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Posted: Thu Mar 18, 2010 3:46 pm
The auburn femme sat outside her shared den with her that she shared with her mate Gaara, the last while had growing more and more strained between them as they tried over and over for a litter with no luck. It was starting to make Kearith wonder if she was even capable. Had her mind been strong enough at pushing away the consideration of them for so long with no sense in the need or want with no mate that she had forced herself barren?
If so, what would Gaara do? Would he leave her in search of another female who could give him a litter? The mere thought made her shiver. She wasn't sure whether to be more mad at herself or her mate, or maybe fate just wouldn't allow them a litter. She could see the disappointment in Gaara's face more and more as time went by. It was starting to distress her even, never before had she truly wanted a litter, but now she was so desperate she wasn't sure what to do with herself.
With a slight whine she laid herself down on the grass and looked up to the bright blue sky above. Spring was in bloom in full and here she was, just sitting and waiting for something more. Waiting for some sort of sign that would answer their prayers and hopes.
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Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 3:35 pm
Who knew whose fault it was. For all he knew, it could be him. Was he growing to be too old to bare more pups? Were his first children, the ones his mate took with her, going to be his only offspring? Did this make him a bad alpha..? Because he couldn't expand his family line?
Shaking himself off as he stood up, Gaara trudged out of the den, ducking his head down--only to almost trip over Kearith, having expected her to run off and do her usual thing that she liked to do. But they'd both been pretty...upset about this litter thing, too. Did she blame him, too?
Slowly, almost hesitantly, he made his way around her to her side, seating himself as she stared at the sky. Leaning his head down to lightly lick at her head, he nibbled at some of the fur above her eyes before lying himself down beside her, a small smile crossing his lips. He didn't know what to say...or what to do. He wasn't mad at her, but he didn't know if he should be mad at himself or not. It was all so frustrating.
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Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 3:58 pm
Closing her eyes as Gaara loved on her she buries her maw under her paws and sighed heavily. It hurt to see him sometimes, knowing she still wasn't carrying a litter. Never before had she wanted a litter, she'd never even thought of having a family and now besides filling their home with other wolves she only other thing she wanted wasn't coming to fruition either. Couldn't she just have one damned thing, just one?
"Why Gaara?" she whined looking up at him with her golden eyes pitifully. "Our home is empty but us, there has been no sight of other wolves or even the slightest scent and we can't even have a litter it seems. Do the Gods above aspire against us?" she whined and clenched her eyes shut again. It did seem that way, as though punishment for leaving the other pack. But neither of them had been happy, so what was the point is they weren't happy there.
Was happiness just too much to ask? It must have been, having each other was a wonderful thing, but still, a family, others, it was starting to seem more and more like an impossibility as the days crept by.
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Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 4:05 pm
So it was bothering her quite a bit. A quiet sigh escaped him, and he slowly laid his head down beside her own, nudging her muzzle with his own while he brought a large paw up to brush her own off of her nose.
"They will come," both other wolves and pups, of course. They always came...he and his previous mate hadn't even expected pups and they had just come when the time was right, when food was plentiful and when there was protection for them. "The gods are waiting for the time to be right...they know more than we do," he had never been into that sort of thing, but her talk on it had rubbed off on him over the extended amount of time they'd been together. He rolled onto his side, draping one of his long legs over her back while he groomed her cheek, bright eyes looking up to her in a reassuring manner.
"Plus--who knows. More wolves might be coming through, and we wouldn't want you pregnant if these wolves weren't friendly," not that he wouldn't protect her. He'd rip whoever it was apart that dared to threaten his mate, no matter what they were...two-legger, wolf, bear, whatever. It didn't matter.
"So dont be so down. They'll come," he repeated.
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Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 6:52 pm
Nodding she smiled slightly at Gaara as her forced her paws away from her face and she peaked a gold eye at him. He was right of course and she knew it. Everything always happened within time, only when the time was right would everything fall into place just as it was all supposed to be. But the waiting was starting eat her from the inside out.
"I know.." she whined. "It's just the waiting, it goes on and on. I start to wonder if it'll ever come, others, pups, anything at all or whether we'll be out here just the two of us for the rest of our lives. I mean you can't say you haven't thought of it." she huffed, but accepted Gaara's grooming. She could never be mad at him, she knew he felt her pain, all to well, if not more.
"I'm sorry. I'm taking this all just too personally, I just can't help thinking it all my fault. That maybe I can't have pups, I've spent so long not caring about a litter that I'm barren." she growled low in her throat. She wanted to please Gaara, she's do anything in the world for him, but it seemed the one thing she truly wanted to give him just constantly eluded her grasp. But there was time, there was still time, she hoped.
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Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 2:16 pm
Gaara smiled a bit at her pessimistic attitude. That's how he had been a while back...now he tried to be more positive, more...accepting of fate. Fate had dealt him so many painful blows in the past, this was to ease that pain that had been given to him.
Now, he just had to trust that his pain was gone--that he wasn't meant for it anymore. So he'd hope.
"If we're alone...then we're at least together. I wouldn't mind that," he said blatantly, nudging her muzzle with his own, "If we weren't meant to have a family, then we'll find pups that dont have a family...I know of a wolf who used to adopt pups into her life because she was alone. When I was a pup, I was accepted into a family and raised up when I thought I would be all alone. It'll work out," he grinned, not sure where all of this was coming from.
"If you cant have pups..I'll stay with you. Dont worry," he murmured, lifting his head up to look over the river just in front of them, "Life has a way of making up for things, I've come to notice."
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Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 4:24 pm
Kearith smiled up at him, unable to feel so bad after his speech, she had never know that about his passed. She had grown up with her family, with her brother, oh how she must have hurt her parents when she left to explore the rest of the world that they lived in while their pack was on the verge of falling apart.
She had lived a fairly easy life, even after she had left her pack things had not been exactly hard for her, but now, she had trouble with the idea of being denied something she longed for. Now she'd never been pampered she'd been raised with a damn good worth ethic and knew how to pull her weight around.
But she was comforted knowing Gaara wouldn't leave her if it came down to them being unable to have a litter. She didn't know what she would do after having fallen in love with rough and tough male. Since their meeting he had become softer and more open, at least with her and she liked it. He was a good mate and would eventually be a wonderful Alpha. "I believe you...I'm sorry I got myself so worked up Love." she sighed laying her head over his paws and looking out to the water as well. The sound of the water was quite calming. They had picked the perfect place to call home.
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Posted: Wed Mar 24, 2010 12:34 pm
"Dont apologize," he smiled a bit and nudged her ear with his nose, licking her head afterwards while her head was rested on his paws. Looking out and over their territory once more, he sighed and gently rested his head down against her neck and shoulders, not wanting to put too much weight on her neck.
"Something will happen," he reassured, closing his eyes after a moment. "I can feel it...something will come to us and show us what we're supposed to do," whether it be wolves, war, storms or game--something was going to tell them what direction to go in. It would happen, he knew it, and from what he could see and feel, it would be something good. Something they deserved for their hard work, that they could look at and be proud of.
In his mind, they'd have a strong pack...a family oriented one that would keep the members close and ready to fight, or die, for one another. They already had themselves, which he knew he'd die for his mate...and he had a feeling she would do the same. They just had to be patient.
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Posted: Wed Mar 24, 2010 2:25 pm
Her ear flicked faintly, he was right, he was always right and she knew it. Well at least when it came to these sorts of things..sometimes she knew better than him, but what kind of relationship would that be if they didn't take turns being right about different things from time to time. The smile stayed on her maw, comfortable where she lay, his head draped over her neck. She could have laid like this forever and been happy.
"I know, waiting is just a pain-staking thing. It makes one agitated at times and it just got the best of me. It's not easy waiting for something you want so badly, especially when it's not just something that will please one, but others as well, something so life changing and meaningful." she sighed and wiggled a big, until her hind legs were splayed out a little more and she was more relaxed in the position. If he could feel it and so could she then the winds would for sure soon turn in their favor, bringing others to them and soon a family of their own, a bloodline all theirs that would hopefully continue on for a good long time.
But oh what a pack they would have, a great one, filled with wolves that would be so much like on big connected family, even if not by blood, but by care for one another, respect, and a calling so similar to be apart of something bigger, something stronger, a rebirth of what a pack truly should be.
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Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2010 9:25 pm
When she seemed to relax more, he smiled and closed his eyes, trying to do the same. He spoke positively--but he was still a little weary about his own words. He didn't know where they were all coming from.
Releasing a heavy sigh, he tilted his head and licked softly at one of her ears, his tail wagging unconsciously while he thought about their pack...even if they didn't have a bunch of wolves, it'd still be nice to have pups. Theirs or not, he just...wanted something like he used to have, but nothing like it at all. He wanted it to be just his and Kearith's life, not what he used to deal with.
Giving another light sigh, he opened his bright eyes and lifted his head up, looking towards the water once more. "Maybe we should hunt," he breathed, looking down to her with a grin, "Get a big fat coon~ Or...something," he was a big male, okay? he liked eating as much as the next wolf, too.
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Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2010 9:55 pm
Her ear flickered again with the licking, she didn't know why it always did that, reflex was the best answer she could come up with the explain the odd movement every time he licked her ears. But it was nothing more than a blatant curiosity about some of the most random and overlooked things in ones life.
A pack, a created family, a community in which they would lead. It was a lot of responsibility, but it was something she was sure the two of them would very much be able to handle the pressure of such a large undertaking. But first they needed other, but if Gaara said they would come then she had her faith in him and nothing would shake that trust she held with him.
Lifting herself up slowly she nodded, food sounded good and it had been a good while since she'd had a coon. They had never been easy bastards to catch, unlike most smaller critters that roamed the forest the 'coons were a fair bit smarter. "Sounds like a good idea to me. A good fat coon sounds wonderful." she yawned, her tongue curling as she did so.
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Posted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 7:03 pm
Humming in agreement, he slowly moved to stand, stretching out his back and shaking off afterwards. Licking his maw, he made his way towards the river, pausing to see if she would follow.
Glancing back at her, he smiled and padded down to the shore, leaning down to get a quick drink before they were supposed to head out.
He was..optimistic about this. He wanted to have a pack, a family and a territory that they could prosper in. But, if it turned out to not be that way..he still had his mate, he still had a chunk of land. And he'd protect them both with his life.
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Posted: Wed Mar 31, 2010 10:37 am
Following suit Kear got up and stretched herself, feeling the joints in her back and legs pop slightly. It was a good feeling, though odd at the same time. She trotted after Gaara still in a better mood and it was really beginning to improve as the reached the water.
She watched Gaara lean over to drink from the cool running water and she backed herself up and lunged into the ice depths, making a fairly large splash. The cool water seeping through her fur was a wonderful cool down to the hot day, immediately bringing her even more to life even though her coat was heavy with water.
"Come on Gaara, is feels wonderful in here." she yipped, paddling about in the depths. Most of the small rive was fairly shallow, but there were a few sections that ran quite deep, enough for even a large wolf like Gaara to swim in.
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Posted: Thu Apr 01, 2010 11:18 pm
Snorting a bit when the female leaped into the water, he shook himself off and blinked, his head now wet from where she had splashed him.
"I'll pass," he laughed, wading into the shallower area to sit. It barely reached his ankles, which was fine with him--he'd never been very fond of water, and had always been more attached to dry land over anything else. Even as a pup.
Gaara was glad to see her getting into a better mood, alive with energy again..he hated seeing her down and upset.
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Posted: Fri Apr 02, 2010 5:10 pm
Splashing up to Gaara, grinning and her tail hanging low with the weight of the water that saturated her thick pelt. Licking her mate's nose, she stood back a few small steps and shook herself, making sure she threw as much water as she could on Gaara because chuckling and darting off towards the thick woods, and the hunt of was on for dinner.
A fat coon indeed would make a wonderful meal, one that would take them into the next day or until they decided to hunt again since wolves often did not need to hunt constantly, as long as they had fresh water they could go quite some time, but when game was fairly available they would hunt to their hearts content.
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