, but at least it sounded as if the nergal boil didn't have as much trouble with them.
He nodded slightly at the other's words about the fog, shivering slightly with the memories. Then Sharra's words drew him in and he found himself listening with almost fascination. The nergal boil actually thought that he was brave . . . ? Capable? He didn't even think that about himself. "I . . . thank you, Sharra. But I'm not. Not really. I mean. I was probably as afraid as you were, back there." It was fairly clear that he didn't exactly know how to deal with true praise and someone being proud of him, rather than pointing out his faults or how he could improve. Hopefully the other was right about the experience making them stronger, though.
Being stronger would be nice. So that nothing like that could ever happen again. Or if it did, they could fight it off. Together.
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Posted: Sun Sep 30, 2012 1:45 am
"You weren't." Sharra smiled thinly, "You really weren't. I've never been so afraid...as when I was dead. I realized, I was dead...and I was just...just floating out there. No body, nothing....I'd become part of the fog, of its emptiness, as though the life had been sapped from everything everywhere. Not just me, but...existence. I...I don't know if I'm all here now, my body anyway, my mind certainly lost a chip or two off it." He laughed, the sound hollow, the beating of his heart the only thing to assuage the distant tremors of remembered panic.
"But...we did make it. We're here, no matter the doubts of insanity. This damn idiotic spell that it's cast on all of us, it'll pass, we'll be all right again someday. It might take time, but...things will get sussed." Put a brave face on it, Sharra Eldwaithe. "We've got bigger and better things in our future, Aksaja. That's what we need to believe in."
Because if the nergal didn't believe in such things, didn't have faith in his existence, in a future, a future where there was warmth and clarity, where there was he and Yaya and all the others that he cared for...well then he really would lose the rest of himself, sanity tossed to the winds. Not that he'd blame his marbles if they all rolled off, he imagined they were damned tired of being treated this way.
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Posted: Sun Sep 30, 2012 9:27 pm
Aksaja shivered at those words, at the description of being dead. Honestly, he hadn't felt much better about the situation. Knowing that everyone he called 'friend' was gone had been . . . almost as if he died himself. But he hadn't, and he didn't intend to. Nodding just slightly, he watched the nergal as Sharra kept talking, trying to reassure him when the other obviously felt as bad or worse.
And suddenly he felt like something of an a*****e for still doubting when his friend was trying so hard to give him back his confidence. From somewhere, the lightning dragon summoned a smile and nodded again, more firmly. "All right. Okay, I hear you . . . I'm sorry. I just hope that we don't have to go through anything like that ever again." Of course, he already had the sinking feeling that that wouldn't be the case. But he had to make himself believe, at least for the moment, that it was over.
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