Welcome to Gaia! ::

He could remember everything vividly, and it was once more that the god of Karma found himself wishing he could simply erase his memories, forget everything. He wondered if this was what had happened before... if that was why he could not remember past waking up one day with a purpose and a job, but no real memories to call his own. Had he given them up willingly like he would have at that very instant if asked?

Perhaps so.

Whatever the reason he'd decided long ago that lurking int the past was not for him and he'd let go of that which he did not recall. Now, he wished he could let go of what he could recall; there'd been blood. A lot of blood. And when he'd gotten to the scene it was too late; much to late to do anything for her. She'd died while he'd looked on, and he couldn't even force himself to seek out the perpetrators because they hadn't done it out of bad will. Those hyenas had been defending their territory and their young ones from what they thought was a threat.

He'd not been able to move on - possibly because time flew differently for gods than it did for mortals. A week was but a breath for a god, and thus, he'd stayed withing the land where she'd died, content with performing his job only when he felt the tug to do so. When he did, he teleported where he was needed, but found himself returning to that one cave... that one spot, time and time again. Like now; he'd returned just hours before and had settled himself down on the ground, reclining his large form against the side of the den, his eyes closed as he tried in vain not to remember.

When the goddess' frame blocked the light from outside, Samsara frowned; he'd had half a mind of telling her off for barging in, announced so rudely when something clicked inside his head. The voice was off. The looks were also mildly off; it was Timmain.... and yet it wasn't. To say Samsara was confused was an understatement at that precise moment, "Yes?" he sounded confused, and was doing a poor job at hiding it.

Of course, in his defense, the idea that it might be Kairi had never even entered his mind. As far as he was concerned, maybe Tim was drunk. Or had a cold - he had absolutely no idea what it was that was 'off' with her.... but it wasn't just the voice. The face, the mask, everything-

Okay then, the grinning was horribly out of character, and for some odd reason made him feel like the creature before him was horribly familiar. Either that, or disturbingly Cheshire-catish. He was going to go with the former though. Her proclamation didn't give him a lot of hints; me? Who was 'me'? He knew a lot of "me's". It was only when she spoke his name that he frowned, tilted his head, squinted.... and tilted his head the other way for good measure.

It couldn't be. It just... he'd seen her die and her being in that form meant that Tim was now... "Kairi?" but no, it couldn't be, could it? "Where's Timmain? If you're not her, does that mean-" he was having trouble trying to process thought - it means having to replace 'dead Kairi' with 'dead friend' and he wasn't too sure how to feel or react. He was both relieved as all hell and mourning his aunt and it showed on his features even as he stood up, even if he did not advance towards her, unsure if he could, or should not.

Took her place?

That meant that Timmain was no longer with them. The thoughts were a lot of process but despite himself, he found he didn't quite care (Tim could take care of herself and had never needed guidance - if she felt she needed to do this, it was for a reason) and pushed himself towards her, one step at a time. It was almost as if he expected her to vanish into thin air as he advanced.

At that precise moment, Samsara wouldn't have been able to tell right from wrong, or proper from improper. He was much too busy feeling an immense wave of relief (accompanied by pangs of mourning for his dearly departed friend), "I stayed here," maybe he shouldn't have told her her - later on, he'd probably kick himself for the slip; telling her he hadn't even moved from the place they'd been inhabiting felt.... stupid, and perhaps more revealing than he had any reason to be at that moment. His words had come in a bit of a whisper and were interrupted by the way she burrowed her face into his mane.

His hesitation lasted only a few more seconds before he leaned in and wrapped his neck around her as best he could; he really had missed her, and it showed, "I'm so sorry I couldn't... I got there too late. I'm so sorry."

"I waited," he'd considered rectifying, telling her something else, anything to through her off his case, but found he simply didn't have the heart to. If anything, he owed her quite a bit of honesty, though now did not seem to be the time or place. He frowned again as she spoke, his ears flattening back against his skull as he clicked his tongue over his teeth, "Not fast enough," he murmured, and for a moment, just a fleeting moment, he allowed himself to hold her against him tightly, almost as if fearing something might take her away.

However, as the moment passed, and he pondered he might have worn his welcome, he began to pull away. Still he maintained himself rather close though, pulling out only just enough so he could inspect her. He was unsure what he was looking for; scars? Did they carry over? He couldn't recall much of anything; as far as he was aware, he might've been a reborn mortal once... though he didn't really feel like he was.

A sigh finally escaped him and he hunched over, as he he'd let go of a weight he'd been carrying for quite a long while now, "I'm glad you've come back," for now, it was all he dared himself to say.

He let out a sigh and nodded at her mildly, "A little," which probably meant... very little sleep, if any at all, really, specially given the fact Gods usually didn't NEED to sleep. Samsara found it comfortable to indulge in it, but lately, he'd been spending the nights up, awake, pondering and remembering.

It was a new concept for him. At least... fairly new, in his mind. After all, since there was very little he remembered aside his time with Kairi, that was all he had to look back upon at night - it was perplexing for him, "I'm fine though, don't worry," he offered her a smile, albeit a tired one, "I'll be fine - but that's not important," a frown followed, "Are YOU fine?" he used one of his wings to draw her closer, directing her towards the end of the den, where it was clear he planned on laying down with her, "Where, pray tell, have you been?"