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Posted: Sun Nov 14, 2010 8:39 am
As day broke and night departed,
you left my side forever.
My mind could not understand,
my heart refused to acknowledge,
Forever…
Forever‘s the rest of my life,
never will I see you smile again;
never will I hear your voice,
never will I kiss your forehead as I leave your house.
Only one year ago…
the beginning of forever…
And yet, it feels like never…
If I arrive at your house, will you still be sitting there?
If I wait long enough, will you call me on the phone?
If I walk into your room, will the echo of your voice linger there?
Forever…
Forever, you will be here,
Forever, within my soul,
And as long as I see you in my dreams,
Forever, never will come…
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Posted: Sun Nov 14, 2010 10:36 am
Aw, I love it<3 very sad and creative. I am sorry for your lost... :c
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Posted: Sun Nov 14, 2010 11:26 am
This is very beautiful and sad. I admire it very much. The only suggestion I have is to maybe switch two words in the last line, never and will...or maybe lose the comma and leave the two words alone...Anyway good job and I am sorry for your loss.
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Posted: Sun Nov 14, 2010 11:41 am
This is a very sad poem with great voice. The words that you use really show emotion, and make the reader connect. I like this poem. smile
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Posted: Mon Nov 15, 2010 8:30 pm
This is so sad in such a beautiful way. I'm very sorry for your loss. But on the plus side, you did a really great job. This poem can really stir up people's emotions. heart
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