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"You know I'm always hungry." Godfrey didn't want to admit it, but it felt sort of odd for them to be like this, lightly holding hands and actually going on a date. A mixture of Josh's new responsibilities and Godfrey's renewed fervor for studying left them without much time for each other. Granted, it was a lot easier to study without Josh, there weren't as many distractions that made him eager to run around outside instead of staying cooped up with a book, not so many distractions in the form of needy touchings and couplings, not so many distractions in needing to make sure to help Josh with homework as well, so the other boy wouldn't fall behind.

Distractions he had never minded, but without them it was certainly much easier to study, as well as get back to some of his other neglected hobbies. He found himself mostly secluded in the library except when some sort of family outing or scheduled Josh time came into play. And it left him a lot of time to think and realize that besides Josh and Voldemort, he didn't really have any other friends. At least, not any that really knew him beyond an acquaintance or casual study partner.

And while all he had to talk about these days was books and magic, all Josh seemed to talk about was music and the band. He had listened to more new bands than ever and Josh was always practicing. He loved to watch Josh play and hear him sing, but got rather tired of him talking about all the people in the loft, especially Reg. He didn't go spouting off constantly how awesome and knowledgeable Voldemort was, did he? He understood Josh was excited and how well known Reg was and how big this all was. He understood Voldemort wasn't someone he could gush about in public, if he even wanted to. But he missed all the fun things they used to do like running around and being goofy and just having fun without thinking of something else.

So today they were on a date which Godfrey was enjoying, but the only downside was he couldn't exactly divest himself of his clothes in public and jump Josh if the need arose in order to get a definite change of subject. Hopefully today it would just be the two of them, no school, no band, no anything. He was missing Josh, missing his friend.

Godfrey selected a turkey and swiss sandwich on rye, grabbing a pepsi as well because it seemed as if it would go very well with the sandwich despite the fact he didn't drink soda very often. It tasted cold and sweet and bubbly against his tongue as he took a sip, but the cup was sweaty and too large for his hands, and with the sandwich together he barely made it to the table after Josh.

"Whew...." He plopped down on the chair, pulling away the plastic wrapping from the bread. He had to use both hands for the sandwich, which pleased him immensely, and took a tremendous bite.

He chewed ravenously, taking a sip or two of soda to help the sandwich go down. He gave a happy sigh after swallowing, staring appreciatively at the sandwich.

"This place is definitely fantastic." Godfrey agreed, taking a smaller bite of his lunch. He swung his feet lightly, having to tilt his toes up he could do so, but they still irregularly caught the pavement. It was a really fantastic day and he knew they definitely should use up all of it to their advantage. Maybe they could go play pranks in shops after lunch, or just run about looking at things. Maybe Godfrey could even entice Josh to a game of tag along the sidewalk. It would annoy the other people who happened to be using the sidewalk, but it would still be great fun. Piggyback rides were definitely an option, and making faces at tourists. There were so many things you could do in the city, Godfrey definitely never got enough of it.

Godfrey paused, teeth sunk halfway into another bite. He regarded Josh silently, chewing slowly for a few long moments.

"Okay." He replied, waving a hand for Josh to go on. He had a feeling it was better to think nothing, to say nothing until Josh said what he needed to say. Godfrey took a long sip of soda, his blue eyes watchful and intense.

Godfrey kept eating while Josh talked. Truthfully, it wasn't unexpected. They hadn't been doing much in the way of being a couple, besides coupling, and he saw how keeping up the pretenses was being a burden. They both had too much to do to worry about if the other was feeling neglected or not. But Godfrey could care less if Josh took him on dates that were all planned out and date like. All he missed was getting to hang out with his friend, and being together was giving them more reason than anything else lately. Or at least giving Josh a reason. Godfrey didn't feel like he was always sitting and pining for Josh, but there were decided times when he felt lonely and wished his best friend was there instead of musty tomes or goats.

"....okay." Godfrey repeated, but knew he needed to respond somehow. Even though he told himself they weren't much like a couple anymore anyways, it still hurt a bit.

"I...well, I've been missing you.... hanging out with you, just the two of us, but.... I didn't really mind you popping over for sex. I really, really like sex Josh so you never had to worry about doing much else."

He took another long drink and set down his sandwich. "I mean.... I have been thinking a lot too.... I guess there's worse ways to break up with someone. Worse reasons."

He wasn't smiling, couldn't quite. He almost didn't know what to think. Maybe all the books he had been reading were thinking for him, making words.

Godfrey stood and scooted his chair next to Josh's. He climbed back up onto it, sitting on his shin with one leg dangling down.

He put an arm around Josh's shoulder, frowning. Why wasn't he upset when Josh was clearly so? Maybe because he didn't feel as if they wouldn't still be close. Josh loved him, said he would always, and that made him feel warm and reassured.

"I know the band is important Josh." He laid his head on Josh's shoulder. "But we're still best friends, aren't we?"

It wasn't hard to understand. Josh was just starting off with this and it could make his career. This was the time that would decide how Josh's life was going to go.

"I know you don't want to mess things up and we haven't been seeing each other that much anyways, but don't be dumb and think we have to stop beimg friends because of it. I'm not going to die if I don't see you for a month-"

He paused, something suddenly snapping into place. He pulled away from Josh, giving him an odd, mostly confused look.

"You're not coming back to school." The realization hit him harder than.anything. Different paths.....Josh wanting to concentrate on the band. And.he couldn't wrap his mind around it.

"But.....but how can you not want to keep learning magic? And your O.W.L.S! If you at least took your O.W.L.S you could get a job if you ever needed to!" He wasn't yelling but his tone of voice was highly incredulous. How could anyone ever want to stop learning magic? Godfrey had waited and waited for his own chance to start, and even if he had been near squib level magic he would have kept going to get his O.W.L.S if it killed him. He couldn't understand how Josh would want to give something as wonderful as magic up.

And he let out a small sound, an almost cry or whimper, when he suddenly realized what it was going to be like without Josh at Hogwarts. No Josh to eat lunch with, go to classes with, hang out and play with, to study with, to sleep with, to share everything with, even his deepest and most guarded secret. His ears laid back limply against his hair, invisible to those without magic, and his tail had curled itself around his waist and encroached onto Josh's lap. Some time alone so Josh could learn songs and assimilate to band life, he understood. But months and months and giving up magic? And he suddenly wondered if Josh even wanted to be friends at all anymore.

"I get that you want time to concentrate and I don't understand about school because I could never.... but you still want to be friends, don't you Josh?" He moved forward again at that question, putting his hand on Josh's leg and moving forward, before suddenly feeling as if the other boy might need space and backing up again. "I love you Josh and you can come over if you ever need to and I'll leave you alone for a few weeks or...or more if you need but tell me you still want to be friends, don't tell me you don't ever want to see me again!"

Whatever conclusions Godfrey had decided to draw, for whatever reason, tears were now visible in the corners of his eyes and he was wringing his tail to dampen the urge to touch Josh, as if doing so would keep him from disappearing. Staying away for a while he could handle, being without him at school would be hard. He wanted the best for Josh and wanted him to have everything he dreamed for himself. But if Josh wanted him to go away completely? Until sometime, maybe years later in the future when Josh wanted to be around him again? That he didn't think he could handle, not a complete loss of the closest person to him in his life.

Godfrey wrapped his arms around Josh's shoulders, pulling the taller boy close. His initial panicked thoughts were somewhat sated, even though the feelings lingered, ebbing away slowly. Josh didn't want to go away forever, he only needed time to start his career. Godfrey didn't think he would ever understand how Josh felt like he didn't need magic, but then again Josh had never known until he was older and Godfrey had been waiting all his life.

"As long as you still want to be friends, that's all.... I was worried....." Godfrey buried his face against Josh's hair, not crying but taking deep breaths to stave the emotion. "I just want what's best for you, I'll be fine. I just want you to be happy."

He sniffed quietly, turning his head slightly to look down at Josh. Even as he knew he had to, wanted to let him go, he held Josh tighter. Just for a little while longer.

"I'll text you, and come to all your shows. " Godfrey snuggled closer, as close as he could without leaving his own chair. He had a feeling it would be a while before he and Josh could sit like this, so close but in friendly companionship.

"And I'll try really hard not to blow up any of your new fangirls.....and you should make t-shirts so I can buy them all up and wear them to school." Godfrey breathed in Josh's smell, the strongest scent being his hawk gel. "And maybe I'll even put all my hair in a hawk and use tubs and tubs of gel to make it stay, not even any magic. And I can send you cookies and things you can share with everyone."

Godfrey settled down more comfortably against Josh as he talked, loosening his grip. "And if you ever need anything you only have to ask."