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 Posted: Sun Jan 17, 2010 9:01 pm
Eustace opened her eyes and pulled her disheveled hair away from her face. Normally, she slept with her braid, but it was loose this morning and she was not quite awake enough to think about exactly how that came to be. She felt quite rested, but had a very high desire to sleep in for whatever reason. It was like she was more comfortable at that moment than she had ever been in her life. She closed her eyes again and rolled onto her side, pulling the blanket closer to herself. It was unusually cold this morning. Eustace opened her eyes again. Something wasn't right. She lifted the blanket up and looked underneath it. This was indeed very strange. Normally, she at least wore pajamas. Regardless, she still wanted to sleep and the fact that it was cold made her want even more to stay in bed. Eustace tugged more at the covers. Even more strange, they didn't give. Were they stuck underneath the mattress? That didn't happen often, but it had happened once in a blue moon. She sat up and turned her head to see what was causing this and all of her tiredness disappeared.
There was a man in her bed. On instinct, Eustace lifted the covers and looked. There was a naked man in her bed. Very naked. The kind of naked in which a person wasn't wearing any clothes. Now very awake, Eustace recognized him immediately and remembered exactly what had happened the previous night. Eustace's eyes widened. "Oh my..." was all she managed to say before blushing a very deep shade of red. She remembered everything. She remembered everything in great detail. "O-o-oh m-m-m..." In a few more seconds, her face was burning. Eustace pulled the covers up to cover herself, as if it made any difference. It wasn't anything he hadn't seen before. What was worse was that she had been completely sober during the whole thing! It was, dare she think it, fun! She used one of her hands to hide her face and the other to clasp tightly onto the blanket to hide the rest of her. A centipede attack in winter couldn't bring her to regret it, but she'd be damned if it wasn't the most embarrassing thing ever.
Not to mention, Eustace had no idea if it was appropriate. He was a Private, after all. Every Captain and Lieutenant she had ever heard of had been either dating each other or no one. Whether that reflected on any wolfrider rules or not, she had no idea. One thing that was sure, no one could know, at least not until she figured out what on earth she was going to do about it. She definitely liked Clyde. That much was evident by their mutual nakedness and the bed sharing. She looked away from him. Her blush receded some after he was no longer in view, but it didn't change anything. At the moment, she was very naked, very cold, and very very confused. Oh dear, if this was against the rules, she didn't know what on Earth she was going to do. It didn't change that the last night had been fun or that she liked Clyde very much, but it would make things much more difficult.
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Posted: Sun Jan 17, 2010 9:48 pm
Clyde was a deep sleeper, he always had been. Being a deep sleeper had been the only way to get any sleep in his house growing up. Granted with your entire extended family living in one house you learned to sleep any time and any place you could. When Clyde had gone off to the Academy and into the forts, it had been an ability that proved quite useful then as well. Granted it had also a reputation for getting him in trouble during the summer when Spiritfeather had come and drag him out of bed. And so as it was the movement and noise failed to wake the slumbering red-head from his rather comfortable rest. He had had a wonderful dream that night and was not at all interested in waking up just yet. And Clyde was going to take the advantage of being warm, comfortable, sleepy, and off duty this morning, how often was it that he let himself sleep in after all? Without ever bothering to open his eyes Clyde came to the conclusion that he might as well just keep sleeping.
Or that had been his plan until his covers ran away from him. "Ahhhh." The blast of cold air woke him up and he fought to open his sleep-sealed eyes. "Spirit, give those back." He complained, his voice sleep laced as he pulled himself up and blinked the film from his eyes. The first thing that occurred to him was that that wasn't his wall. This wall was clean and prim, his wall had long ago been vandalized with a mural of an expansive tree Clyde added onto each year. The second thing that occurred to him was this wasn't his floor, it was clean and not covered in splattered paint. Oddly enough the final thing that occurred to Clyde was that he was not alone, there was also a naked woman in this bed that was most certainly not his.
Wait did he hear himself right? Shaking the bit of sleep that determinedly clung to his eyes Clyde ran his hands through his vibrant hair as everything clicked into place around him. Last night had not, in fact, been a dream at all, granted that was not something Clyde was going to protest any time soon. Mostly he was glad that this was real and not in fact just a fantasy, and he was even more pleased when he came to the conclusion that he did not have a hangover, that was always good news as far as Clyde was concerned. The artist drank rarely, but mostly because when he did the hangovers the next morning were like all of hell had unleashed within his skull.
Once Clyde managed to pull together exactly where he was there was another problem he had to face. The fact that Eustace seemed utterly shocked. Clyde smiled at her, his green eyes still glistening with sleep and his tousled hair forming something of a ring around his head. Without really thinking Clyde reached out and rested his hand against her cheek, almost as if reassuring himself that she was in fact there, "Good Morning, Eustace." His tone was gentle and caring, an attempt to calm her down at least somewhat. Also hoping she would ease up on the covers a bit, he was freezing right now. It also somewhat occurred to him that she might be regretting this, that somehow he had overstepped his boundaries, he certainly hoped not. The last thing he wanted was to leave here with her regretting this, if such a thing happened he might just have to transfer forts, and he didn't want to leave her.
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RainbowMagicMarker Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Jan 18, 2010 7:35 pm
When Clyde awoke, his voice barely registered, if at all. Eustace was too busy trying to figure out what the protocol for relationships might be and ways to get around it if it was inappropriate. She wasn't going to give up on her first serious relationship. That is, at least Eustace thought it had been serious. She didn't claim to know how Clyde thought about it and she just assumed that it had been just as serious for him. If Eustace considered any other possibilities, she'd go crazy and likely chase him down with a loaded firearm of some sort. But as far as she was concerned, that wasn't a problem. It wouldn't be a problem until she got any indication that he had just been toying with her. Clyde wasn't like that, she convinced herself. Everything he'd done while they were together told her that he was a good person. Regardless, she couldn't help liking him now. The damage was done.
As soon as Clyde touched her, Eustace was brought out of whatever recesses of her mind she had previously been occupying. It took a little bit, but she finally became aware that Clyde was awake and he was speaking to her. And as shocked as she was, though she did know who it was and that there was no danger, she leaped to the side to escape, screaming and taking the covers with her to the floor with a loud thump. That would definitely give him the wrong impression. "Um... Th-that is... Good morning to you too." She struggled to get up while tangled in the covers, but better that than give Clyde an eyeful (and she still wasn't sure why she was so embarrassed about it now when she hadn't been the night before). Eustace wrapped the covers around herself as best she could and turned head to Clyde. He still had the sheet and it at least made things... opaque. She looked around frantically for her clothes. She didn't remember putting them away and didn't see them anywhere on the floor.
Eustace ran through the events of the previous night, trying to figure out where she might have left them. As much as she tried, her mind kept fast forwarding to later events. The blush on her face repeated. Gah, why did she have to keep thinking about that? They couldn't have left them downstairs in her office, could they? The blush darkened. If something like that had happened, how would she go about getting them back? What if someone was nearby? They could see her through the window! If they were there, she could always send Clyde to go get them. No! That was even worse! People couldn't know about something like that! If Clyde went down there naked except for a sheet, they would definitely figure it out. "Y-you... Don't know where my... o-our clothes are, d-do you?"
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Posted: Sat Jan 23, 2010 8:05 am
Drawing his hand back to his chest Clyde tightened the sheet around him. Of course she regretted it; she was his Captain and nothing more. He had been foolish to think otherwise. He had led himself directly into the trap that he had told himself he wouldn't fall to. When he had first enrolled in the Academy he had expected to give up any chance at finding someone like Eustace, any sort of relationship. When he had met Eustace and begun to get involved with her had had hoped it was meant as much to her as it did to him. But he seemed to have been wrong. Now all she wanted was for him to leave, now that she was done toying with him she simply wanted him to get out and allow her to get back to her duties. Fine then, he would be the bigger person, he would leave and go about his own day as if this had never happened.
But it had happened, and even now as bitter disappointment washed over him he couldn't make the images go away. She had seemed so much more willing last night, he couldn't mesh the Eustace that stood before him with the Eustace of last night, it was as if they were two different people. Nothing about this felt right to him, this morning just seemed so wrong and so contradictory to everything that he had known about Eustace before now. There was no way everything from before had been just a façade to toy with him. There was something wrong with Eustace, there was something that was causing her to act like this. The blush on her face caused Clyde to smile if only slightly. "I'm afraid I do not." He barely gave the question second thought. It didn't matter to him, not right now anyway. Even through his conflicting thoughts and her strange behavior he could not forget how beautiful she was. As an artist he could not actively try to hide that beauty, to him it was akin to sacrilege.
And there was something more important he needed to work out anyway. Some sort of understanding had to come between them about this night. It couldn't just stand as it was, he couldn't just leave and forget, not until he understood what had driven her to act like this. And even deeper than that, he didn't want to lose her, he had given her everything and he wasn't so sure he had the strength to leave. It seemed like a short time but she had become the center of his life. He had never been attached to anyone in the forts before, and she had broken down all his solidarity. If he left here as things stood he was certain he'd have to transfer, he'd have to leave Eustace and his fort and his vandalized Barracks. And on top of all that he wasn't so sure he was willing to go anywhere where Calla was in charge, not to mention the rumors he'd heard about her lover and children. "Eustace." It was barely above a whisper, containing the same reverence as it had since the start of her relationship, when she had decided to ignore the regulations he was sure were in place to pursue a relationship with him, "Are… Are you alright?" He could think of no way to beat around the bush on this one, he'd simply have to go to the heart of it. Clyde allowed his grip on the sheets to lax, patting the bed beside him. A silent plea for her to sit.
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RainbowMagicMarker Vice Captain
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Posted: Sat Feb 13, 2010 2:08 pm
That was it. She was done for. Embarrassment in this situation would be unavoidable. That is, if some unfortunate soul was walking past the window on a late morning stroll. She didn't know where her clothes were and neither did Clyde. Not to mention, if he walked out of her office this early in the day, it wouldn't be too difficult to put two and two together. It didn't help anything when Clyde had the nerve to ask Eustace if she was all right. All right? All right!? Of course she wasn't all right! She was standing naked in her bedroom with no knowledge of the location of her clothes while a naked subordinate was in her bed asking if she was all right! There had to be some regulation against this, some rule that if word got around that she broke, everyone in the fort would lose what little respect they had for her! Eustace had half a mind to reach into her drawer, get a pair of panty hose, and strangle him with them.
Eustace mentally smacked herself. This was where she lived. These were her barracks. Given the absence of a Lieutenant, this entire building belonged to her. That being said, the clothes in the dresser were hers as well. There wouldn't be any problem. She would just get dressed in whatever pajamas she had and go downstairs, find their uniforms. Sure, if people looked in, they would wonder what she was doing in her pajamas and why her uniform happened to be in her office and not on her. But this was all fine, just a bit inappropriate. Light years better than if she had gone down there in a blanket, or worse, Clyde in his sheet. It was an unfortunate truth that whenever something could go wrong, Eustace assumed the worst case scenario. Perhaps it made her more cautious and a better leader during battles, but in any other situation, it caused unnecessary worry and confusion. She visibly relaxed and smiled at Clyde. Hadn't he asked her a question of some sort?
"Hm? Oh! Yes. Thank you," Eustace answered finally, turning to search her drawers for something she could put on. Finding an oversized white T-shirt and some undergarments, she took them in hand and began toward the bathroom. Wait. The expression that Clyde was wearing. He looked... Was he sad? She sat on the bed next to him. Something was definitely wrong and her worry showed unadulterated on her face. "I-is something wrong?" He couldn't be feeling regrets, could he? Sure, she had chased him with a gun not too long ago, but given the circumstances of the previous day, Eustace had thought he'd gotten past all that. That is to say, she thought he had forgiven her.
Or maybe... He hadn't enjoyed himself? Oh no! Eustace felt like she could cry. It was the first time she'd ever done anything like that. It wasn't her fault if she wasn't good at it! It wasn't like she had any way to practice! Not without being totally promiscuous, anyway. Clyde didn't seem like the kind of person who would tell everyone that sort of thing, but if he left her for something like that, there was no telling if any future relationships she had were ended because of her lack of skill. Eustace was getting ahead of herself. He obviously wanted to talk to her and if it was about that, then she could give it another try. Maybe if she explained everything to him, he would be willing to teach her!
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Posted: Sat Feb 13, 2010 8:00 pm
Earnestly Clyde sent out a silent plea when frustration fluttered across Eustace’s face. That was is then, she didn’t want to talk about it because she didn’t want him. She was just trying to get rid of him, her furtive glances and annoyed look told him that plainly. She didn’t want his questions, she didn’t want him at all. Though the look on her face told him one thing, she seemed about to say something. At least then it would all be out in the open. She would have to be honest that she didn’t want him if she wanted him to go away. He wasn’t going to make that easy for her, not after all this. Not after all he had given her. He wouldn’t let it go just like that, he had seen how that always ended, on both the giving and receiving ends, amongst his cousins. It never ended well, not for anyone.
But then she dropped the annoyed look. And it seemed like she was going to simply ignore his request. And then he was truly lost. How could anyone be so cruel? To toy with him like this and then to simply ignore his pleas? He certainly knew himself that he could never do such a thing to a person. It was just wrong, on so many different levels that he didn’t care to contemplate. His green eyes strayed down to where his hand fiddled with the edge of the sheet. If that was what she wanted then. For him to simply disappear, for him to leave her alone. He wouldn’t sink to her level, he would give her exactly what she wanted. But he didn’t want to, he couldn’t make himself move, he couldn’t make himself remember the last time he’d seen his clothes. He couldn’t make himself just turn around and forget it all. So focused was he on his own hands that he completely missed one of the rare smiles he prized so much.
Finally though her words sunk in, mild pleasantries though, that he found it difficult to even acknowledge. He didn’t even look up at first, until she finally bid his gesture and sat beside him on the bed. That made him look up, last he had seen was her walking away from him. And suddenly a deep guilt hung across him. The worry that sat so plainly on her face, directed surely at him, and the tears that seemed on the verge of falling from her silver eyes. He had been wrong. He knew in that moment how wrong he had actually been. This was the Eustace he knew, this was the Eustace he had been with last night. The worry and the fear and everything that he had fallen for. Without thinking he reached out again, resting his hand on her shoulder in an attempt to comfort her, to reassure her. “I was going to ask you the same thing.” He whispered, struggling to put together some sort of sentence to convey what he wanted to say, it was so rarely that words failed him. “You seem…distant.”
That wasn’t what he wanted. Why was it that whenever he wanted to speak to her he could never find the proper words. He could write them down just fine, but never in a way that he would be pleased to show her. All he could give her was the drawings and paintings he did. That was all he had ever seen worthy of giving to such a beautiful woman. She would never admit that she was, but whenever Clyde looked at her he was struck by it. To have brought worry and grief to that face gave him great regret. He would have to make it up to her, once he discovered what it was that was bothering her.
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RainbowMagicMarker Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Jul 05, 2010 5:08 am
Eustace shied away from Clyde's touch, but she let him keep his hand on her shoulder if it comforted him some. In a way, it felt more intimate than what they had done before. Then, it was passion, it was bodily, palpable in the biology. Then, Eustace could blame it on being flustered or aroused, but now, it had to be intimate in the mind. It felt too soon to love him, but it didn't stop the attachment that she felt, something indescribable. When Clyde put his hand on her shoulder, he was trying to comfort her mind, not her body and both comforts she liked. But at the same time, it felt wrong, like the contact and these feelings were bad, as most of the things that felt good tended to be. It was confusing and it was dragging her mind in several different directions.
On the one hand, there was no denying that Eustace enjoyed the night before. If she hadn't, then all she would have had to to was call LunarFlare into the room and get him to handle things. On the same hand, she knew that she had feelings for Clyde and she definitely didn't want to hurt him. On the other hand, she couldn't help but feel like what they were doing and what they did was wrong. She didn't know if it was against any rules, but as the Captain, Eustace had to treat all of her subordinates equally. Eustace couldn't give Clyde any special treatment and she certainly couldn't be worrying about him on the battlefield more than any other. She knew that would cause problems. It was a huge dilemma that she had trouble putting into words.
That wouldn't stop her from trying, though, since the first thing she had to do was communicate all of this to Clyde without hurting him. And who knows? Maybe they wouldn't have to end their relationship. Maybe they would find that balance between work and... recreation. "I just.... I just need to think. I need to think about w-where this is going and-" Eustace looked away from him before continuing, "And if it's okay..." She touched the hand on her shoulder lightly before moving away from him, though she did look at him again. "I... I l... I like you, you know? I just don't know..." If I'm allowed to, she finished in her head. It sounded silly put into such simple words and she knew that he would have some objection to that and that she wouldn't be able to communicate her reasons well enough. He would be hurt or both of them would be hurt and Eustace didn't want that.
Eustace knew that the others didn't put so much merit into protocol. Even with Calla and Alister, Alister was her subordinate. Given, there wasn't as large a gap between ranks as with Eustace and Clyde, but it was still there. Somehow, Eustace just knew that if she wasn't completely careful about what she did, something would go wrong and she would lose her position and all for someone that she might lose at any moment. Like during battle or due to any of the everyday dangers of fort life. That must be why children weren't common among wolfriders, or even lasting relationships. There was just so much to lose.
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Posted: Mon Jul 19, 2010 1:48 pm
Clyde visibly relaxed as she didn’t move away from his touch. That meant something, she didn’t want to leave him, she wanted to keep him and she was comfortable with him. She wouldn’t remove him. He wouldn’t have to transfer. And this gave him a new determination, on some deep level he couldn’t describe it felt like something clicked at that moment and he knew that he wouldn’t leave. No matter what passed between them here at this moment he knew that it wouldn’t be the last. It wouldn’t be goodbye. He wouldn’t let it be goodbye, he would win her over no matter what he had to do.
The conflicted look that crossed over her face did nothing to deter him, even when she removed his hand from her shoulder he knew he would be okay. Like a great fire had lit up somewhere he could push on and out as far as there was fuel to do so, an unstoppable force. It was a strange feeling that he couldn’t really make sense off, maybe at another time he would write, and the words would blend together for him to understand, but now all he knew was that this force would push him through, it would be there as long as he needed it to be and he would feed off of it. And only Eustace could put away this force inside him, and he knew she wouldn’t. Or that was what he thought until she began to speak. Her hesitant words like icey water raining down.
But he couldn’t. Not when she seemed so unsure about the words she said, he couldn’t let it be just that. With effort he stoked the determination, looking her in the eye he attempted to keep his tone as even and balanced as he possible could, no matter how much he wanted to crumble and beg at her feet to not say these words, to not inflict these wounds. “Eustace, I can’t accept that.” He knew he should never speak to his superior officer like that. But he wasn’t on duty, and this was a whole different situation. At least right now, at this moment, he hoped she would accept him as her equal and allow him to speak freely. “If I may speak. I cannot accept those words. I don’t have the strength to.” He’d heard words of love from his cousins as they grew, as they got involved with school and boys and relationships. Words of passion and claims of love. And he’d been there for weddings, the soft words and gentle sweet whispers of nothing. He’d written tales of fiery passion that like a gun blast burned bright and hot before ending in pain and sadness. And he’d written tales of a soft, enveloping love. Like a warm fire burning on an icy night in the calm of winter, enveloping and eternal. But he didn’t know what this was. She liked him, she wasn’t afraid to say that, but what could he say to her.
“I….I like you Eustace.” He spoke slowly, enunciating letter to buy time for his words to make sense, “I understand that duty will always come first, that’s what we agreed to when we became Wolfriders. Our loyalties must lie to our wolves and our forts first and foremost.” It occurred to him briefly how painful these words sounded, how much like rejection. “But I cannot leave this behind Eustace. I gave myself to you fully last night. Never before have I given myself to anyone before.” And oddly he was unashamed to admit that to her, no matter how awkwardly he’d avoided the topic with his Patron so many years ago and he always tried to avoid the subject around Jack and Jack’s friends. That hiding this fact had somehow seemed important at the time. “I can’t walk away from that fact, I cannot walk away from you. This relationship, what we have. It’s new, but it’s solid, it’s still growing. Like a great tree it will take time to reach it’s full height, it’s full power and solidity. But until then it needs to be nourished, not ripped up by the roots.” Out of habit he slipped into the flowery prose he tended to write in when he scribbled away at his notebooks. “I don’t see this as a weed, an infection to be removed before it mars the gardens beauty. Duty may come first, you are a Captain and I am a Private and that is the life we lead. But because of this life we must take what we have when we can.” His determination wavered as slowly his eyes descended down again to the sheet in his lap and the tiny miniscule threads that for some strange reason seemed so fascinating right now, “I can’t make you decide Eustace, the choice is yours. Will you permit me to love you? I don’t know what you see when you look at what we have, do you see a growing sapling of a powerful oak, or do you see the trickster weed?” Where any of this had come from he could not know, he had not intended to say so much at once, to speak so long to her. He had started and he could not stop, and finally he fell into silence, forcing himself to look up from his shaking hands back to her beautiful face, green eyes a mix of deep sadness and hope as high as the stars.
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RainbowMagicMarker Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Jul 19, 2010 3:39 pm
There was silence for a minute and Eustace was tempted to retreat into the bathroom to dress as she had wanted to. And then Clyde spoke. She was tempted to be offended by what he said because she was Captain and because her word was law. Even now when she was being so honest, showing that she could indeed be unsure of something. She was stuttering openly and not concealing what she felt. In the end, it had the same effect, didn't it? Just like the other day when she had pointed a gun at him, despite everything, she was being patronized. With a rifle in her hands, she couldn't make the Privates on the training field that day respect her. When even her mask and that wall that she had spent her life building between herself and the outside world were gone, Clyde was arguing with her. What would it take to get people to respect her? Did she have to martyr herself in battle or would they just think that she was stupid and weak getting herself killed like that? She could yell and scream and shoot her rifle in every direction, but in the end, what good would it do? They would all treat her like a little girl given a big gun that she couldn't handle.
Eustace didn't speak. She knew she would cry and she didn't want to do that in front of a Private, especially not Clyde. And that was only after his first sentence. Maybe that was what she needed to do. Maybe she needed to cry and show the world that that was all that she was good for. Maybe her father was right. Eustace wouldn't stop Clyde from speaking, but at the same time, she wasn't sure how much of it she would hear in place of what she heard her father saying in her head. Even when she was Captain, she was just a clumsy little girl who only wanted her daddy to be proud of her. Was he even proud now? Had the news reached him? Did he even care?
No, she told herself. She couldn't think like that. Not with him here. Eustace would force herself to listen to him and to respond, even if her voice faltered. Clyde spoke again and she smiled. At the same time, something was threatening to drip over the edges of her bottom eyelids. Something was that that she had been trying really hard to keep away. Clyde liked her. Somewhere in her mind, that sentence made sense, though in the conscious part of her brain, she couldn't figure out which aspect he was talking about. Did he want the Captain or did he want the woman he was with last night? The Captain was easily angered, paranoid, but stoic in her position. She would do anything for her fort, but in turn expected everything from her subordinates. The next was consumed with passion. Nothing but that moment mattered, the pleasure that the two of them felt. Or maybe he wanted the Eustace he saw now; fearful, unsure, hesitant. The real Eustace was in those personas somewhere, but the woman herself had never found a good blend of the three.
Eustace rubbed the back of her hand across her eyes, trying to mimic that tired expression one had when they just woke up. He started spouting off facts that she already knew and she was tempted to block it out. Patronizing. She bit her cheek on the inside. She wanted to be angry at Clyde, but she just kept thinking of how much like her father he sounded and her anger changed targets. His next sentence took her by surprise. Eustace hadn't mentioned it. Clyde hadn't mentioned it before just now. There had to be some unwritten rule about that. Though she was trying to be serious and angry and all of those negative emotions at once, her face flushed and betrayed her. Being the visual person that she was, Eustace couldn't help it. Then she was reminded that there must have been something before the sex, something that made her accept his advances and give some of her own. He liked her. She was the only one that he'd...
Clyde began to talk in a way that Eustace wasn't sure whether she liked or not. While it was pretty, she felt somehow embarrassed hearing it. It was sappy in that hopeless romantic way that she read about in books and had overheard from the female privates and academy members. In those days, she had found it silly the way that they idolized love and wanted so badly to have it. Now, feeling what she did and hearing it from Clyde made her question her dislike of it. He asked her permission to love her. It was hers to permit. In the same way, was it not Clyde's responsibility to give her permission to love him? Maybe that was all of the permission they needed. When he finished speaking, Eustace waited a bit in case he had anything more to say. Then she answered.
"I do." She said. If he was to ask permission from her, then he would certainly give her permission, wouldn't he? "W-what about me?" Eustace asked, "Will y-you permit me t-to..." It was a difficult word to say to anyone and it was stuck in her throat like a lump. "Lo-lo...Love... you?" She didn't know whether to think of their relationship as the sapling or the weed, but weed or not, she was fooled. Eustace returned his gaze, so much less sure than he looked to her. Eustace didn't know why she was so scared. Did she really expect him to laugh, say "Gotcha!" and walk out of her barracks wearing nothing but a smile?
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