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 Posted: Wed Jan 27, 2010 8:45 am
So a childhood friend of my mothers passed away this last Saturday. She was 53..and up until a few years ago in decent health (maybe a little overweight but so is a majority of her family). She suffered some severe brain damage and it's been a hard year for my mom to watch her friend in this condition, as well for this womans family, who'm I grew up with.
Later that same night after we had heard about this, my childhood friend calls me up and tell me that his mother has been taken into a home, because she has progressive dementia and had walked out of the house at 5am ..with no shoes (while we have about 5 degree temps) and was missing for an hour. When the cops found her she said her & her son were cleaning a house a few blocks away and she had left her glasses there. She's been retired for 5 years.
Now he and I are talking daily (which we usually talk anyway when we get the time..such as thats what best friends do), but I get the feeling he's drinking heavily. Normally I would say anyone should be drinking...but he's been battling alcoholism for many years, and was finally starting to do better (he put himself into counseling to try to better himself).
I really dont know what I'm gonna do...or why I posted this. I really just needed to rant and get all of this out in the open in some hopes that it will ease my mind.
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Posted: Wed Jan 27, 2010 6:29 pm
The best thing you can do is it to be there for him when he needs you, and to keep him from drinking himself into oblivion.
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Posted: Thu Jan 28, 2010 8:44 am
Try taking him away from the drinks? Take him out to a movie, some kinda game place, hell go to his house or your house and play board games.... Try to keep his mind from wandering down that drinkin path. Be there for him the best you can.
Im sorry to hear about your loss. : [
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Posted: Thu Jan 28, 2010 2:15 pm
Thank you all for your words. I tend to be very logical with death..it's my personal belief that it cures the person of the pain that they were in and takes them to a better place (heaven, a ski resort, shangri la, etc).
As for my friend, it sucks that we live 30 miles apart. In the summer that is not an issue, I can just drive there within 20 minutes...but this is the downside to living in a land covered with 6 feet of snow and icy roads.
The other night I would have drove out to go get him and have him stay with me for awhile, but the funeral was today (just got back literally 13 minutes ago). Luckily I know that his next AA meeting is Monday night, and having been to NA/AA meetings before, I hope the weather is good then because I plan to drive down there...go to his meeting with him, then drive him back here to stay with me for as long as he needs, if he is willing to accept.
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Posted: Thu Jan 28, 2010 5:06 pm
I'm sorry for you and your friend's loss. He's very lucky to have you by his side.
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